Origami Girl

Chapter 33: When the Cicadas Weep II

"In the cicada's cry

No sign can foretell

How soon he must die"

-Matsuo Bashou

My eyes immediately widened in shock. I accidentally let go of the keys in my now unclenched palm, the cold steel crashing onto the concrete pavement. The young man looked up at me, biting his lip as his palm pressed against his abdomen.

What have I done?

"W-What is wrong with you?" he hissed, his face grimaced.

"I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry," I blurted out as I rushed over to him, picking up my keys I had dropped. "Are you all right?"

"It hurts like hell," he raised his voice. "Were you trying to kill me?"

"No, no!" I said, my heart thumping in fear and panic. "I-I thought you were trying to rob me!"

"Do I look like a robber to you?" he shot back, his deep brown eyes glaring at me.

"L-look, I'm really, really sorry," I mumbled. "I didn't mean to!"

Shuuya-kun lifted up his shirt to check on his abdomen, before letting his shirt down again. I didn't really get to see it, since it was covered beneath him as he bent over.

The young man finally managed to stand up straight, and without a word, he turned around and started walking back in the other direction. Feeling guilty, I quickly rushed up to him, and placed my hand on his shoulder. He was walking pretty fast, so it was pretty tough for me to keep up with him. What more, I was still shaking and jittery, still reeling in from whatever shock that still remained.

I felt something damp and sticky in my hand that was holding the keys, so in passing I took a look at it. Only then did I realise that the keys were stained with a dark maroon smear, the dark red smudging the flesh of my palm along with it.

"D-Do you need to go to the clinic?" I asked him, worried that he might need medical attention. "Is it bleeding?"

"Well, it is," he said, his tone rather annoyed.

"You know, there's a clinic nearby, we could take you there," I offered. "It should still be open by now, it's a twenty-four hour clinic."

"Look, I didn't really get to see the extent of how bad you hit me, but let's just get it cleaned up and treated first at your house," he said. "You do have a first aid kit at home don't you?"

"Yeah, we do," I told him. "It's in the bathroom."

"Fine," he said curtly. "It'll do."

The two of us walked back down the road, and we reached the house not too long after. We didn't talk much on the remaining length of road back, and I lifted my hand from his broad shoulder. I felt really bad over what I had done, but what had happened had happened, and now the most important thing was to assess how much damage I did. Groceries could wait another day.

My mother was somewhat surprised to see the two of us back so quick, but I told her that my cousin had hurt himself, and that we were going to assess the situation. Worry started to paint my mother's face, but she seemed relieved when my cousin himself smiled at her and told her not to fret too much about it.

"I'm training to be a nurse after all," he reassured her. "I know what I'm doing. . .I hope."

"Well, how did you get hurt in the first place?" my mother asked.

"It's a pretty long story," I said, trailing off in an awkward giggle.

"Well, got tend to whatever you need first," the lady said. "I'll just go send your brother out. He'll be fine by himself."

"Thanks."

I led my cousin to my bedroom and told him to wait for me while I went to retrieve the first aid kit. When I returned, first aid kit in my arms, I found him seated at the edge of my bed. Walking over to him, I placed the box beside him on the bed.

"Well, there you go," I told him. "Use whatever you need."

"Eh?" he said, raising his eyebrow. "You stab me and now you won't even want to help me treat the wound? How nice of you."

The young man seemed so strange being so passive-aggressive, but given what happened, I honestly thought it was justified. Well, at least I knew I wasn't the only one who could speak like that.

"Fine," I said, opening the box. "But don't complain if it hurts or anything, since I'm not the nurse here."

"Well, then I'll just tell you what to do then," he chuckled. "It's not that hard."

"That's easy for you to say," I mumbled, frustrated that he seemed to find amusement at me doing his bidding. "Seriously, I'll smear the alcohol all over the wound if you really want me to."

"Well," he said, cocking his head back. "You wouldn't do that."

"What makes you say that?" I shot back, rummaging the box for the bottle of rubbing alcohol. "If you won't stop teasing me I would do it for real."

"You look too guilty to even try hurting me more," he said. "You should really stop making threats when it's written all over your face."

"Fine," I heaved a sigh.

I eventually found the rubbing alcohol and took out a gauze pad. I was about to unscrew the cap of the bottle when I realised that Shuuya-kun hadn't lifted up his shirt

"Could you lift your shirt?" I asked. "Unless you want your shirt to be stained with alcohol."

"You forgot something," he said, leaning forward, his chin propped against his palm.

I looked in front of me. I already had the gauze pad and rubbing alcohol ready. What else did he want? Well forgive me for trying to apply first aid on a nurse who already clearly knew what was supposed to be done, but had deliberately left everything to me.

"I already have everything," I said, looking at him. "What do you mean?"

"Well, have you washed your hands?" he asked, stretching his arms in front of him. "That's what I meant."

"Oh," I mumbled in reply. "I forgot."

Screwing the cap back into place, I placed the materials back in the box and got off my knees. Heading over to the bathroom, I turned on the tap and let it run, before scrubbing my palms with soap. It was true, I was pretty mad at him earlier, but I couldn't help but feel bad over what I had done. It was my fault anyway that he was now injured.

I returned to the room, heart thumping in my chest. The young man was still seated on the edge of my bed, swinging his legs in front of him childishly.

"I've washed them," I said to him, presenting my squeaky clean palms to him.

"That's better," he said.

With that, he lifted his shirt, revealing his slightly toned abs.

"You see, there's three stab wounds here," he explained, pointing to a reddened area just above his groin. "You just dab on the rubbing alcohol to clean the wound, then you put the gauze on. Remember to use the tape to place the gauze in place."

I only nodded wordlessly. His finger circled the area I had punched him in. There were a few cuts in the area, one wound slightly more noticeable than the others. I guessed that was where he bore most of the impact. Slight traces of blood were still around the dully reddened gashes. It seemed like some bruising took place, I guess that was how hard I must have hit him. Feeling bad, I rushed over to the bedside, knelt down and started to unscrew the cap of the rubbing alcohol bottle again.

Truth be told, I wasn't really focusing all my attention at the wounds. I didn't mean to, but his faintly toned muscles were far more interesting to the eye. I knew he worked out, and I had seen him shirtless on a few occasions, but now that I had to touch them? It was nerve-wrecking. My heart thumped in my chest so loudly that I doubt my cousin couldn't hear my deafening pulse.

I felt my cheeks reddening as I pretended to take another glance towards the wound, but in reality I was just looking at the traces of his abdominal muscles. His skin was slightly dotted with sweat as he lifted his shirt up.

