Author's note: hello everyone! Glad to see you are all enjoying the flow and progress of the story. I know I still have so much to improve on but I am happy to have all of you enjoying this.

As I said before, this is going to be a two part series. The first part has two more chapters to its end. Before I begin the next series however, I'm going to be starting another story that I will announce at the end of this ride, so please enjoy. 

By the way people this is what i imagine Anya looks like 

Don't forget to vote and comment. Thanks for reading : )

Chapter 18

The rain was falling heavily as it has been falling ever since I left the house. I wondered idly, if P'Arthit had taken an umbrella when he left that morning and what he was doing now. Was he at the office working? My wedding... is today. It is only sixteen hours away. Will P'Arthit not come? will he not tell my father?

I was staring out through the window at the halfway finished setting in my mother's garden. We never found the right site, Anya and my mother were too picky, due to that, we were using my mother's garden. The rain was too unexpected and there was a chance we might not be able to do the wedding.

It didn't matter; I never planned to wed anyone today, unless it is P'Arthit. When the time came and P'Arthit does not stop the wedding and tell everyone the truth, I will call it off. Anya will feign sickness and then we would both be unable to wed, that way we do not ruin anyone's reputation. After that, what will I say to P'Arthit, what will I do?

The answer was clear; I will have to end my relationship with him. I will have to say goodbye.

I tried so hard, my heart took so much and I can't count how many times I nearly broke down and told P'Arthit the truth. Seeing him so worried, so afraid, and yet unable to do the right thing. I tried my best; I pulled every power in my heart, everything that I had, to do this, to make him want to fight for me. Did I succeed? Or have I failed?

I swallowed around the ball rising in my chest. If P'Arthit does not love me enough, and does not come through today, I will lose everything. I... I will lose all I had before. Would I be more satisfied then, happier? No, I knew if P'Arthit doesn't stop this wedding, I won't ever be happy again. Why do I love him like this? Why am I being punished to love so hard?

"Son," my father's voice was solemn.

"You didn't go to the office today, father?" I asked before I turned to take in his expression in the semi dark room. I was in what used to be a reading area for me and the sky was a dull purple due to the rain and I never bothered to turn on the lights.

"No, I will not be going," he said.

I lowered my eyes. If he does not go then P'Arthit might have to come here and talk to him. If he wants to.

"You don't look happy," he stepped some more into the room. "You haven't looked happy since this marriage came up."

"I guess I am terrified, I don't know if I am doing the right thing. Getting married is a big deal father," I said with partial sincerity.

"It is. Which is why we must think very carefully about it before we do it. Have you thought about it, son?"

I didn't immediately reply. His words left heavy marks in my heart.

"When we marry the right person, no matter how difficult things look, no matter how impossible they may seem, there won't ever be regrets."

I nodded at his wise words. "I know that, dad."

"I don't want you to have any regrets son. I know your mother and I have been pressuring you to get married, but we want you to choose someone that will make you happy."

"I will father," I said without thinking, "I mean I have."

He looked at me for one silent moment, nodded and turned back to the door. "Make sure your decision is the right one."

It was very hard to listen to my father. P'Arthit was right, my father only wants my happiness, and he could see that I am not happy. I lowered my head and breathe a sigh of relief that I did not tell him anything, then I looked out the window again. The water was rising a bit; my mother's perfect flower arrangement was getting ruined.

A few hours to the wedding and P'Arthit was still not here. I was dressed in my suit and pacing in my room like I wanted to wear a hole in the carpet. I don't know where he was. I was half tempted to go see him at home. We had quarreled the last time I saw him and he had, like always, failed to understand me. He doesn't hear the words I say to him and I can't seem to be able to get to him.

Was leaving him alone a mistake? But I had grown too weak, I didn't think I could have lasted through another one of his pleas. As the wedding date grew nearer, P'Arthit became even more desperate, more afraid, and I wouldn't have been able to keep from telling him everything.

