And if you feel you're sinking I will jump right over into cold, cold water for you.

My alarm went off. I vehemently turned it off and went into my bathroom. I turned on the shower and got undressed. I got into the shower and washed myself and shaved. Today was the ALDC Christmas Master Class and I was so excited. I threw on a black ALDC bra top and black booty shorts. I brushed my teeth and grabbed an Apple then headed out the door.

When we arrived, Abby greeted us. She directed us to go to studio B for the class. We nodded and followed directions. We first stopped at the den to set our bags down. I put on my tan jazz shoes, Maddie put on pirouettes, and we entered the studio.

We did a really fun jazz/acro piece to Jingle Bell Rock. There were a few special parts in it, and I had one of them. My special part was- a la seconds, axel, then a tumbling pass that goes: Roundoff double back handspring back Ariel.

After the 3 hour master class, 20 sweaty out-of-breath dancers spilled out of the studio. I was almost out the door until I heard somebody say my name.

"Kenzie!" The voice said. Out of instinct, I turned around to see no other than Tyler.

"Tyler! W-what are you doing here?" I asked.

"My little sister dances here!" He said excitedly.

"Nice!" I gave him a big hug, and he kissed me on the cheek. My heart melted. I heard my mom call my name and my smile turned into fear real quick.

"I, um, I have to go. Bye!" I said nervously as I ran out of the studio. I didn't give him a chance to say bye back.

"Where were you?" My mom asked.

"I uh, forgot my phone." I responded.

"Dumbass bitch, you should know better. We have places to be. Next time it's mine. Now shut up." She scolded. Damn.

My phone went off and I quickly covered it so mom or Maddie wouldn't hear the noise. Luckily the music was blaring, so they didn't. It was Tyler.

Tyler: Hey babe, you alright?
Kenzie: Yes babe, I'm okay. Just in a hurry (:

Yeah. In a hurry to get beat.

Tyler: alrighty. You did absolutely amazing in that class. I would break my back if I did any of that.
Kenzie: haha, you're sweet. Thank you xoxo
Tyler: I gtg. I love you
Kenzie: I love you too! (:

He made me so happy. Every time I thought about him, my heart would race and I would unknowingly smile. I guess it was noticeable, because Maddie commented on it.

"Why are you smiling, dork?" She said with a scrunched up face.

"None of your business." I said with anger.

"Mackenzie, stop it! God you're so stupid." My mom interrupted. Ugh. Always taking her side.

When we got home from dance, mom grabbed my ponytail and dragged me inside. She whipped me with a belt and punched my arm repeatedly. Tears exploded out of my eyes. The worst part is, Maddie just stood there and watched. No expression on her face. She doesn't care about me, she never will. I was punished with no dinner and was sent to my room. Luckily, I always keep snacks in my room for these kinds of nights. But I wasn't really hungry... All I can think about is Maddie standing behind mom as she beat me. I remember whispering "help" and crying, looking right at her. She just stood there. I pulled out my diary and wrote an entry.

Dear Diary,
My depression has gotten worse and worse. Although I now am in love with Tyler, and he makes me so happy, I can't handle life everywhere else. I'm only okay with him. Why am I like this? Why am I so fat, ugly, depressed, and abused? I was beat tonight, and not even my big sister cares to help. Not when I have pain and fear in my eyes crying. She doesn't care about me, so I shouldn't care about her. I really want to talk to her but I just can't find the courage. You know what? Fuck that. Here I go.

I closed my diary and put it under my mattress. I walked over to Maddie's room and knocked on her door. She yelled for me to enter but when she saw my face she said get out. I ignored her and sat on her bed. I looked down and began to cry, when I looked up at her she laughed.

"Why the hell are you crying?" She said.

"Because of YOU. You're my big sister Maddie. You're supposed to care for me like no one else. When I am hurt, you're supposed to help me up. I begged for your help, and you just stood there. You watched, which you never do. Why? Why are you so fucking horrible?" I yelled. She looked hurt, but tried to hide it.

"Mackenzie, I-"

"No. goodnight, Maddie." I walked out of the room sobbing. I ran to my room with blurry vision. I wanted to cut so bad, but I collapsed on my bed and couldn't get up. Everything went black and then I woke up the next morning.