┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ 〈 🎤 〉 ⋟ ┈ ┈ ┈

⇒ God's Menu Restaurant
7:30pm

"A boyfriend?"

"Yep," Felix nodded lightly, lips thinning into a tight line in attempt to keep back a smile that begged to accompany the red tint on his cheeks before taking another sip of what was left his passionfruit drink. "What about you? You look like you have a special someone as well."

Looking to the side with a slight pout resting on his lips, Hyunjin patted his fingers against the vinyl table mat, heart dropping at the younger's admission but still a bit determined to dig deeper- out of curiosity, at least, just incase there was some sort of loophole in the boy's relationship since not even his best friend seemed to be aware of such a vital, personal factor. "Well... how long have you two been together, if I may ask?"

"About two and a half months." Felix shrugged with his words, unable to hold back a soft giggle at just the precious thoughts of his relationship. "But don't tell Seungmin, please. You're the first person to even find out."

"First?"

"Mhm..."

"How come I'm the first? Are you two top secret or something?" Hyunjin chuckled sarcastically, casually blowing a few loose strands from his face. "I don't mean to pry but, don't you two go out on dates? I mean, people see you, right?"

Freckled smile dimming and tongue flicking at the roof of his mouth, Felix pursed his lips in deep, sudden thought, eyes stuck in a blank gaze at the center of the table. He sighed before speaking up, lips pouting with their movements instead of the radiant twist as before, his new dampened demeanor forcing a subtle feeling of guilt into Hyunjin's own conscience. "No, we don't do public dates, and yes, we're really top secret, as you said."

Pushing aside the low voices in his subconsciousness that were persistently ringing for the boy to halt and cancel all plans of proceeding with the obviously uncomfortable conversation, Hyunjin decided to dig deeper, leaning closer to the table and resting both elbows on the surface, prepping his chin against his fists. "I understand, but at the same time, I don't understand. I mean, if it's so top secret, then why did you tell me? Why did you make me the first person to know? I mean, it's obvious that you really want to talk about it or boast it, but you can't... And the way your expression just dropped gives it all away."

"Do you wanna be a fucking detective or a psychologist or something?" Felix spoke deeply, eyes rolling out of annoyance and slight discomfort before uselessly fighting to lock eyes with a waiter at another table. Grunting and poking at the inside of his cheek with his tongue, he found Hyunjin's gaze again; the stare of those intimidating yet caring brown ones against his forcing a sensible response past his lips. "Yeah, I want to talk about it sometimes, but I don't care. I love him, and he loves me, and that's what matters."

Sighing and shrugging his shoulders with a lift of his eyebrows, Hyunjin leaned back in his seat, deciding to just stop with the discussion for the time being. "Okay then," he said calmly, raising a hand to make a waiter aware of their completion. "I just hope that he really appreciates the gem he has here, hm? And I know that this isn't a date, so don't think that I'm making a move or anything. Just know that I'm always open to hang out with you like this, okay? If you can't do it with your boyfriend, at least you cam do it with a friend on weekends. It's healthy, going out once in a while."

Nodding and chewing on his lower lip in attempt to rid the slight blush growing along his cheeks, Felix spread a small smile, raising his thumb with his response. "Yeah, thank you. That means a lot... Seungmin isn't usually willing to hang out in the night time, so yeah... thanks."

"Of course, Lix. And thank you for accepting on such a short notice when we're only just getting to know each other..."

-

⇒ Levantar Apartments
9:30pm

Coughing and crying into the toilet bowl at the lingering sting in his throat that only strengthened as more bile threatened to run up his gullet at the absence of any remainder from his earlier dinner, Felix mumbled a chorus of swears, the tears sliding down to the corner of his mouth making the experience all the more upsetting.

He shook his head continuously before standing to head for the sink, eyes pausing on a stare at the unopened pregnancy test he had managed to purchase earlier that day. He thought twice before running his thumb over it, hesitance and anxiety weakening his knees as he picked up the labeled box, sighing and closing his eyes pleadingly.

"Just do it. Just to make sure that you're the crazy one. Your diet is what's not good..." Felix spoke in third person as he strolled back over to the toilet bowl, letting a few more tears drop over his freckles before lowering the
hem of his joggers. Squinting while his small fingers struggled their way to open the thin box, he dashed the packaging to some side of the tiled floor, lowering his boxers and sighing to let some urine flow freely onto the testing stick.

Finishing up and making his way back to the sink, he rested the test against the marble with shaky hands, sweaty palms struggling to maintain a firm enough grip on the edge where he leaned nervously, lower lip in bondage between his teeth, and head hurting at the excruciating levels of anxiety and regret colonizing his subconsciousness.

His heart seemed to beat in the pattern of a drumroll, and his brain, the part that kept those logical decisions so secluded, could only scream and torment his already remorseful, naive way of thinking. He let a few more drops of salty water run down his face, legs ready to give out at the tense contradiction between their persistence to remain standing, and the internal desire to just dissolve or fall beneath as if none of that ever happened.

But they still decided to stand there, determined with the conclusion that their only other movement would be either falling from the overwhelmed feeling of joy and gratefulness if the test did come out as negative, or from doubt, disbelief, and even deeper regret if the outcome was really to fall in line with the symptoms of drowsiness and morning sickness that Felix had been experiencing for a troubling amount of days.

Yet, neither was the reason for the shifting of the blonde's feet towards his living room, as a banging against his door was seemingly even more important and nerve wrecking than the possible life-changing out-turn of the secret pregnancy test.

