a/n: i'm going to be uploading the rest of paradise found, expect lots of updates<3

As Namjoon had predicted, it hadn't taken long for Yoongi to become paranoid.

Their routine had not changed. Nothing had changed, yet, Yoongi couldn't help but get jumpy every time Hoseok approached him in public. At school, if Hoseok so much as leaned against the lockers, Yoongi would jump, and every touch— no matter how friendly, had Yoongi flinching. It hurt Yoongi that he was acting this way, but what hurt more was that Hoseok never looked angry or upset. Hoseok would continue whatever he was doing without missing a beat, steering conversations into different directions, dispelling the tension that threatened them every time Yoongi brusquely interrupted their flow with his jitteriness.

Yoongi didn't deserve someone like Hoseok, and he knew it. How could Hoseok be so patient with him? How could Hoseok pretend to understand and accept that Yoongi couldn't be the person he was in public, as he was when they were by themselves? How could Hoseok just accept that proposition from Yoongi and never once get mad that Yoongi would publicly reject him or keep him at arm's length? Yoongi felt awful, more so because Hoseok deserved better. Hoseok was capable of having someone better, yet, he continuously chose to stay with Yoongi.

The only person apart from Namjoon who knew of their circumstances was Isla, and she'd done well in keeping what Yoongi had confessed a secret. She'd give them pointed glances and make inside jokes only Yoongi and Hoseok would understand, but she kept her word, and for that, Yoongi was grateful. But nothing compared to when Yoongi and Hoseok were by themselves.

"I don't know how you don't hate me yet."

Yoongi leaned against Hoseok's shoulder as they cuddled together and watched a movie. The door was closed, completely locked, so that Yoongi could be comfortable. While they were at Hoseok's house, and it wouldn't necessarily be a problem if the rest of the Jungs found out, Yoongi only felt safe knowing that right now, he was in control of the situation. It was almost February now, and Yoongi had only gotten closer to Hoseok, a feat he'd never thought could become possible.

"Why would I hate you?"

Yoongi shrugged, shifting himself closer to Hoseok. "I know you've seen how I react when we're out in public. Doesn't it hurt? I feel like I'm not appreciating you enough."

"You're appreciating me plenty, Gi," Hoseok assured, squeezing Yoongi's shoulders. "Being together isn't about making it known to the world that we're together." Hoseok paused. "Not that we're together, together, but you get what I mean. I'll wait for you. I've waited years already, right? I can wait a bit more for you."

Yoongi frowned. "That's what makes me feel bad. You shouldn't have to wait for someone. You really do deserve better."

"I don't want better, Yoongi," Hoseok said, pausing the movie. "I want you. I want to be with you. You could bring me the most perfect man in the world, and I would still choose you. I will repeat it as many times as I need to because it's true."

"Why?"

"You may not think you're good now," Hoseok said, looking at Yoongi. "But getting comfortable with your sexuality, all the baggage that comes from it, it's all a part of your growth. Just because you're not better right now doesn't mean you won't be in the future. You've gotten past denying your feelings and accepted that you aren't what your parents wanted you to be— what Texas wants you to be. That's more than most people I know. Makes me feel like I intervened at the right time. I don't know what I would have done with myself if you had figured out you loved me and told your parents, and because of it, they sent you away."

Every day, Hoseok soothed Yoongi's worries.

Yoongi's heart fluttered at Hoseok's words. Coming from a voice so quiet, so gentle, holding so much love and affection for Yoongi, he knew that right now, everything had to be okay. Someday, they would be perfectly fine. Maybe not tonight or tomorrow. Maybe not even a month from now. But eventually, they would be. It didn't stop the apprehension that Yoongi felt every time he was in public, but it did help him feel better about all the scenes he could control.

He pressed a soft kiss to Hoseok's lips. Hoseok smiled into the kiss, cupping Yoongi's cheeks as delicately as he could. When they pulled away, Hoseok began peppering kisses all over Yoongi's face, causing the latter to burst into laughter. Moments like this, Yoongi would come to find to be sacred. It was moments like these that had Yoongi forgetting how terrible his outside circumstances were. Here, in Hoseok's arms, enjoying the beauty of Hoseok's company, he could be anyone and anything. Here, he was safe.

"I still don't know what I did to deserve you," Yoongi whispered, resting his head back on Hoseok's shoulders. "I don't think I will ever know. I'm just glad that you're with me, Hoba. I love you."

"I love you most."

