alina and billy

. ✧ ・゜. +・o ✧

 "What," taunted Neil. "Afraid you're gonna get hurt, is that it?"

"No," choked out Billy. He sounded like he was on the verge of tears, which made the strangeness of seeing him as a kid even stranger for Alina. Right now, instead of the abusive, racist asshole Alina knew and despised, Billy Hargrove was a meek, shy kid who loved surfing and his mom. Again, that question thudded through Alina's mind. What went wrong?

Alina wanted to close her eyes and ears, wanted to walk away yet again, because this was worse than the Mind Flayer and the flayed Billy Hargrove. This was a reminder of all the shit she'd gone through. This was a reminder of what she'd been trying to get over ever since she was nine years old.

But now she was reliving it again. Her mother's piercing tones whenever Alina did something remotely wrong, whenever she tripped and skinned her knee, got mud on her dress, whenever she spoke out of turn or during dinner parties or played in the sandbox with boys her age. Whenever she played soccer instead of piano and faked sick in an attempt to get out of laundry duty, whenever she fought back from the racist insults of her classmates and caused a call to be sent home.

It was almost agony for Alina to get closer to Neil, even though tears were spilling down her face now. El was squeezing her hand so tight it was nearly cutting off the circulation, but she was barely even paying attention to the pain. The pain of Neil Hargrove's' words and the memories that came with were enough.

"Well, what then?" Neil cried now. "What? What did I raise, a pussy for a son?"

More of Linda's words trickled back into Alina's ears. What did I raise, a boy for a daughter?

No, Linda, she thought back. You just raised a human.

"Leave me alone!" Billy cried, jerking his arm out of Neil's tight hold. The baseball glove he was holding fell to the ground as he tore away from his father.

"Hey!" Neil shrieked. And then: "That's right, run! Like you always do!"

That's right, Alina! You're a menace to be around!

I think the real menace was you, Linda, Alina told her mother, and then a burst of rage shot through her. El sensed it, and then she and Alina were running, tearing after Billy, not just because they knew they should probably follow him to get to the source, but because they wanted to get as far away from Neil as they could.

Alina's heart was pounding, and her eyes were wet and stinging. Neither of those things were from the fierce storm that continued to rage, getting wilder and wilder the further in the girls got.

El took a second to shoot a deathly glare at Neil Hargrove as she ran past him, and Alina couldn't resist flipping up her middle finger. She'd done that to Linda, too, as a tiny eight-year-old. She didn't remember why—perhaps she was just tired of the brutal treatment—but she did remember feeling angrier than she'd ever felt before. And that Linda hadn't gone for the switch this time. Just struck Alina full on the face with the back of her hand.

Neither Alina or El spoke or even looked at each other after they began running. They just chased Billy, knowing that they were here to find the source as soon as possible, and to even take a second to speak may be a second to long. And besides, their thoughts were loud enough for the both of them.

It got cloudier and cloudier, crimson lightning striking across the clouds, and as Alina and El followed Billy, Neil's voice echoed over their heads. "Where were you last night?" he spat. "Where were you?"

"I told you, I was with Wendy," replied Billy's mother, her voice awash in fear.

"Stop lying to me!"

Billy vanished into the clouds, his young figure being swallowed up by them, and Alina and El skidded to a stop, looking around wildly. Neither of them could tell which way they'd come from, which way was which. They were caught up in the storm of Billy's violent memories, and, as Alina looked around, she realized that Mike actually hadn't been overreacting when he'd said that Billy's mind was a sick and twisted place. It was. Oh, it was. Gone was the serenity of the beach. Gone was the illusion of hope. Gone was anything slightly bright.

"I'm not lying to you!" Billy's mother screamed, and Alina finally caught sight of her through the fog. She was standing with her back to the girls, her hair blowing in the wind, facing Neil, while the young Billy sat at a table, witnessing this conflict. Alina couldn't see his face, but she'd heard enough arguments from Brandon and Linda to know that he was barely choking down sobs.

How strange it was, that Alina and Billy's pasts were so similar, yet they'd been led in completely different directions. How strange it was that they were connected in a way neither of them had known about before now.

"You saw him again, didn't you?" Neil spat. "Didn't you?!"

You went to the lab again, didn't you? Linda asked Brandon. And you brought Alina with you! Stop doing that! I don't want her exposed to those kinds of things!

"Get away from me!" Billy's mother shoved Neil to the side. Billy stood up, unable to take his eyes off the scene, as Neil straightened up again. Alina didn't have to see his face to know he was spitting mad. But Billy's mom wasn't done. As he staggered towards her, Billy's mother got her hands on a plate and threw it at him. There was the telltale shattering of china, and although Neil ducked, Alina could tell he'd been hit.

"You—you whore!" Neil screamed. And that was when Billy ran forward.

"Stop it!" he pleaded.

"Bitch!"

Billy tackled Neil, latching onto him. "Don't hurt her!" he screamed.

Stop hurting each other! A six-year-old Alina screamed.

"No!" Billy's mother screamed.

"Don't hurt her!"

"You bastard!"

Neil threw Billy away like he was nothing, and as Billy was stumbling back, Neil lunged forward, hitting his wife across the face. Alina let out a gasp as she fell to the ground, a surplus of tears springing to her eyes, and tried to run towards the scene. It was only El's hand that stopped her.

