CH 2: Please, Kick Him

The first few ice creams went down easily but after the third one or so, you started to feel like shit. To put it in simpler terms, you lost. Horribly. You seemed to have forgotten in the heat of the moment that you're lactose intolerant, which for you is quite a shame; as you'd now be spending a week at the Matsuno homestead doing just about anything Osomatsu told you to. As if that wasn't bad enough, you'd also probably be wearing a maids uniform.

"Woohoo~! I beat youuuu!" Osomatsu cheered happily after finishing his last ice cream, you were laying on the floor curled up with a very unpleasant stomach ache, your only retort to shakily raise up a hand and flip him off. "Awww someone's salty cause she loooost!" He says tauntingly.

"Eh, fuck you." You manage to turn over, laying on your side, and just lay there scowling at Osomatsu's stupid smirking face.

You hear the door to the house open just as Osomatsu proclaims, "Alright, now we just have to get you a maid uniform~"

You then hear a startled Choromatsu shout from the other room, "J-JUST BECAUSE OUR PARENTS ARE OUT DOES NOT GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO DO SUCH LEWD THINGS!" He barges into the room blushing at the thought of God knows what, and sees you lying on the floor, clutching your stomach, and Osomatsu leaning over you with a predatory grin. He steps over you, quickly pinning Osomatsu, who is too busy laughing his ass off to stop Choromatsu. "(Your name)! Get out while I have him pinned!"

"Choromatsu, what are you doing?" You roll over to look at the unfolding scene, quizzically raising an eyebrow. Choromatsu is still managing to hold Osomatsu down, although it looks difficult; as Osomatsu is now flailing with laughter at Choromatsu's desperate attempt to save who he apparently thought of as "his girl".

He manages to stammer back, "I-I thought Osomatsu was doing something pervy to you!"

You stare blankly at Choromatsu and shake your head, no, "He was just being an ass, but thanks I guess?" You pause, remembering just how much of an ass Osomatsu was being, "Of course it wouldn't hurt my feelings if you kicked him a couple times."

Choromatsu nervously laughs and slowly gets off of Osomatsu, letting him back up. "S-so uh, what did I hear about a...maids costume?" He blushes slightly and averts his gaze. Osomatsu, slightly short of breath from his uproarious laughter, staggers to his feet and puts a hand on the wall to support himself.

"Oh, yeah, that...Well I lost a bet with Osomatsu and now I have to be his maid for a week." You explain, plain and simple.

Choromatsu looks at his brother enviously and gives you a sympathetic smile "Ah, well, I'm sorry about that." He continues, raising an eyebrow curiously, "What were you doing on the ground by the way?"

Just as you were about to shed some light on the matter, as Choromatsu had so nicely asked, an annoying asshole decided he'd be so kind as to answer the question for you!

"We had a bet to see who could eat their ice cream the fastest. Mrs.Pansy over here forgot she was lactose intolerant and got a belly ache!" Osomatsu smirks, pointing at you. You stand up and walk over to Osomatsu, putting a hand on his shoulder and smiling darkly.

"Hey! Remember the time that bee landed on you, and you gave the shrillest, most high pitched scream? Cause' I do. Mr.Pansy." You smirk back at him, hopefully knocking his ego down a notch.

"Aww does that mean we're married~?" He teases, softly grabbing your hand off his shoulder and holding it in his, gently caressing it. You blush hard and freeze, trying to think of an appropriate response. You decide your reactions could either be to laugh this off, to flirt back, or to cuss at him.

Luckily you didn't have to pick a way to react to Osomatsu's assholery, as Karamatsu decided to dramatically burst into the room striking one of his usual ridiculous poses. This one happened to include him running over to you while taking off his sunglasses, getting down on one knee, and grabbing your other hand, while looking at you the whole time.

"But (Your name)! My Karamatsu girl! How could this be?! Do you have feelings for another man?!" Karamatsu exclaims, looking at Osomatsu and tightening his grip on your hand. He shifts his gaze back to you and continues his dramatic speech, "I will win you back (Your name)! I will try all night and day, even if it takes me one hundred years, nay, eternity!" He clenches his other hand into a fist and looks off into the distance.

This camera worthy moment was in the process of being captured by none other than the ever vigilant Todomatsu, who entered the room shortly after Karamatsu.

"Ah are you three really in a love triangle?" Todomatsu smiles cutely and snaps away using his phone camera, "You could do WAY better than them (Your name)!" Todomatsu says as he winks at you.

Osomatsu frowns at him and narrows his eyes, "What's that supposed to mean? Hmm?". Karamatsu on the other hand, put his sunglasses back on, and made the typical 'cool guy' tch sound.

"Oh, nothing." Todomatsu smirks evilly at his two oldest brothers, "It's just, everyone knows I'M the cutest! So you two don't really stand a chance~".

