"Happy birthday."

It wasn't as nearly romantic as Yoongi had planned it out to be, mostly because of him. He had thrust the bouquet of sunflowers he'd managed to find, the bag that contained Hoseok's present, and the acceptance letter buried under it to give to him. How he'd managed not to run away was beyond Yoongi. Maybe it was the fear that was paralyzing him. In theory, getting Hoseok all of that was good, something that a boyfriend would do. However, the bracelet had been something that he'd already thought about giving Hoseok, but now that they were officially dating, would it seem like it was too much? Hoseok had given him a necklace, and he only took it off when he had to take showers, so maybe Hoseok wouldn't see it as too much...right?

And then the acceptance later? Was it a bit tacky? It was Hoseok's birthday, after all, and they'd spared this moment alone and milk for all it was worth. In a couple of minutes, everyone else would come, and Yoongi and Hoseok would have to separate. They didn't have to, but they had just started dating. Yoongi couldn't just come out and admit that they were a thing. It would overshadow Hoseok's eighteenth birthday. It was much too soon.

Hoseok gasped as he took out the box that contained the bracelet, looking at it mesmerized. He beamed, and Yoongi swore that every time Hoseok smiled, it seemed to get brighter. It was like Yoongi was uncovering every layer that was Hoseok, and the more he saw, the more he was a moth attracted to Hoseok's flame, yearning for more. His heart warmed as Hoseok asked him to clasp the bracelet, and he did so, being extra careful so as to not accidentally hurt him. When it was put, Yoongi planted a kiss on Hoseok's lips, pulling away with a dazed smile. He would do all of that for Hoseok.

He would do anything for Hoseok.

Yoongi sounded pathetic. If only his parents could hear him now.

He watched in anticipation as Hoseok pulled out the paper, Yoongi's heart suddenly beating in a frenzy. He watched as Hoseok's eyebrows furrowed unfolding the paper, lips forming a slight pout as he strained to read the words. Eyes widened at the realization, and another breathtaking smile lit Hoseok's lips. He opened his arms wide and pulled Yoongi into an excited embrace, Yoongi able to smell the scent of the sunflowers enveloping the both of them. He let out a relieved sigh, melting into Hoseok's arms.

"When did you find out?" Hoseok asked, unable to keep the excitement off his voice.

"The fifteenth," Yoongi said, smiling back. "I sent the deposit in that day. That's why I told you I was busy."

Hoseok's eyes lit in understanding. "You slipped from under me just to surprise me? You didn't even tell me when the decisions were coming out!"

"Well, yeah," Yoongi cleared his throat, suddenly feeling shy. "I wanted to tell you, but I thought you'd take it better wrapped as a gift, and I didn't want to bring you false hope. I don't think my big official letter in the mail's come in yet, but once it does, it should be official. It is official, considering I already paid, but maybe we could take pictures with it."

"And upload it on Instagram for everyone to know?" Hoseok teased, setting down the flowers on his desk. Yoongi rolled his eyes.

"No, for your mom," Yoongi said. "I know she'll be bouncing off the walls knowing we're officially going to the same university next year."

Hoseok sighed loudly. "I know. She'll hang a huge picture of us and brag about it to all her friends. Oh, Jimin's going to have fun with this one. Have you told anyone else yet? Like Namjoon."

Yoongi froze. "I'd completely forgotten to. I think I wanted you to know first, so I didn't tell anyone."

"I'm glad I was first on your list," Hoseok grinned lazily, stealing a kiss from Yoongi's lips. "Honored. I would have wanted you to leap into my arms, but I guess letting me know via present is fine too. Are you excited?"

"Terrified," Yoongi admitted. "Once that letter arrives in the mail, it'll be over. They'll know. "

Hoseok ran his fingers through Yoongi's hair, smiling softly. "I'll be here. If it gets too heated, my door is always open."

"Yeah," Yoongi murmured. "But let's not worry about that now. It's your birthday. We should celebrate. Downstairs. With everyone else."

"I'd rather be in here with you," Hoseok replied smoothly, looping his arms around Yoongi's waist. "The rest of them can wait, don't you think?"

Yoongi's eyes fluttered closed as Hoseok closed the distance between them, his fingers locking themselves in Hoseok's hair. It was a thing Yoongi noticed— how openly touching Hoseok was between them and how much Yoongi enjoyed clinging onto Hoseok's hair. No matter how close they were, they couldn't get close enough, and it was a strange feat. Maybe it was them making up for their lost time. The times that they could have been together were completely overshadowed by Yoongi's parents and Yoongi's internalized homophobia. Now that they were with each other, they had to steal every opportunity that they could because they'd already missed so much.