"You can't just say that," Yoongi mumbled, smiling softly. "You can't love me the most."

"Why not?"

"It's not possible to measure how much we love each other," Yoongi said, earning a roll of eyes. "What? It's true! For all I know, you could be lying."

Hoseok scoffed. "I've been nothing but honest with you. Do you remember when I told you that I loved you for the first time? You thought I was kidding. Shit hurt like a bitch. You thought I was talking about someone else, even when I'd said your name."

"Okay, in my defense," Yoongi trailed off, shoulders slumping. "I have no defense. I just didn't think you actually meant it towards me. I must have sounded like an idiot."

"Yeah," Hoseok echoed, receiving a dirty look from Yoongi. "What? It's true. Imagine if you had figured out what I was saying was true. What would you have done then? We were holding hands by that point. We almost kissed then too."

What would Yoongi have done?

In all honesty, he would have run away like the coward that he was. He would shut out Hoseok and spend his time wallowing in his feelings, and then everything that Hoseko had implied could have happened would have. He probably wouldn't even be in Hoseok's arms. He'd be spending his days at the conversion therapy camp, trying to change himself for the better so that he could be in his parent's good graces. Maybe there had been a reason as to why nothing happened between them on that day.

"You think God meant for us to end up here?" Yoongi asked. Hoseok gave a knowing look.

"I think so," Hoseok said. "I don't believe in that stuff anymore, but everything does happen for a reason. When I used to believe in that stuff, I know I thought it was meant to be. I mean, my feelings for you haven't changed ever. I wasn't interested in girls growing up. I only wanted to hang out with you. I remember feeling upset and jealous when I saw you with other kids, especially girls, because I knew how your parents were then, and they're more insufferable now. But, you always came back to me. I'd say I've loved you my entire life. Does that count for something?"

Yoongi quickly kissed Hoseok's cheek. "It counts for everything. I'm sorry for making you wait so long. I'm here now, and when we finally leave this place, we can be fully together."

"That reminds me, did you ever send the change to Early Decision to BC?" Hoseok asked. Yoongi shook his head. "Are you going to risk it then?"

"I changed to Early Decision for Northeastern," Yoongi admitted, noticing the way Hoseok's expression quickly lit up. "I remembered you telling me that there was a high chance that even with my parents making enough money to pay, I could get a scholarship, so I decided to bet on that chance if I were to get in. If I don't get in, then it's fine; it'll save me from the inevitable scream fest I'm going to have with my parents."

"I'll always be here for you," Hoseok said, squeezing Yoongi's shoulders once more. "How are things with your parents? Have they been bugging you about Jess?"

Yoongi frowned. "They have. It's annoying. Jess plays along with them too. You know they started coming over after Sunday church? I went one time, Seok, one time, and now they have me going again."

Jess had quickly become a thorn on Yoongi's side. Despite them not communicating much now, thanks to Namjoon's suggestion, Jess had still managed to keep a firm role in the Min family dynamics. His parents had upgraded into calling Jess a "good, Christian, Southern girl," someone that Yoongi "ought to marry." Yoongi was able to keep the same routine he held despite that, but he couldn't shake off Jess more than he could shake off his parents. Thankfully, because Jess's girlfriend didn't live around them, there was no more need for double dates, though Jess would insist on trying to hang out with them at any chance she could get.

"You could always sleep over," Hoseok suggested, knowing that the suggestion was useless. "At least going to church is reminding you about who you are, right?"

That it was, and it was becoming aggravating.

Somehow, the priests always managed to squeeze in "unnatural" talks during their sermons, and when that would happen, Yoongi's parents would glance at him pointedly, nodding their heads in agreeance, along with the rest of Jess's family, including Jess herself, who seemed more enthusiastic than any of them combined. It was a feat that weirded Yoongi out, but what more could Jess do if her family was full of people who hated who she was? After, when they'd grab breakfast, they always talked about the sermons, Yoongi's parents always going back to the "unnatural," and Jess would very loudly and very pointedly proclaim what she felt towards them— complete and utter hatred.

"Honestly, if we didn't know she was lesbian, I would have thought her to be a raging homophobe," Hoseok muttered, sighing softly as Yoongi told him the works. "Definitely be careful with that. You're not hanging out with her, though. That's always a plus. I'm sorry, Yoongi."

"What for?"

"Well, she's almost like your first gay friend apart from the rest of us," Hoseok explained. "I know it seems silly, but instead of encouraging the friendship, Joon and I are both iffy about it."

