“I got in!” I screamed as I saw the email sent to me about the output that I’d submitted to the COSA Office a day ago. I couldn’t react to anything else than to be happy. I can’t even believe that they’ll choose my short story to be their representing entry for the incoming Alay sa First Year!

“Good for you, we’re going to be together at Saint Xavier’s on Friday!” Karma also blushed out of joy and jumped at me right away.

We were in the hallway and other students from the Education Department were watching us, but we actually didn’t care. Nonetheless, we got in and that’s what’s more important. Karma and I just laughed about the whole thing that we slapped each other’s arms—it’s a common Filipino mannerism.

We just got dismissed from our class. I also just received the email from the COSA that my story passed the evaluation to be eligible to be an entry for the Alay sa First Year. I actually had a bad day, with long quizzes that I somehow aced, though I’m exhausted for the day. Once I received the email, it was like I was recharged to be more enthusiastic.

“Hey, what are you so happy about? Care to share?” I gasped when I heard a familiar voice. I quickly turned around looking unfazed. I trembled as I replied.

“I got in the Short Story Contest for the Alay sa First Year 2023.” I smiled at Arjim, feeling that my heart was beating wildly inside my chest. I don’t understand why I’m feeling this way, but it’s probably because of that past feeling. Even so, I like feeling this way.

“Really? Me, too! I was accepted for the Painting Competition. They’re only accepting a single painter and there’s like... ten of us from different departments, so I was so lucky enough to be picked.” He giggled. I nodded at Arjim and I sighed.

“I’ve felt what you felt, there are twenty-three people who have submitted their entries in the Short Story Contest, yet mine was the one to be picked. I was so overwhelmed, actually.” I gave Arjim a smile.

“Well, I guess we’re both lucky. Can I be with you when that day comes? I never actually tried making friends. You’re the only one I know since we’re from the same high school.” I gulped upon hearing his request, I looked at Karma and I found her look with a hint of curiosity.

“Oh, I forgot to introduce you to Karma. Arjim, this is Karmela Lim, a close friend. You could come with us, and if you want, we would like to watch you paint.” I recommended. Arjim chuckled, but he covered his mouth with the back of his hand.

“I never got the chance to introduce myself properly after what happened last time. And I also would like to thank you for defending Dace.” Karma granted a firm smile.

“It’s a pleasure knowing you, Miss Karmela—” but Karma suddenly stopped him.

“You can call me Karma, Mister...” Arjim then proceeded.

“Call me Arjim, short for Arjim Novicio.” He smiled. Even so, Karma’s reaction paves formality.

“Nice to know you, Arjim.” Karma nodded, and she smiled. She finally got the chance to introduce herself to Arjim properly.

“I should really be going now. I’ve got a train to catch. See you tomorrow, Dace, Karma.” Arjim found his way out.

“It’s okay, see you tomorrow.” I once again gave him a smile, and while giving one, he looked at me, and he nodded with great fulfillment. He then ran down the CoEd Building. But something popped out inside my mind.

“Wait, he’s from San Roque, right? The train lines don’t reach them, so why would he catch a train?” I asked randomly as I frowned.

“What was that?” I heard Karma. I shook my head and smiled.

“Oh, it’s nothing in particular.” I chuckled.

“He’s quite handsome for you, good pick.” Karma reiterated. I shivered when I heard it from her. I looked at Karma innocently, as if I did not get affected from what she said.

“What are you talking about?” I asked in a neutral tone, even though I was completely nervous inside. I saw Karma taking a deep breath as she shook her head and yawned.

“I’ve seen too many cases of love between friends, Dace. I can easily tell if someone’s in love with whom and which people are genuine.” I gulped, I asked myself how can she figure out something and suddenly blurt it out in front of people?

“I wouldn’t deny it because you’re my friend, but please don’t tell this to anyone else. I just hope that you can be trusted, Karma.” I never got to deny it because I know she’ll prove me wrong with what I say, anyway.

“Called it. Don’t worry, I’m good at keeping secrets.” She smiled and she nodded. I nodded, too, and I looked at the horizon right after, thinking of Arjim as I prepared myself to tell Karma more about him.

“I met Arjim at the start of senior high. We’ve got the same major subjects, such as Philosophy and Reading and Writing, so I often see him in class. We have such a small class that two strands can fit into a classroom. We’re one seat apart from each other, so I’m always looking at him in secret.” I smiled and I looked at Karma once again.