"I love you," Hoseok whispered. "So much. I can't wait for our future together."

A future that was in their reach. Yoongi smiled, wrapping his arms around Hoseok's body, hugging him tightly. No more words ended up being spoken between them— there was no need to. Yoongi's heart belonged to Hoseok, and that was the only thing that mattered. They belonged to each other, no matter how much anyone tried to pull them apart. They would always be together, as long as they still loved each other, and part of Yoongi hoped that he could love Hoseok Jung for the rest of his life.

He couldn't imagine himself with anyone else.

When Yoongi finally managed to convince Hoseok to head down the stairs, where Jimin, Namjoon, and the rest of Hoseok's friends were waiting. They immediately crowded around him, hugging and wishing him a happy birthday, while Yoongi sneakily went to stand by Namjoon's side. Namjoon, who held a knowing smile on his face, nudged Yoongi, who blushed in return, looking away. He motioned towards the backyard, and Namjoon nodded, walking alongside Yoongi. They sat down on the chairs, not worried about anyone hearing them because everyone else was outside.

"Did he like the gift?"

Yoongi nodded. He had consulted Namjoon over the bracelet, and while Namjoon had teased him nonstop about it, he helped connect Yoongi to the right people. For that, Yoongi was grateful. He was grateful for many things, but above all, knowing that his best friend was supporting him and offering him encouragement was something he'd only wished he could have given Namjoon before. If only he could have been more supportive earlier, maybe things would have played out differently. They were still best friends, but knowing that they could have been closer did hurt Yoongi.

He remembered when his mother had assumed that Namjoon was gay. Yoongi had defended him, saying that he had a girlfriend, and the girlfriend turned out to be a guy— Jimin. He still remembered the words he'd told his mom and how blatantly he had dismissed Namjoon not being "one of those," and it was surreal to know that everything had changed. Yoongi had changed. He'd discovered who he was after a series of disastrous events, and Namjoon never once treated him like shit for it.

If there was a title for the number one best friend in the whole universe, Yoongi was certain Namjoon would win it without difficulty.

"I need to tell you something," Yoongi said. Namjoon raised an eyebrow, nodding slowly. "I'm going to Boston in the fall. Officially."

"Really?" Namjoon asked, looking at Yoongi in disbelief. "You're not going to Boston College, are you?" Yoongi shook his head, noticing Namjoon's expression flood with relief. "Then where?"

"I'm going to Northeastern," Yoongi answered. "I changed my application to Early Decision, and I heard back a couple of days ago. I'm NEU bound or whatever they call it."

"You don't sound that excited," Namjoon said, looking at Yoongi in concern. "What's the matter?"

Yoongi didn't have to say anything for Namjoon to understand.

"Your parents don't get to decide your future," Namjoon said, placing a hand on Yoongi's thigh. "When I told my parents I didn't want to go to a religious university, they freaked out. They threatened to ground me, to kick me out, to withhold my college fund— everything they could to pressure me into going to a religious school."

"What did you do to get them to agree?"

Namjoon smiled. "I told them I wanted to have the freedom to pursue education in a school of my choosing and that I wouldn't be able to succeed without the choice. You know I wouldn't. I've had four years to deal with the school we're in, and to go to a school that's even more religious? I can't do it. The programs I want to pursue don't exist in the universities they wanted me to go to, and I told them that the most important thing was my happiness. I would rather have the freedom to explore than be shackled because of God. I'd grown disdain for God if they forced me to go the route they wanted, and they backed off."

"So they just understood?" Yoongi asked. Namjoon burst into laughter, shaking his head adamantly. "Really?"

"Oh, yeah," Namjoon chuckled. "My dad especially stopped talking to me for a couple of days. My mom was proud that I was standing my ground and making my own decisions. Dad sulked because I'd be the first in the family to break tradition, but he came around eventually. He even got excited when I showed him my acceptances. I haven't decided where I want to go yet, and I'm still waiting on Jimin's acceptances, but knowing you're going to Boston is definitely putting Boston at the top of my list. Maybe I'll get into MIT. Harvard."

Yoongi scoffed, rolling his eyes. "I'm surprised Harvard isn't throwing itself to get someone like you on their campus. What about USC?"

"It would be nice, but what if I want to experience the snow?" Namjoon said, smiling softly. "I've always wanted to be in places that snow. It would be fun. Apart from your parents, are you having any doubts?"

Was Yoongi?

