Last week that night gave me the jitterbug. Eating with Taehyung was so... fun. It felt as if it as just the two of us, even if it meant I was living in one world while he lived in another. It wasn't as awkward as I thought it was, and it didn't even take five minutes before we were totally fluent with each other. It was so cute how Taehyung was having so much fun and talking about his interests; touchingly enough, some of them were my own interests.

Needless to say, it was a very nice chat.

And I just couldn't sleep that night. My belly was fluttering with butterflies, thinking about the way that we had connected so well. It made me fall even more hopelessly in love... I never knew I could become so whipped over another boy like this. I started thinking about how this all happened.

It all started with a backpack swing to the head...

But was it a good thing?

I wasn't sure. I wanted it to be a good thing. I truly did. But I knew that Taehyung wasn't gay. That girl he liked was more than proof of it. So... Once again, I really need to ask myself.

Was me getting closer to Taehyung a good thing at all?

"Heyo Hoseok~" I blink myself out of my thoughts at the voice of Taehyung. He waved to me, waiting for me to come over to him in the lockers. I immediately grabbed my lunch and followed him until we were inches apart. "Hoseok look," He quickly glanced into his locker and gulped.

"What?"

Taehyung nipped his fingers nervously as he bounced on his feet. "L-Look..."

I, momentarily confused, furrow my brows and lean in so I could take a better look as well. My jaw tensed straight away, and I start feeling a fury grow deep inside of me. However despite this, I calmly grab the piece of paper and take a closer look at it. There, in pretty writing...

I really like you... Let's talk in the shcool yard at lunch!

"W-Who do you think this is?! No one ever liked me...!" Taehyung whispered to me in an excited tone. I was too busy trying not to shred the paper in my hand right now... Oh my God. It was clear as day that this was a girl's handwriting. It was so unfair... 

Taehyung gripped onto my arm - the excitement and happiness clear on his face. I snap out of my sense of strange jealousy and force a smile on my face. "Do you bet it was that girl who bumped into us a week ago?"

Taehyung's eyes lit up and his face flustered. I remembered all the times that they had suddenly unexpectedly started running into each other the more the week passed. I, obviously, faked being happy. I was really disappointed and jealous, even though Taehyung wasn't mine. I just felt so left out and hurt when he would get so giddy over her.

"Y-You think?" Tae turned his head around, looking up and down the hall to see if she was possibly around. I frowned mentally, yet I kept the smile and even laughed.

"You're acting pretty cute, you know."

"Shh! I can't act cute in front of a girl! What am I supposed to do if I look cute? I want to look manly in front of her."

That wasn't possible in my head. He was already too cute to be manly. "I could always help."

Taehyung's eyes widened and a blushing smile came to his face. "R-Really?!" With a light chuckle, he quickly replied, "Thank you Hobi~!"

Hobi? He hasn't called me that before... But I liked it. "Yeah, no problem! Now let's go check out the yard."

I was nervous, but only because I was scared that they would really be together. I couldn't say anything though. We all knew why. And so with a sigh, we grabbed our lunches and walked outside. That was when we noticed right away a girl who seemed to be standing out from the rest of the girls, looking like she was expecting someone.

Taehyung gripped onto my arm anxiously, hiding his face behind my body a little; I couldn't help but coo at the sight. "Tae, why are you so nervous?"

"I-I dunno... M-Maybe I shouldn't do this."

Naturally, I turned around to face him. He had his head lowered and he fiddled with his hands, which made me really want to hold them and rub them and tell him it was okay. "We don't have to do this, Tae. No one's forcing you."

Taehyung looked like he was having a battle in his head. I didn't understand what the big deal was... But then again, I was a coward and I never faced my problems head on. I'm hiding perfectly the fact I love this boy, not even he knew that I liked him.

"O-Okay, I think I can do this..." Taehyung inhaled and pushed his brows together, attempting to look what I assumed to be a little more 'manly'. But as soon as he made eye contact with me, it all faltered. "Y-You'll still be here when I come back, right?" 

"Of course I will. Don't worry about it, I'm your slave, remember?" I grinned to attempt to unnerve the boy, which made him get a little frustrated in an amused way. I think I succeeded, because he nodded his head and I nodded back. Taehyung soon walked by me and talked to the girl.

-  -  -  -

It went well for the boy. I congratulated him. He had gotten himself a new girlfriend that he was happy about. That night when I drove him home, I was extremely depressed and mixed with other emotions I couldn't exactly distinguish. Taehyung was giggling excitedly in my car, sometimes telling me about what he'd do to make her feel special and happy.

He didn't know I was dying inside the more he was telling me this stuff.

But he shouldn't know, because I wasn't worth it.

It was finally time to let Taehyung get out of the car. I, as usuall, waved him goodbye with a smile and yelled my farewell to make him laugh. It felt so good to see him laugh because of me, yet it was just momentarily.

I lost my smile right as Taehyung wasn't in sight. I stared at my lap, feeling my chest sting almost unbearably as I didn't know how to feel anymore. The man I love was slowly... Drifting away from me. And I couldn't do anything about it. Even if I did confess, he wouldn't care. He had a girlfriend now.

As I drove away, I slowly thought about ways to try to tell Taehyung how I feel. It would never happen, though. 

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how do you feel about this fanfic

how do you feel hoseok feels

do you think that hoseok will ever confess? 

please, tell me your thoughts!