⌜ chapter thirty-one ⌟

"I didn't know that any of you carried guns anymore." Alec says as he looks down at his sister.

Letty's in Jason's hospital room, she hasn't left since they told her that it was okay for her to go in and stay with him. Her dark, red-ringed eyes are on her best friend, like she's afraid something will happen if she looks away for even a moment.

"He started again after Julian shot him." She tells him, her voice barely loud enough for him to hear.

"Why were the bullets silver?" He asks, confused. "Did he know that there was a werewolf in the area?"

"We saw the papers last month...but it doesn't matter what it is to protect us from a human, and silver protects against humans and any kind of shapeshifter. Was just more convenient."

Alec looks over at Tyler and Reggie, but neither of them know what to say. "Why don't you come down to the cafeteria with me? You need to eat something." He tells his sister.

"I'm not leaving before he wakes up."

"It's not good to take meds on an empty stomach, and you have to take the painkillers and the antibiotics." He says, but she doesn't move. "Scar—"

"I'm not leaving him." Letty cuts him off, and he nods in understanding.

"Why don't we see if there's anything we can bring back?" Tyler suggests. "But you are eating and taking your pills even if I have to sit on you and force it down your throat."

"Yes, Dad." She mutters as the three men leave the room.

Letty stays there, unmoving as she watches Jason's chest rise and fall with every breath that he takes. He lost a lot of blood, and there was internal damage that needed surgery, but the doctors are confident that he'll make a full recovery. And maybe they're right about his body, but Letty doesn't know how they're supposed to survive losing Hope.

For years, the three of them have worked as a team in everything — paying the bills, dealing with heartbreak, sorting through family drama...raising the twins. She doesn't know how they're supposed to tell Faith and Joy that their mom is never coming home. She doesn't know how she's supposed to tell Jason when he wakes up. Hell, she still doesn't believe it herself.

Letty sits up when Jason starts to move. His shaky hand slowly moves up as he reaches for the tube that's sticking in nose. The brunette quickly gets to her feet before moving toward him, and she grabs his hand.

"You gotta leave that alone, Jase." She says, and his blue eyes shift to her, trying to find the face that goes with the familiar voice. "Doc says you need it, just for a little while."

"Scar?" His voice is hoarse as he tries to speak.

"You're okay." She tells him. "You're gonna be just fine."

"There was...a were—"

"Werewolf, yeah." She nods. "I killed it, it's dead." She says, and his gaze travels her face as he tries to remember what happened.

"Hope." He says, and her eyes fill with tears as she takes a deep breath.

"Tyler called your dad — he's on his way. I think he's almost here." Letty says, trying to change the subject so that she doesn't have to tell him just yet.

"Is she okay?" He asks. "I don't remem-remember much. I was walking with you...and it jumped in front of her. I saw its face... Where is she? Shouldn't you both be driving me nuts right about now for almost breaking my promise?"

"Jase..." She clenches her teeth as she looks down at him.

Jason moves his hand, and she lets go of it as he reaches for her face. "No." He mutters as his fingers brush over her cheek, wiping away her tears before settling on the side of her face. "She ca— She can't be..."

"She lost too much blood, hit her h-head when it threw us." She hiccups as she watches the tears build in his eyes.

He'd scream if he could, but he can't find the strength to even speak another word. Instead he drops his hand from her face and his fingers curl around her shirt at her side, trying to pull her closer to him. Understanding what he wants, Letty carefully climbs up onto the bed with him. 

Most of his injuries are to his left side, so she's not too concerned about hurting him because she's on his right as she lays beside him. Her head rests on his shoulder as his right arm wraps around her back, and her own arm rests high on his torso, on his chest, to avoid his stitches. Her own stitches in her right arm aches with the pressure of her laying on it, but she can't bring herself to care about the discomfort. Jason's chest heaves with a sob as his free hand finds hers, and he curls his fingers around her own.

The door opens then, but neither of them look to see who it is. Instead, Jason turns his head toward Letty and presses a kiss to her forehead. She squeezes her eyes shut as she fights back tears, and his arm tightens around her as his thumb moves in small circles.

Bobby walks up behind Letty, and only then does Jason look up to see who's there. His blue eyes meet his fathers, and he can see the sadness there as the older man lays his hand on Letty's arm, giving it a light squeeze, though knowing he can't really bring either of them any comfort. It's the first that Jason can recall ever seeing his father look so sad, and that's what makes the reality of the situation really sink in for him.

