We'd made it back to Mustang's office in silence. I guessed he wasn't ready to speak till he was surrounded by four walls. And I didn't want to strike up the question immediately.

He said we would talk, I'm sure he meant he was going to do all the explaining. I sat before his desk, my foot tapping relentlessly against the wooden floor. I couldn't seem to control the anxiety coursing through my veins.

Mustang finally took a seat and he releases a soft sigh. He seemed troubled, more than I realized.

"Do you want the short version or the long version?" He finally asks, his voice surprising me slightly. Though I didn't hesitate on my answer. It was obvious what I wanted.

"The long version." I reply. "I want to know how you know my mother and how you know me. How close were you with my mother?"

"So demanding," Mustang muses. "Just like your mom. But don't worry I'm going to explain everything."

I lean back against the chair with crossed arms. I gesture a hand for him to continue. It only made him smirk while shaking his head. He leans forward as he clasps his hands atop the desk.

"It was a few months before the Eastern Rebellion when I joined the military as a State Alchemist." He begins. "I was youngest to join before your friend Edward Elric became a State Alchemist. And I was quite the arrogant prick back then."

I wanted to scoff against his claims, I may not know this man for long, but I knew he wasn't anything far from arrogant.

"Judging by your face you think I'm lying." Mustang abruptly hums. My shoulder straightens and heat rushes to my features.

Was I making it obvious? Did I really grimace at his words? I open my mouth, but he only dismisses me like he knew what I was going to say.

"Oh, I was worse back then—believe me. Your mother was the one who put me in my place."

"Really? How?" A surge of abrupt curiosity took hold as I could feel myself leaning closer towards the desk. My eyes were filled with interest and that only made Mustang more pleased.

"I was in East City for a certain mission a while back and Lucinda was one of the State Alchemists that occupied the sector. Anyway, I flaunted to anyone who would listen that everyone's skill was inferior to mine." Mustang shifts in his seat, a warm smile spreading across his face. I pondered over the action for a moment. "When I learned of Lucinda's technique I wanted to show everyone I was better than her despite our similar style. She hated me, of course, told me to act my age and stop getting in her way. I didn't listen and challenged her to a simple duel."

I shake my head, such a story never reached my ears when my mother was alive. I found it all intriguing though. My mother who placed a tough, reliable facade had fallen prey to Mustang's games.

"Well?" I ask impatiently. "Did she win?"

Mustang releases a throaty chuckle, "Long story short, yes. She won and not by a long shot either. The match was over before I knew it. With one snap of her fingers she'd ripped the very cloth of my gloves. There wasn't even a scratch on me."

My mother was able to do that? She controlled her lightning alchemy in a way it wouldn't effect her target? Let alone, targeting something without injuring an individual?

I don't remember reading any thing like that in her research. It only said how she created this new technique and how to wield it. The fact she was able to cut his glove and not even inflicting a scratch or a small burn was astonishing.

I could even tell the fact still surprised Mustang. There was a gleam in his eyes as he remembered the ordeal. Somehow that eased the pain of my heart and even brought a small smile to my lips.

"Your mother became a friend of a mine short after and even my mentor. She helped me sharpen my skills as a solider and as a alchemist. Told me how to aim with precise and control the intensity of my flames despite our different alchemic usage."

I still couldn't believe how Mustang spoke of my mother. His tone was filled with so admiration and respect. My mother must've made a huge impact on him.

"If you two were so close how come I never heard of you?" I asked with a raised brow. "My mother and I were also close, she was everything to me. So how come this is the first time I've heard about your relationship?"

Mustang shrugs with a small huff. He takes a stand and faces the window behind him. "That I don't have an answer to," he replies. "Though, I was aware about the child she had. She told me everything about you. Told me how lovely you were and how you were the pride and joy in her life. She said you were everything she wasn't and that made her love you more than ever. Heh, in a way she was a lot like Hughes when it came to children."

I wasn't sure who this Hughes was, but he also talked about him with such respect. His words stunned me, I forgot the will to speak. I was constantly told as a child how much my mother loved me.

I was showered with love and affection, the opposite as to what my father put me through. Simply hearing how highly she talked of me, well——that made both breathing and talking difficult. I tried to recollect myself, gather myself up again to put up that tough front, but it was difficult now.

