Chapter 17

Ten months later, the Chester Town University senior college students had just graduated. 

"Did you get to talk to Cameron?" I asked as she met me back in the shop. Hindi na ako sumama sa kanya as I thought to give her the space and opportunity to talk with Cameron today. She has been wanting to do that ever since, but she got no chance to do so when every time she was about to do it, palaging may mangyayaring ibang bagay.

"Yes, I did," tipid nitong sagot sa akin habang sinusuot ang apron na kinuha niya galing sa loob ng staff room. She was smiling when she came closer to me, putting her hand over my shoulder. "And it was nice. . . I've been wanting to do it and I thought I would freak out, but hey, it went so well. Hindi ko inaasahan 'yon, ha?"

"Oooh," I swooned, more interested in what she told me. "Care to share what did you guys talk about?"

"Babe, there are customers around, we can't talk about it for now," aniya.

"Okay lang naman," sabi ko pa. "Wala pa namang bagong customer."

"Alright," she said, preparing cookies and breads inside the display cases. "Obviously, I couldn't come inside the venue. Nasa labas lang ako naghihintay matapos ang event. There were a lot of people and took me a while before I could find him. Honestly, I was about to back off when I saw him with his girlfriend and thought talking to him was nonsense as we've got our own lives right now."

"But you did, right?" pagkompirma ko pa.

Tumango naman siya sa akin. "Yes, as I told you earlier, I did talk to him."

***

Synestine stood outside the venue, waiting for the graduation to end. Halo-halo ang nararamdaman nito sa dibdib at hindi alam kung anong gagawin. Nagtatalo rin ang puso't isip niya kung itutuloy pa ba niya ang gagawing pakikipag-usap kay Cameron dahil ito na rin ang posibleng huling pagkakataon na magkikita silang dalawa.

She knew that he would go to Dubai and live with his parents there, and somehow would take him too long to go back to the Philippines, and she didn't have the luxury to wait that long. Naisipan na niya itong gawin para na rin kahit papaano ay maayos kung ano man ang namagitan sa kanilang dalawa.

Maraming tumatakbo sa isipan niya at kung anong sasabihin. She knew that once she faced him, she would be out of words. She tried composing questions in her head, but she was scared of forgetting them all at once.

Pinagpapawisan din ang kamay niya at hindi na 'to mapakali sa kinauupuan niya. Sinubukan niyang maglakad nang pabalik-balik habang iniisip ang mga sasabihin sa ex-boyfriend. Alam niya na hindi naman dapat ganito ang maramdaman niya dahil wala dapat siyang ipag-alala dahil no'ng nakwento ni Cholo sa kanya noon kung anong naging usapan nila ay maayos naman. Kinakabahan lang din ito sa magiging resulta ng pag-uusap nila at kung ito ay magtatapos on a good note.

Walang may sigurado, but she was hoping for it.

Nang may makitang ice cream vendor si Synestine ay bumili siya ng nasa apa. Habang kinakain nito ang ice cream ay mayamaya lang din ay napansin niyang nagsisimula nang magsilabasan ang mga tao sa loob hudyat na tapos na ang graduation. Mabilis niyang inubos ang kinakain na ice cream at pumwesto kung saan mabilis niyang makikita ang mga lalabas ng venue.

Synestine watched every student walked out of the venue. May ilan pa na nakakilala sa kanya at umawag ng atensyon niya dahil nagtataka sila kung anong ginagawa niya ro'n. Hindi naman niya sinagot ang totoong dahilan. Lumipat na lamang siya ng pwesto hangga't sa ilang saglit lang din ay nataw niya si Cameron.

Bumili ang kabog ng dibdib niya. Hindi dahil sa sabik siyang makita ang ex-boyfriend kung hindi ay kinakabahan ito sa kung ano man ang mangyayari once na lapitan niya ito. Nang lalapitan na ni Synestine si Cameron ay nahinto ito nang makita nito na sinalubong ng kanyang girlfriend. at that moment ay nagdadalawang isip na si Synestine kung itutuloy pa ba niya ang balak na pakikipag-usap kay Cameron. 

She was going back and forth in her head if she would break their moment, but eventually, she did.

Lumapit si Synestine sa dalawa at nagulat pa ang mga ito nang makita si Synestine out of nowhere. Pabalik-balik ang tingin ng dalawa kay Cameron at sa girlfriend nito. At the back of her mind, ito na nga ba ang iniisip niya kanina, mawawala lahat nang isinaulo niyang mga tanong kapag kaharap na niya si Cameron.

"Congratulations, Cam. . ." pagbati pa nito, ramdam naman nila ang awkwardness na namamagitan sa kanilang tatlo. "Would it be possible to talk to you? It would be quick, I promise! I've been wanting to talk to you and before I can't see you anymore, I hope you will give me a chance."

Nagkatinginan pa silang dalawa bago nakakuha ng sagot si Synestine. 