"You know what," he mumbled seemingly to himself. "I might as well take my shirt off. You okay with that?"

"S-Sure," I said, as I cut off a piece of tape. "Go ahead."

"It'll be easier for you, just in case my shirt gets in the way," he said, before he stretched, slipping of the dark blue tee-shirt and tossing it aside.

The young man, baring his chest and all, leaned back, his arms behind him, propping him up against the bed. I inched in closer, bringing the cotton wool soaked with rubbing alcohol with me but I couldn't help but get nervous.

"Hey calm down," he said, raising his eyebrow. "It's not too big of a deal. It's just a few cuts. What are you shaking for?"

I felt my cheeks get warm as my hands trembled in front of me. Of course he would notice.

"N-No," I mumbled. "I was just afraid that the rubbing alcohol could make it even more painful."

"Well, I can bear it," he reassured me. "Hey, don't you remember? I once got my ass beat by a bunch of kids in school, so some alcohol on a cut isn't really much to me."

"Well, then don't complain if I'm not doing it too professionally," I replied, holding the cotton wool hovering over his abdomen.

I went for the largest wound first, dabbing the cotton wool onto the young man's flesh. I watched as his abs contracted and his fist clenching as he braced the pain. I tried my best not to touch his skin, but once he himself moved and my finger ended up brushing against his body. Although brief, I could distinctively remember how damp and warm his skin was.

As I tried my best to focus on the task at hand, I couldn't help from stealing glances at his chest and stomach. His pecs rose up and down with each and every breath. His eyes were on my shaking hands, but I doubted that he noticed where my eyes were at.

After what felt like forever, I breathed a sigh of relief as I taped the gauze pad over the wound. Making sure it was secure, I finally lifted my fingers off him.

The young man stretched and rolled his shoulders, his muscles flexing as he did so. His eyes were busy examining the wound I had just finished dressing, his fingers feeling around the area. Those deep brown pupils of his were nearly hidden from me with the veil of his thick, black fringe.

"You did a pretty good job," he praised me, looking up.

I could only offer a slight smile as I got up on my feet, putting back the medical supplies into the box. The young man seemed all right, even tapping his foot against the floor. Seeing that he was fine, the guilt and pity I felt earlier somewhat vanished. He was all right after all, and he could probably had done up the wound by himself. The thought of that added on to the already building irritation I had when I first arrived home.

"Hey," he said. "Why don't you go rest or something? I'll keep the box."

Even so, he made his offer too late, and I had already latched the box. I picked up the box, and headed to the washroom, pretending I hadn't heard him. I placed the first aid kit to back where I found it, before turning on the tap scrubbing the scent of rubbing alcohol off my fingertips.

As I rubbed the spaces between my fingers with soap, I couldn't help but feel a strong sense of humiliation creep up to me. The young man looked fine, and I felt like he just used me to help him with his wounds because he can. And not only that, it seemed like he seemed to derive some form of entertainment by making me feel uncomfortable. I glanced at myself in the mirror and sighed. I hated that he could make me feel uncomfortable in my own home, where I was finally looking forward to getting a much-needed breather.

My aunt herself said that it was his idea to sleepover at our place, so there was no other to blame but the young man himself.

I dried my hands, dabbing my palms dry with the hand towel hanging by the side. Sighing, I looked up at the mirror, and it was then I saw him, standing in the doorway. He still hasn't worn his shirt, the dark blue piece of clothing hanging from his right shoulder. As much as I kind of liked seeing what I saw, I wished he could put a shirt on.

"Are you going to keep walking around like that?" I asked, trying my best to hide my irritation.

The young man walked up to the sink, so I stepped to the side, uncomfortable that he was so close to me.

"Well, my old shirt got torn, so I'm going to get another one," he said, bending down as he turned on the tap. "You have a problem with that?"

Shuuya-kun cupped his palms underneath the running water, and brought it to his face. I had nothing to say to him, and I didn't want to be around his presence, so I tried to swiftly leave the room.

Nonetheless I felt my arm being grabbed in that all too familiar grip of his.

"What do you want," I sighed. "I'm tired, I want to sleep."

The young man stayed silent as he rubbed the water off his face with his other hand, before dabbing his palm on his sweatpants, leaving a damp mark where his palm had been.

"I needed to talk to you," he said, his deep brown eyes looking at me through the gaps of his fringe.

"Can we do it some other time?" I protested, yanking his hand away.

"Look, I-I just wanted to say that you've been acting pretty cranky recently," he mumbled, rubbing his palm against the back of his head. "Is everything all right?"

"Look, I don't want to be disturbed right now," I said, shaking my head. "Maybe it'll be for the best if you spent more time away from me. I need my own space."

"Is there anything wrong with me that I make you so uncomfortable?" he asked, cocking his head.

I sighed deeply.

"I said I don't want to be bothered with this," I pressed. "So if you please, I will get going now."

It was infinitesimal, but few details could escape my vision. The right edge of the young man's thin lips curled up in a sly, miniscule smirk. But what came next caught me off guard.

"You like me don't you?"

There I was, a young, almost twenty year-old woman, standing in front of the bathroom door of her own home, in front of her topless cousin who was clad only in sweatpants, listening to him accuse me of having feelings for him. I glared at him, batting my eyelids.

"E-Excuse me?" I said, frowning. "What did you say?"

"Well," he said, his arms open. "You've asked me to sleep with you before."

"That was different," I shot back. "I only did that because I was lonely."

"We can do it again," he smirked. "We can do it for real this time."

What he said nearly made me want to throw up whatever little I had for dinner. I wonder what got into his food, that didn't sound like the young man I knew. I folded my arms and cocked my head, trying to hide the obviously chilling effect those words had on me.

"You sound pretty confident huh?" I said, nodding my head. "For a man with no friends."

"And you sound pretty bold for a lonely little girl," he said, taking a step towards me.

I took a step back, entering the hallway behind me.

"You're acting all cranky, it's because you like me don't you?" he said. "Just admit it."

"Stop being so full of yourself," I snapped back. "You're only saying that just to make yourself feel better."

"If you don't like me, then why did you all those things for me?" he blurted out, getting unreasonably agitated.

"What things?"

"I-I don't know, I mean, you won't give someone a massage unless you like that person don't you?" he retorted, his face getting red.

"Well, the same could be said for you," I replied. "I have always wondered why you always seem too nice to me. Too nice that you have to push me against the door to get the ladle out of my hand because you insisted that you did the cooking. I wonder why?"