"Northeastern was always one of my top schools," Yoongi said, smiling softly as he reminisced the past. "We hadn't met yet, but I used to talk to Hoseok all the time about how much I wanted to go. My parents supported it before, actually, or at the very least, they pretended they did. After everything happened, they shut it down, and well, you know." Namjoon nodded solemnly. "I feel so incredibly lucky that I'm going. Hoseok also going is a plus. I mean, I didn't think we'd ever be friends again, let alone be...dating."

"It sounds weird coming from your mouth," Namjoon teased, earning a playful dirty look from Yoongi. "You, Yoongi?" His voice lowered. "Having a boyfriend?"

"Stop," Yoongi mumbled, shoving Namjoon lightly. "Don't say it like that."

"Must be a dream come true," Namjoon sighed dramatically. "You and your significant other going to the same school. What's next? Will you two be roommates? Join the twin XL beds together?"

"We're thinking too far into the future," Yoongi murmured. "I don't want to think about that right now. I think I'll need to deal with everything else before focusing on the college part. Like how my parents are going to react and if they find out about Hoseok and me."

Namjoon nodded pensively. "As long as you hide it, you should be safe. You just have to be careful of who you trust. One wrong conversation and you could be outed."

"Outed?"

"Yeah," Namjoon said, "It's when someone reveals that you aren't straight, regardless of whether it'll put you in danger or not. They expose you to the people you weren't ready to come out to yet. It happens more often than you think. Think about Hoseok. No one can actually confirm whether or not Hoseok's gay because he's never said so, but the school knows regardless. They were rumors, yes, but they were rumors that held truth. Jimin, well, he was outed. It wasn't pretty. I was scared that you might out me if I told you, remember? I told you that."

Yoongi remembered. He remembered it so clearly, and it would be something that would hurt his soul for the rest of his life. At least he'd apologized, and he was fine with Namjoon's decisions to keep his identity concealed, even if it did mean that he was hurt. He understood, and now that he was in a position where he could be outed, Yoongi knew that he had to make sure that no one other than those he trusted could know about him.

"I don't think anything will happen," Namjoon said, giving Yoongi a reassuring smile. "No one here would dream of outing you to your parents. As far as anyone's concerned, you're a single man living your best life, finishing the last few months of senior year. We got this."

He held out a fist, and Yoongi smiled, bumping fists with Namjoon.

"Sorry to interrupt."

Yoongi and Namjoon turned to Kangdae, peering out from the closed door. They gestured inside, and Yoongi could see that they were already lighting up the cake for Hoseok.

"We're planning on dunking Hoseok's head on the cake," Kangdae said, smiling. "We did it last year, and he's not letting anyone by his side this time, not even Jimin or his siblings. We were wondering if you'd like to do the honors this year. I have a feeling he'd let you be next to him. I don't think he'll let Namjoon either. We have another cake, so feel free to go crazy."

Yoongi nodded gravely. "We have to keep the tradition, don't we?"

Kangdae beamed. "You get it. Come on. He's going to get suspicious if he sees me talking to you too long."

They headed back inside, and just as Kangdae had said, no one was next to Hoseok. He hadn't noticed Yoongi yet, as he was busy shooing everyone away from him, but once he saw Yoongi, his eyes lit up, and all the shooing he was doing disappeared. Yoongi sauntered to Hoseok's side, and as much as he wanted Hoseok to wrap his arm around Yoongi, he knew that they were in front of everyone now. Even Alex was there, and for the past couple of months, Yoongi hadn't been able to look Alex in the eye. Though Hoseok had always said that he loved Yoongi, a part of Yoongi did feel guilty that he got in the way of Alex and Hoseok ever getting together.

It wasn't like he'd meant to get in between them.

"Oh, so you're letting Yoongi next to you, but you're not letting us?" Josie pouted, folding her arms. "That's not fair."

Yoongi gave Josie a blinding smile. "Guess I'm just special."

Jimin scoffed. "Hardly."

"I'm surprised that we're cutting the cake first before having food or dancing," Yoongi commented.

"See?" Hoseok said, triumphant. "He gets me. I think this is suspicious, which is why I'm not letting you anywhere near me."

Namjoon rolled his eyes. "How are we going to take pictures with you? We need the memories!"

"After I blow the candles," Hoseok said. "I won't trust y'all before then. You've done the same shit the past two years now. I'm not falling for it again."

"But you'll trust Yoongi?" Alex piped, gesturing to Yoongi.

"I'd be careful if I were you," Jimin added, adding fuel to the brewing fire. "He can easily betray your trust."

Were they making digs at him?

