"Alright pups, dinner time!" Ryder called out. One by one, the pups slowly obeyed and came to eat. It had been a couple of weeks since they had lost Everest, but regardless, it still hit them like a truck. None of them seemed to have much interest in doing much, so most days were spent just laying around the lookout. Luckily, Mrs. Goodway was more than ok with them having as much time off as they needed.

"Hey, where's Marshall?" The boy asked, noticing that he wasn't with the rest. In all honesty, he wasn't really surprised that he didn't see the dally. Ever since Everest's death, he rarely left his puphouse. Even when he did, it wasn't for long. 

"He's probably in his puphouse, I'll go get him. Or at least try to." Chase replied, mumbling out the last part. He stopped eating with Skye and entered the lookout elevator as it descended, knowing full well it'd take some convincing just to get his brother out.

The shepherd walked over to Marshall's puphouse, being greeted with his muffled cries through the walls. "Hey buddy, dinners ready." He told him as he knocked on the door, trying to get his attention

"I-I'm not hungry." The dally responded quietly. Chase let out a sigh, he knew this is what would happen. For the last week, even getting Marshall to eat could be hard. It seemed like he had completely given up. 

"Listen, you didn't eat breakfast. I'm not letting you get out of this one. Plus, you know this isn't healthy. You need to come eat." The shepherd insisted. A few seconds passed before he finally saw the door open, revealing a very tired and upset dalmatian.

His watery eyes had bags under them from sleepless nights of crying. Even if he was able to fall asleep, he had awful nightmares. Ones that he refused to explain to the rest of the team, but they knew he was terrified of them. He was still wearing Everest's collar, but that was something Chase assumed wouldn't be coming off for a while. If ever.

Without a word, the two rode up the elevator into the observatory. The quiet and depressing atmosphere was still the same as he had left it. Ryder was happy to see the dally entering. He would be lying if he said he was expecting him to actually come up.

Once they were all done with their dinner, Ryder spoke up. "Hey, why don't we watch a movie tonight? It might help us take our minds off everything." He suggested, thinking it was a good idea. All of the pups agreed, and to his surprise, so did Marshall.

During the movie, Marshall noticed Chase and Skye snuggling up with each other. He almost felt jealous of the two, they looked so happy with each other. He wanted to be like that with Everest, but that was impossible now.

He tried to get his attention back to the movie, but he just couldn't. No matter how hard he tried, he could never get these stupid thoughts out of his mind. Things like, "you should've saved her" or "you're weak, you never deserved her love." Those thoughts just brought him even more guilt and despair. 

"Marshall!" Chase yelled, snapping him out of his thoughts. "The movies over you know." He told him. Marshall turned his head to the tv and saw that it had been turned off. Had he really been wrapped up in his thoughts for that long?

"Oh, sorry about that. I guess I just got lost in my head." He responded truthfully.

 "It's fine, but it's time for bed. I know you don't want to Marshall, but try and get some sleep." Ryder stated, knowing that although the dally was scared of it due to his nightmares, being sleep-deprived wasn't exactly healthy.

Marshall sighed, knowing there was no point in trying to argue with his owner. He despised sleep, even if most nights he usually didn't. His nightmares didn't even feel like dreams. They were so real. 

Without putting up much of a fight, he accepted it and went downstairs with the other pups. The rest said their goodnights to each other, but he didn't bother to respond to them. He entered his puphouse and looked around at walls which were decorated with pictures, holding some of his best memories. 

There were some pictures of him with his parents. Some of them were with Ryder, Chase, and Skye, from when the Paw Patrol first started. Even back then, he'd always make jokes about the other two's obvious crushes on each other.

Lastly, his personal favorite, was a picture of him and Everest, from the night they first became mates. The husky had her arm wrapped around him, pulling him into her side. They were both leaning into each other as they looked at the camera, smiling without a care in the world. Marshall couldn't help but smile, remembering that night and the joy it brought him. 

◾◻◻⬛◻◻◾

After what seemed like forever, the two broke the kiss. "So, I take that as a yes?" Marshall joked, which made Everest laugh. 

"Of course silly. I would love to be your mate. And I don't ever want to hear that you say that your pathetic again because that couldn't be farther from the truth. Admittedly, you are a bit clumsy, but you're my clumsy pup now." She responded while nuzzling him, which he happily returned.

"Alright then, guess we should probably head back now, right Eve?" He asked, deciding to give her a new nickname, which made her blush a bit.

