LORELEI

THIS CASE took a sudden twist. All along, we thought that the Roel poser was among the three male suspects. It had never occurred to us until the moment of truth that the girlfriend herself could be pretending to be him. Surprise! The victim of what we assumed to be a con and the perpetrator were the same person.

"So what are we going to do with that phone?" I asked. The four of us convened again in the clubroom the next day. Nasa mesa ang isang phone na may itim na case. May mga gasgas ang tempered glass nito.

Yesterday, Jamie and I pretended to have retrieved all the stolen phones except for one—Roel's, or Megan's, we later found out—and returned them to their respective owners. Megan seemed so distressed that her treasured gadget was missing. Pinakiusapan niya pa kami na samahan siya sa lugar kung saan namin nabawi ang phones. Baka doon daw nahulog ang kanya. Seeing her desperation to find it, our conclusion must be spot on.

In a way, I understood why Megan started using her late boyfriend's phone. She even logged in her social media accounts there. That phone was a repository of Roel's memories. Nandoon ang unposted and unsent selfies niya. Nandoon ang wacky videos niya. Nandoon din ang notes kung saan naka-draft ang thoughts niya. She wanted a part of him to remain with her. Kaya niya siguro naisipang kunin at gamitin ang device na 'yon.

Now, the phone was in our possession. Whether to return it to Megan or do something else with it, that was entirely up to us. At 'yon ang kailangan naming pagdesisyonan ngayon.

"Maybe we can hide it muna hanggang sa maging okay na siya?" suhestiyon ni Jamie habang ipinapaikot-ikot ang naka-braid niyang buhok. "I don't know kung paano niya na-manage na magpanggap na hindi siya ang nagse-send ng message sa sarili niya. Pero nagiging addiction na niya 'to. Ginagamit niya 'tong pag-cope sa pagkawala ng boyfriend niya. Kaso—sorry for the term—niloloko lang niya ang sarili niya. Kailangan na nating putulin habang maaga pa."

"By not returning this phone to her, we will be putting an end to her addiction, huh?" Alistair caressed his chin as he looked down. "That seems to make some sense. Pero nakita naman natin ang reaksyon niya kahapon, 'di ba? She was so stressed out by the fact that her phone got lost. It might worsen her situation kung hindi niya makukuha ang hinahanap niya."

"May punto ka." Napatango si Jamie, sandaling tumahimik, bago muling nagsalita. "What if ibalik natin ang phone na 'to sa kanya, pero tatanggalan natin siya ng access sa account ni Roel? That way, hindi na siya makapagpapanggap bilang boyfriend niya at titigil na ang messages! She can then start to move on!"

That was more acceptable than her first suggestion. Kung mahihinto na ang messages mula kay Roel, unti-unting mapagtatanto ni Megan na talagang wala na ang kanyang boyfriend. It was going to be painful—it was meant to be painful—but it would be the best for her.

"Kilalang-kilala niya si Roel kaya kuhang-kuha niya kung paano 'to mag-compose ng message. Kaya pala wala tayong mahanap na concrete discrepancy sa conversations nila!" dagdag niya bago iginala ang tingin. "So who's in favor of my brilliant suggestion?"

"I'm not."

The three of us turned in Loki's direction. He swivelled his chair away from us and looked out the window. There was nothing to gaze on except the slow-moving clouds and the cerulean skies. I expected him to be the first to throw his support for that move. This was indeed strange.

"What do you mean, Loki?" Jamie asked. Her forehead creased. "Pangit ba ang suggestion ko?"

He swivelled back to us. "Someone told me that every person has a different way of coping with grief." He gave me a side-eyed glance. "If this is Megumi's way of coping, should we take that away from her? If so, who are we to do it? She's not harming anyone, is she? If the poser was one of the three guys, then I would automatically agree with your proposal. But it isn't the case."

I was not the only one whose eyes blinked repeatedly. His statement came as a shock to everyone in the room. This was highly unusual for somelike like him. Yesterday, he recommended an extreme way to force the truth out of the suspects. Now, he was telling us to "let her be."