Yoongi shook the thought out of his head. He raised his arms up in surrender, taking a few steps away from Hoseok. "Totally innocent over here."

That seemed to dispel a bit of the tension between everyone. At the count of Hoseok's mother, they all began to sing, and Yoongi slowly inched closer to Hoseok. Whether Hoseok noticed or not, he didn't say, and when he finally leaned in to blow out the candle, Yoongi waited until he had finished to strike. Kangdae gave Yoongi a thumbs up, and Yoongi dunked Hoseok's head onto the cake, earning laughs from everyone. Yoongi leaned towards Hoseok, whose face and hair was now covered in frosting. He lay unmoving, an indiscernible on his face.

"You okay?" Yoongi asked, getting closer. Hoseok said nothing, so Yoongi edged closer, placing his arm over Hoseok's shoulder. He failed to realize that his head was leaning too dangerously close to the cake and that he'd let his guard down.

Hoseok returned the favor, pushing Yoongi's head onto the cake. Everyone else, who was already laughing, burst into more laughter, and Yoongi looked at Hoseok, shocked, while Hoseok only looked smug, his expression hidden by the frosting and cake on his face.

"I can't believe you did that," Yoongi scoffed. "What did I do to deserve this?"

"I knew they'd gotten you to push my face to the cake," Hoseok snickered. "I just figured if I go down, then you'll go down with me." Lowering his voice, he said, "It makes for cute pictures, don't you think?"

Yoongi wrinkled his nose, an action that only caused Hoseok to laugh harder. He looked back at the smashed cake, knowing that it was completely inedible. Hoseok's mother was taking pictures of the two of them, Namjoon following closely behind with a wicked grin planted on his lips. Kangdae brought the identical cake, while Josie took the first cake, and Hoseok and Yoongi excused themselves to the bathroom to clean up.

Some of the cake had inadvertently gotten on Hoseok's shirt, so he decided to change it. They went into his room, grabbing some bath wipes so that they could clean their faces. Hoseok swiped some frosting off Yoongi's nose before he could wipe his face, tasting the frosting with his mouth.

"At least the frosting tastes good," Hoseok said cheerfully. Yoongi felt his cheeks warm. "Though that could just be my bias."

"You're ridiculous," Yoongi mumbled, starting to wipe his face. He stopped as Hoseok reached out to him, wiping the other side of Yoongi's face with the wipe he had. Yoongi smiled at the small action, letting Hoseok finish wiping the rest of the frosting. Once he was done, Yoongi did the same for him, and they stood in comfortable silence. Afterward, Hoseok went back into his room and quickly took off his shirt, tossing it into the laundry basket before going to his closet to rummage for another one.

"What do you think?"

"Hm?"

Yoongi poked his head out of the bathroom to be met with Hoseok. His eyes widened at the sight, mind blank as he noticed Hoseok turned to him with a question in his eyes. The shirt Hoseok had first been wearing had been switched to a completely new one. It was a maroon turtleneck that fit Hoseok's frame snugly, and as Yoongi's eyes trailed down, he noticed the shirt stopped right on top of his belly button, exposing Hoseok's stomach. Yoongi was at a loss of words.

Noticing Yoongi's face, Hoseok frowned, already tugging at his shirt. "I can change it if it's too much...I bought it a while back, and I've never worn it, so I thought maybe now could be a good time to use it. I mean, I've never worn a cropped shirt before, but I thought it was cute and—"

"Don't change it!" Yoongi blurted, finally speaking. Hoseok stopped short, surprise lighting his expression. "It looks...looks...."

He couldn't find the words. He'd lost his ability to speak. He'd lost the ability to do anything.

Is this what it felt like to be speechless?

It wasn't like Hoseok was dressed out. All he had on was a cropped turtleneck and the jeans that he'd already been wearing, and Yoongi couldn't figure out what to say. All he could do was stare dumbfounded as Hoseok continued to look at him, waiting for Yoongi's response.

"Wow," Yoongi finally settled with. "Fuck."

He'd seen people wear crop tops before. It wasn't a new invention, and usually, Yoongi wouldn't bat an eye at it, but seeing Hoseok in a crop top, exposing his lower stomach, with his jeans hanging at his waist, well, Yoongi couldn't function. Hoseok had rendered him useless, and Yoongi couldn't even trust himself if they were going downstairs. He wouldn't be able to stop staring at Hoseok— no, not when Hoseok looked this amazing.

If Yoongi was reacting like this to Hoseok, he could only imagine how much he'd combust if he ever saw Hoseok dressing up. His heart would be in danger. Hell, his entire self would be. He was a goner for Hoseok.