I cleared my throat and blinked countlessly. Tears were threatening to fall but I forbade them to. I needed to ask a question—one I've been dying to hear the answer to.

"Colonel, you've mentioned the Eastern Rebellion. Did you—"

"Fight alongside Lucinda?" He finishes for me. "Yes and no. We were both pulled into the war at the same time, but were sent off in different squadrons."

A soft, 'oh' escapes me. I wasn't sure what to say now. If he wasn't around when my mother died then there was no point on asking. I wasn't going to prod when this subject could be uncomfortable to him.

The office was silent for a moment. None of us dared to say a word. Mustang kept his focus on the window while I held my gaze on his back.

"Well, that's the end of that story." Mustang suddenly sighs. He whirls around, his onyx eyes suddenly brimming with curiosity. "Your turn."

"My turn?" I repeat with a look. "For what?"

"Why are you traveling with the Elrics? You interested in helping them get their bodies back?"

My initial reaction was to say yes, but that simple word never made it passed my lips. The couple of times I've tried I couldn't say it, and I wasn't sure why.

"If that were true shouldn't I be with them and help with going over some research?"

The question blurted out of me before I could ponder over it. I curse in my head when Mustang doesn't respond immediately. I could feel his gaze set upon me, I didn't have the courage to look straight at him.

"Technically, yes." He replies after a moment. I cringe at his answer. Truly, I was a terrible friend. "But I do believe there are many other ways to help them than doing the obvious."

I raise a brow, confusion kindled inside me. I look at the Colonel to see his onyx eyes still on me, but were contemplative than before. "What do you mean?" I ask.

"I mean, there's many ways to be of help to someone, Y/n." He replies. "You have to figure it out yourself though. It can be dealing with the obvious like helping the Elrics skim through books all day. Or comforting them in a time of need. Or even pledging your loyalty to someone and promising to walk through hell with them if needed to be."

A soft smile taints his lips. That last sentence brought some sort of gentleness in his eyes though I wasn't sure why.

Had someone pledged their undying loyalty to him? Or was he the one following someone through and thin?

He shakes his head abruptly as if ridding himself of some sort of forbidden thought in his mind. Sucking in a breath he levels his gaze back on me.

"All I'm saying is you can help them in your own way. You just need to figure it out what it is." His words rang with wiseness and good judgment. For a man who seemed like an arrogant prick he did have a way with words.

Though I wasn't sure what or how I could help the brothers with. What could be my own way? As much as I've tried to think I couldn't come up with a single solution.

And it couldn't be done comfortably when I could feel Mustang assessing me carefully. Swallowing thickly I give him a small shrug.

"Do I have to come up with this now?" I ask. The corners of his lips quirk up as he gives a low chuckle.

"Of course not. It's just something for you to think about." I nod silently, it really was a lot to take in. "In the meantime, shall I take you back to Tucker's home? Or would you like to learn the things your mother taught me?"

I was taken aback. He would teach me what my mother taught him? I may not be a fan of alchemy but when it came to my mother's research—it became a different story.

And I could no longer deny the intrigued pull I felt when Mustang offered me such a thing. Unknowingly I leaned forward. "Would you really teach me?"

Mustang's eyes gleamed in devilish delight. His smirk spreading wider now. "If that's what you wish."

Deep down, it truly was. He spoke of things my mother didn't write in her notes, but on the other hand Ed and Al were still researching on ways to get their bodies back. I knew it was wise if I went back to them and helped.

Though what good would I be if I fell sleep with a book on my lap? I chew my inner cheek, "I don't want to upset Ed and Al."

I knew it sounded childish but it was true. And I thought Mustang would've snickered at my comment. He didn't though. Only, he'd snapped his fingers with an aha moment written on his face.

"I've got an idea."

\/\/\/\/\/\/

The idea was either spot on or utterly ridiculous. I was to train in the morning with Mustang and finish the day by going to Tucker's house and help out the Elrics. I made no statement of my recent activities of these past few days nor did any of them question me.

All they thought was I chose sleep than waking up early to go to some library. And surprisingly it worked, though Mustang still inquired why I wouldn't tell them. And in all honesty, I wasn't sure how.

With my sickness taken into great consideration by Ed I was sure he would flip out and yell at the Colonel. Though coughing up blood didn't occur—yet. At least, not in front of Mustang or the brothers.

