--Wendy's POV--

I'm waiting in the mall for something to fall for the nacho trap. I mean, Dipper did last year, so... This time Robbie made it and was prepared on the far side of the cafeteria. I don't know where dad and my brothers, though they might have dug an apocalyptic bunker in the backyard... That's what I'm hoping for. I sighed a bit and heard voices approaching. I couldn't see who it was, though. Robbie and I dashed into positions without a second thought, hiding from whoever it was.

"Oh, my gosh, Papa! Nachos!" Someone shouted in joy, dashing toward the trap. He sounded like a seven-year-old, almost squealing in excitement.

"WAIT, BILLY! I WANT SOME!" a more masculine voice huffed, following the younger voice, panting.

Someone sighed, "well you'd better share them." even though she was shouting across a mall during the apocalypse, she sounded more... Intelligent than the other two.

"Mama! Mama! While we'we hewe, may I get some waffles?" A voice that sounded like a five-year-old on a sugar high chirped

"If they have any in the back of the food court, you can."

"Mama, whewe do you think Spencew went?" The five-year-old asked, loudly. 

"He can take care of himself, he's smarter than all of us, remember?" The woman, who I'm assuming is their mom, replied.

"BILLY! I'VE FOUND YOU!" Someone shouted from the far side of the mall. There was the sound of someone running, then the rope trap triggered. I looked to see a fat bald man, a guy in a medic suit, squiming away from a girl in an "I love Billy" t-shirt.

"GERTRUDE! GET ME DOWN FROM HERE THIS INSTANT!" The fat bald gut shouted, crossing his arms.

"How'd that even suppowt youw weight?" The five-year-old voice questioned.

"Sally, your grounded." The bald man huffed. "No shrinking Billy into a barbie doll for a month." The medic suit guy cheered, despite having a most-likely-a-stalker girl trying to hug his neck.

"NOOOO, PAPA!" She cried. A woman with ginger hair and a green sweater walked over and cut down the rope trap with a crowbar.

"Next time check for traps. We can't afford any more deaths... Sue was enough."

"I don't know why it isn't working!" The seven-year-old voiced medic cried out as he fell, "he respawns faster than the rest of us! AND I WAS RIGHT THERE!" The ginger lady sighed and patted his back, sharply looking to the bald guy for support. He just joined the pity party, grumbling possible words of encouragement. 

By then Robbie and I were just watching, dumbstruck. They were the craziest, possible most dysfunctional family in existence if they were even all related.  "Come on, Sally. Let's get you some waffles." The ginger called to an unknown person. A girl in her early twenties, tops, dashed in wearing a tutu and holding an empty toaster gun thing.

"Good! I'm outta ammo! Awe you coming, Papa?" The said in her squeaky five-year-old voice. I realized they were coming back, and I signaled a retreat to Robbie, who was watching in terror as the bald guy literally chugged our nachos

"Inna minute. Imma bit busy." He mumbled, "Jalapeno cheddar sausages would taste so good with this..."

"Fine..." The lady began walking toward me and I froze, not knowing what to do or where to hide. The woman turned the corner and looked me up and down. "Oh, hello! Do you happen to know where the waffles are?" She acted like she was at a grocery store talking to one of the employees. I looked to Robbie for help, and he just ran around to reach me the back way, as to not run into... Whatever the medic guy and girl were doing. He was running and screaming for his life while she kept screeching things about loving him.

"Uh... No... Sorry. Check the breakfast foods, they might be in there."

"Thanks! If there aren't any left, though, I suggest you run." She said, pulling the tutu girl into the back. "Oh wait! Sorry! I'm Mama Gertrude, this is Sally," Sally smiled and waved. "The fat guy eating all your nachos is Papa and the boy running from Maddie is Billy."

"Thanks? I guess?" I started backing away, "why should I run if we don't have any?"

"Because Sally's this close to turning into a demon and ripping out all our throats..." She saw my horrified expression, "don't worry, we can take her. So what's your name?"

"Wendy... This is Robbie." I said, grabbing him as he ran over. She nodded, then scrunched her eyebrows together as is thinking about something. Sally dashed past her and began looking for waffles, I think.

"I think that Billy's deal with Bill had something to do with you two..." She thought about it, "Billy! What was the deal you made?!" She shouted to across the mall.

"KNOCK OUT A GINGARIAN NAMED WENDY AND TAKE HER TO BILL, AND HE'D GET RID OF MADDIE-FRIEND."

"There's a Gingarian named Wendy back here, you think she's the right one?" There was a pause, and I looked to Robbie, raising my baseball bat to knock her out. She disarmed me and had me on the ground in seconds, I don't even think she was looking!

