Art by Sssonic02

(Alright quick note, I'll be restricting the names of private bits down to one for now. This is mainly because I take way too much time thinking about names and I don't have a lot of time nowadays. Sorry for the inconvenience, let's get back to the story.)

*Snoring while tipping off the side of the bed*

Chibi A/N: WAKE THE FUCK UUUUUUP!!!

AHHHHHH!!!

*Thud!*

Ow... *Gets up and Rubs his eye* How are you here? Didn't I hit you with a frying pan?

Chibi A/N: I've been point-blank nukes. A frying pan isn't going to put me down forever... Now then Do the thing before Turning your insides into your outsides!

*Sigh* Fine... Deja Vu sucks...

Finally! After all this time you've found it! The legendary treasure of Dickens the 69th! Let's hope he didn't stash golden dildo's as a joke...

(Y/N): Geez! How many dick jokes can you fit in a puzzle!?

You shout to yourself as this Dickens the 69th was clearly aware of their unique position within history... Which of course existed well past his death as he was really good at hiding loot behind Puzzles, Death Traps, Lots and Lots of Platforming, and very on-the-nose riddles... It also didn't help that there were a lot of bad guys trying to get to the treasure as well. Thankfully nothing a little TNT couldn't handle... Seriously there were crates of the stuff laying around. Anyways back to the point, you were paying to whatever god would listen that this was the final hurdle. That you'll finally find the treasure around the corner... And when you did and say the treasure room...! You see nothing but empty chests that's been recently looted. Apparently, Dicken's had a back door to the treasure room he never mentioned... You can probably guess that it's wide open.

(Y/N): MOTHERFUCKER!!! All that time wasted on a fucking puzzles about Cock and Ball's just for someone to grab it right under my nose!?

You shout in pure frustration as you notice a note... A note with some very familiar handwriting.

(Y/N): Oh please don't tell me she found out...

Every cell in your body is hoping beyond hope that that Bandicoot girl didn't find out. You two have a... Bit of a Close rivalry going on which has been getting ever closer in ways that often left your legs numb for the rest of the week. Bandicoot Sex Drives are terrifyingly high and they can be very persistent when it comes to a mate they like... And man does Tawna like you.

(Y/N): Alright... Let's see if my Willy Wang will get punished or not.

You pick up the note and started to read it. And much to your chagrin it IS from that damn Sexy Bandicoot.

Tawna's Note

Dear (Y/N) -

As you can see I've already been here and cleaned out the place. Probably for the best since it was nothing but Bejeweled Dongs and some very Questionable Jeweled Plugs. Now I could just tease you with even more riddles, but I think you've suffered enough with those dirty puzzles. Come over to the nearby Hotel... See you soon~.

Tawna~.

End of Tawna's note

You let out a long sigh as you've pretty much been bested again... Of course, that mention of a nearby hotel sparked you to ask a question.

(Y/N): There is a Hotel nearby? I thought this place was miles from civilization.

You mentally thought as you took the Backdoor Twana used... And once you made it to the top of the stairs, You see a goddamn town in view! Seriously you thought this treasure was a Secret!

(Y/N): Wow... How did I not notice that?

Your voice with laced with the Tone of someone that is thoroughly done with this shit and you're pretty much wanting to get your Peenie Linguine flatting over with, so you took a deep breath and made your way to the town.

A few very Strenuous Moments later...

(Y/N): I sware to god if another barrel is hurled at me...

You quietly said to yourself as you had to run from Monkey People throwing Barrels of Bananas at you seemingly just for fun. And here you thought it was just Bandicoots that are crazy. But that's behind you now, now you're in front of the hotel door where Tawna was staying at... Fittingly numbered 69... Of course...

*Knock Knock.*

*Creeeeeek...*

You let out a sigh when the door opened when you knocked. Of course, she'd leave it open... You're most likely to get ambushed by her again. She tends to do that when she took something you were about to get, mostly Treasure. So wanting to get this over with you open the door and walk right in. You could hear the shower being used as you closed the door behind you and shortly after you heard Tawna.

