[Harry]

When Marcel kissed Lucy I didn't move. I'm not sure how I didn't grab him by the neck and sent him to the moon or how I didn't use his face to clean the cement. The kiss probably lasted like two seconds because Lucy pushed him away but it was too late, I had seen it. I waited for Lucy to say something about it but she just opened the door and got into the house with Marcel.

The anger is flowing through me and in my mind I was almost killing him. This was another punch of the world against me. I have suffered all week and this whole night and now this happened.

I try to control myself and I need to remember that this is my fault; everything that happens now is my own fault. Now it's my turn to suffer and live in this constant torture of having Lucy away from me.

For a moment I could imagine the two together and it's the worst and most painful picture I've imagined this week. Lucy would be incredibly happy, Marcel would be good to her and he would never hurt her. They probably would argue but nothing serious. They would do many things together as study, play or go to competitions together. He is her best friend and she wouldn't have trouble communicating with him. I'm sure Lucy would marry him, Marcel would have a great job and he could give her everything she needed. Fuck Marcel the perfect cousin as the whole family thinks, and of course I'm the bad influence. It happens in the family and now it happens here. What if Lucy starts to like Marcel? I couldn’t take it.

I don't understand why she said nothing to Marcel. I wonder if she is trying to provoke me as she has done all night while she was with that group of people. I wanted her to be with me but I was replaced again. It's so painful to be replaced.

Now that Marcel knows what is happening he will probably talk shit about me. I already have Adam who must talk a lot of shit about me to Lucy. Then there are her friends. Damn, so many enemies. What if Lucy decides to reject me due to her friends' opinions?

All these people are an obstacle, a big black hole to me and I'm struggling but I'm beginning to doubt if I can catch Lucy. Maybe she won't be mine again and this is completely in vain but I don't want to give up. I don't want to stay away from Lucy, I know I don't deserve her love but I want to change the things.

I'm losing patience because Lucy is taking too long and I wonder what is happening. What if Marcel is talking to her? Maybe he is convinced her that I am a bad choice and mentioning every defect about me.

I heard the door and I looked up. Lucy is walking with her eyes on the floor. What is she thinking? Is she thinking about Marcel or about me?

"Why didn't you say anything about it?" I asked when she was in front of me.

"About what?"

"About Marcel, he just kissed you in front of me,” I furrowed my eyebrows.

"It was a mistake," she murmured without looking at me.

"What are you thinking? Do you like Marcel? "

"What? No, no. "

"He stole a kiss and it seems that you don't care. What if I steal you a kiss? You will probably be very upset. "

"It's different," she opened the door. "When it comes to us is very different."

Lucy climbed into the car and I rushed and did the same.

"Please, I just hope you're not provoking me," I said very frustrated.

"Why would I do that?" She frowned.

"You have effect on me. I really wanted you to stay with me, we could have talked but you replaced me, you did it so easily, Lucy,” I replied irritated and hurt.

"I didn't replace you I have the right to choose."

"I hate that," I said while driving.

"What do you hate?"  She asked looking at window.

"I hate that because I want you with me but we are far away, Lucy."

"I want to trust you—"

"But I don't see you make the effort, I'm suffering too—"

"And what about me?" She inquired upset. "I suffered and didn't go to you and I didn't complain about how everything was between us,” she said and looked at me angrily. I gulped.

"It’s just that...that I don't have a lot of patience, it's so hard for me."

"It's difficult for me too," she sighed. "You were being so sweet, please, don't become an idiot."

"Sorry it's just that I miss everything, I miss the old days, I used to feel so good."

Remember how we used to be just brings a lot of nostalgia and is a powerful feeling. I'm craving and missing memories. I miss her old attitude when she was so comfortable with me, and now it seems like we repel each other.

"Can I trust you?" Lucy spoke quietly and we're almost at her house.

"Yes, you can. I'm not playing, Lucy. You're all I want, just give me a chance," I said and looked at her a couple of times while driving.

"I made ​​you feel good?" I nodded in response. "Do you miss feeling that way?"

