Art by Moiyablochki

I know, I know I'm late! Blame X-com 2 for being addicting as hell to play. Especially if I mod it out of its marbles. It's like the Sims if it was turn-based, but with Guns and Aliens... As well as a tendency to ruthlessly try to murder your Skirmisher but nailing them with two full damage 35% shots in a row on Gate Crasher and Soldier's that can hit the broadside of a barn when their lives literally depend on it! But hey, that's X-com baby. Now back to your regularly scheduled(God I hope so) Chapter about fucking everyone's favorite Hellhound to simp over.

You know some might say having a blood pack with a Hellhound or hell any demon is insanely dumb... But you can definitely prove them wrong~.

You were sitting down one late evening watching something or playing a game when you get a call with the number 666 starting off the chain of other demonic numbers.

(Y/N): Oh boy...

You quietly said as you paused your game/show and answered the phone.

(Y/N): Hello, Joanna's morgue you stab them we slab 'em. How can I help you today?

Your joke quickly fell short when you heard the titular Hell Hound you had a blood pack with a sigh that made you almost feel her eyes roll. The reason why you had a blood pack with a Hellhound was mainly because... Well, you can't get Syphilis. Crazy I know, but you have no idea why you can't get Syphilis for some reason. Modern science can't explain it either which only makes it weirder. But enough about that stuff, You've currently got a grumpy Hell Hound to deal with.

Loona: Real original. Now can you come down here? Blitz and the two love birds are out doing whatever while I'm stuck here taking calls and nothing is happening with the shit on my phone. Could really use that fat dick of yours as a distraction from the extreme boredom.

She seems in a good mood. She didn't scream at you or threaten to rip your balls off. Normally she's pretty mad when she calls you... Of course, she is giving you a booty call so who are you to turn that down when You yourself had nothing to do other than kill time with your Show/Game.

(Y/N): Alright. When should I expect the portal to your workplace to open?

As if on cue a portal opened up... Right under you... Needless to say, you dropped down from the portal onto your ass in the I.M.P building lobby " Yep, she did that on purpose. " You thought as you got up and dusted yourself off. As you did this Loona was staring at you with a single raised brow and a bit of a shit-eating grin on her face.

Loona: Oh about right now.

She states with a Hint of sarcasm as you finish making sure you didn't break a bone or two.

(Y/N): Har Har...

After you said that she did some you really didn't expect... She giggled.

Loona: Oh come on... I was only teasing you a little~.

Ok... You were beginning to think someone had somehow stolen Loona's identity and is now trying to get into your pants... Or maybe Loona is just having a nice day who knows.

(Y/N): Alright, who are you and what have you done to Loona?

You jokingly state as you fully expected to get kicked in the dick by the angsty Hellhound, but you were again caught off guard... Not because it was someone actually replaced her, but because she started to blush heavily and got a little real for a moment.

Loona: Can we... Chat for a moment before we do this?

She asked in a polite why which shocked you to your core as you had never seen Loona act like this in all the time you've known here.

Y/N: Uh... Sure. I don't see why not.

As you said this you pull up a chair and sat next to her and simply listened to what she had to say.

Loona: Remember the time when we first meet? It was during a routine hit job on some crusty old geezer that killed one of our clients.

Oh yeah, you remember that. How could you forget? I mean you see demons killing a corrupt politician and his guards when they were in a Star Bucks... A Star Bucks you visited quite often.

Y/N: Yeah! I remember being the only one left alive after your D- I mean Blitz killed just about everyone but me. I still don't know why I didn't get shot in the face.

The hellhound giggled slightly as she recalled Blitz screaming out profanity and sexual innuendoes in your stone faces expression.

Loona: I think it was because you had the look of someone who couldn't give less of a shit if he died or not.

Ah yes, that was when you were working a shit nine to five job at a shitty office with an even Shitter boss that liked to gloat about his dumb ass car. Thankfully you have a much better job now working as a Proxy for Demonic hitmen. This was mainly because they needed a fallback in case that Man Slut of a Demon Prince needed his book back for any reason. Having someone on the living side of things raising Chickens to sacrifice so they can open a portal to hell tends to come in handy.