The young man looked down for a while, averting his gaze. A short, awkward silence descended upon the room, as if my words were left dangling in the air. Shuuya-kun finally looked up, his gaze gentler this time.

"That's because. . ." he mumbled.

"Because what?" I interrogated.

Shuuya-kun took a deep breath.

"That's because I like you."

  -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  

The young woman looked at me from across the table in disbelief, as if she was about to spit out the coffee she had just sipped.

"So," Sayaka-chan said, once she had swallowed the liquid in her mouth. "So you're telling me a young man confessed to you, so you just laughed and walked off?"

"I didn't mean to!" I defended myself, as I picked up my frappucino. "I just didn't know what to do, given the situation."

"But this certainly isn't the first time you've gotten a confession from a boy," she said. "The very least you could tell him was that you'd think about it, even if you meant it as a rejection."

"I was too nervous I guess," I said.

"Yeah, and you made yourself look like some sadist who enjoys hurting other people's feelings," she replied. "Anyway, so how has it been between the two of you?"

"We've pretty much ignored each other these past few days," I told her. "The other day my mother and aunt decided to head to the morning fish market by the docks and he just volunteered to follow them."

"But you can't just avoid each other, you know that?" she said. "I mean, you're living with him for goodness's sake."

"Right now, I have seriously no idea what I should say to him," I answered. "I really don't."

"Well, for a start you should at least apologise for laughing off his confession and telling him you didn't mean to," the young woman continued. "Well, even if you still want time to think over his confession you could buy time that way, I guess."

It was then when the young man arrived, clad in a dark red flannel shirt and jeans. A baseball cap rested above his head of thick, brown hair. It was none other than Kashiwagi-kun.

"Hey girls," he said, placing his brown haversack down on the chair beside Sayaka-chan. "Sorry I'm late."

"Where have you been?" I questioned him. "We agreed to meet at ten-thirty."

"Well, what time is it now?" he asked.

"It's nearly eleven," Sayaka-chan said, clearly irritated.

"Well I overslept," he admitted. "Sorry."

"What were you doing last night?" I asked.

"I was doing some research for my summer assignment," he responded, sinking into the chair. "You know, medical school."

"Must be pretty busy training to be a doctor," Sayaka-chan commented. "But I'm sure you could handle it."

"Well, that might be the biggest overstatement I've heard recently," the young man chuckled. "Have you girls bought your drinks?"

Sayaka-chan and I merely looked at him, and the young man's attention went directly to the table in front of us.

"Ah, you two must have gotten thirsty waiting for me I guess. . ." he muttered. "If you'll excuse me."

Kashiwagi-kun stood up and walked towards the counter to order his drink. Once he was out of earshot, the two of us resumed where we had left off.

"But what should I say to him?" I asked, now that Kashiwagi-kun was gone. "Should I give him a definite answer? A yes or a no?"

"Honestly, only you can answer that question yourself," the young woman sighed, bringing her cup of black coffee closer to her lips. "I can't tell you what to do when it comes to that."

"I don't know either," I mumbled in reply, burying my face in my palms. "That's why I'm asking you."

"You have to think through this long and hard," she advised me. "I mean, you'll be staying with him for the next two years, so whatever choice you make, you better think it through."

"I guess that's all I can do right now," I responded, taking a sip of my frappucino. "He's a nice guy. . . But I don't know."

"You'll have to figure that out yourself," she replied. "Whether you want to be together with him or not."

"I have a feeling that he's hiding something from me," I confessed. "It's just that. . . Something doesn't feel right."

I had a bad feeling as I said those words. Distrust, suspicion, they were the same feelings I harboured when I saw him take those pills from the upper cupboard. If the both of us were to be in a relationship, I really want to get that uneasiness out of the way.

Sayaka-chan put down her coffee cup.

"If you feel that he's keeping secrets, then what does it matter to you?" she questioned. "Everyone has secrets."

"I don't know, it's just. . ." I replied. "If we get into a relationship then I feel that secrets would just hinder us, you know what I mean?"

Sayaka-chan sighed, giving her shoulders a slight shrug.

"It's funny how I'm always the one giving out relationship advice when I for a fact have never been in one in the first place," she said jokingly.

"Well, you're the only one I could ask," I giggled. "I can't possibly ask Kashiwagi-kun about these kinds of things."

"Considering you broke his heart," she added coolly.

"How did you know that?" I asked.

The young woman gave a minute laugh.

"Well, that very same night after you rejected him, he called me," she said, nodding her head. "So that's how I know."

"So. . .He told you everything, I guess?" I said.

Sayaka-chan turned to look behind her. Kashiwagi-kun was still at the counter. The young woman leaned forward, palm against the side of her mouth.

"Not only that," she whispered. "He was crying."

"Oh dear," I answered, my palm over my lips. "I feel really bad now that I overreacted."

"It's fine, but don't tell him I told you though," the young woman said, adjusting her fringe. "He's that type of guy who likes to act tough in front of girls but is actually pretty soft in the inside."

"The acting tough part seems to remind me of someone I used to know," I said, my lips curling into a sad smile.

"I'm sorry about what you had to go through," she said in a soft, solemn tone. "How have you been coping? I wanted to ask you that earlier but I didn't want to sound too direct."

"It's fine," I told her. "The grief comes in bouts, but I'm over the worst of it."

"Well, the very least he left you with are the fond memories you had with him," she said. "Just try to remember those when you feel sad. Don't blame yourself over what happened, I'm sure he had his own reasons. But what has happened, had happened, and we can't change a thing when it comes to that."

"Yeah. . ."

The brown-haired boy came back not too long after, carrying a caramel frappucino in one hand and a large sandwich in the other.

"I'm hungry," he said, when he noticed the two of us looking at him. "You guys were talking right, don't mind me."

The young man placed the sandwich down on the table and took his seat. Neither Sayaka-chan nor I resumed our previous conversation.

"So. . .What did I miss?" he asked, scanning the both of us.

"Nothing much," Sayaka-chan finally said after a short, awkward silence. "Just personal girl stuff."

"I see," he said as he took a sip from his straw.

"Anyway, it's been a long time since I've met the both of you," she said, starting a conversation. "How's university?"

"It's bearable," I told her. "I guess right now the workload in the law faculty isn't as heavy as it is in medicine."

"It's just a matter of organising your time," Kashiwagi-kun said. "If you can manage fine with the time that you have, then everything goes well."

"How about you, Sayaka-chan?" I asked. "I haven't heard from you for quite a while. How's fashion college?"

"Ah, about that. . ." she nodded, adjusting her fringe. "I'm now in the Agricultural College."

"Eh?" I asked, surprised. "What happened?"

