Panchaali moaned in pain as she blinked her eyes open, the intense pain had her crumpling as she wrapped her hand around her waist, her breathing coming in shallow pants as agony thrummed to her body, though it wasn't as intense as it was supposed to be it was still there, she groaned, "Here drink this Panchaali." Nakul said as he brought the glass of medicine to her lips, his hand wrapping around shoulders, pressing her closer to him as he assisted her to sit up, the poison had left her weak, his heart thrummed as he looked at her, his heart squeezing, none of them were able to meet her eyes for too long, he knew that it wasn't his fault but they felt guilty, if only they had known she wouldn't have deprived of her motherhood, he looked at her, the innocent sweet eyes looking up at him, an expression of worry on her face as she looked up at him.

"What happened arya?" Her fragile voice asked him, he forced a smile as he looked at her, "Nothing sweetheart just that the we have some political issue is all." He assured as he rubbed her shoulders with his rough hands, his face nuzzling her neck to hide the tears that formed in his eyes, he wanted to cry, his throat tightening at the thought of her the reaction at her. He sighed as he pushed his agony down, she was too weak, any sort of trauma could mess with her system, so they had decided to not tell her anything as of yet. He pulled back a smile on his face as pain slithered through his smile, "I'll be back you drink this and rest." He instructed his voice clogging with a sharp burn in his throat that had it tightening, she nodded as she drank the medicine before turning around and leaving, a smile on his face as he looked at her, he pressed his lips to her forehead as she drank the medicine, a smile on her lips, she laid back, shutting her eyes before her breathing evened out.

"She slept?" Arjun asked as he entered with the rest of his brothers, "How long are you guys going to avoid her?" Nakul asked, his eyes meeting theirs, "it's not her that we are avoiding,it's the pain, every time I see her my heart squeezes with pain. I don't know how she will react when we will tell her the truth." Arjun confessed, his heart throbbing with pain as they looked at her, she lay on the bed unconscious, unaware of all the adversities that had taken place, he traced his hands through her hair, the silky texture of it making him want to calm, but the harsh reality pulling him out of that calm sense as he looked at her, he sat beside her as he pressed his lips to her forehead, letting his lips linger on the warm skin a bit more than necessary just feeling the warmth and enjoying her closeness, a calm reassurance that she was happy, in pain but happy none the less, he feared how she would react to the truth when forced to face with it, if he could, he would have gone back in time and stopped this horrendous thing from happening to her, but life didn't work that way, now did it? What if the truth was too much for her and he lost her? It was a possibility, a possibility that scared him to no end. He squeezed his eyes shut, agony zinged through his heart as he laid his forehead against hers breathing in the calming scent that relaxed him, that made him forget about everything, for a few precious moments he wanted to just feel her close, to be near her warmth, to assure himself that she was fine.

"I don't think I would ever be able to tell her that the poison given to her though didn't take her life had taken her motherhood." Karn confessed, his voice ringing with the soul wrenching pain that surrounded him every second of his life, that made him feel dead every passing moment, what sort of king he was if couldn't protect the queen of his own heart? What sort of warrior was he if he failed to protect the one girl he loved the most? His conscious taunted him, snarling at his incapacity to protect her, his enemies had hurt her in the worst of ways and what was he able to do? Stand by and watch? Fury and pain tangled in his heart creating a deadly mixture, killing him from within every passing moment, he failed her, he failed the one woman whom he loved more than his soul, he didn't deserve to be husband, he didn't deserve something as precious as her, someone who was so very loving and kind.

