CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
et tu, brute?

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NADINE VIDAL WAS NUMB. Exhausted. Still in a struggling state of shock. Her entire body was leaden, shoulders drooping. And, because of this, a part of her wanted nothing more than to turn around, go back inside, crack open a bottle of wine and drink herself into oblivion. Sure, she'd wake up with yet another hangover, but didn't she deserve some indulgence after all she'd been through? Assassins and baby chimpanzees. Corpses and bruised ribs. Blackouts and supernovas. Bloody nose and bloody fists. The weight of the world may no longer have been on her shoulders, but the weight of this week was, and it was heavy enough. She just wanted—she just wanted to rest. She wanted it to all be over.

Despite all of this, though, she remained firmly in the car with Vanya. She may have been exhausted, yes, but she still had work to do. If she just curled up on Elliott's couch with a bottle of wine and a sleeve of crackers, she would do nothing but wallow until the FBI or DPD or Secret Service caught up with her. Whether they threw her behind bars or gunned her down for her supposed crimes didn't matter—when they got a hold of her, she was finished. At least here, she could do something before that happened (and it would happen. Nadine wasn't naïve enough to believe she could make it out of this). She could help Vanya, which had been her goal from day one.

She sat back in her seat, watching Vanya gun the engine. Before the car could set off, however, the door to the backseat opened. Her eyebrows lifted when Klaus slid inside.

"So, so, so..." he began, closing the door behind him, "Ben, huh? Gone forever. Isn't he?"

"What?" Nadine asked, turning in her seat to look at him.

Unlike Nadine, Vanya didn't flinch. "He traded his life for mine... while he saved the world in the process."

"Wait, Ben was here?" Nadine asked, shooting Klaus an accusatory look. "Was he who you were talking to the whole time? I thought you said ghosts couldn't time travel!"

Klaus's lips thinned. "That may not have been the complete truth."

Nadine crossed her arms. She'd only seen Ben in person once, the day Klaus had temporarily solidified him with his powers. But she did know that Ben had loved his siblings, and they'd loved him back. Five had asked if he had been with them for a reason—to ensure the entirety of their family was back together. Yet, Klaus had lied. He'd made Ben even more of a ghost than he really was, completely severing him from his family. And now... now he was gone?

"Vanya, what do you mean, Ben traded his life for yours?" Nadine asked, facing the front again.

Vanya took a deep breath. "When I was—when I was going off, it was Ben who managed to talk me down. I'm not sure how, but somehow, he... he got into my mind. With me. He told me it hurt him, but that it wasn't my fault. And then... then he ended up disappearing."

"Oh, God," Nadine breathed.

"He did it, though," Vanya said quietly. "He saved the world."

Guilt twinged through Nadine's stomach. She hadn't known how Vanya had managed to settle herself down, only that it had happened. She hadn't given Ben the credit he deserved. Because, despite his flaunting, it hadn't been Diego who had saved the world. Nor had it been Nadine, Klaus, or Allison.

It had been Ben Hargreeves.

That was the second time now that he'd saved her life. And, apparently, it would be the last.

"Pfft. Show-off," Klaus scoffed. Then, after a beat: "But did he... say anything about... me?" He tucked his hair behind his ear, hands trembling a little. Nadine realized he was more upset than he was letting on.

Vanya nodded. "He wanted me to tell you that he was too scared to go to the light. It wasn't you that made him stay."

Klaus processed this for a moment, mouth open, and then let out a rueful chuckle. "Oh, that little shit-heel. All these years, and I thought it was my fault that he didn't take his ticket to heaven."

Vanya gave him a sad smile, and then said, "Look, I'm sorry, but... you should get out, 'cause I need to—"

"Oh, no, I'm coming with," Klaus interrupted. "I can't let you and Nadine face the unknown by yourselves, right?"

As soon as he finished speaking, the car doors opened once more, and Allison and Diego slid in beside Klaus. Allison, who'd thrown a black shawl over her shoulders, chirped, "Got room for two more?"

"What about the Commission?" Vanya asked, taken aback by her siblings' sudden shift in perspective.

"Well, might as well do some good before we die horribly," said Diego. Nadine managed a laugh at that, raising an imaginary glass.

"Cheers, I'll drink to that."

"Whoo-hoo!" Klaus added, pumping his fists into the air.

The passenger door swung open, and Nadine turned to meet the smug eyes of Five. Utter astonishment flooded her. Five Hargreeves? Being selfless? What sort of parallel universe had she stumbled into?