Tawna(Distint): Be with you in a minute!

She said as a thought crossed your mind. " I probably need a shower too... " you mentally stated as you've been hiking through the thick jungle for a few hours now. Of course, the thought of hopping into the shower with he has crossed your mind... But you really don't want to make an absolute mess again. After all, the last time you two did the good old Shower Pounder in a hotel you got water Everywhere. The cleaning bill was outrageous! As well as totally justified.

(Y/N): That's ok! I'm probably going to take a shower after you're done! My pits smell like something crawled up my arm and died...

Tawna giggled as she would have done the Diddly Diddler with you in the shower if you joined in. She soon finished up and dried off... Leaving her clothes behind as she wasn't going to need them for what was going to happen next. She swayed her hips as she walked out completely nude and ready for the Snuggle Tussle... But her expression changed when she saw just how tired and annoyed you looked.

Tawna: Are you ok? You look like you've had a rough day.

That was the understatement of the year. You sigh and got up as you still plan on taking that shower.

(Y/N): It's fine... I just need a shower.

As you stated this you walked past her and enter the bathroom, shutting the door behind you leaving Tawna a little more than worried. She knows when the words It's Fine means quite the opposite. She started to think for a moment as she was trying to figure out what was bothering you. Soon as the sound of running water could be heard, Tawna started to think out loud a little.

Tawna: What's got him so down? Did I do something wrong? Or maybe something happened during the adventure...

As she kept wondering why you were very grumpy today, You were currently rinsing your hair out and thinking about this whole Treasure Hunter rivalry going on with Tawna. Well to say it's a rivalry would be saying a couple is an agreement between mortal enemies doing the Hanky Danky. At this point, it's safe to say you and Tawna are lovers in all but name. Which, aside from being contently bested, is why you're so frustrated as this strange relationship has been going on for a few years now. As you finish washing up you dry off and knew what you had to do.

(Y/N): Alright... It's time.

You said to yourself quietly before leaving the bathroom without your clothes as you're probably not going to need them. When you exit you see the Treasure Hunting Bandicoot lying on the bed looking up at the ceiling. She probably thinks the worst after you walked right past her earlier. Without saying a word walked over to the opposite side of the bed and lay down next to her.

(Y/N): Hey. Are you doing ok?

You asked seeing that Tawna was just staring at the ceiling stewing in her thoughts.

Tawna: Just, Bracing myself for what's next...

She said with a slightly saddened tone thinking that she might have fucked up somewhere. As a moment of silence passed she took a deep breath and let out a long sigh.

Tawna: Alright. Lay it on me.

She states with a slight quiver in her voice. You leaned over and whispered into her ear.

(Y/N): Would you like to Marry me?

Tawna's face lit up like a bright Red Christmas tree. She thought you were going to break up not propose to her! She was so flustered she sat straight up and gave your shoulder a little punch. Which caused you to sit straight up and grasp you're now bruised shoulder.

(Y/N): Ow! Hey! What was that-!?

Before you could finish your sentence Tawna immediately forced you into a deep kiss which felt like it lasted for an entry before the Adventurous Bandicoot finally broke the lip lock.

(Y/N): I'm... Guessing that was a yes?

After you said this Tawna gave you a slightly annoyed yet relieved face.

Tawna: Don't you ever make me worry like that again! I honestly thought you were gonna break up with me.

She stated with a hint of relief alongside an entire plate of annoyance. You can't really blame her though seeing as you were acting pretty grouchy today.

(Y/N): Tawna, I may get frustrated with you at times and even somewhat fed-up with being bested over and over again. But I'm willing to work through our problems. After all, Relationships aren't just happy endings. They're-

Before you could finish Tawna stopped you right there by placing her finger on your lips.

Tawna: I know, I know. Love is like building a castle. No one is perfect and we're bound to find problems in each other. And as Corny as this sounds, It's the ones that can work past their issues with their partners to better them and themselves that are worth the hassle. I listen to you when you ramble... Most of the time.

