Chapter 21.

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Rauhan

"Rauhan" I looked up from my paper work. I smiled as I saw my little sister standing by my office door with a wide smile.

"Hira? What are you doing here?"I asked motion her to sit on chair. She come in but not alone with my two stupid friends. Now I know who call her.

"I came here to help you to get ready Mom for your marriage with Khadija." She asked after sitting down.

"You two call her?" I asked Shehroz and Shaheer and they nodded happily.

"You guys know she is married now and you can't call her here for solving my problems." I told them. They both shared a looked and glare at me.

"What if she is married? She's still our sister Rauhan" Shehroz says with a glare.

"And if you don't want our help that doesn't mean we should never try to do something. Plus we have to know what Istikhara says haven't you?" Shaheer asked confused. I nodded with a sigh.I want to know but I also know this is painful for me to listen if it say Yes then everything I planned is all vanished in few minutes and I couldn't see that.

"So what did it says?" Shehroz asked Hira. She looked at me then at them. She sighed heavily and shake her head with sad expression. I knew it. I knew it I never make her mine.

"No." Hira says with a smirked. I looked at her confused. Didn't she say No?

"What did you say?" I asked thinking I heard wrong. She smirked and rolled her eyes.

"Istikhara came in No. They tell Daniyal family what it came and they accept it. They say they don't want to do things which never accepted by Allah."

"Thank you Allah." Shaheer comment and relaxed. Hira told me things happen there. She told me what happened after I leave from there when Yasir told me about Mom behavior with Khadija. Then something happened when Khadija went back from here. She told us she was having nightmares every night. I don't know what happened in her past. Shehroz and Shaheer take Hira home while I sit here in office and go through some paper work and meetings.

In evening I get back home early. It was 5pm when I go back but usually I leave office at 7:30. I park my car outside and go in my house. I heard laughing and talking voice when I enter in living room.I saw Mom and Hira laughing at something.

"Assalam-o-Alaikum" I give my Salam and they greet me back.

"Why you came so early?"Mom asked confused. I shrugged and took my seat beside Hira.

"I want to meet her so leave early.Why you two are laughing for?" I asked as I notice pictures of her wedding on table.

"Nothing just looking her wedding photos and renewing our memories." Mom said smiling at photos. I nodded and stood up. I walk in my room, took a shower and get changed. I went downstairs and saw Dad arrived from his work. He is partner with his friend in Security Company.

"Go sit Rauhan. I am making coffee for everyone."Hira says walking past me in kitchen. I went in living room and sit next to Dad in couch. He give me a look that says he was going to talk to Mom. After Hira was done with coffee. We all sit there talking about her life with in law's.

"So... How are they all?" Dad asked sipping his hot coffee.

"They all are fine and told me to give their Salam to you all." She told us smiling.

"Walaikum Assalam. When you and Usama are going on vacations?" Mom asked her. She blushed a little before recovering herself.

"He is really busy in his work."She said with a sad smile.

"What he worked?" Dad asked confused. She hadn't told them what Usama work.

"He work in Real Estate Company with his friend Yasir and Arif. Yasir who came to Pakistan to attend our marriage but they left on our reception."

"Yeah, I remember" Dad glare at Mom who was trying to avoid his stare.

"Yasir Family is very nice. Uncle and Aunty never treat me like an outsider. They treat me like Khadija. Khadija is also a nice girl. She helps me with things when I go there first time. She told me places where I could visit. We share our things with each other. Now she is like my little sister just like Aminah. They both are best friend and now I am also best friends with them." Hira explained and smiled at end. We all looked at Mom who was in her own world. She wasn't listening anything.

"Mom." I called her but she didn't listen.

"Mom" Hira shook her. She snapped out of her thoughts and looked at us confused.

"What did you say?" She asked clearing her throats. We all looked at each other and sighed.

"Mom, please accept my decision of marrying Khadija. Please Mom for me." I begged her but she stare at me blankly before standing up and leave us there.

"Don't worry Rauhan. If she have problem with your decision then I am with you. This weekend we are going to Khadija house and ask her hand for you. Leave your Mom, she never got happy what you want."Dad says angrily and stood up and leave Hira and me alone.