"Alright, it's okay. We've got time," sagot ni Cameron. "I'll meet you there, babe."

"Okay, I'll be with my parents, too. Be quick, okay?"

Nang umalis ang girlfriend niya ay pumwesto sila sa gilid kung saan hindi sila maaabala ng ibang taong dumadaan. Huminga si Synestine nang malalim at napansin naman iyon ni Cameron.

"Congrats, again! Hindi mo man nakuha ang Latin honors, you did well," panimula pa nito.

"Well, I wasn't a good student after all." Ngisi pa nito. "But, thank you. I appreciate that."

"No problem. . . So, I came here because I wanted to talk to you, not because I wanted you back in my life. No, hindi 'yon. I wanted to see and talk to you because how we ended things before didn't end well."

"Oh, okay. . ." Cameron uttered, nodding his head. "Don't worry about it, Sy. We've moved on and are both happy about our lives right now."

"I know that, but I also want to say sorry,"  Synestine said, bowing her head as if she was avoiding his stares. "I felt like I was the one who was at fault for why we had to break up and end things so suddenly. I admitted now that even though we were in a relationship before, I've had my eyes on Pocholo, and I kissed him during that campfire party. I lied to you and you didn't deserve that. I'm so sorry and I hope you will forgive me."

"Hey, Sy," anito at saka inabot ang kamay ng dalaga. "What happened back then is in the past right now. We were so in love with each other, but I knew we wouldn't last long. I've had feelings that I try to avoid and believe I could work it out with you, pero hindi pala. I was wrong and I shouldn't have put you in a situation where you couldn't be yourself. I was at my fault, too, Sy. I wanted the best for me and I wanted your best for me, and I can't do that. That was wrong. I'm sorry, too, Sy."

She was left speechless as she wasn't expecting to hear those words from Cameron. Ang nasa isip niya lang ay magso-sorry siya at aalis na si Cameron.

"Thank you for being a part of my life, Cam. You've taught me things. A lot of them actually."

Cameron chuckled, scratching his temple. "Well, I could say the same thing to you. You made me feel the love I deserve. You did a lot of things for me that I wasn't sure how I would do the same thing to you. I appreciate you, Sy. . . I wish the best for you and Pocholo."

"Same to you and Des."

"Thank you. . . I gotta go now. They must be waiting for me. May pupuntahan pa kasi kami and they'll be mad at me. Kilala mo naman ang parents ko. Ayaw nang pinaghihintay sila."

Synestine giggled, nodding her head. "Yeah, I feel you. . . Thank you, too, Cam. See you when I see you. . ."

"See you when I see you, Sy. . . Can I have a hug?"

Synestine nodded. "Of course. . ."

Si Cameron ang lumapit kay Synestine at binigyan ito nang mahigpit na yakap. Hindi iyon nagtagal ng sampung segundo. Nang humilay si Cameron sa pagkakayakap sa kanya ay mabilis din itong naglakad palayo at sinuong ang mga taong lumalabas ng venue.

Nang mawala siya sa paningin nito ay ngiti na lamang ang naiwan sa labi niya. Napahugot ito nang malalim na hininga at saka niya naisipang umalis na at pumunta sa shop para tulungan ang boyfriend.

***

"So, hindi mo tinanong kung anong gagawin niya after graduation?" tanong ko pa sa kanya.

Kumunot ang noo nito saka umiling sa akin. "No. Hindi na, 'no. Hindi ko na siguro kailangan pang tanungin 'yon. Masyado ng personal kung tatanungin ko pa. I wouldn't be a part of his future anyway. Bakit kailangan ko pang itanong. Hindi niya rin naman ako tinanong so quits lang, 'di ba?"

Bahagya akong natawa. "May point ka naman. Ang dapat nating pagtuunan ng pansin ay ang future nating dalawa."

"Korek ka riyan," pagpunto pa ni Sy. "We'll be doing a lot of things. Next school year, it would be our senior year na and finally, pwede na ako magkaanak."

Nanlaki ang mata ko sa sinabi niya. I was busy cutting the brownies at muntik ko nang maisama sa paghiwa ang daliri ko dahil sa sinabi niya. Natawa naman siya sa naging reaksyon ko.

"Seryoso ka ba?" tanong ko pa, pero hindi niya ako sinagot kung hindi ay ipinagpatuloy niya lang ang mapaglarong ngiti. Umiling-iling pa ako. "I think that's too early to have a child. Let's plan it well."

Hindi niya pa rin ako sinagot kung hindi in-attendan niya ang isang customer sa counter. 

I'm not sure what was going on in her head, but the fact that she wanted to have my child, I couldn't help myself but think that this is real and it's happening. This is my life now and I can't wait to build our own family.

We're still young and we've got a lot of things to learn along the way. I think having a child at an early age would be an impulsive thing to do. We should get married first before all those things could happen.

Maybe, I should plan that now. Tomas can help me about it. At least, having a baby would be reasonable after marriage.

I guess that's the plan after all.