A/N: Well an office job will do that to you. I swear those places are just as evil as Hell itself. Still crazy to think Blitz offered me a job because he liked the cut of my gib when I flipped out and torched my previous boss's car with that flamethrower he had. That parking lot probably still smells like brimstone right now.

Loona giggled again this time a bit more loudly as she started to relax a bit which was a good thing. It made asking this crazy question that's bouncing around her head a little more easier for her... At least a little.

Loona: S-so (Y/N)... D-do you... U-um... Like me?

The moment she said that you felt like you were in a field of landmines. Normally Girls wouldn't mind if you said What and give them more context, but Loona wasn't a normal girl. She's a Hell Hound that can literally rip you limb from limb... Not that she would do that, but Loona was also... Well, Loona. She acts like an awkward teen when with a penchant for murder even though you've been 'Dating' for five years now. So, of course, you had feelings for her... Even if she can be a bit violent and can act like a Goth Girl that's over everyone's shit, she had her cute moments.

(Y/N): U-uh... You're uh...

As Loona dawned, a saddened look you let out a sigh and spoke your mind.

(Y/N): Loona, We've passed a barrier that most guys like me never get to. Even then I like you... A lot. You're a Helluva Girl.

Loona giggled a little after you said that. Mainly because she thought it was corny, but it did tell you that you also had feelings for her.

Loona: A simple yes would have been enough you dork. You didn't need to get all sappy on me.

Wow. She didn't call you Asshole... You could get used to this. However, before you could tease her about how nice was being toward you, she suddenly leaped onto you and knocked you onto your back which kinda hurt.

(Y/N): Getting straight to the point huh~? We were having a cute moment there~.

You teased as Loona let out a sinister chuckle as she starts to practically rip your clothes off.

Loona: Oh please~. If we kept that soft shit up I wouldn't be in the mood to fuck you~.

As she said this she finished taking most of your clothes off besides your Pants and underwear.

(Y/N): Oh admit it~. You like that lovey-dovey stuff~.

She giggled at your remark as she started to unbutton your pants. She's grown accustomed to the size of your Maxima Hyper Poon, but she can't help to lick her chops every time she sees you Giga Peen spring out. It was almost long enough to reach her Hellish Chesticles and thick enough to Stretch her Great Divide of Lust to its limit. In other words, she loves your Pounder of Love.

Loona: Not as much as the giant package you're carrying~.

You let out a bit of a moan when she started to stroke your Rock Hard Noodle with one hand and fondle your Meat Balls of Hot Loads. With each stroke, she delivered to your Ultra Penne as well as every tender squeeze of your Great Big Balls of Steel a wave of pleasure sent a jolt of pleasure throughout your Temple of Cheeto's, Fried Chicken, and Dew. Of course, as the Lusty Hellhound jerked off your Throbbing Tube of Womb Stuffing she grew more and more eager to stuff it within her Extra Moist Ravine. However, she soon stopped to your story self's confusion, but we know where this is going.

Loona: As much as I like jerking off you off~...

She paused before quickly taking off her panties and bra allowing her Jiggle Girls to flop out. Your Big Chungus couldn't be more harder even if you tried as the Sexy Hellhound positions her Awaiting Clam. One thing was clear, she was going to ride your Doodle Noodle like a horse.

Loona: But I think we should skip that shit and make a little crotch demon or two~.

Wow! You knew Loona had a crush on you, but this went from one to one-hundred real quick! N-not that you minded. To be completely honest you are on board with the idea, but you had No idea how Blitzo will react if you pumped Loona's Puppy Maker full of Steamy Cream.

(Y/N): Wait. Are you sure about this... If Blitzo finds out-

*SLAM!!! Plat!*

You let out a moan as Loona slammed her Pooche Pooky onto Long Barrel of Spunk Shooting... Which was most defiantly done on purpose to cut you off.

Loona: I don't really give a damn what Blitzo thinks~! I decide if I want pups~! Not him~!

And now she's going back to her old self... Though she's kinda right. Still, Blitzo is one Helluva imp, and when he eventually finds out you two make some crotch demon's one of two things will happen. A, he's going to cut your Prized Possessions off and turn them into a Toy for him and his Man Slut boyfriend to use... Or B, he's going to want a piece... You have no idea which is worse. But enough of dreading the fact you may or may not lose your ManHood! Back to having some fun with Loona!