"Loki, ikaw ba talaga 'yan?" pakurap-kurap na tanong ni Jamie. Idinampi pa niya ang likod ng kamay sa noo nito. "May sakit ka ba? Nakakain ka ba ng breakfast? Lagi kasing pareho ang vote natin kaya I find it weird na you're against my idea."

"Not this time," he replied, slapping her hand away. "I may not fully understand why people do dumb things, particularly in matters related to romantic feelings. But I do know a teensy bit about loss."

"I get what you're saying," Alistair said with a nod. "Before we found out the truth yesterday, we had a different understanding of this case. The revelation changed everything. By what right do we have to deprive her of what she's enjoying?"

"Pero kung hahayaan natin siyang i-feed ang delusions niya, siya rin ang masasaktan sa bandang huli! We have the power to cut it short and save her from an unhealthy habit."

"That should be up to her, not us," Loki insisted. "Besides, we've already fulfilled the client's request. There's nothing else to be done."

Both sides got some good points. Our main objective in this case was to find out who's using the late boyfriend's account to chat Megan. It turned out that it was none other than herself. Mission accomplished. Kung anuman ang gagawin ni Shaine sa impormasyon na 'yon, siya na ang bahala.

"How about a compromise?" Alistair raised a finger as his face lit up. "Let's ask Shaine to bring Megan here and tell her the truth—that she's only deluding herself by using Roel's account—and give her the options. She can either continue her delusions or find another way to cope with grief. Let's not decide for her. Let's let her decide for herself."

I nodded. "That sounds reasonable. Kung pipiliin niyang itigil na ang pagme-message sa sarili, mas mabuti. Pero kung pipiliin niyang ituloy pa rin 'yon, whatever happens in the future will be entirely her fault. Ang importante'y mai-present natin sa kanya ang dalawang path na pwede niyang tahakin."

"Diyan ako agree," patango-tangong sabi ni Jamie. "I'll withdraw my suggestion to cut her access sa account ng boyfriend niya."

Loki only gave a thumbs up.

BY LUNCHTIME, we met again in the clubroom. This time, we invited two students over—Shaine and Megan. The latter was surprised to see me and Jamie seated around the table. She must have heard of the QED Club, but she probably did not know that much about its members.

"You said that you have something for my friend?" Shaine asked as they settled down at the other end of our long table.

"We found your friend's phone near the spot where we retrieved the other phones yesterday," I began. Ipinatong ni Jamie ang device sa mesa. "Mukhang na-miss natin siya kahapon dahil dumidilim na no'ng naghanap tayo."

"T-Talaga?!" Nagningning ang mga mata ni Megan at lumawak ang kurba sa kanyang labi.

"Ganitong model ba ang phone mo?" nakangiting tanong ni Jamie.

"Oo, 'yan nga." Aabutin na sana niya ang phone, pero bigla 'yong kinuha ulit ng kasama namin.

"Before we give it back to you, may gusto muna kaming i-share sa inyo," sabi ni Jamie sabay taas ng gadget. Sumeryoso ang mukha niya. She pressed the home button, displaying the couple photo of Megan and Roel. "Aksidente naming nabuksan ang messaging app ng phone na 'to. Guess what we found? May access ang phone na 'to sa account ng ex-boyfriend mo."

Napabuka ang bibig ni Shaine habang nanlaki ang mga mata ni Megan.

"Hindi lang 'yon! Puro sa boyfriend mo ang laman ng phone na 'to. We came to the conclusion na sa kanya talaga 'to at ginagamit mo ngayon."

Umiwas ang mga mata ni Megan, napatingin sa ilalim ng mesa. Napatitig sa kanya si Shaine, tila hindi nakapaniwala. We had not told her about our discovery before this meeting, so this was her first time hearing it.

"I hope you won't take offense at this question." Alistair leaned in the direction of our guest. His voice was calm and soothing as always. "But are you the one messaging yourself using Roel's account?"

Megan shut her eyes closed as she took a deep breath. Silence ensued in the clubroom. Nakatitig kaming lahat sa kanya, hinihintay ang mga susunod na salitang lalabas sa bibig niya.