"It's good, then?" Hoseok asked, slightly anxious. Yoongi nodded robotically, continuing to stare at Hoseok. "Is that why you're staring so much? It's just a bit of skin."

"It's not the skin," Yoongi stammered. "It's how it fits you. Fuck, you're handsome."

Hoseok beamed. "Yeah? So should I wear crop tops more often?"

"Fuck yes," Yoongi groaned, almost too quickly. Hoseok giggled, walking up to loop his arms around Yoongi. Yoongi's arms looped around Hoseok's waist, Hoseok flinching slightly as Yoongi's cold hands touched his bare skin. "You okay?"

Hoseok nodded. "Your hands are freezing."

"I was in the process of drying my hands," Yoongi mused, kissing Hoseok once more. "Come on. Everyone's going to wonder where we went. Besides, I think it would be a crime if you didn't show anyone how good you look right now. I'm kind of glad that you had to change, actually. I'm taking credit for this."

Hoseok's eyebrow raised. "Oh yeah?"

Yoongi took out his phone, fingers fumbling to press on the camera. Hoseok looked at him questioningly, only realizing what Yoongi was doing as he turned the camera toward them.

"We don't have any pictures of each other," Yoongi said, already positioning his camera. "I don't know how to take selfies or anything, but I think you'll be the photogenic one out of the both of us. Now smile."

Hoseok did so, and as Yoongi clicked away, he suddenly leaned in to kiss Yoongi's cheek. The phone camera went click, and Yoongi's cheeks blossomed pink. This time, Yoongi leaned in to kiss Hoseok's lips, and he pressed click, capturing the two in each other's embrace. When they were done, Hoseok had wasted no time in grabbing Yoongi's phone, immediately sending himself all the pictures they'd taken.

"Look at this one," Hoseok said, pointing to the screen as he gave the phone back to Yoongi. "You look so fucking whipped."

"It can't be that bad," Yoongi protested, eyes looking over at it. But, as he looked at the picture, Yoongi knew Hoseok was speaking nothing more than the truth.

It was that bad.

No wonder his parents had worried for him all those years ago. Looking at the picture, there was no way to excuse how Yoongi felt. If anyone were to find the picture (or any other ones on his phone, for that matter), Yoongi wouldn't be able to defend himself. The way his eyes were looking at Hoseok radiated the emotion that Yoongi had once thought he would only feel with a woman. They held immense love, endless oceans of it, and the way his lips were curled upwards to reveal the hints of a smile as he was holding Hoseok, whose smile radiated brighter than a thousand suns. They looked happy. They looked like they were in love.

Above all, it looked completely normal.

There was nothing weird about him staring at himself and Hoseok looking like a couple. If anything, it looked right. Hoseok and Yoongi fit seamlessly together, like the perfect pieces of a puzzle, completing each other. It was no wonder no one else stood a chance. This one picture alone proved that Hoseok and Yoongi were meant for each other. It was reassuring somehow to know that a simple picture could prove what Yoongi had been internally debating, absolving him of all his potential, scattered doubts.

The past and its hatred had kept them apart from each other, but that didn't matter anymore. The future could be completely different from the picture in front of him, but right now, the future didn't matter. The only thing that mattered right now was the present, and the present was being Hoseok Jung's boyfriend and loving Hoseok the way he had loved Yoongi all those years ago.

"Did I look at you like that before we got together?" Yoongi asked. Hoseok laughed.

"Do you really need me to answer that question?" Hoseok asked, to which Yoongi nodded. Hoseok's features softened. "All the damn time. Why do you think I never moved on? You made it impossible, Yoon. You drove me crazy. Still do. At least now, you're mine."

The knock on the door, followed by Isla's yelling, stopped their conversation. Isla opened the door; eyes narrowed at the scene before her. Considering it was Isla, Hoseok and Yoongi were still close to each other— not touching, but certainly not the appropriate feet apart for a friendship. She pointed at the two of them, muttering that she knew what they were doing, before demanding them to get back to Hoseok's party. When Hoseok refused to move, Isla ran up to him, grabbing his arm and yanking Hoseok away from Yoongi, who only raised his arms in surrender. He followed closely behind, hearing everyone's immediate gasp and compliments at Hoseok's change in shirt. There were a few lingering, suspicious stares, but other than that, everything appeared to be completely normal.

As the party continued, Yoongi realized he had been right.

He hadn't been able to keep his eyes off Hoseok for the rest of that night.

a/n: will post warning but next chapter is very heavy read at ur own discretion