"It's not what I expect." Hira said clearly not believing what just happen. It becomes normal for me. Because of me Dad and Mom were fighting a lot now. Yesterday, I heard them shouting at each other for me but they didn't know I listen them. I feel like it was my mistake that I was stubborn to get what I want. I wish everything get back to normal.

"Yeah." I finally reply and stood up. I left for gym. I text Shaheer to meet me there. He can give me advice I want. He is already engaged and more mature then Shehroz. Shehroz still behave kid sometimes. I am not insulting him or anything, it is just Shaheer give better advice them Shehroz.

"So you think this all happening because of you?" He asked running beside me on machine.

"Yes. I never saw them fighting before. This all happen because of me. If I hadn't gone to Pakistan then I never meet her and this all never happen. Tell me Shaheer how I fix all this? I am so confused and scare to see them like this."

"Rauhan, don't think it is your fault.It's just they want what is best for you but the difference is that your Dad see your happiness and your Mom also want to see you happy but your Saima Aunty put wrong things about Khadija in her mind. Try to convince your Mom she is not what she think. She is different from that."

"I am tired of convincing her Shaheer.I had no choice left only to go what Mom wants. I will get Dad to agree with Mom."

"That's not the solution Rauhan. What will happen when you go with your Mom choice? Things will get worst Rauhan.Your Dad might hate you for going with your Mom choice."

"But in end I know they get together and forget everything. If Mom choice is right then they finish their differences and live happily. I don't care about my life Shaheer. I want my family to be happy. I will adjust with whoever Mom choose for me but I couldn't see Mom and Dad breaking their relationship for me."

"Rauhan, you are only thinking about your family. Have you think what happen with Khadija when you marry someone else? If you have to go with your Mom choice then why you prayed that her marriage get cancel? Huh? Tell me?" He asked with anger in his eyes. I gulped as his eyes were burning at me. I looked away and sighed heavily.

"I don't want to live without her Shaheer but I have no choice. I don't want to be with her by going against my own Mom. You couldn't understand what I am going through so just leave it. It was my mistake to call you for advice." I said and stop running. I turnoff the machine and walk out of there. I go to my locker take out my cloths and take a long relaxing shower. I get back home and was surprised to see everything quiet. This is the sign for Mom and Dad fighting. I have to tell them. I will tell them my decision after dinner.

After an hour Hira called me for dinner.When I get down in dining room I saw everyone quietly eating dinner. Mom and Dad avoid each other. Hira keep looking at them maybe any of them say anything but they didn't.

After finishing my dinner I sit there and waited for them to finish as well. When they did I clear my throats to get their attention. They looked at me confused. Only Dad and Hira were the person here who want me to be happy but I couldn't knowing that Mom wouldn't be happy.

"I have to say something."

"What it is Rauhan?" Mom asked annoyed. Maybe thinking I talk about that topic which is somewhat right.

"Mom, I know you want to see me happy but I also want to see you happy as well. I hate when you and Dad fight because of me. You guys think I didn't know but I know. I listen them and thought that all this happen because of me."I paused at looked at Mom and Dad who were surprised.

"Mom I want to marry Khadija and spend my whole life with her but I couldn't make you unhappy to make myself happy.What I am trying to say, I will do what you say. I promise I never say anything about her again but you guys have to promise me something."

"What?" Dad asked angrily. I know I upset him but I had to. I know after few months for everything he will get back to normal and forget everything.

"That you both never fight again. Dad promise me you will be happy what I will do. Please Dad. I can't take all this anymore. I am tired of listening and begging. If Mom didn't want it then I don't asked about it again" I looked over Mom who was smiling lightly. I also forced a smile. The next words I am going to say make me sick but I have to. "I will marry Saima Aunty daughter Mom but I should tell you one thing before that I can't love her. I may pay for everything she wants but I never give her anything she deserves from her husband. I only love Khadija and always will. No one take her off from my mind. Sorry Mom." With that I stood up and walk upstairs in my room closing the door behind me before locking. I crawled toward my bed and sit there.

I closed my eyes and let a pair of tear fall from my eyes. I knew it I get weak after saying everything that I don't want to but I didn't have any other choice. I cried whole night thinking about her. I cried thinking of staying away from her. I cried of thinking her with someone else.

'I wish she get the best man in the world maybe that's not me. I hope she get everything she want from him'

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Update Again! I hope you all like it. Let me know what you think about Rauhan decision.

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-Maddy.!