Anya had told me why she had told P'Arthit that she was in love with me. It was meant to put pressure on him and if I had not seen the effect I would have asked her to correct her statement to P'Arthit. I would have told him the truth if I had to, but I saw the positive side to it so I told him she must have been joking. Anya was not in love with me and she certainly did not want to marry me.

"Kongpob," she walks to me even though the bride should not see the groom yet. If it was a real wedding that would matter, "are you alright?"

I looked at her, she was yet to wear her gown but her hair had been beautifully styled. She looked good but I didn't really appreciate the sight. My insides were jelly, my heart wanted to run out through my throat and the temperature was perpetually high.

"You don't look so good." She moved to me and cupped my face in both her hands. I blinked at her, completely startled. She has never done this before and there was no one to pretend for. "What is it?"

I pulled my face away and took a step back then I shook my head, "I am fine, just feeling a little tired."

"Kongpob, I know you are scared," she stated. "It's okay; you know that this is not a real wedding."

"Yes, that's not what I am worried about." I looked away from her and through the window. The sounds of guests were flowing in and a low beat music. My body wasn't able to calm down the more I looked.

"Anya, why hasn't P'Arthit called me?" I asked. "H-he should have by now, where is he?"

"Kongpob, P'Arthit must be in a lot of dilemma right now. He will be trying to make a decision and you know it's not easy for him."

"I know that but," I clenched and unclenched my fingers. "What if he chooses not to come, Anya, I can't, I can't do this."

She came and took my hands, "shh, it's alright. I've got it, okay?" she spoke softly to me and I was not reassured.

"Would it make you feel better to go see him?" she asked.

My heart skipped," can I?"

"Yes, only for a few minutes, I can wait here in case he comes and you can see what he is up to, okay?"

I hugged her. I could have kissed her if I could. "Thank you," I smiled happily and then rushed out of the room.

My mother stood by the hallway and she saw me running to her. "Kongpob, where are you going?"

I didn't want to waste time talking to her so I took both her hands and guided her out of the way, "I will be right back, Mom."

"Hey, wait a minute, honey."

I ignored her and ran out of the house but I soon heard Anya's voice so I knew she would be okay

I tried P'Arthit's phone despite knowing it was a bad idea. I knew I shouldn't see him, he is the one who needed to come to me, that selfish, pink milk loving jerk. Will I forever have to chase after you?

His number rang but he did not pick my call. He wasn't going to pick my call was he? I pushed hard on the pedal and threw my car into high speed. The plan was to check on him, see that he was okay and then return to the wedding. I was going to follow that plan, no matter what.

I rode straight to his house because I didn't believe P'Arthit would be working instead of trying to stop my wedding, I don't believe it. I can't believe that. So, I arrived at his house shortly and his neighborhood was as quiet as always and his neighbors indoors or out.

I stood at the door but I was certain, P'Arthit was not at home. His car was not parked anywhere I could see. Was he really working? I combed my fingers through my hair with a sigh.

I decided to go in instead of leaving; maybe I should wait for him a bit. In truth, P'Arthit might already be on his way to the wedding. I took out my phone in case Anya had called to confirm that but she hadn't.

With my spare keys, I entered the house. P'Arthit's apartment was home to me. I was familiar with its smell, the rough look it tends to get when I am not around to clean up. I loved this little space, it brought nostalgic tears to my eyes.

Perhaps this might be my last time in here. Perhaps I won't be able to call this home again. I sat on the bed because the wave of pain hit me too hard to keep standing.

"P'Arthit," I whispered. On the wall where P'Arthit had put every picture we've ever taken and some mementos from trips, I saw a white paper tucked inside. I stood up and took the paper and on it, I saw the words that nearly broke me apart.

Kongpob, I'm sorry. I tried to go to your father, but it seemed easier to see Anya and beg her to stop your wedding instead, that was when I realized that in the end I can't do it. I can't make you lose everything. I would rather you lose me, than your family and the life ahead of you.

You might hate me for this, you might never forgive me, but this is what I must do for you.

I love you. P'Arthit.