"You know. . ." she said. "As you mature I guess you learn how to put aside and let go of unrealistic dreams, and let pragmatism take its place."

"So you swapped from fashion to agriculture?" I reiterated.

"Very much so," she replied. "Considering that my family owns some land up north, and my uncle still owns the farm, I guess that I should take up a degree in agriculture, so I could contribute at least. Besides, agricultural specialists are much more needed in society than fashion designers. After all, there are fewer people to work the fields nowadays, so we have to discover new ways to sustain our population."

"You make sense," I told her. "At least you've found something worthwhile doing."

"It's much more of a duty I guess," she replied. "But I don't mind at all. It's an interesting subject."

"Well you've never really seemed the fashionable type anyway," I said.

"It's just a hobby for now," she answered, picking up her cup. "But you know, the more I think of it, the more I feel that fashion is a waste of time and money. The industry, I mean."

"I get what you mean," I said to her. "I personally don't feel like I follow those blogs as much as I used to."

"People change," she replied, looking down into her cup of coffee. "That's just how people are, I guess."

We fell silent for a while, and as if I followed a cue, I picked up my frappucino and sipped on the straw. The serene, contemplative silence was broken when the young man spoke up.

"The two of you seem to get so deep nowadays," he chuckled. "I miss the old days when the two of you would talk about relationships and fashion much more."

"We're stepping into the world of adults now," I said, somewhat solemnly. "It's kind of scary to think about it. It seems like only yesterday we were teenagers in senior high school."

"I guess it's that kind of dread when you realise that moments don't really last forever and that everything is transient," the young man said. "It's like the world is moving ahead in a gushing current, and you're just swept away by it whether you like it or not."

"Look who's being so philosophical now," Sayaka-chan chuckled. "I think this adulthood bug has gotten you too."

A sudden burst of hysterical laughter pierced into the otherwise hushed atmosphere of the coffee shop, and heads turned to see where it came from. The group of senior high school girls in the corner, now ashamed, looked down towards their table and the pieces of paper they had in front of them, seemingly praying for the scrutinising eyes of the rest of the patrons to go away. And after a while, they did.

"We were like that once," Kashiwagi-kun commented, once we had all turned back to face each other.

"I guess the looming adult world that approaches nearer every day seem to have gotten us all pretty jaded huh," I said, half-jokingly.

Likewise the other two laughed slightly, those kinds of laughs that one would make in an attempt to lighten up an otherwise serious or daunting topic. It failed nonetheless. I sighed.

"It's such a depressing world to think of it," I said, leaning back into my chair. "You're born, you study, you work, then you die. And if you're lucky, you die early, just like how he did. By his own hand at that."

"Are you saying that you want to go the way he did?" Kashiwagi-kun asked, frowning slightly. "I'm sorry to ask, but are you contemplating to do such a thing to yourself?"

"No, no, I'm sorry if the way I phrased it made it sound like something it isn't," I chuckled awkwardly. "What I meant is, I'm just –I'm just really tired, I guess. That's the best way I could phrase it. Like I know there are good things in life, and I'm really grateful for those things, but you know, ever since Yukino-kun died, I've been thinking a lot about death and the like. I've been thinking about life, and what keeps people going. Sometimes I just feel that the fatigue, the tiredness, do you think it's worth it? It's not even a choice we make to be born, to go through life as we know it. I know, I'm probably just rambling nonsense but I just feel that sometimes. . .Why do we even live? What even is in it for us?"

Kashiwagi-kun looked down at his still-untouched sandwich, before looking up at me again.

"Well, I guess it's natural for you to feel that way, especially after what happened," he began. "But I guess sometimes we all question why we're even put on this earth. And I know this sounds rather cliché, but I guess the only answer I have for you know is that you have to find a purpose to why you're even breathing right now. You have to find something to live for, something worth living for."

I kept quiet, sipping onto my frappucino. Sayaka-chan said nothing, looking down, seemingly deep in thought.

"I guess you have a point," I finally said after a while. "Thank you for that."

"Well then," the young man said. "Let's talk about something else."

Sayaka-chan nodded.

"Have any of you heard about Kameko-chan? How has she been?" Sayaka-chan said, changing the topic of conversation.

Kashiwagi-kun and I both shook our heads.

"I haven't heard of her ever since we graduated," I told the both of them. "I met her at the funeral. . .A-And she seemed to place the blame on me for whatever happened to Yukino-kun."

"Don't listen to whatever she told you," Kashiwagi-kun asserted. "No one was at fault, and you best remember that. There was nothing anyone could have done."

"But I was the one closest to him," I mumbled. "In fact, I once saw his wrists. . .But I didn't press on. S-So I guess in a sense, it was kind of my fault. I was too selfish, and that selfishness snatched Yukino-kun away from his family, from me."

"Look, don't say that," the young man stressed, leaning forward. "It was nobody's fault. Nakayama chose to do what he did, and that's it. It's what he did by his own choice."

"But I must have certainly played a part to drive him to do something like that," I mumbled. "I-I mean-"

The words seemed to have fallen short, and only air left my slightly parted lips. I sighed, and shook my head.

"It's no use," I said in defeat. "I don't know if I could ever get over it."

Sayaka-chan looked at Kashiwagi-kun, before turning to look at me again.

"Like you said," she said, a slight, sad smile on her lips. "The grief comes in bouts and waves. I'm sure that there are a few moments that you are happy or distracted to say the least. It's okay to grieve, I know you want to move on, but it takes time."

"Yes, yes," I mumbled, nodding my head. "I guess you're right. It'll pass after a while."

"It will," Kashiwagi-kun added, tilting his head back. "The grief won't really go away, but you'll just get used to it and make room. There's more to the world than just gloom and doom."

"I know that's true," I replied. "I'm trying, I guess. It's not very easy, but I'm trying."

"We know you are," Sayaka-chan said. "It's hard, but you'll make it through."

"Yeah."

Kashiwagi-kun finally started on his sandwich, being preoccupied with talking to me earlier.

"Let's talk about something else," he said after a while. "Sayaka, have you told her about your swap?"

"Yeah, I did," she replied.

"Tell me more then, please," I said. "I'm sorry, I really didn't mean to dominate the conversation to make it revolve around me. I-I mean, sometimes I get tired of talking about my problems, it's tiring."

"It's fine, don't worry about it," she added. "Anyway, what do you want to know?"

Sayaka-chan explained to me about what she was doing in the agricultural college, and I'd have to say that it was a rather interesting choice. She told me about what they studied, and she had recently finished a biology module regarding plant growth. Kashiwagi-kun on the other hand told us both how he was still going to be on campus until his fourth year, where he was going to try for residency.