"Yeah, I am," she admitted, reopening her eyes. She swallowed the lump in her throat. "Ni-reply-an ko ang sarili ko gamit ang account niya base sa kung paano siya usually na nagre-reply. I know it's crazy, but I feel some comfort in it. I didn't have to think kung ano'ng ire-reply ko sa sarili ko. Parang binubulungan niya ako kung ano'ng ita-type. It came out naturally. Kaya na-feel ko na parang kasama ko pa rin siya, na nandyan lang siya't binabantayan ako."

"So you're like playing chess, but you control the white and the black pieces," Loki jumped in the conversation. I shushed him with a glare. This was not the time for his side comments.

"I really, really miss him so much." Her eyes began to well up with tears. Shaine began caressing her back. "I don't know how to move forward, kaya I always take a step back and talk to him as if he's still alive. It's my comfort zone. He was my comfort zone. Can you blame me kung ayaw kong lumabas doon?"

"Naintindihan kita, Meg," mahinahong sabi ni Jamie. "Nawalan na rin ako ng mahal sa buhay. At dinamdam ko talaga 'yon. Ilang weeks or months din akong nagluksa. Pero darating tayo sa point ng buhay natin na kailangan nating mag-move on. Hindi pwedeng hayaan nating nakatali tayo sa nakaraan. Hindi rin mabuti kung tayo mismo ang magtatanikala sa mga sarili natin."

"Ilang beses ko nang narinig ang phrase na move on," tugon ni Megan. She smiled bitterly. "Kahit alam ko ang ibig sabihin niyan, hindi ko alam kung paano gawin. Kapag sinubukan kong talikuran si Roel, mawawalan ako ng saya at sigla sa buhay. Kaya nga pabalik-balik ako sa kanya."

Nagkaroon ng sandaling katahimikan. Hinayaan namin siyang humikbi at si Shaine na i-comfort siya. I might not be able to fully relate to what she was going through. It had been a long while since I lost a loved one. Pero alam ko na ang puwang na iniwan ng isang tao ay hindi basta-basta mapupunan ng kahit sino—kahit gaano katagal pa ang lumipas.

"Kung gano'n, ibabalik namin 'tong phone sa 'yo," sabi ni Jamie sabay abot sa nasabing device. "Kung gusto mong malaman kung paano mag-move on, kailangan mong simulan sa hindi mo sa pag-access sa kanyang account at pag-message sa sarili mo. Magiging mahirap, magiging masakit, pero 'yon ang unang step para makaabante ka."

Inabot ni Megan ang phone at tumitig sa blangkong screen nito.

"Pero kung gusto mong ipagpatuloy 'yang pagme-message sa sarili mo," dugtong ni Jamie, "nasa 'yo na 'yon. Kung 'yan ang nagpapasaya sa 'yo, kung 'yan ang nagbibigay-sigla sa 'yo, go for it. Pero remember na may possibility na masaktan ka sa huli kapag tumagal 'yan. Kung willing kang pagdaanan ang pain na 'yon, ikaw ang bahala."

"Your friend Shaine here must have told you this," I spoke when Jamie took a pause, "but it's best if you consult a therapist to address your grief. I have been through trauma and I have found solace in talking to someone about my experience. My past. My fears. My nightmares. You can visit the guidance and counseling center. Dr. Theresa Pierre is always willing to listen and she gives some good insights. She may be able to help you."

"Thank you." She faintly smiled at me first, then at my fellow club members. "I appreciate your words of advice."

Tumayo na at nagpaalam ang dalawa sa amin. Nagpasalamat muna si Shaine bago siya sumunod sa kanyang kaibigan palabas ng clubroom.

The case was finally solved and closed.

NO CLIENT came to our clubroom after class hours so we decided to call it a day. Alistair offered to drive us home, which Jamie automatically accepted. Ako naman, medyo nagdalawang-isip kasi malapit lang ang apartment namin. Ayaw kong magsayang ng gas at oras ang kaibigan ko para sa amin lalo na't pwede naman naming lakarin ni Loki.