She said before removing her finger away from your lips and inching closer to your face until you were in kissing range. Not a second later you two were in a deep lip lock that surprisingly felt slightly more magical in some way. Maybe it's your sudden proposal or maybe it's something else. You and Tawna didn't care too much at the moment as you found yourselves in a fairly rare position. You were hoving over her and she was looking at you with those familiar bedroom eyes.

(Lemon Starts here.)

Tawna: Come here and fuck me already~.

She teased in a challenging tone. Of course, You and your Dicky Wicky were more than up to the challenge... The thing is You wanted to do a little foreplay first~

(Y/N): Why the rush~? We're just getting started after all~.

You stated as you started to rub our Girthy TNT Stick upon her Taco of Lust. Needless to say, you wasted no time in taking Tawna down the more gentle side of the Fornication Ritual which seems to be working as Tawna let out a slight moan as a slight jolt of pleasure quickly took her by surprise due to your Omega Pickle rubbing on her Red Button.

Tawna: Oh I'll so get you for this later~.

She said with a slight trailing giggle. Tawna was more for the Hard and Fast route rather than the Slow and Steady pace you favored. But she can't deny that she was still getting her Rocks off to your Special treatment. Though you can't go slow forever as you quickly started to speed up until you were at a moderate pace. You let out a moan as your Tickleish Snake was suddenly caught between her Thighs of Wompa fruit Destruction. It seems Tawna wanted to give you more of a challenge... or maybe she just wanted to see your Suspiciously Shaped Pipe ramming through her Meaty Pillers, either way, it felt amazing.

Tawna: Well~? Are you gonna Fuck my Tighs or not~?

Oh yeah, She was definitely challenging now, and let's just say you were more than down for it as you quickly started to thrust your Dongle of Mega Pen in between her Crate Smashers at a fairly quick pace. The pure Pleasure you felt from clapping her Life-Saving Ham Hocks was pretty amazing as to be expected. You had driven your Pogo Stick into her Meaty Gammons before... And Judging that you two are currently Engaged, Which leads to where those Rings are gonna come from but one thing at a time, You and Tawna highly doubt this will be the Last time. Don't think Tawna isn't getting her rocks off just as much as you, After all, your Massive Bongle Dong isn't called a Third Leg for nothing as your Shaft of Deliverance was rubbing her Sunday Topper in just the all right ways as she lets out somewhat stifled moans... Which you took note of and what good couple can't tease each other during the Adult Yoga Session?

(Y/N): Losing your grip, Honey~? I could go slower if you'd like~.

Tawna chuckled as it appears this time you had some courage. But if you were careful this Thicc Horny Bandicoot might decide to take your Joy Toy for an extensive and Rough test drive.

Tawna: Maybe you should keep going~. I Might Feel something~.

That made you chuckle as you knew she'd clap back, but man did she clap back hard. Still, you were kinda asking for that so you can't really complain. Not that you'd want to anyways.

(Y/N): I'll do you one better~...

Soon after you said that You pulled your Premium Prick and lined it up to Tawna's Moist Rift.

*Slorp!* *Plap!*

Tawna let out a moan as soon as the tip of your Piercer of Heaven kissed her Gate of Life. You wasted no time in moving your hips, but you wanted to go nice and slow first much to Tawna's chagrin. She loves it when you two start to go at it like Bunnies. She isn't going to complain though, the Slow Lane still feels pretty good.

(Y/N): Enjoying the Ride ma'am~?

You said in a coy tone as if you were a chauffeur for a celebrity or a rich woman... Well, she's technically a Rich Woman given all the treasure she plundered over the years, but that's neither here nor there.

Tawna: Good~, but It'd be better if I had some Wompa Fruit wine~...

As soon as she said that you felt Tawna's legs start to bring you closer to her. It seems she's getting ready for what's about to come next~.

Tawna: But a Deep Creampie will be a suitable alternative~.

Well well~. Looks like Tawna Really wanted to seal the deal. Granted she tried numerous times for you to Unload your Gen Juice into her Child Chamber, but you were worried that Tawna would bring any potential kids with them on her adventures. Now, however, at least you'll be there to supervise them should they dare to even attempt to touch a Nitro Crate.