"How about you?" Sayaka-chan asked me. "What's going on in Law?"

"Well, right now. . ." I mumbled. "I have a French project, but the deadline is way after the summer break, but I've been doing a little bit of research here and there."

"Ah, you take French too?" Sayaka-chan asked, seemingly impressed.

"Well my friend is pretty fluent in French," I replied. "So she helps me out here and there."

"It's nice that you've made new friends," the young woman said, nodding. "It's good that you know new people."

We talked for quite a while following it, finishing up our drinks before we decided to take a walk around the area. It had been a while since I've been around Hakodate, so it was a pretty much welcome change. Picking up our belongings, we headed outside.

The summer sun was shining brightly above, the glaring rays softened by the occasional blanket of white cloud. It felt god to be walking with the two of them again. It felt just like old times, when we walked through and fro from the library and when we hanged out after school. It was a nice feeling.

We decided to walk towards the English Consulate, just for the fun of it. There wasn't really any other reason other than that we just wanted to spend some time together, and that the flower gardens around the old buildings seemed like a pretty sweet spot to do so. Besides, the last time I went to the area was around two years ago, so it was nice to see the place again. It was also with Kameko-chan, and I haven't met her ever since the funeral.

"When did you get those earrings?" Sayaka-chan asked Kashiwagi-kun as the three of us walked down the street towards the junction.

"Ah, these?" the young man answered, bringing his right palm to the bottom of his ear lobe. "Well I got them right after I got into university."

"What for?" the young woman asked.

"Well, I thought they looked nice. . ." he mumbled, scratching the back of his head with his other palm.

"I think they look nice," I said, joining in the conversation.

The two of them looked at me. I noticed the slightly red glow on Kashiwagi-kun's pale cheeks.

"T-Thanks," he muttered. "That's really nice of you."

"I meant it," I said, giving him a slight smile. "They look good on you."

"And I've always wanted to ask you," Sayaka-chan asked after a short moment of silence. "What's with your hair? Wasn't it brown enough already?"

"I wanted it to be more reddish," he replied. "You know, I'm just trying out new things, just for fun. There's no harm anyway."

That short moment seemed so light-hearted and trivial, but in the midst of that, I felt this faint, faraway tinge of loneliness. Hearing them talk about taking steps forward, trying out new things, from Sayaka-chan swapping her majors to Kashiwagi-kun dyeing his hair, it hit me that I had never dared to try anything new. Perhaps I was slightly neophobic, but I couldn't really tell. But what I could really tell was that it made me feel left out.

It was that sad, miserable feeling, watching others move ahead, progressing with their lives, while you seem to be stuck there, a black-and-white photo, still warped onto those bygone memories you fully know will never come back. It was a horrible state to be in.

We didn't do much at the Consulate. The flowerbeds were in full bloom, so the three of us took a walk in the Consulate grounds. I would have loved to see and admire the different delicate flowers, but I had lost the mood.

It wasn't that long before we decided to leave. Sayaka-chan said that she had to meet with one of her course mates at her university, so the three of us said our goodbyes, Sayaka-chan walking in the other direction, leaving me alone with Kashiwagi-kun.

"So," the young man said awkwardly once Sayaka-chan had disappeared down a corner. "You heading home now?"

"I guess. . ." I told him. "I don't know."

"Do you want to take a walk or something?" he asked. "We could go down to the harbour, or somewhere else. B-But only if you want to."

"The harbour sounds nice," I said, shooting him a slight smile. "It's been such a long time."

"Well, shall we go then?" he replied as he led the way.

The both of us reached the harbour not long after, it being only a stone's throw away from the Consulate. It was quiet, just like how it usually was this time of day. The morning market had closed, and all the night-time fishermen had all but gone back home to rest after a long night of backbreaking work.

The bright noon sun was high up in the sky, its piercing rays reflected on the glistening surface of the sea. A cool breeze blew in from the sea, sending the hems of my dress fluttering. I was wearing the dark blue dress again that day, the one with the pointed flat collar.

The squarks and caws of the seagulls echoed in the far distance against the backdrop of a few small trawlers in the horizon heading into the harbour. I shaded my eyes with my right palm, counting two of them, pointing to each one of them with my other hand slightly just to keep track. It was a habit of mine to point at things as I counted them.

"You remind me of Nanako," Kashiwagi-kun suddenly said, breaking the silence. "She loved to count the ships by the harbour."

"Oh you've got it wrong," I blurted, putting my hand down, somewhat embarrassed. "I don't usually count boats like that."

"I see," he replied, laughing in awkward manner. "It's been a long time since we've been in Hakodate huh? I really missed the harbour."

"Me too," I told him. "This place just holds so much memories."

"Yeah," he said, shoving his hands in his pockets.

We stood there like that for a few minutes, looking out at the sea beyond, taking in the sights and sounds we both missed dearly. After a while, the novelty of it worn off, and we decided to take a stroll down the harbour.

"You know," I said after a while to the young man walking beside me. "I just wanted to say that when I said that your earrings looked nice, I really meant it."

"You already did mention it just now, you know?" he replied. "But thanks anyway."

"I just wanted you to know. . ." I said, fidgeting with my fingers. "And I need you to know something else."

"W-Well, what is it?" Kashiwagi-kun blurted out, his cheeks slightly red.

"You know about my cousin?" I asked.

"The one that you live with?" he questioned back. "He's in nursing am I right?"

"We were talking about him just now, Sayaka-chan and I," I said. "And I thought I should share it with you too."

"What is it?" the young man said, his eyes gazing at his feet as we walked.

"Well, he's staying at my house this week," I told him. "But I think I told you that already."

"You did," he confirmed. "What else?"

"Well, a few days ago. . ." I began, a sudden uneasiness creeping onto me as to whether I should tell the young man what I was about to say. "A few days ago Shuuya-kun confessed to me."

Kashiwagi-kun was silent for a while, his gaze down, looking at his shoes.

"I see," he replied.

A wave of regret immediately sunk into my chest. Perhaps he was still harbouring feelings for me, and if he was, it was just so insensitive for me to be saying things like that.

"Look," I mumbled awkwardly. "I'm still really sorry about what happened back at the park, but I really hope you understand."

"S-sure," he replied, his cheeks slightly red. "I-I'm used to it."

"I haven't answered him yet, but I just wanted to tell you that I might not be single anymore," I said, fidgeting with my fingers. "So, I just don't want you to keep your hopes up."