As the three brothers started quarreling, Choromatsu just watching all of this unfold, Ichimatsu quietly slipped into the room and sat down at the small coffee table. You manage to slip away from the three, and sit down next to Ichimatsu, who greets you with a small nod.

"...What are they all worked up about?" Ichimatsu deadpans, pointing in the general direction of the noise.

You shrug, unsure of how to answer since everything escalated so quickly, "To be honest," you pause looking Ichimatsu in the eyes "I have no idea what's happening".

He lets out a small chortle, "Things can get pretty hectic. I don't blame you." He cracks a small smile and pulls up his surgical mask, a light tinge of pink forming on his cheeks; or so you think. You glance back over at the epicenter of the chaos, just making sure things haven't gotten too violent.

"Totty, can't you see you're driving (Your name) away from my loving embrace?! She left as soon as you came over here." Karamatsu complained to Todomatsu, who happened to be too busy bickering with Osomatsu to hear him. You can't help but feel a twinge of pity in your heart for Karamatsu.

In the midst of trying to hear fragments of the argument, you hear the door slam open, and a very enthusiastic shout from none other than Jyushimatsu, "I'M HOME!", followed by his usual 'Muscle muscle! Hustle hustle!' as he joined the fray in his baseball uniform. He looks around and notices you, he waves happily and grins. "Ah! (Your Name)'s here! (Your Name)'s here!" He happily jumps up and down for a moment before quickly running over and sitting down next to you.

You smile at him; he could be pretty adorable sometimes, especially when he was happy to see you! "Good to see you Jyushimatsu!" you giggle and pat him on the back, making him blush happily and squirm about like he so often does.

"How are you-" Jyushimatsu gets cut off by Todomatsu shouting in response to Osomatsu.

"M-MAID FOR A WEEK? NO WAY SHE'D DO THAT FOR YOU." Todomatsu quickly turned around, facing you. "I-is that true? You're Osomatsu's maid for a week?" Todomatsu frantically asked you, Osomatsu smirking silently, with his arms crossed, behind Todomatsu. The whole room was finally quiet, everyone's eyes on you, waiting for your response. You could almost cut the (sexual?)tension with a knife.

After another few moments of silence, you manage to nervously stammer, "Well, uh, I lost a bet...So yeah I have to be his maid for a week." You look at the floor and absentmindedly scratch your neck, embarrassment radiating off of you.

The next one to break the silence of the room was Choromatsu, more specifically him saying, "Jyushimatsu! Octopus hold!" and pointing at Osomatsu, his playful smirk rapidly changing to a panicked expression. Jyushimatsu quickly complies and perfectly pins Osomatsu in the Octopus hold, practically leaving him at the mercy of Choromatsu.

"What the hell, Choromatsu?!" Osomatsu hisses in pain, demanding an explanation of why he deserves to be pinned for a second time today.

Choromatsu responds "W-well, it isn't really fair that (Your Name) is your maid..." Choromatsu pauses and you perk up, happy that you might be getting out of your penalty. "W-we should each get a day to have (Your Name) a-as our maid." He gulps nervously.

"No way! I won fair and square!" Osomatsu retorts, refusing to break, and struggles against Jyushimatsu.

Choromatsu sighs and continues, "I didn't want to have to do this...But, we'll show her your 'stash' if you don't agree." The other brothers give him a thumbs up at his resourceful use of blackmailing Osomatsu.

Osomatsu's eyes widen in fear, as he shakes his head, no, "Y-you wouldn't do that!" He pleads Choromatsu, who remains stiff with his blackmailing threat. "Fine...I'll share." He eventually gives in, earning a chorus of woo-hoos and the like from the rest of the brothers, making him hang his head in a distraught manner. Jyushimatsu releases him, letting Osomatsu fall to the ground, standing there happily grinning.

Choromatsu offers Osomatsu a hand up, "W-we can go oldest to youngest, starting tomorrow. So you can have her as your maid first, Osomatsu." he reasons, helping Osomatsu up off the ground.

"Ah alright, sounds fine" Osomatsu stretches his now sore muscles "Wait, what about the extra day? There's six of us, and seven days in a week."

Choromatsu turns around and looks at you, as you're flushing with the embarrassment of having to be a maid to six different men, "Oh, perhaps...she could choose for her last day." he offers thoughtfully, you nod in agreement. You figure you could at least pick the brother you most enjoyed spending time with, which doesn't seem too bad.

"Alright everyone! Let's help (Your Name) pick out her maid uniform!" Osomatsu, back to his happy self, grabs your hand and leads you out of the house with the rest of the brothers trailing eagerly behind.

You start work first thing in the morning. Good luck (Your Name).