"I have to pass."

The three of us turned in Loki's direction. I thought he would also accept my childhood friend's generous offer. Mas trip niya bang maglakad pauwi ng apartment? That would be a good exercise for him, by the way.

"No," he muttered as he turned to me. He grabbed his bag from the tableside. I was not even thinking out loud, but he answered my question. "I've got to go somewhere else. It may take me an hour or two. You can go ahead, Lorelei."

Now that was intriguing. Lagi siyang deretso uwi pagkatapos ng business namin sa club. He only stayed late if there was a case worth spending more time with.

"Pwede kitang ihatid sa pupuntahan mo," alok ni Alistair. "Unahin ko munang ihatid si Lorelei."

"It's probably out of your way. I appreciate the gesture, but I don't wanna be a bother to you."

"I don't mind. Hassle ang commute sa mga oras na ito dahil uwian na. Mas convenient para sa iyo kung sasabay ka na sa amin. Mas safe at secure ka pa."

"Pax et Lumen Memorial Park," Loki said. "That's where I intend to go."

I tossed a glance at Alistair whose brows furrowed, then at Jamie who looked curious. They must be thinking, "Why would Loki go to a cemetery right after class hours?" 'Yon din kasi ang tanong ko sa aking sarili.

But it did not take a minute for me to realize the reason. This was not the first time I had heard of that place. In fact, I had already gone there with Loki in July. Birthday noon ni Rhea kaya naisipan niyang dumalaw roon at magbigay-respeto bago pumasok sa school. He even bought flowers for her.

Given everything that had happened in the past two days, I got a hunch on why he was going there now. He might not have made it obvious, but our recently solved case must have affected him in some way.

"Huwag mo na akong ihatid sa apartment, Al," sabi ko. "Samahan ko na si Loki."

"Teka! Teka!" Napakaway si Jamie para kunin ang atensyon namin. "Ako rin, sasamahan ko si Loki! Makikiramay ako sa kung sinuman ang ililibing doon."

"What?" Loki flickered his gaze from me to Jamie. "I have a personal business there. Why are you coming with me? Don't you wanna go home and take some well deserved rest?"

"Kung saan ka pupunta, doon din kami pupunta," pilit ni Jamie. "Bibigyan ka naman namin ng moment of privacy. Tatayo kami sa malayo kung gusto mo."

"Never mind." Loki went for the door. "I'll go straight home."

"It's better for you to go there," I said before he could walk out of the room. He came to halt, his back turned to us. "Kung may kailangan kang i-address doon, mas makabubuti para sa 'yo. Just to be clear, ayaw naming manghimasok sa kung anuman ang balak mong gawin. But we want to show you our support. That's the least we can do for you."

He glanced back at me over his shoulder. "And what makes you think that I need your support?"

"Because we're your friends," I said. "Or at least, we want to be your friends. We want to be there for you. It won't sit well with us kung hahayaan ka naming mag-isa."

"I have the faintest idea why exactly you're going there or what Lorelei meant," Alistair spoke. "But I want to help you in any way that I can."

"Ako rin! Ako rin!" pahabol ni Jamie. "Kung may pinagdaraanan ka man, gaya ng hini-hint ni Lorelei, nandito kami para sa 'yo. Hindi ka nag-iisa, Loki. We're a club here, remember?"

Loki hung his head low as he heaved a sigh. "Fine. It looks like you all wanna be in this together."

We grabbed our bags from the chairs and exited the clubroom. Dumeretso kaming apat sa parking lot ng campus. Alistair entered his car first, started its engine and turned on the air conditioner. He rolled down the windows to let the heat out. Nang okay na, sinenyasan niya kaming pumasok.

I sat on the shotgun ride while Loki and Jamie settled down on the backseat. When we were all ready, Alistair drove the car out of the campus and onto the highway. I watched as the buildings and other vehicles blurred past us. Nang may namataan kaming flower shop sa roadside, ipinahinto muna ni Loki ang sasakyan at saka bumaba. Pagbalik niya, may bitbit na siyang basket ng mga puting bulaklak. The fragrance was pleasant.

