The house lights dimmed

The curtains drew back

The audience quieted down

Into the spotlight strode the show's MC

Ed Cellophane, one stern old tern was he

'Good evenin' ladies 'n gentlemen.

On ewr stage we proudly present,

straight from the agricultural wasteland,

that famous trio of singing ladies -

give a big hand to ewr, Magic Springtime Sweet Peas.'

The band played an intro

The audience roared

Delivering a thunderous applause

Spinning on the spot, Ed waved them near

The better for the audience to hear

'Now tell us just what are your names.'

The first pea smiled and said, 'I'm Shelly."

The others said, 'We're Snap and Snow.'

'And here they eur, the sister rappers

performing their latest recording, Two Hyper Vipers!'

Ed clapped his hands and backed away

Imploring the audience once more

'Ladies 'n gentlemen, The Sweet Peas!'

They took their place, toes began to tap

And the trio of voices belted out their rap

'We first came across one in the Garden of Eden

Eve was mopin' 'cause there was somethin' need'n

It slithered down the trunk 'o that tree

held out some fruit and said 'bite me'

The next was Cleo on her royal barge

This one was small, not too large

When she heard Octavian wanted to put her on display

She said, 'Asp, bite me.' Asp said, 'No way.

The boos began in the orchestra seats

Then spread quickly to the balconies

Ed hurried on stage, hands in the air

'Now- now ladies 'n gentlemen let's act ewr age

that's not we treat performers here on ewr stage!'

Ed folded his arms and did a spin

Placed his fingers on his chin

But his words were lost in the following din

He called for the lights so he could see

As he audience rose and roared, 'BITE ME!'

A/N: This was a silly parody on the old Ed Sullivan TV show - ouch