Trigger Warnings: homophobic people, swearing (will only mention it this once, these are not filthy with language but do have swearing in them), Catholic/Christian religion rewrite, trans Jesus (ftm), good Satan

Comment if there are any I missed

There were few things Satan got involved with in the human world. When he did, it was often because the humans had pissed him off with their stupidity and since he knew God couldn't interfere, he decided to take matters into his own hands. Contrary to popular human belief, he wasn't some creature of nightmares, bent on human destruction and leading them to sin against God. No, he was more of a morally grey creature who enjoyed punishing humans who deserved it. As it is, there's a lot of humans who deserve to be punished. Unfortunately, his reputation grew warped in the humans' minds, turning him into the villain when really he was more like the enforcement of God after death. She couldn't lay a hand on them, that wasn't allowed, but she could turn them over to her son and he could lay out her law to them.

There had been a lot of greats over the years, things he'd gotten into. Various movements: all the feminist movements, many of what the humans now call LGBTQIA+ movements, the slavery and now BLM movements, and multiple religious movements, from protecting the other religions to changing their stances on certain topics.

The one he's at currently, a mix of feminism and LGBTQIA+, is perfect. From where he is, in a rainbow shirt, black leather jacket, ripped dark grey jeans with black fishnet underneath the classy rips, plus his genderfluid flag wrapped around his waist, he can hear and see the homophobic religious protestors. They keep yelling things about needing Jesus, how these people needed to open a Bible, how God would be disappointed in them. He wonders how'd they feel if they knew God was agender but went by whatever pronouns she felt like at the moment. This century is she/her so far. Or how they might feel if it turned out that Jesus was a trans male he'd helped transition due to the patriarchal mindset of the times. Or that he'd taken Jesus on a roadtrip with a couple demons and angels, see the sites, get a feel for the world. Or that the Bible was a bundle of mostly lies with loose ties to the actual events plus a bunch of misinterpretations and incorrect translations.

"You are all just minions of Satan!" one yells loudly.

Satan sighs. Now that's just rude. He snaps his fingers, taking off the mirage that veils his true power, and stalks over to the protestors. "Come again?" he snarls, knowing everyone in the area can see who he really is.

"You- they- they're just your minions from hell," the protester repeats.

"Oh honey, you think these queens and kings and rulers could ever be minions?"

"You're all going to hell!" another one yells.

He laughs. "Correction: everyone in this movement will be welcomed home by God. You, however, I have a special torture pit for people like you." All their posters and hateful messages burn up with a snap as he turns and enters the rally. If I'm going to reveal myself I might as well enjoy it, he thinks, gifting everyone the flags of their identity, and ally flags for the allies while summoning his demonic crown. "Let's get this party started!" he yells.