"Yeah, you're right Marshy. Let's go, the rest are probably waiting for us." She replied, making Marshall blush a bit as well. The two laughed it off and walked over to the tower, which wasn't far away at all. 

Before they got the chance to enter, Marshall stopped her. "Hey, what if we mess with the pups a little?" He offered. Everest snickered a bit at his immature suggestion, but she couldn't help but be interested herself. 

"Sure, why not. What do you have in mind?" The husky asked, trying to keep herself from laughing too much at the idea. Marshall smiled and got to explaining the plan.

"I'll tell them that I chickened out or something since they all knew I was gonna try and confess to you tonight. You just go along with it and act confused, ok?" He explained. Everest nodded and the two walked into the elevator.

Once they got to the top, they were greeted by Ryder and the pups waiting for them. "Sooo, how did it go you two? Enjoy your date?" Chase asked teasingly.

"Yeah, we did. We went out and got some dinner at Mr. Porter's, talked for a bit, watched the sunset, then came back here." Marshall answered. The others looked at each other nervously before they turned back to him,

"Is that all? I mean, what else happened?" Skye questioned, assuming they had left something out. To their surprise, the two pup's faces just turned into confused expressions.

"Uh, nothing else interesting really happened. Why, were you all expecting something? We just hung out" The dally replied, trying to convince the others that he really was just clueless. It was working.

The look on their faces was priceless. What?!" Marshall that was the perfect chance!" Chase exclaimed, and everyone else was clearly thinking the same thing. 

 "Perfect chance to do what? Were we supposed to do something while we were out?" Everest asked, pretending to be as equally confused about the situation.

"I have no idea. I don't know, Chase, what are you even talking about?" He asked. The others looked like they were about to faint, and at this point they were speechless, thinking somehow he had forgotten about the entire reason he asked her out. 

Marshall and Everest exchanged glances before bursting into laughter, which earned confused looks from the rest. "Oh come on. You guys were joking, weren't you?" Ryder asked, in which the two nodded, still dying of laughter. The other started to laugh as well, as the boy took a picture of the new happy couple. 

◾◻◻⬛◻◻◾

Marshall wished that they would be able to share memories like that again. Or for that matter, make any memories again. The dally laid down, trying his hardest to not let his eyes close, fearing what would happen if he did. He laid there for hours until eventually, his body gave in to sleep.

When Marshall opened his eyes, instead of being back in his bed, he was on Jake's mountain. He tried to stand up and move, but couldn't. Confused, he looked around and saw the exact same thing he had weeks ago. Everest being mercilessly attacked. 

Seconds passed, although it felt like hours. The dally pleaded for this pain to stop, but no matter what he did, nothing changed. Eventually, he shut his eyes, trying to block out the horrible sights he was reliving. 

Once he opened his eyes, something was different. Damian wasn't there anymore, leaving a motionless, badly bleeding husky laying in the snow. Marshall forced himself to stand and immediately ran over to her. He got over to her, and although she still seemed to be alive, she was dying, and her condition just brought back more memories. 

"Y-you could've saved me. W-why w-would you just let me die? I-I thought you loved me." She stuttered out as the dally picked her up, holding her in his arms. 

"I'm so sorry. I-I tried. I do love you Eve, I p-promise." He responded with tears forming in his eyes, hoping she'd believe him. However, part of him was telling him it was all true. That he really did let her down.

" N-no you don't. If y-you loved me, this wouldn't be happening. You s-should be the one like this. Y-you never deserved my love....T-this is your fault.....Y-your the reason this h-happened to me." Everest whispered. Marshall wanted to say something in response, but he was too late. Her eyes had closed for the final time. 

Marshall immediately jumped up in his bed. He was back in his puphouse. Safe.....but alone. Once he recalled his dream, he started to cry again. It was the same one he had every single night. No matter how hard he tried to fight it, he'd always end up seeing it all over again.

"S-she's right. T-this is all my f-fault. I'm s-so weak, I couldn't e-even save her. I-I shouldn't even be here anymore" He said aloud to himself through the tears. 

After he calmed down a bit, he got up and walked over to a drawer. He opened it but paused for a moment before taking out its containments. He had done this before, however, he still couldn't help but hesitate. But of course, he let his own words get to him and made up his mind.

 Letting a few more tears fall, he took out a razor blade and cut his paw. It was painful, but it didn't matter. Not anymore.