I made sure to double my medication during this week. As of now, I was with the Elrics whom decided to take an odd break considering how they were only here for two hours.

I was relieved, however, I couldn't stand to see another page full of equations and words. It was the fact that I was being dragged outside against my will that bothered me.

"Ah, Ed I don't need to go outside!" I whine while wincing at my aching joints.

"Don't be silly!" He exclaims with a grin while holding my hand firmly. "Everyone's going out."

"Doesn't mean I have to."

Still, once Ed had bursted through the front door, bright sunlight attacked my eyes. I shut them instantly, despising the burning sensation radiating over my eyelids. The sound of giggling and playful greeted my ears. Opening an eye I notice to my left Al was playing with the little girl.

Her name was Nina if I remembered correctly. She slid down his back as if it were a slide. Her dog, Alexander, barked while leaping around them.

"I don't understand," I mumble before looking at Ed. He stares at the three with a grin plastered over his features. "You want me to watch them play?"

Ed chuckles, shaking his head as I said something ridiculous. Hand still intertwined with mine he gives a small squeeze.

"You're slow sometimes," he sighs. Heat rises to my cheeks and I abruptly look away. I wasn't sure if I was okay with the way he said that. It was too—warm.

"Am not." I mutter with a pout.

Ed scoffs, "Sure. But seriously you don't get it?"

I push out a cheek. Now I wasn't that stupid. "I'm not gonna play if that's what you're getting at." I reply.

"Aw, why not?" He whines.

I felt a sharp tug on my arm and feel myself stumble like an idiot. I was pulled towards Ed till my chest was inches from his. I was forced to meet his golden gaze and instantly wished I hadn't.

They bores into mine like he could see my very soul. I could smell fresh sage and woody aroma from him. My heart lurched into my throat. What's with him?

"Nina's been asking for you." He says in a low tone. For a moment I forgot how to speak. It took a moment for me gather my thoughts.

"Sh—she has?"

He nods with a small smile. "I think you should play with her. There's nothing wrong with the idea."

"I never said there was."

"Then why don't you want to?"

I was taken aback by the question. It was something I didn't want to answer, and one thing that made me feel exhausted simply just thinking about it. I didn't want to do anything fun simple because the idea is tiring.

Everything was tiring and pretending to have fun sounded exhausting. I wasn't about to lie to a little girl and do something I wasn't interested in. But I wasn't going to tell Ed that.

These were the things I would take to my grave before he'd found out. With my free hand I gently push him away.

"You're too close," I murmur awkwardly. Realizing he still held my hand and how close he truly was, he quickly lets me go with a panicked expression.

"Ah, my bad!" He stammers with an awkward smile. A small tint of red coats his cheeks. "Didn't mean to do that. . ." The rest of his sentence trailed off as he begun to rub the back of his head.

I nod nervously, avoiding his gaze. I hated how my heart banged against my chest, could he hear it too? I bite my inner cheek with sweat gleaming my temples.

"W-well!" I breathe while clapping my hands. "I think I'll go sit under that tree. . ."

"Y-yeah! And I'll just—uhh—play with Alexander!" Ed adds with a nod. For a moment we shared an awkward stare. One that made my cheeks rosier and my stomach clench.

Ed's eyes widen with his ears turning redder each second. The tension slowly builds to the point I couldn't handle the mere feeling of my stomach twisting. We both turned away and I hurry towards a nearby tree.

Slumping to the ground, I let out a sigh. My breathing was coming uneven, it was like I ran a mile. I attempted to take in a deep breath but that only made my chest tighten.

I didn't want to think about that moment, especially the feeling. Feeling Ed's breath hitting against my face, the way his voice was softer than velvet—I scrunch my eyes shut. I refuse to relive it.

I won't allow myself to be portrayed as some lovestruck idiot. Besides it didn't mean anything, not one bit. Even if made my heart pound relentlessly against my chest or if mushed all my thoughts together—it was nothing.

And I was sure Ed didn't care—like I was supposed to do. After all, seeing him chase both Alexander and Nina I saw no trace of that flustered expression on his features. Somehow that released some of the tension from my body.

If he didn't think much of it why should I?

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Get ready for the next couple of chapters!

Hopefully I'll publish them soon:)

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