ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ

friends with benefits.

that was what matthew and jiwoong were, except matthew found it odd how jiwoong was still extremely caring towards him, which made him the slightest bit confused. he made it clear that they could both continue to see other people, but jiwoong has been hanging around him and flirting with him more often.

nonetheless, he found himself on jiwoong's bike on multiple occasions, either heading to campus together, going to matthew's place for a quick fuck, or making out. it wasn't like matthew didn't like it. he did like it, even though the feeling was temporary. jiwoong made him feel good, his heart warm, and it was definitely better than seeing jiwoong with someone else.

he continued to take his pills, feeling a strange feeling in his body after jiwoong had knotted him multiple times. there was no way he could get pregnant since he was on heat suppressants and birth control. it must've been his hormones acting up with having an alpha around. his body wasn't used to it.

he went to the doctor one day after school, voicing his concerns to the doctor who was in charge of him that he frequently saw for his annual checkups. he was sitting on the chair, watching as the beta doctor punched in some information about him that needed to be updated.

"you said you were feeling strange inside?," the doctor asked, checking the boy's temperature, "you are overheating slightly. have you been taking your heat suppressants, matthew?"

the canadian nodded, fiddling with his thumbs nervously, "d-do you think it's because the dosage is not strong enough anymore?"

the doctor sighed, looking into the computer screen to check the pills matthew has been taking, "if you take any stronger dosage, it could potentially harm your body and you won't be able to conceive in the future when you have found a mate."

matthew nodded, looking at the doctor for more answers, "why is my body feeling this way then? am i going into heat?"

"have you been around an alpha lately?," the doctor asked, a smile appearing on his face, hopeful that his patient had finally found a mate after all these years, "being around an alpha can change your hormones and potentially trigger your heat since the dosage for these pills are low. and alpha's hormones are not to be messed with, especially if they're a dominant alpha. they might be going into rut."

matthew's first thought went to jiwoong. it was true. he had been around jiwoong quite often and they have had sex on multiple occasions. he could feel his inner omega changing. he even doubled the dosage he took of his daily pills in order to hide his sub gender.

"woohyun-ah," the doctor frowned, "it's best if you find an alpha soon. these pills aren't going to help anymore once you get older. you can't hide your omega forever. it's dangerous. even more dangerous than how extreme your heats are, but after an alpha has helped you through one, you'll be able to have your regular heat cycle again and it'll be safe for you."

matthew nodded, thanking the older male before leaving the doctor's office. it was true, he couldn't hide his omega forever. nonetheless, there has been multiple occasions where he felt his scent slip and get stronger, which was why he brought it up to jiwoong that he didn't want to do it at his apartment anymore, scared that jiwoong might smell him and figure it all out.

jiwoong was a dominant alpha, birthed from two alpha parents. he was the only alpha matthew wanted and it hurt that he wasn't able to date jiwoong, yet alone express his feelings properly. now, hes stuck in a friends with benefits relationship that made him feel somewhat content, yet lonely at the same time.

he needed an alpha. desperately.

"matthew," hanbin frowned, looking inside the cabinet inside matthew's bathroom, "since when did you take so many pills?"

matthew was busy eating his ramen in the kitchen, but froze when he heard shuffling from the drawer as hanbin inspected each container. he quickly rushed to the bathroom, closing the cabinet and grabbing the pill bottle out of hanbin's hands and throwing it back in and shutting it close. he stood in front of it, making sure hanbin wouldn't be nosy and look inside there again.

"matthew," hanbin looked at the younger worryingly, "you can't do this to yourself. you're hurting your omega."

"i can't just have my heat out of nowhere hyung," matthew mumbled, looking down at the tiled floors, "you remember the first time? it was so intense and i nearly got raped if it wasn't for taerae."

he shuddered at the memory, his creme brûlée scent smelling burnt as it filled matthew's bathroom with the two omegas in it. it was a bad memory in high school when he first came to korea. he only had hanbin and taerae as his close friends and thankfully, taerae had presented as a beta way before matthew did and was luckily there to fend him off against the alphas that were harassing him when they were on their way home.

"but you can't be taking all these pills forever, chu," hanbin sighed, rubbing the back of his head, "you've been taking so many pills— is it because of jiwoong?"

as if matthew was a deer caught in headlights, he looked at the older omega who was looking back at him with a disappointed look. he knew hanbin was skeptical about jiwoong being with him. he hadn't yet told hanbin or ricky about their relationship, but he's been smelling more and more like the alpha the longer he was around him that it wasn't that hard to not tell.