(Y/N): Very well ma'am~. One Juicy Creampie coming up~.

You stated which caught Tawna off guard a little seeing as you never shot your Nine-month Suprise into her before... At least not in the right hole. Either way, you quickly started to Thrust your Impregnatior Cannon into her Poundable Slit of Penial Holding as fast and as hard as you could. Moans quickly started to fill the room(and out in the hall probably) as Tawna's Wompa Wompers started to bounce in a circular motion as you kept thrusting as fast as humanly possible into the Dimension Traveling Bandicoot. You and Tawna's loans were pretty familiar with each other at this point but it really never gets old with Tawna... Well, the Tawna you're currently going to town with, but that's another story for another time and you don't want to kill the mood with bad memories.

(Y/N): Mmmmmmpf~! Sorry for the Bumpy Ride ma'am~! I hope you~-!

Before you could finish Tawna basically grabbed you and quickly drew in a deep and passionate lip lock as your hips were pretty much on autopilot. When Tawna finally broke the intense kiss you both gasped for air as you could feel the walls of her Hole of the Supreme Taco tightening around your Mighty Bandacoot Smasher which started to throb hard. All that was needed was one last push... And Tawna Delivered.

Tawna: Breed Me Daddy~!

She said with her eyes rolled to the back of her head clearly enjoying her trip to cloud nine. As for you, Man those words really made something primal in you click as you started Hammering your Girthy Cock Rocket into the lust-drunk Bandcoot's Sweety Sweety Pussy Wussy harder and faster than you thought possible. That's not even to mention the fact when you were damn close to popping the Fastest White Cocktail of Love Tawna pretty much pushed you in deeper with her legs as you let out what felt like Gallons of Steamy Hot Cinnamon Roll Icing into her Baby Cannon 9000. A full minute passed and... As you expected you really made the sheets a mess. Tawna panted and giggled as she watched the Stream of Hot Creamy Nut Juice pour out of her Soon to be Exit Tube.

Tawna: Now that's definitely going to get me pregnant~.

She cooed as you panted and wiped the sweat from your brow. You chuckled as it seemed Tawna was satisfied with one round for the first time. You recalled when she practically drained you dry the first time you two went at it.

(Y/N): I'm shocked. You seem content with one round.

The Dimension-hopping Bandcoot chuckles as she didn't stop because she couldn't do a round too.

Tawna: Oh that's because Coco and Crashie will be after you once I told them you finally tied the knot... After all, Bandicoot girls love to share, especially when it comes to men~.

O-oh... Oh no. As your face turned pale as a ghost Tawna giggled as she gave you a wink as if to say Good Luck~. From the sound of it, Your are definitely going to need it.

*Slams down the Pen*

FINALLY!!! Ugh! It's Finally done!

Chibi A/N: *Absolutely Done* Fuck! How much shit just flew in our faces!?

Too fucking much. But that doesn't matter. This shits done and I can finally stop being myself up for not doing it when I'm working on something else... And Playing Cyberpunk...

Chibi A/N: *Sigh* For those of you who definitely don't know. This dipshit is making/Working on two books, but he's not publishing them until we finally finish a goddamn book! One's in Hell which I'll let you guess as to which media that came from and the Other is... *Sigh* It's-

You don't have to say it, little buddy. The Other book is about Saints Row 2 being Smashed together with Cyberpunk 2077... And Maybe... Ghost in the Shell. I can't tell you any more than that though. All I can tell you guys and gals is I get way too many Wild Hairs up my ass and pop out ideas like someone binging on Oreos.

Chibi A/N: Can we work on something else now? Actually better yet, let's hit the sack. I'm tired and annoyed... Mainly because I've got to put a body back in cold storage before hitting the hay.

Music to my... *Pauses for a minute* I'm not gonna ask... Hope you guys and gals enjoyed this chapter, Lord knows it's been stuck in limbo for too long... Anyways, Stay safe out there.