"I see," he mumbled, obviously disappointed. "So you're going to accept him? Not like I'm trying to tell you what to do or anything, but I just hope you just make the decision you feel is best."

"Well, I'm just afraid," I confessed. "After what happened with Yukino, I'm not really too sure if this relationship thing is something that I'm up for."

"What do you mean?" he asked. "You and Nakayama had a great relationship."

"I just don't think I can do it all over again," I replied, brushing a strand of hair that was blown by the wind. "It's too painful. I-I don't know."

"Just give it some time," the young man said after a while. "It's painful, but it'll take time. And soon, bit by bit, you'll learn how to love again."

"Thanks," I muttered, hugging my chest. "That's really sweet of you to say."

"It's the least I could do," he replied. "Best of luck with that."

The both of us were silent for a while as we walked, the open bay with its glistening waves to our left.

"Could I ask you your honest opinion?" I asked the young man. "I really hope it isn't too much to ask."

"What do you need?" he responded, nodding slightly.

"I just wanted to know what you think. . ." I mumbled nervously. "About this whole fiasco with Shuuya-kun."

"What exactly do you want my opinion about?" he asked me.

"I just wanted to know, if you think I should accept him or not," I said. "I-I know it's insensitive of me to ask you, but I really have no idea what to do."

"Well. . ." he muttered. "That depends. I think that if you return his feelings and that he's a good person, I think that you should go for it."

"I guess I'll have to think about that," I replied. "Truthfully I've been avoiding the subject for the past couple of days."

"You can run away once or twice," he said, "But there'll be one day where you just have to stop running and face your problems yourself."

I could only nod my head in silence. Those words, they did hold some degree of truth to it. A part of me felt good hearing that, given that I could never have said such a thing to myself. But now that I had started to think about it for real, the truth had become much clearer to me.

I've always been packing my bags and fleeing the scene at the first signs of trouble. I don't know, I guess that was my way of 'solving' things, but truth be told, I did nothing more than stall whatever I had been running from. It was just a matter of time before it caught up to me again, and every single time I'd catch my breath and sprint as fast as I could.

"You're right," I muttered. "I'll give it some serious thought before answering him. And I'm really sorry if I'm hurting you if I do end up with him in the end."

"Don't worry about me, just worry about yourself," he chuckled awkwardly. "Besides, you can't break things that are already broken."

I don't know why he made such a reference but I giggled nonetheless to help ease the tension of the conversation.

"But you know," he said following that. "I'm just hoping for the best for you. You're a smart girl, I'm sure you'll make the right choices."

"Life is about choices after all," I muttered, looking off into the far horizon. "Like it or not we all have to make them."

"But there are still some things that are just beyond our control," he replied, joining me by my side.

"Yeah."

The both of us decided to head back to the tram station, seeing that it was nearing one in the afternoon.

"You know, people always remember the first time they meet someone special," I mumbled, hugging my arms close to my chest. "But I wonder if the last time holds as much significance to them."

"What do you mean by that?" the young man asked me.

"Every time you meet someone, don't you think it might as well be the very last time you'd ever see that person ever again?" I replied. "For all you know, the other person might not be there anymore, like their time is almost up."

The young man was silent for a while, before he finally spoke again.

"The last time I was with Nana-chan was when she died in my arms," he replied, tilting his chin up as he looked up at the faraway sky. "I don't think I'd ever forget that."

"On the day before he hung himself," I said, my arms still folded. "Yukino-kun and I took a long walk down the harbour. He hugged me tightly, and I asked him to promise me to never let me go."

A gust of wind blew down the street, and I swept a strand of hair that strayed into my face.

"But he didn't," I continued. "But that doesn't matter. What's done is done. All we have left are the nice memories of them."

Kashiwagi-kun nodded solemnly, his hands shoved in his pockets.

"And what is more important is that we must move on one day," he finally said after a while. "We have to remember that we can't just keep living clinging onto something that will never come back to us."

"Of course," I responded, looking up at the sky. "Of course."

  -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  

The sky was a dark, but the rays of fading evening light had were still lingering amidst the silhouettes of dark clouds. The setting sun was still barely hovering above the horizon, as if it refused to die. I had dressed up in a fine black yukata with floral motifs, and had done my hair into a low side ponytail. It was one of the very rare occasions I actually wore it like that, and I really began to doubt if it looked good on me.

My thoughts returned to the day before, when I finally mustered up the courage to ask Shuuya-kun to the festival with me.

The young man was sitting in the living room, cross-legged on the floor. He was dressed casually in a black T-shirt and sweatpants. The television was playing the weather forecast, but he seemed more interested in the phone he had in front of him. He didn't seem to notice my presence. I nervously approached him.

"Hey," I muttered, trying to announce my arrival.

The young man looked up, grunting in response.

"How can I help you?" he asked when he looked down again.

"I-I wanted to ask you something, if you don't mind," I said.

"What is it?" he answered, looking up with a slight frown on his brow.

"I was thinking if you were free tomorrow," I mumbled, fidgeting with my fingers. "I-I thought we could spend some time together and discuss. . . things."

Kashiwagi-kun had pointed out as we left the harbour that the next day the Port Festival was going to be held, which I had planned on skipping, since it was the same every year. But when he mentioned it, an idea popped into my head. I really thought it was a good idea.

"Why?" he asked, standing up, stretching his arms to his side. "But I'm free tomorrow though, if that's what you needed to know."

"I was thinking that we could go to the Port Festival together," I said, trying not to appear too nervous. "You know, it's a once-in-a-year thing. . ."

"Didn't you say you didn't want to go when my mother asked you?" he responded. "She wanted to pack my yukata for me, but you said no, so she left it at home."

"I've changed my mind," I told him. "And don't worry about the yukata, you can always borrow my brother's."

Shuuya-kun seemed a little surprised at my sudden change of heart to go to the festival, but he agreed nonetheless. I couldn't deny that I actually felt a slight tinge of excitement when that happened.

I looked at the clock hanging on the living room wall. For five minutes I had been waiting for Shuuya-kun to be done, but there was still no sign of him downstairs. My parents were not at home. They were planning to go to the festival with my younger brother that year, but something cropped up and my father had to be stationed in Muroran for a few days to help out with the company's ground dealings. With that, my brother too decided to stay at home.

But I didn't see it as any of those though. I saw it as the perfect opportunity to respond to the young man's confession the other, and open up to him, telling him about my true, real feelings. It was an appropriate time to be discussing such things after all, it was a festival.

"Sorry I took so long," I finally heard him say as he walked down the stairs. "I'm not sure if I can even fit in this."