Vanya was similarly astonished. "Five, you... you don't have to—"

"I know," said Five. "You owe me one, sis." He locked eyes with Nadine. "Children ride in the back."

"Oh, fuck you," said Nadine. There wasn't any venom behind the words. Five had actually drawn his head out of his ass and decided to help his sister. So, she didn't complain, just crawled into the trunk of the car (the only place with actual room) and tucked herself against the seat.

Vanya faced her siblings, gratitude shining in her eyes. "Guys, I don't know what to say."

Just then, the door to the trunk reopened, and Luther, who'd been the only member of the Academy missing, crawled in. The whole car rocked under his weight, moving side to side, and then, with a loud crunch, the back half sunk down.

As Luther closed the door behind him and settled in beside Nadine, he muttered, "Anyone makes a fat joke, and I'm outta here."

Vanya grinned, and then started the car for real, this time. As she pulled it out of park, the exhaust pipe ground against the road, letting loose a scraping that was nearly as bad as nails on a chalkboard. Fortunately, the car still worked.

Nadine pulled her knees up to her chest, looking from Luther to Diego, Allison to Klaus, Five to Vanya. It seemed that the Umbrella Academy was still a team, after all. Perhaps they were the blood of the covenant. None of them were biologically related, and yet, they'd all found each other.

She was glad. A team wasn't a team without all its members, after all.

THE DRIVE TO SISSY'S farm took a mostly uneventful half an hour. Sure, sitting in the trunk of a car with a man as burly as Luther (who took up the vast majority of the space) made the ride a little claustrophobic, but that was nothing to complain about. Because Luther and his siblings were here. Vanya and Nadine didn't need to go alone. And now here the Umbrella Academy was, off on a mission that would hopefully be easier than saving the world.

Well, that was what Nadine was hoping—though she supposed that was her first mistake. She'd hoped that when Five had returned for her a week ago, it meant she was going back to 2019. She'd hoped that she'd be able to save the world, back in 2019. She'd hoped, she'd hoped, she'd hoped—and yet, even after playing a part in saving the world, she'd always been let down. So, she really shouldn't have been surprised when they arrived at the farm.

A fierce snowstorm was raging over the area, blanketing everything in a cloud of white. Given that this was Texas and not Canada, there shouldn't have been snow in the first place, and the fact that it was only here that it was happening sent off extra alarm bells in Nadine's head. Especially when her eyes caught onto the barn. Above it was a mass of dark clouds, all of them coalescing together in an imitation of a twister. Lightning struck the roof of the barn, tendrils upon tendrils of forked white, and the snow burst from it in a whirlwind.

In the barn itself were flashes of pale blue light—the same light all of the Umbrella Academy emanated when they used their abilities. Nadine never figured out why having superpowers made things light blue; she'd just accepted it as another strange facet of being who she was.

The car rumbled over the snowy driveway, and Nadine pressed her face to the window, completely in awe. She'd never seen such power from anyone but Vanya, and even then, it had been nothing like this. It was beautiful, and it was terrifying. It was electric. It was horrible.

All of this, coming from a single young boy.

Vanya parked the car, and all of them slid out—Nadine and Luther a little awkwardly. As her feet sunk into the snow, Nadine immediately wished she'd thought to bring a jacket. It was freezing out here, and with every exhale, her breath misted into the air.

"You think whatever's going on inside is causing the cold front?" Diego asked.

"Well, the correlation is high," Five responded. Nadine wondered if his legs were cold. He was still wearing those idiotic little shorts of his.

"Yeah, I don't think this is normal Texas weather," she said, rubbing her arms.

The door to the barn flew open, and a woman burst her way out. She had blonde curls a lot like Nadine's, and skin about the same shade. She held out a shotgun, levelling it at the intruders. Undoubtedly, this was Sissy Cooper. But why the hell was she pointing a gun at their faces?

"Sissy! Sissy!" Vanya ran forward. Sissy cocked her shotgun, and old terror rattled through Nadine. She'd thought she'd gotten over her fear after what had happened with Elliott, but it seemed it couldn't be cured that easily.

"Get back!" Sissy ordered. "All of you, just get the hell back!"

Nadine, her breath constricting in her chest, obliged, hands raising in surrender. Allison glanced at her, then flung out a protective arm, attempting to shield her from the gun's reach.

Nadine didn't even have the breath to thank her.

"Sissy!" cried Vanya again. "Hey! Hey! What's wrong?"