"You have reasons to," Yoongi retorted. "We all do. She's still helpful. Every time I go out, they don't ask me— they just assume I am with her. Not that I say anything to them, obviously, but if they can believe that I can still be their son, then that's good enough for me."

Hoseok grimaced. "You are their son, Yoongi, whether they want you to be or not. Biologically, you will always be theirs."

"I've gone my whole life wanting to be the son that they're proud of, Hoseok," Yoongi replied sullenly. "I can at least give them this before I completely destroy their lives. This is nice. Us is nice, but to my parents, it'll be their worst nightmare. Can you blame me for wanting to desperately keep them happy?"

Hoseok couldn't.

It wasn't like he hadn't done the same thing years ago.

"I just don't want you to be hurt if they do their worst to you," Hoseok mumbled, holding Yoongi closer. "My dad left after he saw I wasn't fixed. My mom still feels guilty to this day over what she put Isla and me through. I still go to therapy because of what happened. I've had years to get used to my way of life, Gi. The stress, the bullying, anything you can think of, I've been getting through with it. If your parents find out, the rest of the world will too. They'll throw every slur in the book at you, do the same shit they do to me, accuse you of anything they can think of. I don't want that for you."

Yoongi shook his head. "It's not a matter of if, Hoseok. It's when."

"When," Hoseok agreed. "When they do. I'm really hoping that it isn't until we're out of here."

"Yeah," Yoongi whispered. "Me too."

As luck would have it, those would be Yoongi's famous last words regarding the matter. 

—🏝 —

Valentine's Day had been the best day of Yoongi's life, and it had been the second time they had almost been discovered.

Yoongi hadn't been thinking about doing anything in particular. He hadn't even expected Hoseok to do anything. They'd talked as normal, behaved like there was nothing between them, and when Hoseok suggested that they go on a drive early in the morning, Yoongi hadn't thought anything of it. Early in the morning turned out to become noon as Yoongi's parents forced him to go to church and hang out with Jess, who, after hardly making passes at him before, was now fully going at it, as if she was trying to make it clear that they were something that they weren't. Yoongi had stopped her, getting slightly uncomfortable, while his parents only looked at him in disapproval at Yoongi for maintaining distance.

"Are you doing anything with Jess today?" his mother asked. "It's Valentine's Day."

Yoongi looked at her, confused. "Why would I?"

That caused tension to envelop all of them. Jess had managed to laugh it off, but it was clear that she was embarrassed, and from then, she'd kept her hands to herself. After they were done, not a word was uttered between the families, and Yoongi was driven home, only for Yoongi to change and walk out the door, not even breathing goodbye to his parents, who only watched him leave, discontent in their expressions. Because that expression was one Yoongi had seen more often than not, he didn't think anything of it.

When Yoongi opened the door to Hoseok's truck, he was met with the most blinding of smiles. Yoongi began his apology tour before even climbing into the seat, and once the door was fully closed, Hoseok silenced him with a quick kiss on the lips. Yoongi stopped speaking, stunned at Hoseok's sudden act of affection, and thanked God internally that Hoseok's windows were tinted and no one was driving near them.

"Happy Valentine's Day, beautiful," Hoseok said brightly, stealing another kiss from Yoongi's lips. "We have lots to do today, and we're already behind."

"Yeah, well," Yoongi scoffed, blushing softly. "I was dragged to church and then breakfast. It was so weird today."

Hoseok arched an eyebrow, eyes meeting Yoongi's briefly before going back to the road. Yoongi's hand found Hoseok's empty one, and he intertwined their hands together, a custom that Yoongi knew he would never stop doing as long as he could keep it.

"Tell me."

Yoongi frowned. "Jess was being a bit too touchy today. I don't know why but I told her to stop. And then my mom asked if I was doing anything with Jess today, and I didn't really know why until she said it was Valentine's Day, but what does that have to do with me hanging out with Jess? We're not together."

"That's weird," Hoseok agreed, humming lowly. "I would ask her what she's doing. You two haven't hung out in a while, except on the mandatory days. I don't appreciate her also laying her hands on you. Fortunately, not even Jess can deter my mood today."

Yoongi made a mental note to check up with Jess later. His lips quirked up, and he turned to look at Hoseok, saying, "What has you in such a good mood?"

"Oh, you know, nothing much," Hoseok breezed, lightly squeezing Yoongi's hand. "Just Valentine's Day with the boy I love."