"fuck," hanbin cursed under his breath, putting his face into the palms of his hands, "matthew—"

"it's not because of him," matthew mumbled, eyes wavering, "i just wanted to take extra precautions since midterms are coming up and my hormones have been acting up."

hanbin couldn't buy it, clearly worried about his best friend. matthew has been acting weird and it made him frustrated how he couldn't help the omega. he's tried way too long to help keep the omega's sub gender a secret, but he knows its harming matthew in ways that he didn't know of.

matthew simply shrugged it off, ignoring the topic whenever hanbin brought it up again around ricky. he occupied himself more in his studies, going to his classes and occasionally seeing jiwoong wait outside his classes as the alpha practically remembered his schedule by heart now.

when jiwoong picked him up, it normally meant one of very few things: he wanted to fuck, he wanted to just randomly give matthew a ride home, or he had something in mind.

"jiwoon hyung," matthew approached the taller who was standing outside his lecture hall. jiwoong looked good today, his oversized black hoodie looked comfortable along with his black wide legged jeans that showed off his long legs. it was normal for people on campus to talk about him and shower him with compliments. matthew gulped.

jiwoong smiled upon seeing the younger in front of him, "hey. how was class?" he slipped his hand around the younger's waist, when a sudden unusual smell hit him in the face, "matthew"

"huh?" matthew looked at the older after being too preoccupied looking at everyone staring at them, "oh class was fine. it was boring since the professor kept rambling on something—"

"don't you smell that?" jiwoong cut the boy off, clicking his tongue in annoyance as he stepped away from the younger. he whipped his head along the crowd of people that were still getting out of matthew's big lecture. his nose couldn't tell where the smell was coming from, but it couldn't possibly be matthew. matthew was a beta. betas don't have strong, sweet scents like that, but more neutral notes.

matthew cocked his head to the side, not knowing what jiwoong was talking about until he smelled himself. his scent smelled stronger. he was able to tell that it came from him, but jiwoong was confused.

"fuck," jiwoong cursed, feeling a low growl come from inside his throat. his rut was supposed too be approaching in a couple days, but that sweet sweet scent made is smell as if an omega was approaching heat. his inner alpha had self-control but when it was this close, it was dangerous.

matthew watched as jiwoong struggled to control his breath, and he used that chance to run to the bathroom that was at the end of the hall. jiwoong's eyes followed the younger, watching him run away, "matthew! where are you going?"

he held his head in his free hand that wasn't holding onto his helmet, trying to calm himself and breathe, as people passing by stared at him, several smelling the strong brown sugar scent that was filling the halls. he repeated to himself that he'd go look for matthew after, closing his eyes and taking deep breaths to not let his scent get any worse and more obvious that his rut was coming.

meanwhile, matthew had finally composed himself enough to make it to the bathroom, getting into a stall and locking himself in it. he tried calming down, hand fumbling into his tote bag to find the pills he was supposed to take. he had already taken his dose in the morning. doubling it shouldn't hurt right?

he put the pills in his hand, three of different sizes and colors, and opened his water bottle with his free hand. once he had swallowed down all three pills, along with the water, he calmed down. thankfully, there was no one in the bathroom when he entered or else it would've been chaos. he took deep breaths, hugging his arms in attempt to calm himself down. the heat in his stomach was growing, and the pills didn't seem to work.

of course they wouldn't work right after you take them, matthew thought to himself. he needed to go back to jiwoong. what would happen if jiwoong had attacked someone or some omega had gotten to him? would jiwoong choose them over him?

"hey do you smell that?"

matthew froze, practically holding his breath when he heard an unfamiliar voice and the sound of a group of people entering the bathroom. he mentally cursed to himself. of all bathrooms he could've gone to, he went to the bathrooms that were separated by gender and not secondary gender. he clutched onto his tote bag with both his hands, trying to make his breathing stable. the smell of unfamiliar alphas filled the bathroom and it wasn't quite pleasant as jiwoong's.

"smells like an omega in heat" one snickered, making matthew tremble, "hey do you think they're still here?"

"this bathroom stall is closed."

"yo, hurry up and use the bathroom before gunwook gets mad we're taking a long time in here."

gunwook? the name seemed to ring a bell to matthew. it was the nice alpha he met at the party a couple weeks back that he unfortunately, never saw again.

"fine fine! it just smells good in here."

thankfully, the group of boys seemed to leave him alone after a couple minutes and matthew was able to let out a sigh of relief as he slowly unlocked the door of the stall. he seemed to have calm down after that but the bathroom still did reek of his smell. he slowly opened the door of the bathroom, looking around before walking out.

jiwoong was still down the hall and matthew's nose was hit with an strong smell of brown sugar, except it smelled burnt. matthew tried to assess the situation, seeing a male omega clinging onto jiwoong's arm, basically rubbing their scent all over him. however, jiwoong looked angry, his scent making it obvious that the omega was pissing him off.

