"Stay here in my heart."
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I sat on the cold floor outside of our apart.

I couldn't leave, But I knew he was still there on the other side of the door.

"Why do you say I wouldn't leave?" I say holding my ear to the cold white door waiting to hear his voice.

"Because it's not who you are." He whispers.

"You're not like her." He adds.

"You like being alone?" I said wiping a tear from my cheek.

"Am I alone though?" He says.

I sat there in silence trying to think about what may be my next step.

"I'll leave if that makes you come in." He says. I then hear him getting up and walking somewhere.

I wait a while to make sure he had left.

When I'm mad I like being alone surprises me he remembers that.

I got up off of the cold floor and walked into the apartment quietly so he wouldn't know I came in.

I tiptoed into the living room where on the couch he had left me my favorite pj's.

I grabbed the clothes and look in the hallway to see if he was in our room and not trying to sneak up on me.

I quickly but quietly rushed to the bathroom and closed the door.

I changed out of my dirty clothes from sitting on that gross floor and turned the shower on to warm.

I stepped in a let the hot water hit my back. It was just the thing I need since it was very cold today and the stress I had.

I couldn't help but think about what Joon said to me.

'I am selfish' I thought but my thought was interrupted when I heard the bathroom door closed.

I look out from the purple shower curtain and see a towel and a brush sitting on the sink.

'Why does he do this when I have been nothing but a bitch to him?'

I stepped out of the shower and grabbed the white plush towel he left for me and dried myself off then wrapped it around my hair.

I then put on my white T-shirt and Pink PJ pants. My favorite pajamas.

I took my hair out of the towel and blowed dried and brushed my hair.

I was finally finished and I snuck back out into the living room.

Just before grabbing a blanket from the basket and laying down on the small white couch.

I decided not to turn the TV on.

I know he doesn't like to sleep with it on.

I pulled the fluffy blanket up to my chin and just laid in my own thoughts.

Its what I usually do before bed is lay and think.

Think about nothing in particular.

It's hard when you have Insomnia.

It's not usually bad when Joon is home but I'm usually sleeping with him and he puts me back to sleep whenever I wake up in the middle of the night.

What wakes me up is the nightmares and flashbacks I have when I'm asleep from the haunting memories of my mother.

I thought about just going and sleeping with him. But I would be stupid to do that since I'm mad at him.

"Ana, don't do this to yourself." I hear Joon say. But I pretend I was asleep.

"I know you can't sleep without me come on." He says sounding like he was closer.

I hear him sigh and walk away.

I couldn't help but weep. I really hate doing him this way.

I had cried so much that I had found myself falling asleep.

I was in the middle of one of my notorious dreams when I was woken to me being in someone arms.

I felt sticky dried tears on my face.

"Shh, it's okay. I'm right here Jaji" I hear Joons honey voice say.

He must have not noticed I was now awake.

He laid me on the bed first and pulled the covers up on me and then he slides right in next to me.

He kissed both of my cheeks before laying down.

Before I knew it I was being pulled into his broad tanned chest and arms.

He had always slept shirtless.

He then started 'singing' the song he always sang just for me.

"Can you trust me~"
"Hold me tight, hug me.~"

Whenever he sang this verse I hugged him tight.

So when I did this action I could feel the dimpled smile on his face.

"I'm sorry. Please forgive me."