"I didn't get you anything," Yoongi said, a pout dipping into the corners of his mouth. "Is that okay?"

"Oh yeah," Hoseok dismissed. "You're here with me. That's all I need."

Yoongi casually did not mention the fact that the reason why he didn't have a Valentine's Day gift was that in four days, it would be Hoseok's eighteenth birthday, and he had spent a considerable amount of money getting Hoseok a gold and silver charm bracelet with his name engraved on it.

"I asked my mom if I could go back to our lake home, and surprisingly she said yes," Hoseok said. "I was actually there yesterday, and now I'm taking you. Please don't tell me no; we're already off schedule."

Yoongi giggled. "I'll go wherever you want me to."

"Good," Hoseok said, beaming widely. "I would have had to resort to unethical means to get you to come with me if that wasn't the case."

"Oh?"

"I'd kidnap you, obviously," Hoseok said, eliciting more giggles from Yoongi. "What? I'll have you know I'm a very good kidnapper."

"I don't think it counts as kidnapping if I willingly got into the car with you," Yoongi mused.

"Ah, but that's where you're wrong," Hoseok countered wryly. "A lot of people get kidnapped thinking that they're willingly getting into the kidnapper's car."

"Whatever will I do?" Yoongi gasped dramatically, bursting into laughter. "I've been betrayed by my love."

"Guess you're stuck with me forever," Hoseok replied cheekily, kissing Yoongi's hand softly. "I have no intentions of ever letting you go."

"I don't think I'll ever want you to."

And Yoongi, that was the truth.

No one could ever compare to Hoseok Jung.

No one would ever compare to Hoseok Jung.

—🏝 —

Yoongi didn't know what he'd been expecting when they'd arrived at Hoseok's lake home, but it definitely wasn't for it to be completely decked with romance from the inside. The breath left his lungs as Hoseok took off the blindfold, his eyes already welling with tears as he looked around, left completely speechless at the grand gesture Hoseok had made.

A bouquet of roses lay on the table. Next to it was the biggest bear Yoongi had ever seen— the kind that all of the girls fawned over and wished that their boyfriends would give them. He could smell the sweet scent of food coming from the kitchen, and although he had eaten not so long ago, his mouth salivated at the heavenly smells. He felt himself fall into Hoseok's arms, hugging him tightly. The only words that came out of his mouth were thank you, and Hoseok only smiled, holding Yoongi tighter as if one gust of wind would break them away from each other.

Yoongi hadn't thought it would have been possible for him to fall more for Hoseok, but as it turned out, his heart had a lot more space for emotions— at least for Hoseok, he did. Hoseok was perfect. Perfect, perfect, perfect. No matter how many times he would chant it in his head, Yoongi couldn't help but commit it to memory over and over. He must have done something right in his previous life to have someone so sweet, so caring, so patient like Hoseok.

Now, he really felt bad that he hadn't gotten anything for Hoseok.

Hoseok gently led Yoongi to the table, picking out a box that Yoongi hadn't seen at first glance. He opened the box, revealing a gold necklace that Yoongi knew must have cost Hoseok a couple of hundred because of how intricate and beautiful the designs seemed to be on it. The design itself was of a crescent moon, tiny diamonds incrusted into it, and in the middle, there was a golden rose adorned so beautifully in red and gold. If Yoongi had been able to reel in his tears before, there was nothing stopping them now from flowing.

"You didn't have to," Yoongi said, his voice sounding muffled. Hoseok laughed quietly, taking out the necklace from the box. "You must have spent a fortune on it."

Hoseok shrugged. "A couple of hundred is nothing compared to what I wish I could give you."

He unclasped the necklace and, with Yoongi's permission, adorned it over Yoongi's neck, smiling to himself while doing so. Yoongi couldn't see how the necklace looked on him, but with the way Hoseok looked at him, Yoongi knew it looked perfect against his skin. Like it was meant to be for it to be placed on Yoongi.

"I take it you like it?"

Yoongi's lips curled into the brightest of smiles, "I love it, Hoseok. Thank you. You're making me look like shit for not getting you anything."

"I'm sure you can make it up to me in the future," Hoseok teased, wrapping his arms around Yoongi's waist. "I can't wait to show you off in the future. Everyone will be jealous of me, Yoongi, because I'll have the prettiest human in existence by my side."

"You're cheesy."

Hoseok planted a soft kiss on Yoongi's lips. "When you're officially mine, I'll be worse."