Sissy hissed, "Carl."

"What did he do to you?"

"He's..." Sissy attempted to catch her breath, her chest heaving. "He's dead. Harlan tossed him aside like a rag doll, same way you sent those policemen flyin'. What did you do to him?"

Vanya lowered her arm. "No—"

"Vanya, what the hell did you do to my son?"

Nadine took another step back, pressing right up against the car. Please stop, she begged, as unwanted memories began to wash in. Please. She's not going to shoot you. She's not going to... you're going to be fine.

Diego, as usual, was unfazed. Fuck him, honestly. "We don't have time for this, Vanya."

Sissy aimed the gun at him. "Where do you think you're going, mister?"

"To help your son," Diego said. Nadine clenched her fists.

"Look, Sissy, I found my family," Vanya began. "These are my brothers and my sister. And this—" here, she gestured to Nadine, "—is my friend, Nadine. One of the best friends I've ever had."

Nadine's lips parted, and a strange, warm feeling settled into her stomach. As long as the gun was still pointed at her face, she was still frightened, but... well, somehow, what Vanya had said had alleviated a little bit of that. She managed to straighten up and lower her hands. Deep breaths, Nadine. It's all right.

Things got better when Sissy finally lowered the gun. "Were you lyin' to me the whole time?" she asked.

"Of course not." Vanya stepped forward. "Look, I didn't know who I was. But I do now. And we are not the monsters that they say we are. We did not kill the president. We are not terrorists. We're not here to hurt anyone."

"Then... who are you?"

"The only one who can help Harlan."

Now that a gun wasn't pointed at her face, Nadine felt a lot more confident. Rolling her shoulders, she took a step forward, raising her chin so as to accurately meet Sissy's gaze. "We're the Umbrella Academy," she said. "We won't let you down."

Sissy pursed her lips, and then nodded. "All right," she said. There was a Southern drawl to her voice, another thing that separated her from Nadine. Vanya had said that Sissy reminded her of Nadine, but other than the few similarities in appearance, they were nothing alike. Sissy was shorter, for one, and not as brawny. She was Texan, while Nadine was French. She had a child, while Nadine had yet to even get married.

Still, there was something about her—a spark in her eye, even now. Nadine could see why Vanya loved her.

Sissy led them to the barn. Vanya immediately shoved the door open, bursting inside. When Nadine shouldered her way after her, she was met with the musty smell of hay bales and manure—along with the staticky sensation of someone using their abilities. It didn't take long to find the source. There, by one of the barn's walls, was a whirling vortex chased with blue and gold. In its interior was a boy floating in midair. His eyes were drooping, and his arms lay at his sides as his body seized with power.

"Harlan?" Vanya cried out, stumbling up to the cyclone. "Harlan, it's Vanya!"

Harlan didn't respond. He didn't seem to be able to hear her. As the hairs on the back of Nadine's neck rose, Vanya continued, "Look, Harlan, I know you're really scared, but I can help you. I need you to listen to me, okay? Can you do that?"

When Harlan still didn't respond, Vanya's eyes flashed electric blue. It was an unnatural sight, yet beautiful, even if it added to the electricity coursing through Nadine's skin. Taking in a deep breath, Vanya stepped into the whirlwind of energy, slowly but surely inching her way towards the boy.

"Careful," Five warned, shrinking away from the vortex.

"Harlan?" Vanya called. "I don't know if you can hear me..."

"Uh... guys?"

As Vanya kept up her attempts to get to Harlan, Klaus's voice rang through the barn. Nadine turned, finding that he'd migrated to the back door. He stared out onto the expansive field.

"What is it?" she asked, reluctantly stepping away from Vanya to join him. The others did as well, peering into the distance.

At first, Nadine didn't know what she was looking for, but then she spotted them. Near the edge of the field were two figures, staring back at the farm. Both of them women, one had a head of white curls, a black hat, and one hand clutching a briefcase. And the other... Nadine took in a breath.

The other was Lila.

"Ah, shit," Diego swore.

"What, who are they?" Klaus asked.

"One's The Handler," Five explained, "the other's Diego's girlfriend."

"Lila. That's my ex-girlfriend," Diego clarified.

Nadine whirled to face him. "She really is a part of the Commission?"

She'd thought Five had no idea what he was talking about...

"Oh, yeah," said Diego, crossing his arms. "She's the one who headhunted me in the first place. You know, after she drugged and kidnapped me."