I turned around to look at the young man. He was dressed in a dark brown yukata, lent to him by my brother. What he said about it not fitting was kind of true though. His shoulders were a little too broad for the fabric, and the yukata hugged onto his chest a little too tightly. The sleeves and cuff of the robe were a little too short for his limbs.

I couldn't help but turn away slightly, giggling.

"Yeah. . ." he mumbled, scratching the back of his head. "I kind of guessed so."

"N-No," I blurted out. "I'm not laughing at you, I just think you look rather. . . Rather. . ."

"Rather what?" the young man questioned, cocking his head slightly.

I averted my gaze from his glare, choosing to look at the ground instead.

"I-I think you look pretty cute," I finally managed to say, my cheeks getting warm.

"Um. . ." he responded after a while. "Thanks I guess."

The two of us made our way to the tram stop. I looked down at the asphalt ground for a moment, and it was then did I realise that Shuuya-kun was wearing sneakers. It's a funny contrast with his undersized yukata, but well, I didn't comment and kept my mouth shut. The summer breeze blew my sleeves slightly, but I didn't mind. It was nice, relaxing weather for a nice, relaxing evening.

We spent a few minutes waiting for the tram, and we managed to board one not long after, heading south. It was quite empty, so we didn't have trouble finding seats. Throughout the entire tram ride, I couldn't help but steal a few glances at the young man sitting beside me, in his attire that was too tight and short for his body. Shuuya-kun didn't seem to realise though, folding his arms as he looked down, apparently taking a nap.

He probably didn't want to go after all, and thinking about it that way made me feel rather guilty. It felt like he was just accompanying me because he just didn't want to refuse me. But I kept thoughts like that to myself and tried not to show my slight disappointment at myself, for I was scared he was probably going to feel bad about it too if he knew how I felt. It was the Port Festival after all, I should at least try to have some fun, and spend some time with Shuuya-kun.

Yet again deep in my heart I knew the main reason I called him out with me was to finally address and give him a reply to what he had said to me that Wednesday night after I had stabbed him with the house keys by accident. It wasn't at all a glamorous confession scene, what with him clad only in sweatpants and standing in my bathroom. But his feelings that made him admit what he thought of me were real, and I could tell. And that was what mattered more to me. At the very least, he wasn't pretentious.

We got off at the train station, and we both made our way down to the harbour. It wasn't a very long trek from the station, just a block or two away. Some of the smaller roads in the area were closed, stalls lining the sides and utility vehicles parked by the sidewalk.

"You've been to the festival here?" I asked him as he walked beside me. "It's kind of the main highlight."

"Well, probably ten years ago," he recalled. "I don't really remember, but I know I've probably went here once or twice, but a very long time ago."

"Oh yeah," I remembered. "You used to frequently come down here with your mother and sister."

"Pretty much," he responded. "Back when we had a car, but oh well."

We reached the main festival area by the sea not long afterwards. The evening crowd had gathered, by the harbour, walking through the thoroughfare between the rows of stalls. Some were decked out in traditional summer yukatas in a variety of colours, while others opted for a more casual look.

The stalls were like the ones at the festival the previous year, selling the usual types of festival foods and games. They were those things you'd normally expect at a festival: caramel apples on sticks, red bean-filled taiyaki and yakitori. The food and sights used to be what enticed me as a child, but not anymore. I guess the last few long, painful months had me pretty jaded. Two years ago, being the bashful seventeen-year old that he was, Yukino-kun finally managed to muster up his courage and asked me out to the festival. Two years later he was dead.

"Do you want to eat anything?" the young man asked me after a while.

I was too absorbed in my own thoughts that I didn't notice that he was talking to me at first, and only replied to him after a short, awkward pause.

"No, it's fine," I muttered. "I-I'm not hungry, so please go ahead."

The young man raised his right eyebrow.

"Well then," he said, folding his arms. "If you say so."

We walked down the crowded harbour for a while more, not really saying anything to each other. I lost my senses to the sights, sounds and smells around me, even though deep inside I told myself that I wasn't really interested in going to the festival in the first place.

The sounds of chatter filled the air, along with the laughter of children. The scents of a multitude of different foods wafted through the crowds. I felt the cool evening breeze blowing in from the bay, caressing my cheeks gently. My sleeves fluttered in the light wind.

The two of us walked past a few stalls selling food, and I couldn't help but steal a few glances to the side. I caught sight of a vendor selling yakisoba, just like the ones Shuuya-kun and I made together sometimes. I couldn't deny that I was actually getting hungry, the scent of soy and yakitori sauce exciting my stomach. I could really get something to eat, but since Shuuya-kun had already made an offer just now which I denied, I didn't want to ask him, in case he thought I was just playing around with him.

We walked past a stall selling okonomiyaki, the vendor pouring the batter onto the hotplate grill. I could hear the sizzling of the batter as it fried, and the smell of the sauce wafted past me. I looked at the okonomiyaki topped with all their savoury ingredients, decorated with the thick drizzling sauce.

My cousin, who was looking ahead turned to see what had caught my attention.

"Oh, it had been quite some time since I had one of these," he chuckled, walking towards the stall.

The vendor noticed the young man there and asked him what he wanted to order. Shuuya-kun nodded and pointed at the row of okonomiyaki labelled with squid, and ordered one. The man manning the stall tossed some shredded cabbage and cracked an egg over the already frying batter. I only stood beside my cousin as he waited for his okonomiyaki to finish cooking, silently wishing I hadn't rejected his offer earlier. But oh well, I could just wait to get home and eat. It was only going to be at most two hours out with him anyway.

"Well what toppings do you want?" Shuuya-kun suddenly turned and asked me.

"What?" I blurted out, rather startled that my thoughts were interrupted.

"I asked what toppings do you want," he repeated, frowning slightly.

When I didn't answer, the young man just turned around.

"Also, I'll have another ham and cheese please," he ordered.

The vendor nodded his head, grabbed another egg and a handful of vegetables, tossing them onto one of the frying okonomiyaki batter bases.

"Wh-What was that for?" I asked. "You don't have to."

"It's fine," he grunted. "I don't know what you wanted to eat so I just ordered one for you."

"No," I replied. "It's not that. I mean, I didn't ask so you didn't have to. . ."

"You haven't eaten anything today since lunch haven't you?" the young man said, folding his arms. "You certainly must be quite hungry."

I fell silent. What he said was true though, I was starving. But how would he know? Could he have been observing me all this while? Too know that he was so concerned for me. . . I couldn't find the words to reply to him.

"Well, if you want to ignore me, that's fine too," he replied, turning back to look at the okonomiyaki frying on the grill. "Whatever."