"You're silly," Yoongi mumbled, draping his arms over Hoseok's shoulders. "I'm already yours. I always have been."

Saying that out loud felt like nothing but the truth. For the first time in Yoongi's life, Yoongi felt absolute certainty over his words. No doubt leaked into his mind at the words he'd professed to Hoseok, and they only seemed to fortify as Hoseok's eyes shone with love, the younger leaning in to capture Yoongi's lips in another sweet kiss. Yoongi's heart was hammering in his chest, a feat only Hoseok seemed to bring out of him, and he kissed back with just as much passion, letting Hoseok know that all Yoongi had said was the truth.

As cheesy as it may have sounded, it had Yoongi thinking. He'd spent his time wallowing over what his parents could say about him, and Hoseok had been patient for months now, waiting for Yoongi to finally be comfortable enough to take their relationship to the next level. In retrospect, it was silly for Yoongi not to have already made things official with Hoseok, especially when they had already confessed to each other. They were essentially dating without using the term. Yoongi knew he didn't want anyone else, and he knew that Hoseok was incapable of even thinking about wanting anyone else.

What did it matter that the world wouldn't want them to be together?

Sure, there would be endless teasing coming from both ends, but Yoongi was more than prepared to handle it. Even if they didn't come out and tell anyone about their relationship, they could still be together. They were together— Hoseok had just never officially asked Yoongi out. Partly because Yoongi had told him, he wanted to come to terms with his sexuality, but strangely enough, Yoongi finally felt ready. Ready was relative. Yoongi knew he would never be ready for the consequences that would come with making everything official with Hoseok. He was finally ready to call Hoseok more than a friend. Finally comfortable with the fact that Hoseok would be his first real relationship.

The images of the life that he would have wanted to lead for his parents flashed in his mind, but at that moment, in Hoseok's arms, Yoongi didn't care. Yoongi felt safe in Hoseok's arms. Yoongi wanted to be in Hoseok's arms, and maybe he'd always wanted to. It was why he was never interested in anyone else. From the start, Hoseok Jung held his heart. He had never been given the chance to explore things with anyone else because Hoseok had already taken all the love Yoongi could have possibly given to anyone else.

"I'm ready."

"Hm?" Hoseok asked, tilting his head in confusion. Yoongi said nothing more. Instead, he led Hoseok into the living room. Things like this, the steps Yoongi was about to formally take, needed to be properly discussed, and for that, they needed to be seated. Hoseok's brows furrowed in confusion, holding both of Yoongi's hands tightly. Yoongi took a couple of seconds to breathe, forcing himself to relax, before finally talking.

"I want to be with you, Hoseok," Yoongi said, a bit faster than he'd intended. Hoseok seemed to catch every word regardless. The former expression of confusion dissolved, leaving an indiscernible expression on Hoseok's face. "Like boyfriends. We've pretty much been in a relationship without the label, but I think, well, I want to fully commit to it. To us."

"Yeah?" Hoseok breathed, yet another smile threatening to bloom on his lips. Yoongi nodded.

"Yeah," Yoongi confirmed. "I want to be with you, Hoseok. Officially. I don't know if I am ready to tell everyone else yet, but we've never made everything official. I know it's not much, but—"

"Yoongi," Hoseok interrupted, silencing Yoongi. "It's more than enough. You're more than enough."

A strange weight lifted off Yoongi's shoulders. He let out a sigh of relief, throwing himself onto Hoseok in glee, wrapping his arms around Hoseok. He felt lightheaded, and in ways, he was. He was soaring on cloud nine as Hoseok threaded his fingers through Yoongi's hair, showering him with kisses Yoongi would never be satiated by. It was surreal to think that he would feel the way he did with Hoseok. That dizzying, toxifying feeling of exhilaration, where he felt that all the stars were aligning at just the right moment. It was like everything in his life had been placed exactly where they were meant to be. He knew he wouldn't get tired of Hoseok.

No, not even with the nagging at the back of his head telling him that he would regret everything. That he'd just put himself in a position that could leave him homeless. Right now, Yoongi didn't care about that. All he cared about was being with Hoseok and knowing that despite everything that had happened between them, he could still call Hoseok, his boyfriend.

Hoseok Jung, his first love, his boyfriend, and his childhood best friend.

Yoongi was the luckiest person alive.

"You don't know how long I've been waiting for you to say that," Hoseok professed, pushing the hair away from Yoongi's eyes. "So we're together now? Officially?"