Oh, fuck. Nadine had been so convinced that Lila was harmless, but here was living proof that she'd been wrong. Lila was with The Handler, the head of the Commission. The one that... Herb's voice came into her mind. The one that had wanted her alive.

Where had she heard that name before?

"Well, they both look angry," Luther pointed out.

"Yeah."

"Well, our brother has that effect on people," said Allison.

"I'm gonna go find out what they want," said Five. "You guys stay here with Vanya and the kid."

"I'm coming with you, too," said Diego, stepping forward. "Come on."

"Wait." Nadine chased after them, casting an uneasy glance back at Vanya. She was still trying to speak to Harlan, though it was obvious she wasn't making much progress. "Let me come, too. The Handler... Herb said she wanted me alive. I want to know why. And I want to know why she seems so... so familiar. Like I've seen her before."

As much as she didn't want to leave Vanya, she knew that facing down Lila and this mystery woman was something she needed to do. She still had so many questions, and she was sick of not knowing their answers.

"All right," said Five. Nadine was surprised he didn't argue. "You're in, too. Come on."

With one final look at Vanya, Nadine exited the barn, following Five and Diego as they set off down the field. It had gotten a little warmer since they'd been inside, but shivers still ran down her spine. Though that may have very well been from the nervous anticipation that came with approaching more Commission goons.

When she could clearly see The Handler's face, her brain tugged at a memory. She'd seen her before, not just heard her name. She had. But... where?

Instead of greeting them, The Handler spoke to Lila. "I love the smell of that fresh country air, don't you, darling?"

"Makes me want to vomit," Lila replied sourly. She was a far cry from the eccentric woman Nadine had made peanut butter and jam sandwiches with.

"What do you want?" Five asked, cutting to the chase.

"To watch you suffer," said Lila.

"What about me?" asked Diego. Lila looked at him like he was shit under her shoe.

"You're not even worth my wrath."

"Easy," The Handler tutted. Nadine clenched her fists. "We're here on official business. But before we get to all of that, there's someone you two haven't introduced."

Nadine let out a growl and took a step forward. "Who are you?" she asked. "Why did you—Herb said you requested that I be kept alive. Why?"

"Well, now, I'm a little hurt." The Handler settled a hand over her chest. "You really don't remember me, Nadine Vidal? It hasn't been that long, has it?" she looked her up and down. "Of course, you were quite a lot smaller, then. What happened to that little doll I met back in 1996?"

1996... Nadine swore the air had been punched out of her lungs. 1996.

A memory unlocked in her; a memory she'd forgotten she'd even had. She'd been seven years old, then, and who remembered much of those years? The years when you were losing teeth and wearing light-up shoes and the only problems you possessed were about who had the coolest rock collection on the playground?

The first ten years of Nadine's life had been a blur, with only the most defining moments—like the first time she'd used her powers—sprinkled in. But now, a floodgate swung open. In it came a wave.

She was seven years old, and Mama and Papa weren't home. There was a knock on the door, and Nadine thought it was them, but when she opened it, there was instead a woman with white curls like these, perfect cherry lipstick, and a cigarette in one hand. She spoke fluent French, her voice a purr as she asked Nadine about her abilities. As she told her she was a very special girl.

Then she'd left. But, clear as a bell, her final words rang in Nadine's mind.

"Appelez-moi The Handler."

Call me The Handler.

That was where she'd heard the name before. As a stick-thin seven-year-old, with barrettes in her hair and Band-Aids on her elbow. It had been such a strange interaction, yet Nadine had managed to forget about it—too much had happened for that to even be considered noteworthy.

She stepped back, desperately grasping for words. "You—you were the one who—"

"I can tell by your expression that you remember me, now," said The Handler, folding her hands neatly in front of her. "Good. It would've been a pity if you'd forgotten. And to answer your earlier question, poppet, I never wanted you dead. Not even when I first gave the order to kill you. I was quite disappointed when you turned out to be an anomaly. I knew what the Commission said about people like you. So, I went to Hazel and Cha-Cha personally, and sent them to 2007. I didn't tell them about your abilities or your age. Eighteen. You really could've been younger. It probably would've made it easier on them. But the truth is, I wanted to give you a fighting chance."

"What are you talking about?" Diego growled, stepping in front of Nadine. This was the second time in the last twenty minutes that a member of the Umbrella Academy had tried to protect her. Yet again, she didn't have the energy to be grateful.