"N-No," I finally managed to blurt out. "I didn't mean it that way. I-I just was kind of surprised that you were so concerned for me."

"If I'm not concerned for the girl I like then there's something wrong there isn't it," he chuckled.

I could feel my cheeks getting warmer, and I lowered my gaze. In the corner of my eye, I saw that Shuuya-kun seemed to have noticed that what he said made me slightly uncomfortable, and that appeared to have made him feel the same. After all, regarding his confession, I still have not answered him with a proper, definite answer.

Plus, I haven't apologised for laughing at him. Sure, I didn't mean to make fun of him but it was just the way I tried to handle and cope with the entire situation. But of course, he could have taken it otherwise. I'm sure he took it otherwise. There was no other way but to get offended when someone you've just confessed your feelings to laughed in your face at your words. I was sure he thought that I thought he was a joke of some sort. I kind of feel bad for that.

Shuuya-kun paid for the two of us, and handed my okonomiyaki, folded and wrapped in paper to me. I accepted it with both hands with just a soft, mumbled word of thanks. He merely grunted in reply. I didn't offer to pay for my share or any of that sort, since it was going to just add up to the awkwardness to the already awkward situation.

With that, the young man and I went ahead with our rather seemingly aimless tour of the festival grounds. Honestly I didn't really know what to do, so I followed his lead mostly. He, on the other hand seemed like he didn't really know where he was headed either. Squid-topped okonomiyaki wrapped in paper in one hand, he occasionally brought it up to his lips for a bite. Seeing it as a cue, I did the same as well.

Honestly it tasted pretty good, the sauce adding the right amount of sweetness, a condiment to the soft batter. In the main body of the okonomiyaki itself were chopped pieces of salted ham and bits and pieces of molten cheese. It had been a pretty long time since I've had one of those.

"Do you want to go to a quieter part of the harbour?" I asked him. "It'll be nicer if I got to talk to you in a more private place."

"Well, sure," he mumbled with his mouth full. "Lead the way."

I brought Shuuya-kun down further south, where there was considerably less of a crowd. The lines of stalls had ended, and there were only a few other people there, walking towards and away from where the main festival area was.

"How is it?" the young man suddenly asked me, breaking the short silence between us.

"How's what?" I asked, slightly confused, having no idea what he was talking about.

The young man nodded towards the half-eaten okonomiyaki in my hands.

"Ah," I blurted out, finally realising what he was referring to. "It's pretty good. How about yours."

"It's fine," he replied.

The two of us stood in front of the glistening waters, illuminated by the lights from the harbour. The dark sky was devoid of any signs of sunlight now, the vast canvas a mixed shade of indigo and black. There were no stars to be seen.

"The harbour's a pretty nice place isn't it?" he said, initiating a conversation to save us from the clutches of awkwardness. "Especially on a night like this."

"It's a very nice place if you're looking for a quiet place to collect your thoughts," I replied. "The sea is really beautiful to look at."

"Yeah," he replied, stretching his arms in front of him. "It is."

"This is the place I last met Yukino-kun," I finally said after a while, staring into the far distance.

"Yukino-kun. . ." the young man muttered. "Was that your boyfriend's name?"

"It is," I replied, placing my hand on the ponytail I had tied to the side of my head. "It's a really nice name, don't you think?"

"Yeah," he responded. "Well, but I can see why he didn't like it though."

"He was that kind of guy who liked to act tough," I said, a slight smile curling up the edge of my lips as I searched for the horizon in the darkness of the far distance. "So of course, he didn't like the name one bit."

"Ah," my cousin said, leaning back. "That's such a pity."

"But he let me use that name though," I said, feeling a faint tinge of happiness as the memories seem to naturally come back to me after all these months. "Whenever I called him by that name he never seemed ashamed at all."

"I see," Shuuya-kun said as he chewed.

"You know," I said after a while, after I had finished eating my okonomiyaki. "I want you to know that two years ago Yukino-kun finally asked me out to the festival. We've hung out a few times, but that was the first time he ever asked me out for a date. And two years later here we are, the both of us."

"What are you getting to?" the young man questioned, one eyebrow raised.

"I'm just saying. . ." I muttered. "That two years ago. . .Yukino-kun and I were at the festival. And two years later. . . Here I am, with you."

"It's like. . ." he began. "It's almost like it's fate isn't it?"

I only nodded my head, my cheeks slightly warm as I looked into his deep brown eyes of his, peeking from behind the gaps of his fringe. My heart thumped in my chest, throbbing with every breath I took. I was getting slightly nervous, but I tried my best to hide it from him.

It was that moment as we gazed into each other's eyes when I heard loud explosions in the distance, followed by bright, colourful lights. Turning around towards the harbour, the both of us were greeted by a flashing display of fireworks illuminating the night sky. The crowd in the distance gawked in amazement. It was the highlight of the port festival after all, and most importantly something you wouldn't want to miss. But my purpose of going to the harbour that evening wasn't for the fireworks, nor was it for the festivities. It was for the young man standing beside me, clad in my brother's yukata which was a little too small for his muscular body, a little too tight for his broad shoulders.

"It's pretty isn't it?" he said. "Just like you."

I could only giggle shyly. The amazing display the very moment we looked into each other's eyes could be nothing less than the work of fate itself. As the sky lit up into a bright neon painting of red, green and blue, I reached out to my right, and held onto his large, warm palm. He turned his head slightly, and gave me a sleek, wry smile and I reciprocated with one of my own.

If this was fate, then with this woeful, wounded heart, I will wholeheartedly accept it without even a whimper of complaint.

"To answer your confession the other day. . ." I mumbled under the noise of the explosions. "Then yes, yes, I accept you."

"Really?" he said jokingly, teasing me.

"That's because I like you too," I said, finally finding the courage to mutter those words that I should have said a long time ago. "I like you, Shuuya-kun."

Without a word more, he scooped me in his strong grip, wrapping me with his muscular arms. MY ear was pressed gently against his chest. I could hear his heart throbbing I his ribcage, I could feel his chest moving up and down as he took each precious breath.

"I like you too, Ayano-chan," he whispered softly into my ear. "Even though you know that already."

I giggled as I snuggled against his warm, comforting body, the explosions of the fireworks in the far distance. Just for that brief moment, I forgot about everything. In that moment there was only Shuuya-kun and I. We finally admitted our feelings for one another. Bliss and happiness finally reached me again after what felt like an eternity of sorrow and mourning.

If this was fate, then I, with this woeful, wounded heart, wished that he would hold me like this forever, and never let me go.

^A~