Yoongi smiled shyly. "If you want to be."

"It's what I've been dreaming of for a long time," Hoseok said. "If I introduce you as my boyfriend, Yoongi, all hell is going to break loose. We even told Isa that we weren't dating yet. My mom's definitely going to be excited, Jisoo too, and then my other friends, but most importantly, Jimin is probably going to be...."

Yoongi nodded. "Yeah. I know."

"So, we can tell them when it's safe to do so," Hoseok said, pausing briefly before adding, "If that's okay with you."

"It's perfect," Yoongi said, correcting himself and saying, "You're perfect."

The rest of the day had been spent cuddling and watching movies while Yoongi ate the array of food that Hoseok had spent hours making. If anything, knowing that Hoseok was an excellent cook let Yoongi feel better about having no cooking skills. It meant he could rely on Hoseok to make sure that he was well fed, and when he conveyed that, he only received a kiss and a promise that Hoseok would make him as much food as he possibly could to ensure that Yoongi wouldn't go hungry. They watched the sunset, and once the sky fully dimmed, Yoongi and Hoseok were forced to head back to their town, Yoongi still reeling from how fulfilling Valentine's Day had been, and all of it had to do with Hoseok.

By the time Yoongi got back to his home, it was almost midnight, and luckily, his parents weren't awake. He tiptoed up the stairs, almost unable to see because the bear Hoseok had gotten him was blocking his vision, the bouquet of roses pressed against his chest as he managed to head up the stairs and get into his room. Knowing that his parents would find it suspicious that he had a big bear and roses, he hid the bear in his closet, angled to where he could always see it, but not his parents if they were to open his door. He smelled the flowers, face content as he rushed downstairs to find a vase he could put them in.

"Who gave you those roses?"

The light in the kitchen turned on before Yoongi was able to process anything fully. His mother looked at him, clearly having been awake— Yoongi supposed she had been in the basement when Yoongi had come in. Yoongi opened his mouth to talk but found himself unable to say anything. It wasn't like he could say he got them from his now boyfriend (Yoongi's heart still fluttered at the words), so he did the next best thing he could think of.

"You ruined the surprise," Yoongi lied, clearing his throat. His mother looked at him confused, waiting for Yoongi to continue. "They were for you."

At that, Yoongi's mother softened. "For me?"

"I know dad usually doesn't get you any, and while I was out, I saw these and thought of you," Yoongi lied again, almost impressed with how smooth his lie was. His mother seemed to believe him, already reaching out to grab the roses Hoseok had bought for Yoongi. He didn't want to let them go, but for the sake of the lie, he gave them, watching as his mother's face lit up. "It's not much, but I was going to put them in a vase and set them for you to see in the morning. I thought you were asleep."

"Thank you," his mother said, already grabbing an empty vase. "These will be lovely in the living room. Now, you should go to sleep, Yoongi. You have school in the morning."

Right.

School.

Yoongi hugged his mother, kissing her cheek goodnight, before heading up the stairs. He did feel bad about lying to his mom, but if that was the price of keeping him safe, then he would do it. If his mother hadn't been in the basement, Yoongi wouldn't have been able to explain himself at all. His mother could have easily been in the living room, watching from what car Yoongi was getting out of. They knew Hoseok's truck down to the license plate, so if his mother had seen, he would have been fucked. Again, it seemed like someone was looking out for him, and he couldn't help but be grateful. He was still safe.

The next day, he made sure to text Jess early in the morning, asking about what had happened during breakfast the day before. Within seconds, almost as if she was waiting for him to text her, she responded.

jess: sorry about that. my parents were asking about how things were going and if we was gon' do sum for v-day yesterday. obv we didn't but i had to pretend that we was going to. ya kinda ruined dat doe

yoongi: u can't just do stuff and expect me to be okay with it

yoongi: warn me next time. i alr told you i wasn't planning on doing anything with you. haven't used you as an excuse at all, why are u using me?

jess: it's easier this way for me. ya should understand dat i don't mean harm. i'm just tryin to talk to ma gal without my family interfering

jess: catch me slack not everyone can have it as good as u do

yoongi: ???

yoongi: what are you talking about?

jess: ya got friends who support ya and yer trucker boy's with you too

jess: ion got friends like that and ma gal is in another state

jess: you even got 2 spend time with trucker boy for v-day yesterday n i can't even gift anything special to my gal and i been with her for years

jess: it's not fair

yoongi: what i did yesterday isn't ur business but u trying to get our families to think some we're not is.

yoongi: i'm not comfortable with u being touchy tryna hold my hand and shit. i don't think ur gf would appreciate it either

jess: trucker boy won't appreciate it neither

jess: cuz he's your bf

jess: right?