"Don't go trying that, sweetie." She whispered in my ear, "I'm the best crowbar wielder this town has seen, and I won't be afraid to kill you." I stopped struggling. Robbie almost came over to help but he was shot in the face by a couple of frozen waffles and conked out.

"I'm coming, Mama!" The boy shouted, skidding into the room, "is this Wendy?" He pointed at my face. Gertrude confirmed it and the guy picked up my bat and did a test swing.

"I should've knocked you all out with the bat the moment I saw you." I spat.

"Sweetie, you might've been able to knock one of us out, but you have no idea what you'd be messing with. Us Acachallas fight together." She said, her once comforting tone turned sour at the mention of attacking her family. The boy swung the bat at my face, I began to bleed from my nose.

"Whoops! Sorry, I missed." He apologized and swung again, and that one knocked me out cold, the last thing I saw was the Sally, screaming and clawing Robbie in the gut, while he lay, cold.

And unbreathing.

(Confirmed Casualty- Robbie Valentino)

--Suess' POV--

Spookers a pretty cool dude. He hasn't even noticed he's bleeding out his arm... It's kinda scary, though. Every once in awhile, a thing will try to attack us, and we'd all have to tag team it, like in video games! It's pretty awesome, but every once in awhile the Spooker will get pretty spooky. Once, a demon tried to cut his cat, and the guy literally banished that thing to Mordor and then afterward made a portal to get rid of the rest of the things. It was pretty legit, but I think that cat thing may or may not be slightly possessing him.

He also doesn't like Mabel much or something. Every time she gets near him, he goes back over to me, and if I'm near Mabel he goes to Stanley and Stanford or to Dipper. I asked him about it once and he just said he was technically an Acachalla despite not paying the family fee in full.

It's weird, but Dipper and Mabel seemed to understand, Dipper broke it down for me. Maxwell wants to kill all Acachallas, so Spooker's on the watchlist, despite already being dead. 

It took us forever, but we got to McGucket's hill to see Maxwell waiting. Spooker gasped and teleported away before anyone could stop him. Maxwell floated over, "Howdy." He said, tipping his hat, "you got something I want, and you'd better give her to me. Anyone who tries to oppose me gets to meet my bullets, and they're quite rough." 

We froze, and Mr. Stan was about to oppose when Mabel agreed to it, "what's the worst that can happen, right? He'll stay out of your way, too. That'll be helpful, right?" She smiled a sad smile and Maxwell disappeared.

He took Mabel with him.

Spooker came back soon after, apologizing constantly for disappearing. Mr. Stan tried to punch him in the face with his brass knuckles, but he dodged and sudo flipped him. "Sorry!" He yelped afterward, "I live in Ghost's kitchen, you should see the guy sleepwalk." He chuckled, "it's bad... Ooh! Once, he literally killed me with a knife!" He nodded, "Again, it's pretty bad."

"Shut yer yapp." Mr. Stan groaned, standing up, beginning to walk back up the hill. Spooker followed obediently, and Dipper, Mr. Ford and I trailed behind. It was a lot quieter without Mabel around. Spooker kept leaving and coming back, each time getting more startled. After his maybe seventh time, Mr. Ford tried to grab his arm, and his hand went through Spooker. Still caught his attention.

"That's... Kind of a rude thing... To do... Have someone try to grab you and stuff when you're a ghost... It's just... Rude." Spooker said, "sorry I didn't tell you sooner but three times or more is just..." He shuddered.

"Where have you been going?" Mr. Ford asked, loudly.

"Just behind those trees." He pointed to a nearby clump of woods.

"Why?" Dipper asked cautiously.

"To keep an eye on Johnny-not-Johnny Ghost." Spooker shrugged, "I don't know. He looks like Ghost when he get's sleep deprived."

Dipper froze in horror, "Darker hair, paler skin, redder eyes?"

"Yup! And a knife and a crazy attitude. He knows we're here, actually." He paused. "Kitty says I should go..." He almost left again when Dipper threw some salt on him. He began to scream in agony and teleported away, steaming.

"What was that about?" I asked, confused

"I didn't trust him. Salt hurts ghosts, so I just picked some salt rocks off the ground, just in case." He said, "we should run now. If Spooker was telling the truth, there's a psychopath who has killed families behind those trees."

"Wait, Ghost's a murderer?"Mr. Ford asked, beginning to jog with Dipper, who shook his head.