“I liked him a lot because of his personality, how he cares a lot about his academics, and the way he treats people—including me, there’s this demeaning aura in him. I can’t explain what it feels like. What I know is that it tickles my heart and my soul. It makes me happy.” Saying it directly to her. I now feel confident that she’d keep that for herself.

“Even so, I confessed to him, but he rejected me because... he’s already taken. I did confess, but it’s just for closure. He rejected me, anyway.” I said it in pure ease, with a hint of acceptance that our story ended there. I made it clear and simple.

“I see, so you do really like him. I can see it from how you look and respond to him. I’ve been spying on you these past weeks. I was never wrong in my doubts.” Karma giggled while I shook my head as I smiled. I giggled, too.

“I’m just wondering, how come you’re so okay with him by your side? Don’t you want to avoid him for what he’s done to you?” Karma asked me again. I just burst out laughing.

“Do you think I really had a choice about it, Karma? I don’t have a choice, since we’re classmates and the feelings are still there and...” I paused for a second, I don’t want to say it. I don't want to say what Arjim said to me that day.

“But if I did not, I would probably accept you.”

“And?” Karma asked me. I replied to her immediately with an alternative response.

“And I wanted it... too.” Out of nowhere, I heard Karma scream in joy. It echoed to the hallways of the CoEd Building but luckily, it was just the two of us there. The students from other classrooms have gone outside already.

“Oh really?! Then we should devise a plan to get you two together!” she excitedly said, making me wonder as I rolled my eyes.

“You know, you’re good at predicting, but you’re at least as good at hearing. I already told you that he was taken. How the fuck am I supposed to grab that boy? If he wasn’t taken, then rest assured, I would do everything in my power to get him by my side.” I leaned against the wall after I finished talking—I lied, Arjim wasn’t taken anymore.

The cold breeze then hit my hair as I stared into the horizon once again. The sun had already come down, and the sky was turning orange. The calm and cold breeze was blowing right across the hallways and the corridors. Seeing it makes it clear that I should be going home already.

“I should get going, too. I also have a train to catch. See you tomorrow, Karma.” I paid her goodbye, she just nodded and smiled, and then she waved her hand.

“Yeah, see you tomorrow.” She uttered, I made my way out as she finished uttering her sentence.

I immediately went to the train station to make my way home to my dorm. Thinking about what I’ve said to Karma earlier makes a doubt out of me. Arjim is now single because he recently broke up with Jenelle—well, that’s all I know, because that’s what he said to me. I’m still in doubt that I shouldn’t go overboard with Arjim.

Should I accept Arjim into my life again and forget about what happened in Senior High? Well, I guess I should but something’s triggering me from letting go of all those memories.

Too many questions were still left unanswered, and I don’t want to be with Arjim yet because he recently broke up with his girlfriend. Jenelle would think that she got replaced for someone like me who doesn’t even see her looks and charm.

When I reached the station where the dorm that I’m staying in was located, I walked to my room and took a shower before resting my body on my bed for another tiring day—still wondering where to start from all the feelings that I keep concealing inside me.

I looked at the white ceiling of my room, I yawned as I close my eyes. I set off all the shit and shenanigans that’s going on my life lately and so, I slept peacefully, not minding anything else but rest, thinking tomorrow would be another day to catch up with anything I wanted to do.

***

I’ve been in the library for an hour, reading modern literature that tackles several issues to get some ideas for the work I’ll write during the Short Story Writing Competition of Alay sa First Year 2023.

I’m currently reading “Smaller and Smaller Circles” by Felisa Batacan, a book about two Jesuit priests who would solve a series of killings involving a serial killer killing little boys in the slums of Manila.

I also got two books with me. One is a romance story titled, “Aristotle and Dante: Discovered the Secrets of the Universe” by Benjamin Alire Sáenz, and a novel about philosophy by Joshtein Gaarder titled, “Sophie’s World”—I have a copy of these books back at my dorm and I already read them, but I’ll re-read them to notice the autor’s style of writing. I’ve got to read some passages from those books that I picked the week before the competition to get some ideas.