Yoongi frowned.

yoongi: idk what ur talking about

yoongi: anyways, u need to chill, ok? eventually our parents are gonna know we aren't a thing.

jess: i know

jess: das why i'm taking as much advantage as i can rn

jess: grad's right around da corner

jess: then everything will be okay

jess: can we hang out? like we used to

jess: talkin in person feels better than talking to u through text

jess: i already do that enough as it is

~ Read 7:25 am.

"Wow, Yoongi, that's a nice necklace you got."

Yoongi almost choked on his food, quickly downing a gulp of water to balance himself. Namjoon only looked at him, swirling the spaghetti he currently had on his plate with a fork, while Hoseok suddenly found his fingernails more interesting than the conversation at hand. Namjoon noticed Hoseok's reaction and laughed, stuffing his mouth with spaghetti. Clearly, he knew that something had happened between them, and considering that Yoongi couldn't hide anything from Namjoon even if he wanted to, he spoke.

"A very...special someone gave it to me," Yoongi said, voice low enough so that only Namjoon and Hoseok could hear. Namjoon's lips pulled into a smirk, and he casually pointed his fork to Hoseok, and Yoongi nodded. Then, Namjoon used the fork to gesture at the both of them, though this time, Hoseok nodded alongside Yoongi. "So yeah. Are you happy now?"

"Mm, can't wait to tell the whole world," Namjoon teased. "Jimin owes me money now. Thank you for that."

Hoseok rolled his eyes, his ears betraying him by his reddened ears. Yoongi looked at both of them in confusion, asking for clarification. Begrudgingly, Hoseok informed Yoongi of the bet that Namjoon and Jimin had taken. Yoongi came to find out that Jimin didn't believe that Yoongi and Hoseok would ever become a thing and that Hoseok had made the bad decision to drop someone that could actually love him back. Namjoon (having the upper hand because he was the first one to find out Yoongi's sexuality) had argued that they would be together eventually. When Yoongi and Hoseok started hanging out the way they did, and with the close call during New Year's, Namjoon had been more confident than ever. So Jimin proposed that if Yoongi and Hoseok started dating by the end of the school year, he would give Namjoon a hundred dollars. Namjoon had taken the bet, knowing that he would win.

"That's not fair to Jimin," Yoongi protested, eliciting laughter from Namjoon. "You're such a cheater."

"It's not cheating if I was making informed decisions," Namjoon responded cheekily. "I just had information that Jimin didn't know about. What's important is that I am one hundred dollars richer. Not yet, but I will be."

Yoongi laughed. "You're impossible."

He was lucky that Hoseok was patient with him. Even though Namjoon knew now, Hoseok didn't seem bothered that he couldn't tell anyone else. It made Yoongi feel the tiniest of guilt, but he remembered that while Hoseok was openly gay, Yoongi was not, so for him to talk to Namjoon about this would be different than if Hoseok were to speak to Jimin. Namjoon knew Yoongi. Jimin did not. God, Yoongi couldn't have asked for a more perfect boyfriend.

Boyfriend.

Something he'd never thought he would say, but something that felt right all the same.

"That reminds me, I texted Jess about yesterday," Yoongi said, pulling out his phone, showing both Namjoon and Hoseok. "You were definitely right in calling her a bit.."

Namjoon nodded. "Yeah, no. Why does she sound jealous?"

"She also sounds like she's trying to sus you out," Hoseok added, a frown already tugging at his lips. "Joon, I don't like this at all."

"Me neither," Namjoon agreed. "You should block her."

"Isn't that too harsh?" Yoongi mumbled, putting his phone away. "I still have to see her on Sundays. If I stop going to church, my parents are going to be pissed. I'm almost eighteen. They'll kick me out for sure."

Hoseok shrugged. "You said you opened your own bank account already. You've been putting money in there, right?"

"Not enough," Yoongi huffed. "Not to sustain me living on my own for months."

Especially not when Yoongi would have to pay Northeastern's deposit by himself.

Yoongi had received the email during one of his morning classes. He had excused himself to go to the bathroom, locking himself in the stall as he scrolled through his phone, finger hovering over the link in the email.