"let go of me, seobin," he heard jiwoong yank his arm away from the omega's grip, to bring his hand up to his face. matthew knew jiwoong was holding on, controlling himself. jiwoong was approaching rut and he must've triggered it. having an omega in front of him was tempting, but jiwoong appeared to not be having any of it. jiwoong knew this omega, though?

the omega sighed, bringing his hand up to caress the alpha's cheek, "let me help you, jiwoong-ie. you're in rut. we've done it together before. you need it."

matthew froze in his tracks, unsure if whether his ears had picked up what the omega, seobin, said what he thought he said. they've done it together before? jiwoong was in rut. jiwoong did it with this omega before. but jiwoong doesn't do flings with omegas. he couldn't understand.

he clutched his tote bag tighter to his body, feeling his hands shake as his heart started to ache. he knew having a crush on jiwoong was bad. he shouldn't have never agreed to be friends with benefits with jiwoong. hanbin was right— the alpha wasn't someone he shouldn't be associating with. he was only going to hurt—

"matthew," the voice made matthew snap out of his negative thoughts. he looked up to see the alpha striding towards him, pushing the other omega out of the way lightly. the older grabbed him by the shoulder and pulled him into a hug. his head was digging into the juncture of matthew's scent gland, which by now was no longer emitting any scent but the neutral scent was enough to bring jiwoong's alpha peace, "where did you go? i— i was so worried."

matthew's eyes dilated, feeling the warm comfort of the alpha's arms around him. it was just what he needed and he felt himself calm down, his heart racing against his chest as he gripped onto the older's hoodie, "j-jiwoon-ie hyung."

"shit, i don't know what happened to me," jiwoong mumbled, still smelling a faint smell that he smelled earlier on matthew, "i still smell it everywhere. it's driving me crazy, matthew."

matthew didn't know what to say, feeling the older slip away and hold him by the shoulders. should he have told jiwoong the truth? he didn't want to lie to the older, but he also didn't want to cost the relationship they were in. what if jiwoong never talked to him again? he couldn't handle that. his omega would be so heartbroken.

"hyung i—"

"is that your new fling?," he heard the omega behind jiwoong speak up, grinning at the both of them, "a beta won't help you with your rut, jiwoong-ah."

jiwoong's hand slipped down his shoulder, one hand still gripping onto his helmet tightly while the other one held onto matthew's wrist as he turned around to face the boy, "i don't care."

"you need an omega, jiwoong," seobin chuckled, crossing his arms as he turned around to walk away, "call me if you need me."

jiwoong clicked his tongue in annoyance, rolling his eyes at what the omega said. it was a good idea to break up with omega, who was cheating on him in the first place. he should've known omegas were cheating fuckers, spreading their legs for anyone and using their sweet scent to attract any alpha.

"h-hyung," matthew looked down at his wrist that was being held tighter, "it hurts."

jiwoong snapped out of his thoughts, looking down and loosening his grip, "shit sorry. don't listen to him, yeah? lets go now."

matthew couldn't let his feelings get the better of him. jiwoong doesn't like him. jiwoong was just using him. the omega was right. jiwoong was only with him because he's a beta. he spaced out the whole time jiwoong led him to his motorcycle, only snapping out of his trance when he felt jiwoong's hand on his cheek, caressing it softly.

"matthew," jiwoong looked into the younger's eyes, backing him up until the younger's butt hit the bike. matthew felt lost in the older's eyes, trying not to let tears swell up in his eyes because of all of the negative thoughts that clouded his head. jiwoong placed the helmet down on the edge of the bike, then gripping on the boy's sides to lift him up onto the bike so that they were eye level now, "spend my rut with me?"

"m-me?" matthew's cheeks flushed, never hearing anyone ask him that. if jiwoong didn't spend it with him, then who would he spend it with? he felt jealous at the thought of jiwoong spending it with someone else. he couldn't bare to imagine it. his heart hurt at the thought, even though they were friends with benefits.

they were friends with benefits.

jiwoong only needed him for sex, but somehow part of him felt like jiwoong was taking care of him more and more, regardless if they were fucking or not. he was always so gentle and protective. did he treat all of his flings that way?

"yeah," jiwoong breathed out, grabbing the brunette's chin softly. he placed a kiss on the boy's lips, then going back for a more harsher and sloppy one that left both of their lips shiny with saliva. matthew was weak when he was around the alpha. he couldn't help but agree to whatever jiwoong said. he broke off their kiss, gripping the older's hoodie to keep him close. he nodded in response.

"yeah," matthew mumbled, cheeks flushing red. jiwoong chuckled, pulling the boy in for another kiss. the heat in his stomach was already growing, a feeling he never felt when he was around other betas ever since he broke up with seobin.

matthew was different. or was it just his alpha talking?

ᰔᩚ 𝓼𝓮𝓾𝓷𝓺𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓼
𝓹𝓾𝓫𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓱𝓮𝓭: 01/25/2024 ᰔᩚ

a/n : my spring semester started today and im already dreading it :") i want to go back on break and watch my kdramas and write all these chapters for y'all.