“Hey, what are you reading?” I fluttered when I heard Arjim’s voice from my back. My eyes widened when I saw his hand traveling in front of me to get a glance at the book I was reading.

His head touched my shoulders as he glanced at the book. I kept a stoic position until he was done checking out the books that I read. He then sat on a chair beside me. I just noticed that he’s got a small canvas and watercolor.

“Nice books, I knew that you liked those types of romance like Aristotle and Dante, but didn’t know you’re also into mystery and philosophical fantasy.” Arjim smirked as he positioned his canvas on a table painting stand.

“Well, I’m just reading these to get some ideas for the Short Story Writing Competition next week.” I answered.

“Are those even allowed in here? Water and drinks, even food are strictly prohibited inside the library because they could damage the books inside.” I then asked him.

“I got permission from the librarian. I don’t have any place to go. The library is the only option I’ve got. I promised that I would cause no damage and I would pay the consequences if I did so.” Arjim smiled at me and he giggled.

“You’re using watercolor?” I asked again.

“I paint best this way, and watercolor is allowed in the competition, so I think it would save me some money if I competed to paint in watercolor.” Arjim answered once again, he began sketching something into the canvas.

“We don’t have classes in the afternoon except for Prof-Ed, right?” I heard him ask.

“Which one?” I asked.

“The Child and Adolescent Development,” he replied. I just nodded.

“We do, it’s at four o’clock.” I simply told him while reading the book I got in my hand.

“Well, let’s do what we have to do. I’ll read, you’ll paint. Just... don’t splat water on the books that I borrowed, I will pay the fine when you do.” I smirked.

“Yeah, yeah, why do they even have a copy of these novels for the literature section? Isn’t it too casual to put these books beside ones that are more academic?” Arjim asked me once more.

“I don’t know, I just fetched these books from the shelves and came here to sit and read.” I giggled, and I sighed. I looked at Arjim with a smile and I casually talked to get the conversation going.

“Isn’t it too hard to paint on canvas with watercolor? It could be tattered, or the blending wouldn’t be that nice?” I asked him. He just laughed, and he looked at me with teasing eyes. He smirked, and he suddenly brought his face closer to mine.

My eyes widened when I found myself in a hot seat situation. I couldn’t move or even flinch a finger. I gasped as I let out my breath. I felt like I was blushing on the outside because of how hot my face was feeling right now.

“Do you think that I can’t paint best on canvas using watercolor?” he asked. I stood quiet as our eyes met, striking me with a sensual massage from my flesh to my bones.

“A-Arjim, y-you’re too... close.” I uttered almost unequally in persuasion to keep my eyes away from his glance.

“Am I?” he smirked.

“Dace, I’ll show what I’m capable of.” My eyes widened, I closed them after I’ve felt my heart racing, waiting for the next thing to happen, but it took seconds before I could get what he meant.

I opened my eyes and I found him painting on his canvas. I was shocked to think that he was going to... kiss me. What the fuck is wrong with me? Why am I thinking about it? Why am I expecting it from him?!

“Hey, are you okay?” Arjim asked me, my attention was drawn to him. I made a fake smile.

“Yes, I am.” I muttered.

“Were you expecting something else from that? I just meant to show what I can do with my painting.” Arjim smirked, playfully teasing me with his words.

“What? No, I don’t!” I made it clear to him that I didn’t intend to engage on the matter. I drew my face away from him and I buried myself in the book that I’m currently reading.

“Don’t you fucking disturb me!” I instilled, making him laugh. From my peripheral vision, I noticed him giggling as he continued painting.

“Be my guess,” he said.

Hours later and we’re done with what we wanted to do. Arjim showed me his painting of two people embracing each other. It was as beautiful as an acrylic or an oil painting I’ve seen so far. He truly does have the ability to make a simple watercolor painting stand out.

“Is it beautiful?” Arjim asked. I nodded and smiled after seeing the painting.

“Yeah, it’s the most beautiful painting I’ve seen so far. The color combinations of blue and orange really emphasized it.” I complimented the painting.

“I’m flattered, thanks for your compliment.” He smiled, he stood up from his chair and looked at his watch.

“It’s almost four o’clock, let’s get back to class. We might run late for Prof-Ed.” Arjim insisted. I nodded and I took my books with me. I borrowed it with my library card.

With these things happening, I’m totally ready for Alay sa First Year!