Yudhisthir said, nothing, he felt nothing, ever since the killing of Raman he hadn't said anything, what was there to say? What was left to say? The anticipation of her knowing the truth was like a slow poison that was killing them, that killed him, with each passing moment he felt lost, he didn't even know what to make out of the situation, just thinking about the inevitable shook him to the core, her knowing the truth was inevitable, her feeling that pain was inevitable, even after being one of the greatest warrior and king, he felt weak, he felt broken, if the anticipation scared him so much what would he do when she got to know the truth, what would he tell her when she asked him why this happened to her? What will he answer her when she would question him why the natures biggest gift and God's great blessing to women was stolen away from her? What would he reply when she would ask what was his fault? Just thinking about this questions scared him to no end, he had no answers for her, what could he say, hot white pain sizzled through his chest making his breath hitch,tears glazed in his eyes but he didn't let them fall, if they did he feared he won't be able to stop, his grief was crushing his soul, making him question what he had done to deserve this.
Sehdev shared a look with his twin, the atmosphere in the room was heavy, a slow grief that burned through him, the dead heavy weight of his resting on his shoulder as it became impossible for him to the think straight, he was the most rational and the most calm minded, the one who was believed to hold it all together when trouble came, but this was one problem that he could see no solution to, he had gone through all the available texts, all the available books and every piece of written knowledge trying to find a way out of this mess, trying to find that one way that would buffer her pain, that would lessen the agony that she would feel, a way where he could fix what had been wronged, where he could return that one natural right to her that was cruelly snatched out of her hands, but alas, nothing was found, no amount of knowledge could undo this wrong, what was the use of him being the world's smartest man if that intelligence and knowledge can't fix one thing, can't fix one problem, can't fix one wrong that was done, what was the use of his knowledge if he couldn't help the one woman he loved more than life? He sighed heavily, his shoulders slouching, eyes burning with unshed tears as he tried breathing through the hot boiling ache, that had become his new companion.

Time passed the silence turned heavier, the brothers looking at their wife who lay in her bed, the ache in their chest just continued to intensify as they gazed at her, they all wanted to be alone for awhile, they stood up, one after another the pandavas left her alone, shutting the door behind themselves.

Panchaali's POV:

My eyes flew open as I heard the click of the door shutting, crushing grief that weiged on my soul. It’s all I know. All I feel. Like it has become a part of me, like the pain was the very essence of my soul, at least it made me realise that I was alive, that I wasn't dead. That I was able to feel something. The words of arya Karn ringing in my ears, I could no longer become a mother, they thought I was sleep but I wasn't, and the truth I heard had shaken my entire reality. I couldn't be a mother

Ache slithers through my soul, weighing down my bones and slicing me into a distorted version of the girl I used to know. The thought that I could never have a child was way too much,I would never be able to fee those magical nine months that changed a woman's life, I could never be able to hold a life in my hands, a child who would look a bit like me and a bit like my aryas,no that happiness, that right was forever stolen from me, the thought made my heart throb, I refused to believe that, there was just no way. This all has to be a dream, it has to be. I held my breath, afraid to breathe as if the simple act of inhaling and exhaling will make this tragic reality real.

Each second crawled by in slow motion until my lungs burn for air. I suck in a soundless breath as movement surrounds me. My eyes sting as the ache thrums through my chest, a constant reminder of what I had lost, that I could never have children, that there would be no one out there who would ever call me mata, motherhood was the ultimate dream of every woman, that phase where you see your child grow, where you nurture a life, where you smile and cry with your child, where you feel like you have taken a new birth, it was all gone, this dreams would forever be dreams, forever lost, gone in the flow of time. And all I could do was cry, grieve for something that was snatched away from me so cruelly, sobs wrecked my body as I gave out a loud scream, my agony took the form of tears as I wept, screaming and crying, no matter how much tears I cried the pain didn't stop, it didn't go away, somewhere through my painful haze I heard a door being banged open, footsteps running in, voices filtered around me, as hands touched me, but I was too deep gone, too lost in that heart shredding numbness and emptiness, the raw agony that was pulsing through me didn't let me think or care about anyone, all that my world was shrunken to nothingness, the emptiness of my soul was one reality, nothing mattered anymore, nothing did. Everything had diminished, agony, that was all that I could feel. Cries after cries tore through my lips, tore through my throat, tore through me making me burn, shredding me, making me want to die but not killing me, dark spots danced in my vision before the darkness took me in its arms pulling me away from the painful reality of life, pulling me away from my in fortune, my motherhood was taken away but what do I do with this mother in me that was left in me, the mother who would never have her child, what do I do with this mother in me??!!!! Kill her too!! Destroy her!!!  Because if someone didn't she will kill me, her constant pain and agony would!  I screamed trying to vocalising my pain but nothing could express this utter devastation, nothing could voice this complete wreckage and destruction within me, maybe the gods had mercy on me, maybe I was dying, was my last thought as my eyes rolled back and I fell unconscious. . .

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