"Mom!" Billy yelled, running towards the figure swallowed up by the fog.

And then the scene dissolved. They all disappeared. And young Billy's voice echoed around them. "I don't understand," he asked. "Why not? Please, Mom, don't do this."

Alina and El whipped around to find Billy sitting against his bed, the phone to his ear, yet again, barely choking down tears. "Please come home," he cried. "No. How long? How long?! I miss you."

Billy's mother had left, too.

Alina's heart lurched. She'd never really thought about Billy's childhood, solely for the fact that she hated thinking about Billy. But apparently, she'd assumed that his parents had divorced on mutual terms, when this seemed like it wasn't the case. And it seemed that Neil Hargrove had passed down his racist ideology onto his son.

It could explain why Billy had done some of the things he'd done. Of course, nothing would excuse him hurting Lucas, Steve, Alina herself... but it might have been a reason. Because he was bred on violence.

But I was too, Alina thought, her eyes blurred with tears. I was too, Billy, and I crawled my way out of it.

"Get back here!" Billy sounded older now, and as Alina whipped around yet again, she saw him. There was a laugh in his voice, like he quite enjoyed what he was doing. Which happened to be pounding someone into the ground, just like he'd done with Steve. Alina could hear his fists connecting with flesh as he taunted whoever he was hitting. Just like with Steve. King Steve.

"Get up!" he ordered. "What, are you scared to fight me? You scared?!" he got to his feet, screaming at the figure Alina and El couldn't see. "Get up and fight me, pussy! Pussy!"

This was where things changed. This was where Alina could no longer relate.

They were deeper now. The happy memories were long gone. And Billy Hargrove had been morphed into a twisted version of his father, the one who relished in pain and insult. Abusive. Taunting. Racist. Horrible. This was who Alina hated. This was what she couldn't forgive him for. Because he reminded her too much of her mother, of the sting of the switch, of the bite of her words. That was something she could never excuse.

"Billy, come over here," said Neil. Alina whipped around yet again. "I want you to meet someone."

Neil had his hands on someone's shoulder, and it took a moment for Alina to spot the fiery red hair of the figure. Max. It was a younger version of Max.

Max's stepfather led the little Max over to Billy, and Alina and El stepped towards her curiously. They were both crying now, which made it a little hard to see—especially with the addition of the fog—but they wiped their eyes quickly.

"This is your new sister," Neil introduced. "Her name's Maxine."

"Max," the little girl corrected. Alina squeezed El's hand even tighter.

"Shake her hand," Neil started to instruct, but his voice trailed off as Billy's voice, the Billy Alina knew, began to thunder around them. But there was a difference in it. It was filled with fear.

"Who's there?" he called. "I said, who's there?!"

It was getting harder to see now. Alina could barely even see El through the thick storm, and she was glad that they were connected. Otherwise they might get lost in the storm of memories forever. Be swallowed up by the clouds. And, unlike on the beach, this wasn't a memory Alina wanted to be stuck in.

Then Billy screamed, and two beams of light penetrated through the thick fog. As Billy's screams lit up the skies, Alina and El moved closer to it, seeing the beams belonged to a car. Billy's car.

They were getting closer.

The two of them moved forward faster now, ducking under whipping branches, their faces bathed in red light, their hearts hammering in their chests, when, all of a sudden, everything came to a stop. The wind stopped tugging at their hair. The fog faded away, even though everything was still red as the blood that had come out of Brandon on the day he'd died. And Alina finally raised her gaze to look at the source.

It was an abandoned building. A factory, perhaps. Billy's car was parked in front of it, the glass shattered like it had been in the void, but that wasn't the thing giving Alina the chills. No, that had to be the clouds spinning together above their heads, red and black and gray, the frequent booms of thunder and violent strikes of lightning. All of it whirling right around the source. Right around them.

El let out a breath. "I think we found it," she told the others. The others. Alina had almost forgotten about her friends clustered around her real-life body. Safe from harm. Safe from the memories. Safe from the lightning. "The source."

"Where, El?" Max asked frantically. "Where are you two?"

Alina made out the name of the building they were standing in front of. "Brimborn Steelworks," she said loudly, trying to make sure her voice would be heard above the wind. "The source is at Brimborn Steelworks."

There. It was done. They'd found it.

There was a beat, and then Mike spoke. "El, Al, we found it. Get out of there. Get out!"

Alina and El exchanged a look, and then both of them closed their eyes, willing themselves out of Billy's mind. And then everything went in reverse. She and El fell back up through the black void where Billy had released them, the same images he'd shown them flashing before her mind for milliseconds. The Mind Flayer, the strangling, the dilated pupils. The scream came back through her mouth.

And then something different happened. Something terrible.

Her hand slipped right out of El's just as Alina tugged her blindfold off.

. ✧ ・゜. +・o ✧

a/n: uh oh, that can't be good 😳😳 

okay but fr, i've been waiting for FOREVER to post the next chapter because i am so excited for it, so get ready!! it's coming soon!! any theories on what's gonna happen?? is alina going to meet billy, like el did, or someone else entirely?? idk 😳

'till next time!