"Patience," The Handler chided. "I'm getting there." She continued cheerfully, ignoring the growing horror in Nadine's expression. "The truth is, Nadine, I knew right away that you hadn't died. Do you think I didn't notice? Poppet, I did from day one. Then you got yourself involved with the Umbrella Academy, and, well... everyone knew you'd survived. And when you somehow managed to avoid the end of the world, I knew I wanted to speak to you again. Face-to-face."

Nadine couldn't breathe. Why couldn't she fucking breathe?

"I didn't kill you because I wanted you to be my daughter," The Handler finished. "When you were seven years old, I came to 1996 to see how easy acquiring you would be. You would've been younger, but this little one right here—" she smiled at Lila, who just huffed and crossed her arms, "—wanted a sister her own age. But anyway, I was fully planning on taking you in, until that pesky little light indicated you were an anomaly. It was all so inconvenient. You could've had a better life with me in the Commission. You wouldn't have had to deal with your witch of a mother, who never wanted you to use your powers. With me, your powers could've been nurtured to their fullest strength! But, alas. Some things don't turn out the way we plan."

Nadine's heart was about to burst out of her chest. Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.

"It is nice to see you now, dear," said The Handler. "Even if you are with these turkeys."

Five clenched his jaw, glancing at Nadine. Because she was still unable to say anything, her brain struggling to process all the information she'd just been fed—she had been set up to survive, she could've been kidnapped as a child, The Handler wanted her powers—Five spoke for her. "You covered it up. Before 2019, when Nadine got involved with us. You covered up that she was alive and told the rest of the Commission she was dead."

The Handler reached forward, tapping him on the nose. "Correct," she said. "It wasn't easy, let me tell you, but I am good at my work. I managed it."

Five seemed to have more questions about this (while Diego just gaped at Nadine, bewildered) but he seemed to sense something else building. "So, is that what you came here for? To talk to Nadine?"

"Of course not," The Handler responded. "Didn't you hear what I said? I have official business here. That Nadine came to see me was just a delightful little coincidence." She smiled, showing perfect teeth, and said, "As the head of the Commission, I have decided to eliminate the criminals responsible for the assassination of the former board of directors."

"Yeah, right," Diego scoffed. Nadine rubbed her eyes with the heel of her hand, forcing air into her lungs. "We didn't kill the board."

Five lifted an arm. "Uh, actually, Diego, that's not entirely accurate."

"You didn't tell them," The Handler said, surprised. "Oh, Five."

"Five, what the hell did you do?" Diego snapped.

"What I had to to get my family home," Five responded. Nadine's mind suddenly flickered to an image of a bloodstained Five, shambling into Elliott's house with a briefcase. Oh, fuck. Her eyes drooped. That was it. He'd committed a massacre for the briefcase. "Until somebody reneged on our deal."

"Somebody wouldn't have reneged on the deal if somebody could've met a simple deadline," said The Handler, cocking her head at him. "Alas."

"That was the opposite of a simple deadline," Nadine spat, finally able to summon words again. "Especially when you—" she gestured to Lila, "—kidnapped Diego to prevent him from meeting it on time, and you—" she glared at The Handler, "—sent the Swedes after Allison to keep her from making it."

"Nadine's right," said Five, as if those words pained him. "You set me up to fail."

"You set yourself up to fail, friend. You and your brothers and sisters. Kinda the running theme of your little life, isn't it?" she chuckled.

"Dude, I can't believe you killed the board of directors," Diego said to Five. "You have no idea how messed up the Commission is right now."

"Messed up?" The Handler blinked. "Who's saying that?"

"Everybody. Christ, even the janitors think it's going to shit."

"That's not all he killed," Lila butt in.

"What are you talking about?" Five asked.

"Don't play dumb, you prepubescent piece of shit."

"Enough." The Handler set her briefcase on the ground. "The point is, all of you are going to die today. Hmm?"

"What, you don't want me alive anymore?" Nadine growled. "I've served my purpose to you?"

"Your purpose, Nadine," The Handler began, "was nothing more than a reunion. That was all that was keeping you alive. Now..." she clicked her tongue. "Now, I can see that I wasted my time on you. So, yes, you're going to die today. You and the rest of your pathetic little Academy."

"Oh," said Diego. "Well, I don't like your chances. Eight of us, two of you."

Nadine furrowed her brow. Eight?

"You know, you're right," said The Handler. "Let's change that."

Then she snapped her fingers, and the innocent patch of grass they were all standing on turned into a battlefield. 

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