Alistair parked the car at a vacant slot in the parking area. The sun was about to set on the horizon and the skies were painted orange. We were greeted with a strong blow of fresh air. Sa sobrang dami ng mga puno rito, ideal para sa mga gustong magmuni-muni. The somber mood and the quietness formed a perfect combination for solemn moments. Wala masyadong tao sa oras na ito. May iilang bumibisita sa mga nitso. May iilan ding nagdya-jogging at nagba-bike.

Loki led the way, bringing the basket in his right hand. Sasabayan sana siya ni Jamie, pero agad kong hinila ang braso niya. Sinamaan pa nga niya ako ng tingin. I shook my head in response. Umaliwalas ang mukha niya, malamang naintindihan kung bakit ko ginawa 'yon.

We let Loki have his moment of privacy in front of Rhea's grave. Ipinatong niya roon ang basket ng bulaklak at sandaling yumuko. We stood a few meters away from him, just under the shade of an old acacia tree.

"Her name's Rhiannon delos Reyes, more fondly known as Rhea," I uttered as I observed Loki standing still. "I haven't met her in person because she died months before I joined the club. She was her first legit member. If he's the captain of the ship, she's her first mate. Dinamdam niya ang pagkawala ng tanging tao na mako-consider niyang kaibigan."

"Ngayon ba ang birthday o death anniversary niya kaya pinuntahan siya ni Loki?" nakasimangot na tanong ni Jamie. "Pwede naman niyang bisitahin sa weekend kung wala namang okasyon ngayon."

I sucked in a breath. "Let's just say that the case we recently solved had some parts that were relatable to him in a personal level. It somewhat reminded him of his own situation."

"Is that why he said he knew a teensy bit about loss?" Alistair asked.

I nodded without turning to him.

"Did he also . . ." His voice trailed off. "Ah, never mind. It's not my business to know."

Ten minutes later, Loki slowly walked toward us, his hands inside his pockets. "I've given it some thought. You're all members of the QED Club. She was a member too. Perhaps, it's only appropriate for you to meet her." He spun on his heel and walked back to the gravestone.

Nagkatinginan muna kaming tatlo bago tumango at sumunod sa kanya. This time, we stood shoulder to shoulder. I looked down and read the name engraved on the stone.

RHIANNON DE LOS REYES
Born: July 14, 2000
Died: January 14, 2017

"Lorelei, Jamie and Alistair, meet Rhea," Loki said, his voice cracked a bit. Seeing him get a little emotional was not an everyday sight. This was such a rare occasion where his mask fell off. "Rhea, meet the new members of our club. I'm sure you'd love to have a chat with them and get to know them more."

My lips twisted into a faint smile. A part of me wanted to meet her in person. Gusto ko pa siyang makilala. Gusto kong marinig ang mga kuwento niya tungkol sa club at sa cases na kanilang na-solve noon. Unfortunately, that was not possible anymore.

"The four of us will carry on the legacy of the QED Club," Loki declared, staring down the gravestone. "You may not be with us anymore, but you're still part of this. Forever."

He fished his phone out of his pocket. Akala ko noong una'y may tatawagan siya. I glanced sideways and caught a glimpse of him accessing his emails. Aksidente kong nasilip ang pag-view niya sa kanyang email thread kay . He quickly tapped the "delete all" key. Then he pocketed his phone again. I pretended to not have seen anything.

"That's it," Loki breathed. "Time to go home? It's getting dark already."

We all nodded as we walked away from Rhea's grave.

What awaited us in the future was absolutely uncertain. But I hoped that the four of us would be able to keep the legacy that Loki had started with Rhea and build a bond that could transcend from just being clubmates—a friendship that could last a lifetime.

In the meantime, we would do what we had always done best: chase cases and solve problems.

—QED—

And that's the end of Part Four: Chronicler of the Club and the conclusion of Origins of the QED Club! Thank you so much for reading!

If you've enjoyed this story and you've got some thoughts to share, let me know by posting or tweeting with the hashtag #QEDOrigins!