(Y/N): Mmmmmpf~! F-fair point honey~!

You said with a bit of a moan as her Hellhound Vagoo was tightly squeezing your Joy Toy so tightly. You'd think after a couple of years of you two enacting the ritual of the Birds and Bees just about every other day would loosen up her Hungry Tunnel but no. Apparently, Demons are just built differently, and Soon she displayed some serious strength proving that point in its entirety as you felt like your pelvis was going to get crushed. She started to slam down upon Your Maximum Overdrive Dong with a little restraint... But not much.

(Y/N): G-getting a little Rough there huh~?

You said trying not to turn into a moaning mess as Loona uses her Cock Pocket like a hammer.

Loona: What's the Matter~? Can't Handle it~?

She teased while screwing you without mercy... So you know. How it normally goes when fucking a hell hound. However, you decided to spice a few things up by showing a little initiative.

(Y/N): Maybe~. Maybe not~. But I'm willing to take you up on that challnge~.

Loona dawned a bit of a grin when you said that. " Well well~. His balls are finally started to Drop~. Now I just need to get him to exercise. " She mentally said as you kinda hated that activity... Which explains why you're built like a soggy noodle made up of the formation Cheetos and Fried chicken while having Dew within your veins. But again, back to Sexy Fun Times with a very sexy Hellhound! You grabbed her hips and suddenly thrusted your Junk of Girth into her Unholy Slit of Happy-Fun-Time hard enough to cause her Wobbly Bongos to suddenly bounce up into the air as you start to fuck you Hellhound Wifu nice and hard.

Loona: Mmmmmpf~! Now we're talking~! Come on~! Fuck me like you mean it~!

Her unique style of pep-talking only spurred you on to thrust your Drum Stick of Love into her Mighty Cunt of Syphilis as you revel in Lustful glory! That and it just felt so nice to fuck your girlfriend... Who might be your wife if this keeps going.

(Y/N): Already on it Honey~!

You said through gitted teeth as you were fighting back your orgasm with thrust. After all, you didn't want to shoot off your Nut Suprise too early... Unlike the first few times, You and Loona hooked up. Thankfully your hard work didn't go unrewarded as you soon feel her Fleshy Clamp start to tighten a bit after each thrust and her moans become more vocal.

Loona: Ahhhhh~! You better cum soon~! Or-

Before she could threaten you with the fate of every victim of a violent Karen you put her into a lip lock which she immediately joined in as your climax's draws near! Soon your Omega Johnson would shoot it White Goo into the Baby Forge after one last thrust as her Tight Vally didn't allow a single drop to escape! All the while you two continued to kiss as Mega Knock Up Cock filled her Hellhound Pussy of Spunk Devouring to the brim with your Seed of Ultimate Impregnation! Even after both of your Orgasms finished You and Loona shared a VERY passionate kiss for a solid moment before breaking the lip lock in order to breathe.

(Y/N): I love you Loona~.

You state with the most sincerity Loona had ever received from a guy before... Besides Blitzo who calls her his Little Cupcake... Unironically of course.

Loona: I love you too~... Now shut up and double tap my pussy~. I still want my Crotch Demons~.

You chuckled as a slight smirk grows on your face.

(Y/N): With Pleasure Honey~.

And with that, You two start to fuck like wild animals yet again, and little did the two of your know... That Blitzo was watching intently from the windows with a big old goofy grin on his face! " That'a girl! Make daddy proud! " He thought as he watched you plow Loona Doggy Style.

...

Editor: Oh hey, it's the Editor here. If you're looking for the Authur he's in a bit of a bind. What that is... Well, let's just say he's in a tight situation.

*Cut to the Authur Literally being held at gunpoint by Chibi A/N for being late on EVERYTHING... Before cutting back.*

Editor: Yeah that... Anyways he wanted to say He hopes you enjoyed today's story and sorry for being late yet again. Also to stay safe out there. See you later... If I don't get shafted with everything else again. Oh, and the next chapter is obvious. But I have to be vague so here were go.

When you wanted to go on an adventure of Danger and Treasure, you didn't expect to get a VERY different type of Pirate Booty.