"What am I supposed to wear? What are we going for? Casual? Glam? Coming out to the society ball? What the fuck is it?" I asked, frustrated with Riley.

"Just nothing too over the top." She repeated herself.

"We have to go down in forty-five minutes. These are the fucking clothes. Pick for me." I said, almost crying when Riley sighed. My attention suddenly snapped to the figure leaning against the door when I heard someone chuckling.

"I think I should help." Hanna said, coming inside with her hand absent-mindedly caressing her baby bump.

"Please." Dani sighed in relief.

"It is not a ball but there will people and you want to look presentable." She told us as we sat back and observed her sifting through our clothes scattered all over Mason's bed.

"You can wear this." She said, turning Dani with a powder blue cinched dress with elaborate full sleeves in her hands.

"Yeah, it's perfect." Riley said, making me glare at her.

"Okay." Dani said and took the dress from Hanna.

"And you...." she said, mindlessly as she started looking through the clothes all over again, "Wear this."

It was the dress Dani gifted me on my last birthday. It was a white sleeveless dress that ended right above my knee and had beautiful colorful flowers embroidered all over it.

"How can you have this and still cry over clothes?" She asked, incredulously.

Smiling sheepishly in reply, I took the dress from her and hugged her, mumbling a sweet thanks. I rushed to my room with my dress in hand, groaning at the prospect of cleaning Mason's room before going to bed.

⤎❁⤏

After an hour's worth of fussing, I was finally ready. If Hanna didn't help us pick the outfits earlier, I would still be in my PJs and that's not a look I want to flaunt at someone's twenty-fifth anniversary.

Slipping on my heels, I walked out of my room, hoping to see someone, but it looked like I was officially late and everyone was already in the backyard.

As I walked down the stairs, I was hyper-focused on my steps and failed to notice the figure standing at the end of the stairs. That's why I collided with a muscular body when I reached the flat ground. The surprise made me stumble, and I almost fell back if it weren't for Ethan who wrapped his arm around my waist and prevented me from a really embarrassing moment.

"Oh, my god. You scared me." I breathed out as I clutched his shirt in my hand to keep my balance.

I expected him to say something witty, but he just quietly stared at my face with an amazed look, making me raise an eyebrow, which brought him out of his reverie. He shook his head as if to clear the fog.

"What are you dreaming about?" I asked, amused.

"You." He said, with an earnest look on his face. Ethan Knight had the power to make me breathless with the simplest of words.

"What?" I whispered.

"You. You look... beautiful." He said with a small smile on his face as his eyes jumped from my eyes to my mouth to cheek, as if taking everything in.

"Ethan..." I said, not knowing how to reply to such a pure compliment, "Thank you."

"I wish we weren't standing in the middle of my house right now." He said, as his eyes flicked down to my lips.

"Me too." I leaned forward and placed a kiss on his cheek. "But we are in the middle of your house and people are waiting for us. Let's go."

I pulled back from him and instead took his hand in mine. Sliding the backdoor open, the beautiful setup in the backyard mesmerized me. Liam and Ethan planned this whole thing. They coordinated with each other through face times and lots of texts, but the decorations were worth it.

There were strings of fairy lights hanging in such a way that they created a roof over the backyard. They left the center clear for dancing as soft music played in the background. There was a huge table with seats on both sides under the tree towards the left, with beautiful cream drapes and flower pieces. Just beside the table, there was a glass plate with 'Better Together' written on it. The place looked like a complete dream.

"This is beautiful." I breathed out as I struggled to take in the details.

"Thank you." He said, smiling as he watched his family and friends enjoy.

"Hey! You finally came down." Olivia said, coming towards us with a smile.

"Yeah, I did." I replied with a smile, "You look beautiful."

"Thank you so much." She said, smiling.

"Come on. Hanna is waiting for you. She wants to see how the dress looks." She continued and took my hand in hers. Without giving me a chance to reply, she started dragging me towards Hanna, making me turn back to Ethan with a guilty smile, which he simply waved off.

⤎❁⤏

Later that night, Grayson and I watched as the couples danced to 'Maybe this time'. It was Elizabeth and Vincent's song. Ethan's parents, Mason and Dani, Hanna and Liam, glided through the space with many other couples I didn't know.

"Don't you feel you're missing out on something when you watch people around you fall in love with each other over and over again?" Grayson suddenly asked me. I turned to look at him to find him watching everyone dance with their partners with a thoughtful look on his face.

"Honestly, sometimes I do." I said, agreeing. "But then I remember how this is only the pretty side of falling in love and I am not ready to face the ugly side, yet." I said as I watched Dani laugh at something Mason whispered in her ear. Her face lighting up as he watched her with a smile on her face.

"I wish I didn't agree with that." He said, turning back to me with his wineglass in hand and raised it. Clinking my glass against his, I raised an eyebrow at the frown etched on his face.

"Maybe you shouldn't. Maybe you should put yourself out there as they say." I said teasingly.

"Right. You are definitely the person I want that advice from." He said sarcastically.

"Hey!" I said, raising my other hand in a surrender motion. "I wasn't the one who brought up the whole missing out on love thing."

"True." He said, chuckling.

Before I could say anything else, my phone vibrated in my hand. Unlocking it, I saw a message from Ethan.

Ethan: My room. In 5.

Staring at his message for longer than necessary, I looked up, hoping to see him.

"Here. I'll be back." I said, giving my wine glass to Grayson, who simply raised an eyebrow at my exit.

Walking inside the house, I only noticed Henry prepping for the dinner. Other than him, the house was predictably empty. Passing him a smile on the way, I walked towards the stairs.

Reaching Ethan's room, I wrapped my hand around the doorknob and pushed the door open to reveal Ethan simply sitting on his bed, scrolling through his phone.