"No, he went by 'Jimmy Casket' when I ran into him," Dipper said, starting to speed up. Laughter began to echo from the woods. "He's apparently killed Sally's whole family, not the Acachallas. She said whoever didn't die then was either dead now or really weird."

"True..." A girl said from behind me. I ran to catch up with the dudes, and I turned to see a... French girl?

She had bright orange hair tied up in a neat bun on her head, pink roses holding it up. Her face was pale and ghostly, makeup powder clung to her face, making her red lips and lime green eyes stand out. She was wearing a long, sleeveless dress, with silky white gloves going up to her bisects. She had flower brooch in the middle of her dress's top. Her deep green dress was long and flowing, going down to her feet, and despite the fact that she was partially transparent, she shone with radiance and love. "I am Amiee!" she smiled, waving happily. "I sink I saw you on ze television box sing... I'm still not sure what those are..." 

"... Your that ghost that those Ghost Hunter guys are afraid of?" Dipper said, looking her up and down, "You look like a teenager."

"Ghosty says I'm fifteen, but, Toasty says I'm technically much older... I don't know anymore." She smiled, "do you know where sey are?"

We just stared at her, not wanting to deal with another ghost thing, we just said no, and she instantly looked crestfallen and left as quickly as she had appeared. "That was much easier than I expected." I shrugged, smiling.

"Ghost and Toast are apparently terrified of her, but you saw her! I don't think she could hurt a fly if she tried!" Dipper said, waving his arms at the spot where the girl just was. We had to drag him away, he was confused on how two adult men could be scared of a dead french teenager. 

We completely forgot someone was watching us from the trees, preparing for the perfect moment to attack.

--Toast's POV--

Spooker randomly appeared in front of us, covered in salt rocks and screaming in agony. We told him to jump in a lake, I think Sir meant it in a harsher way than I did, but in seconds Spooker was back, no longer smoking but covered in third-degree burns. "OWOWOW!" He screamed, rolling on the ground. He still didn't have his beanie, and he was bleeding from his arm, but apart from that, he looked fine, more or less, considering it was the End of the World.  

"Where the heck were you? I thought you were trying to kill Bill." Sir said, crossing his arms.

"I tried and he blasted me outta the sky! I got away without much injury." He hugged his stuffed cat, smiling despite the fact that everything around him was burning in a horrible bunch of hellfire. 

"So when'd you get the cut on your arm, or is that new?" Sir said, unamused

"Kitty got a rip... Does anyone have a sewing kit or a foot-long bandaid?" We both shook our heads. "Dang it! I thought you liked sewing, Toast!"

"I just know how. There's a difference." I sighed, "the closest thing to a 'sewing kit' we have is the sewing kit to bandage wounds. Not stuffed demon animals. Please, just don't even try." I said when he made a beeline for my backpack, "it's not like you can feel pain, right?"

"Well... True... But it's really really annoying to have blood spouting from my arm 24/7."

"... I think you'll survive, Spooker." Sir rolled his eyes, walking away. We didn't even know where we were going anymore, we were just looking for signs of life. We were jumped by this one really small kid named Gideon, but Sir was so done with all this crap he just got in a car and drove away. I had to jump onto it while he was driving. There was a guy sleeping in the back seat, but Spooker (somehow) banished him to the underworld. 

"Spooker why'd you do that?!" I shouted while the car sped along, ignoring the sounds of an army of possible delinquents following us.

"Kitty made me! He insulted Kitty! TO HIS FACE!" Spooker protested, keeping in his seat despite the car's swerving. 

"Where were you before this?" Sir asked, curious.

"Well I was with those Pines guys, and they were climbing a hill looking for a McBucket guy-"

"- I think his name's McGucket."

"Right. McChucket. So they're going up a hill and you were there you should know about this." He pointed to sir.

"No, Spooker that's just a serial killer who looks like me." He said, half glancing at me.

"I know that! Dude I live in your kitchen more or less, I know almost everything about you guys."

"That's debatable," I said, frowning.

"Well I know you do Macoroni sometimes, and Ghost takes medicine like old people do." Sir looked at him startled.

"I thought only Toast and I knew about those..." Ghost uttered, instantly flustered. Spooker just nodded, smiling widely.

The rest of the drive was silent, Ghost drove us up the hill Spooker said the Pines family went to. We almost swung off a cliff (twice) but apart from that, we were fine. We pulled up to the manor on top od the hill to hear shouting and commotion inside. I looked to Ghost and Spooker and they were already on their way in. I sighed, grabbed the keys, and followed.

What could go wrong?

Casualty counter

Sue Acachalla

Colon Ghostie

Spencer Acachalla

Robbie Valentino

Maybe more? I lost count...