The Board of Admissions has reached a decision on your application for admission to Northeastern University. To view your decision, log in to your portal here.

He couldn't remember the last time he'd felt this nervous over academic reasons. The email offered nothing to indicate that he had gotten in, and Yoongi didn't know what he would do in the case that he hadn't gotten accepted. His hands were shaking as he pressed on the link, adrenaline coursing through him as he hurriedly typed his log-in info, anxious to see what his future would hold. The seconds seemed to tick by forever as he pressed on his decision letter, and he closed his eyes for a couple of seconds before opening them and immediately flooding with relief.

Dear Yoongi,

Congratulations! I am delighted to offer you admission to the 119th entering class and to Criminal Justice in the College of Social Sciences and Humanities at Northeastern University.

He hadn't told anyone yet— not even Namjoon. For now, Yoongi would keep this a secret. He'd wait until Hoseok's birthday and print the admission letters so that Hoseok could be the first to know.

"You can always live rent-free at my place if worse comes to shove," Hoseok offered. "We can figure something out. They won't throw you out just because you decided not to go to church. Maybe for other things, but not that."

Hoseok was right.

Still.

Yoongi didn't want to risk it.

"Also, am I seeing you today?" Hoseok asked suddenly. "After school?"

"Actually, I have some things to take care of," Yoongi mentally cringed at how hurriedly his voice sounded. Hoseko arched an eyebrow, eyeing Yoongi curiously, before shrugging.

It wasn't a lie. He did have lots of things he had to work on. Only Hoseok couldn't know because if he did know, he would leap for joy, and Yoongi wanted to tell him the news when they were alone together because, without Hoseok, he would never have applied for Early Decision. He wouldn't have even dreamed about going to Boston the way that he and Hoseok had said they would (or California! But they both ended up getting accepted to the same school in the same city), and he would have gone to school in the middle of nowhere Indiana. He didn't even have to go to a directly religiously affiliated institution.

He just needed to pay the deposit. Luckily it was only about two hundred dollars, so he had enough to pay for today, which was what he planning on doing. Early Decision was binding anyhow, so no matter what, his parents couldn't force him to stay and enroll at another college instead. Yoongi's college search was over, and his future was now solidified. He'd be going to Northeastern with his boyfriend and finally explore life outside of Texas.

He was excited, to say the least.

The process had been anti-climatic, but every time Yoongi withdrew applications for the colleges that he had considered, all he could feel was giddier and giddier, excitement encapsulating every fiber of his being. Everything was falling into place, and because of it, it was hard for Yoongi not to believe that all of this was meant to be. When he finally looked over his financial aid, relief swept over him that, just as Hoseok had said, he had managed to get more aid than he'd expected to. He'd still have to pay some out of pocket, but overall, he should be set. He'd applied for scholarships and gotten some; he could always get some more to help cover the gap. If not, he could always get a job. It was fine. Feasible.

Attainable.

He printed a copy of the admissions decision letter and folded it, placing it neatly on the box that held the bracelet he'd gotten Hoseok. Though it was a simple gold and silver that only held his name, there were little charms etched onto the lettering, the band intertwining to make intricate layerings that Yoongi knew would look good on Hoseok's wrist. He felt a bit silly for getting something that had Hoseok's name on it (he had to get it custom done, too), but it looked too pretty not to gift to Hoseok.

He hated the way Hoseok made him feel, but he loved it all the same.

It was as if he was in a high school movie. A modern-day rendition of Romeo and Juliet. The resemblances were uncanny. Yoongi's family hated Hoseok's, but Hoseok's family didn't necessarily hate him. They couldn't be seen together because if his parents even suspected what Yoongi decided to pursue with Hoseok, they would do things much worse than death. They'd find a way to make his life miserable, even with Yoongi having Hoseok's family's support. Huh. Maybe his story wasn't all that similar to Romeo and Juliet.

It's more of Hoseok and Yoongi against Yoongi's family and the rest of the world.

No biggie, really.

But he had all the hope that everything would go right. Not because he wanted to believe that everything would go right but because Hoseok reassured him time and time again that even if things got messed up, it wouldn't matter because they would have each other. Hoseok would be there, alongside Yoongi, every step of the way, and that alone was enough to reassure Yoongi tenfold. Perhaps it was an unhealthy way to think, but if Hoseok willed everything to be okay, then Yoongi had no choice but to happily believe it.

At this point, false hope was one of the few things keeping Yoongi going.