"What? You called me here to show me something on your Instagram?" I asked sarcastically as I closed the door behind me.

"Yes. Look, I found this hilarious video..." He said teasingly as he stood up and walked towards me.

"Haha. Hilarious." I said, walking closer to him.

Pocketing his phone, he wrapped his arms around me as I adjusted the collar of his shirt, which looked a little crooked to me.

"I've been dying to get you alone ever since I saw you walking down those stairs." He said as both of us started swaying slowly to the music playing outside.

"Trust me, I know." I said, playing with the hair strands at the back of his hair.

"Yeah?" He asked as he turned us around.

"Yeah." I said, pressing my lips against his.

Moving my lips against his as his arms around me tightened, I tugged at his hair, making him groan a little. I could taste the wine on his lips and I am pretty sure he could taste it on mine too. His tongue traced my bottom lip, asking me to open up, but I refused. Apparently, having had enough of my antics, he lightly bit down on my lip, making me gasp, which allowed him to slip his tongue inside my mouth.

Walking me backward, he pushed me down on the bed and followed my fall. He placed his hands beside my head to not crush me with his body weight, but still had his body pressed against mine in the most pleasuring way possible. My hands tangled in his hair when his lips moved down my neck, making my breathing turn harsher.

Pushing the thin strap of my dress out of the way, he placed a delicate kiss right below my ear, making me moan.

"Ethan..." I moaned, unconsciously digging my nails into his shoulder.

"God, I like you so much." He groaned out, making me freeze when his words finally registered in my head.

His lips paused on my shoulders, probably realizing what he said. Pushing himself up, he looked me in the eye worriedly as I blankly stared back. For a while, none of us said anything as we just stared at each other. He was probably waiting for me to run away while I was trying to figure out if what I heard was correct.

"I didn't mean that..." He said, tentatively, but I knew he meant that and he was only saying this for my sake.

"Could you...?" I said, looking at his body still pressed against mine.

"Yeah, sorry." He said, pushing himself up and sat beside me while I continued lying there staring at the ceiling.

"So, was that a heat of the moment thing or..." I trailed off when I felt his eyes leave my face, making me think I said something wrong.

Sitting up, I turned to face him as I watched him run his fingers through his hair, agitated.

"Look Iris, I really like you. All this time, I thought I didn't know what I felt for you, but I was just denying it. I really like you and I want more than these stolen kisses and hidden hugs. I never thought I would but I do." He said, looking frustrated with himself, making me realize he didn't plan on saying this but can't stop himself now.

"I still want to watch Harry Potter with you, but I don't want to be scared that it'll end and I'll have to go back. It's not enough for me, not anymore." He said, looking up to finally meet my eye with so much honestly that for a while I want to forget that he said this and continue with our kiss.

"I..." I trailed off, not knowing how to say it.

Ethan Knight just now said everything I'll probably ever want to hear from a man, but all I can think about is how this room is closing up on me.

Kissing each other was harmless. It wasn't supposed to bring us here. It wasn't supposed to make us feel things. We were playing around, flirting. Feelings weren't a part of the deal and yet, here I am listening to him confess his feelings and wanting nothing more than to just say it back.

It was like he knew my response before I even said it. Like he expected me to say everything I'm going to say.

"I am sorry, Ethan. I... I don't think I'm ready for a relationship. I can't do it. I am sorry." I said as I watched whatever hope I had left him with leave his eyes.

"I am sorry..." I repeated myself and stood up, knowing this is it. Looking at his face one last time to collect all the pain flashing on his face, I turned around and walked towards the door with my head bowed.

Instead of going back to the celebration, I rushed to my room as I felt many emotions rising in me. Walking inside, I closed the door and pressed my back against it. As I closed my eyes, I felt the tears I didn't even know I was holding leave my eyes. It was at that moment I realized it wasn't about what he said. It was about how I wanted to turn around and tell him I like him, too. That he means so much to me, I can't handle it. That's the truth. I can't handle it. I can't handle so many emotions at once and more than that, I can't handle anyone else's emotions.

I feared the inevitable heartbreak that would wait for me on the other side of the beautiful few months I would have with him. I feared having him for a few months and then likely not see him ever.

Suddenly, the darkroom didn't feel so comforting. Rushing towards the switchboard, I switched on the lights. As soon as the lights turned on, I saw something shine on my dresser from the corner of my eye.

Walking towards it, I saw a necklace lying on a piece of paper on the top of my dresser as I got closer. Coming to a stop, I picked up the necklace between my fingers and toyed with the pendant. It was a beautiful yet simple butterfly pendant. I placed it back on my dresser as I picked the piece of paper which was actually a note.

'I saw it when I went to buy my parents a gift and it instantly reminded me of you.

Butterflies signify beauty, and you make this world beautiful for me.

-EK'

⤎❁⤏

Well... that happened. 

I felt so emotional while writing this because I could almost feel Iris's emotions and that was overwhelming.  I really hope you liked it because I worked a little harder on this than other chapters. In fact, my friend had to help and read the drafts for me which I'm so so thankful for. Otherwise, I would've ended up posting a chapter that wasn't even true to my own characters.

You know who you are. Thank you. 

I'm so excited for you guys to see how this progresses because I've so many ideas that are going to infuriate so many of you.

Tell me what you felt through this chapter in a word.

On another note, please go watch THE BOLD TYPE and see how adorable and mature and understanding Sutton and Richard are! It's crazy!!!!

QOTD: A show or a new season you're desperately waiting for this year?

I'm waiting for so many season 2s. I am waiting on Fate: the Winx club, Bridgerton, Emily in Paris, Firefly Lane, Special Ops and I'm sure there are so many that I can't even remember.