Hope's gone, and she's never coming back. They'll never see her again.

—

"I would like to welcome you all to the graduation ceremonies of the class of '98." Mr. Feeny says from the stage where he's standing with the Seniors, and everyone claps as he then turns to face the students. "Congratulations, we did it!"

"Yeah. You see Tío Shawn?" Letty nods as Faith points to the boy on the stage. She has Faith in her lap, and Jason has Joy in his where he's sitting beside this best friend.

"And now it's time to introduce our valedictorian, a student who exemplifies academic excellence, as well as extracurricular achievement and social conscience."

"She got one more lousy A than I did." Minkus says as he stands up, and the students on either side of him pull him back into his seat.

"Ladies and gentlemen, Miss Topanga Lawrence." Mr. Feeny announces, and the blonde stands up as everyone claps for her.

"Thank you, Mr. Feeny." Topanga smiles at him from behind the podium before turning her attention to the audience. "Ladies and gentlemen, my fellow class members of the class of '98, I am very honored to be your valedictorian, and I worked very hard on this speech. However, I'm not going to give it. Because I know somebody who could give a much better speech than I ever could. Ladies and gentlemen, my good friend, Shawn Hunter."

Shawn gets up from his seat beside Cory and then he hugs the blonde before going to stand behind the podium himself. "Thank you, Topanga." He smiles at her, and then looks out at the audience. "You know, I read her speech. It kicked butt." He says, and Letty smirks as she watches her younger brother. "I attended John Adams High School sporadically during the last four years. I barely have a C average. That's why I'm here.

"Mr. Feeny asked us to write about what we were feeling this week, and, of course, I was feeling like I always do: I couldn't wait to get out of here. But now, high school is over. And just when I'm finally free, I find myself sneaking back into this place and sitting in the hall, thinking about my friends, and all the time we spent here. And you, Mr. Feeny." He says as he then turns to look at his teacher. "I started thinking about you and how you've always told us what to do without ever telling us what to do. You taught us about life." He looks back at the audience, and his eyes land on his older sister as he continues. "I was thinking about how much this place has been my home, and how many times I screwed up while I was here, how I could've done better.

"And I thought a lot about what a friend of mine was telling me a couple weeks ago. She was telling me how happy she was with her life, and how much she loved raising her daughters, but that she had a few regrets. And one of which was that she didn't try harder when it came to school. She thought that she couldn't do it, that school wasn't meant for her, but that she learned later, from watching a friend of ours, that life is what you make of it. And she told me that she didn't want me to regret my own decisions with my education when I get older. In fact, I think... I think this is the last conversation that I ever had with her." Shawn looks between Letty and Jason as the older boy reaches over and takes her hand in his, intertwining their fingers as they both try to refrain from crying as he talks about Hope. "And now that she's gone, I can't get that last conversation out of my head...because I had decided that college wasn't meant for me either, but she asked me to reconsider...

"I could've done better in high school. That's, um... That's what I wrote. That's how I feel. I'm sorry. I could've done better." He repeats as he looks at Mr. Feeny again, and then he looks at his class. "Congratulations to those of you who did."

Mr. Feeny stands up at the end of his speech and moves forward to shake his hand. "Shawn, that was a fine paper. No one could've done better." He tells him, and Shawn smiles.

Feeny then starts calling the names of the graduating class, and the families cheer for the kid that they're there for. Shawn smiles as he takes his diploma from Mr. Feeny, and then he turns to look at Letty, using the rolled up paper to point at her.

"Thank you." He mouths, and the older girl smiles as she wipes a tear from her cheek.

After getting through every name, Feeny looks out at the audience again. "Ladies and gentlemen, the John Adams High School class of 1998." He announces, and the graduates then throw their caps into the air.

Eric takes Faith from Letty when he sees Shawn run forward and jump off of the stage, and the brunette quickly moves to meet him. As soon as he's close enough, he wraps his arms tightly around her, and she smiles as she hugs him back.

"I am so proud of you." Letty tells him. "Today, tomorrow, always."

"I'm going to Pennbrook." Shawn says, and she pulls back to look at him. "Hope was right, I'll regret it if I don't try." He says, and she takes a deep breath as she hugs him again.

⌜ author's note ⌟

book six is up. it's called...
Six Stages Of Grief