I covered my mouth as I read and I shook my head over the words. I just couldn't, didn't want to accept it. P'Arthit wouldn't give up on me, not like this. No, no way. No!

I threw the paper away and scrabbled for my phone to call him. Wherever he was I would go, I would beg, I would do anything. No, no, I just needed to see him.

Before I could make the call, Anya was calling me. Could it be that P'Arthit had gone there after all?

"Kongpob—"

I cut her off," is P'Arthit there?!"

She didn't respond immediately like I thought she would. "No, no Kongpob. You have to come back now, it is almost time."

"I can't, let's call off the plan Anya, P'Arthit—"I refused to let my emotions get out of control so I took a moment to get my voice to stop shaking. "P'Arthit has left me, Anya, he is gone and I need to find him."

"What? How, what happened?"

"He left me a note, Anya, he isn't coming to stop my wedding, he isn't... he isn't going to fight for me." I pulled in aching breath, "I need to go Anya."

"Wait! Don't go anywhere, I am coming to you now. We will think of something, okay? Kongpob, just stay right there. I'm going to help you through this."

I believed her. Anya has been the only one helping me, she would help me look for P'Arthit.

So I waited for her. It took her thirty minutes plus to get to the house. She opened the door and found me reading the note again. It was just as much torture to read as the first time, it was really painful.

"Let me see," she took the paper from me. When I looked up she was in her wedding dress. I was amazed that she had hurried here in that. She scanned the letter and then looked at me. "I am so sorry, Kongpob, I didn't know that P'Arthit's heart was this weak, I thought he would choose you in the end."

"Yes," I nodded, "he is weak, he doesn't love me at all. How could he do that? How could he?!"

"Yes, I know, it's despicable,"

"How could he tell me I love you and expect me to let him go?"

"What?"

"I won't, Anya, I will find him and I will make him say those words to my face." I walked past her heading for the door. First I would go to his office, then I would go to his friends, then his maternal home. I will find him.

She caught my hand. "Kongpob, wait, do you still want to be with him now?"

I looked at her in confusion. "You said if P'Arthit does not choose you, you would leave him." She raised the letter, "he did not choose you, why are you still going after him?"

"I have to Anya, I can't," I shook my head. It was impossible for me to explain and for her to understand. "You don't know what it is like, you have never been in love."

"Says who?" she said, her eyes focused on me. She sighed.

"Kongpob, there has been some... complications," she said.

"Complications"

". I didn't want to say this until after the plan but now that things are like this, I think I must"

"Can this wait, Anya?" I looked impatiently at the door not far from my grip

"No. I'm sorry" she cupped her face and fidgeted with her gown till I was frowning.

"What is it?"

"I lied to you, when I said nothing happened that night that you slept in my place."

"...what?" I turned fully to her. She couldn't meet my eyes and her voice started to change like she was near tears.

"You are my friend, I love you and P'Arthit, I want you two to be together, I would do anything to see that happen. I am doing this for your sake and I wouldn't be saying anything now either. I just never meant for this to happen okay..." she was really crying and I felt like I was going to collapse into myself.

"What are you saying to me, Anya?"

"I'm saying that I am so sorry. I didn't mean for it to happen but I was so drunk and you didn't remember."

"What are you saying to me," I repeated louder, my throat working with difficulty to take in air.

"We-we slept together Kongpob,"

"No," I shook my head. "You said we didn't, you said so when I asked you, you said that. Please tell me that it didn't happen."

"Kongpob—"

"Tell me that you are lying, that you are joking, that it is not true."

She said nothing.

"Please Anya! Please. I told P'Arthit nothing happened, that I would never betray him like that. I told him that I loved him and he could trust me. Please Anya, tell me that it is not true."

I was near tears and my heart was ripping apart.

"It is true, and I think I am pregnant."

"ah," I broke. I cried out and my tears fell without control, without silence. I cried so hard. Though I covered my eyes, the tears spilled over them and my mouth worked without words, only the sound of my crying, only the sound of me falling apart.