Shaking the mouthful of listerine he had managed to take in before gliding swiftly to the repetitive sounds at his door, Felix shakily scurried to the kitchen to spit out the liquid as well as splash a handful of water over his face before attending to the knocking, a soft, welcoming, yet perplexed smile spread on his face.

"Who is- Chan? What're you doing here?"

"Felix fucking finally." Chan groaned as he sped past the boy and into the more private space, face dull and hinting clear bits of disappointment. "Where the fuck were you? And why didn't you answer my text?"

"Wait, I'm confused... Where was I when? And I didn't see any text."

Biting on the inside of his cheek and plopping down on the sofa, Chan muttered another swear, veins boiling with irritation at the assumption that his boyfriend was just playing dumb in such a seemingly serious situation. "What the fuck do you mean where were you when? I came to see you earlier, and I kept fucking knocking until a neighbor came out, Felix. Another fucking person almost recognized me here."

"Well Chan I'm sorry I didn't know you were coming tonight but you don't have to be a dick about it." Felix coated his own tone with an attitude to match that of the older's, Chan's unjustifiable approach mixed with his own frustration from earlier that night ridding all thoughts to just sit down and allow the other to give his own side of the misunderstanding. "I didn't see any damn text, Chan. And just because you're my boyfriend, it doesn't mean that you can just come to my place and cuss me out. Hell fucking no. You don't spend day times with me to know how stressful my day fucking was, Chan. You don't know half of the shit I go through, so as much as I understand your reasoning, you don't have a right to get on with me like that."

Scoffing and rolling his eyes in his seat, Chan looked up at the smaller boy before him, shaking his head at the sight of those smaller arms folded against Felix's chest. "Look, okay. I understand what you're saying, but you need to be more careful. Now please calm down, and let's speak properly." He sighed before continuing, tapping the empty spot on the couch for Felix to sit as well. "Can you at least tell me where you were earlier?"

Nodding and sighing before complying, Felix leaned his head against Chan's shoulder, shivering when the latter's arm snaked around his lower back. "I was out with a friend. He offered to take me to a restaurant tonight because he noticed how stressed I was when I visited my other, closer friend who happened to not be home, so I accepted. I didn't expect you to come over tonight because we both know I don't work on Saturdays."

"A friend?" Chan hummed, stroking the younger's back and furrowing his brows in question. "You didn't tell him about us, right?"

"No, I didn't. All I said was that I have a boyfriend, you know, so that he wouldn't try anything. But I didn't say anything else..."

"Hm. Okay then," Chan shrugged nonchalantly, a small smirk replacing the stiff setting on his lips. He glanced over to the smaller blonde at his side, finding and sliding his hand up the hem of Felix's T-shirt. "But what do you say I do my own part in helping you de-stress, hm?"

Shuddering at the kitten licks and kisses starting from his jawline down to his neck, Felix shook his head at the gestures, frowning at the other's befuddled and slightly hurt expression resulting from his decline. "I- not now, Chan. I'm not in the mood..."

"Did I do or say something wrong?" The older asked softly, turning and cupping Felix's cheek with his free hand, genuine concern fueling his actions. "Or did I hurt you the first time? You can tell me, Lix-"

"No, Chan. I'm just not in the mood right now..."

"Okay well- well what do you want to do tonight?"

Shrugging and lifting his tired body off of the sofa, Felix stretched with a yawn before turning to face the older again, face sombre and forcing his dreary efforts to seem unbothered into failure. "Channie I love you but, I kind of just wanna sleep early tonight. I'm sorry that you had to come all this way just for nothing, and I swear I'd tell you not to come if I saw your text in time."

Sighing and nodding in acceptance, Chan frowned lowly upon standing, scratching the back of his nape before speaking up. "Well can I at least use the bathroom before leaving? Wouldn't want to stop on the way just to pee..."

Felix only unthinkingly nodded and outstretched his arm towards the direction of the bathroom, mind too tired and overwhelmed with the task of finding some sort of relief to think straight and realize that such absentmindedness was not relief. That it was anything but relief. And that such occurrence could and would only ruin all possible chances of relief.

Only when his buttocks slammed against the cushions once more did his eyes shoot open at the memory of his untold secret exposed so effortlessly on the bathroom counter, the reality check strengthening his headache from before and forcing his lips away from each other in hope that the cold air in the room would at least help in formulating a believable, easily backed up lie on his tongue.

He quickly stood up from the sudden discomfort that the texture of the cushions merged into, hands shaking and breaths stuttering at the expected call of his name from a tone damp with confusion and suspicion.

"Felix? What is this?" Chan questioned skeptically as he walked out of the bathroom, steps slow and used pregnancy test gripped carefully in his hand. "What are you doing with a pregnancy test, and why does it read pregnant?"

Gulping thickly and even drawing blood from the inside of his cheeks due to the ruthless gnawing against the sensitive flesh before speaking, Felix toyed with his fingers at his front anxiously, the confirmation of his demise mixed with his boyfriend's unplanned knowledge of his lie ridding all possibilities of a sensible sentence to flow out of his mouth. "C-Channie, it's not what it looks like-"

"I don't fucking know what it looks like, Felix. Last time I checked, you were a normal guy, so I don't fucking know what a used, positive pregnancy test on your bathroom sink looks like." His lips sprayed spit as he spoke, free fist clenching furiously and eyes closing as if the short moment of darkness would calm his still unjustified rage. "Who's is this?"

"It's-"

"And don't lie to me. Don't lie, Felix. Was somebody over or something? Is it your friend's?"

"It's- It's mine, Channie."

┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ 〈 🎤 〉 ⋟ ┈ ┈ ┈