"Of course," I answered and parked the car.

Lucy looked at her hands and I waited for an answer in the dark.

"You-you don't like me, you just miss to feeling that way."

WHAT THE HELL?

"What? No. I miss you, Lucy. "

"No. Perhaps you felt so sorry and you feel so lonely now that you can't play with me and because things were not working with Emily that the idea of me to you seems to be correct. "

"No, of course not, Lucy."

"That would explain everything. It's been so long and suddenly you show up out of nowhere and tell me you are in love with me. It doesn't seem rational, doesn't make sense," she shook her head.

"Lucy, I told you I was stupid. I was so slow and I'm really sorry but I've wanted you all along. "

"I don't know," she shook her head and opened the door. She got out of the car and I followed her. "Leave me alone."

"Can we talk?" I tried to grab her hand and she avoided my touch.

"No, I don't want—"

"You never want, then how do you expect us to make the things work?"

"Maybe I don't want to," she spoke softly and that hurt like hell.

"I just told you I miss you and you said the same thing and now look at us, didn't mean anything to you?" I asked feeling desperate for her answer. "For me it did, it meant a lot to me, you mean so much to me," I said when she didn’t answer. I need to convince her, we could be real.

She looked at me through her glasses, she pursed her lips and lowered her head to her shoes.

"Yes, it-it did...but I don't know, I'm very confused," she shrugged and hugged herself.

She slid a hand through her cheek and I was waiting for her to cry but she doesn't. I know I shouldn't want it but I want to see Lucy showing her feelings, I want to know if she's sad the way I am about this entire situation. I wait and wait, but Lucy doesn't cry, she just looks lost and she is frowning.

"I want to be alone," she muttered and stepped back.

"You always want to be alone, let me stay with you, Lucy," I blurted out the words and is an attempt in vain because I know the answer.

"No, I don't want to.”

"It wasn't so bad to spend time together, you see?" I took a step toward her but Lucinda quickly stepped back. "Spend a little more time with you is all I want. We were making a progress and Marcel ruined it and you changed so quickly. Do you like Marcel? This is his entire fault. "

"What? No, of course not. He's just my friend, why do you keep mention him? "

"Because he is a threat, and you know that he is far better than me for you, Lucy."

She stared at me and crossed her arms. Lucinda put her hand on one of her braids and let out a heavy sigh.

“ Thanks for bringing me home, Harry."

She turned around and walked towards her house. She closed the door and I was left standing there in the middle of the night.  Suddenly everything is cold, empty and hostile and I'm drowning in it.

My steps led me to my car, I got in and rested my hands on the steering wheel. I looked at Lucy's house and then to my hands.

Not sure if that was a goodbye but the simple idea is destructive and I feel completely devastated. Did I just lose Lucy?

+

[Lucy]

Marcel remembers what he did and that's why today he hasn't talked to me. It was so unexpected, I thought Harry would kill Marcel but he didn't move from his place.

So basically I said goodbye to Harry and this could not be worse. I'm not regretting what I said but it was so difficult for me. When he said he wanted to stay with me I almost died right there. I just wanted to erase everything and say yes. I would like to bury my face in his chest and enjoy his characteristic smell. Oh and of course get lost in his green eyes.

I'm so sad, confused and defeated that I decide to go to Megan, the school counselor. I tried not to cry but when I got to her office I was full of tears.

"Oh my God!" Is the first thing she says to me. "Come, sit!"

"I'm-I'm sorry," I stammered and sat down. "I feel terrible," I said and began to cry harder.

"What did he do now? I hate men," she shook her head and sat down.

"I am ve-very confused. I'm not sure if he wants me or feels sorry for me and that makes him believe that he is in love with me. "

"Oh, holy shit, I understand," she nodded and pulled out her pink folder.

"He sent me messages and did this," I pulled out my phone and showed it the picture of the sea of petals.

"Kill me, kill me," Megan muttered.I showed her the messages and Megan nodded. "He's using capital letters, I think he was screaming at you in that message.Guys who write with a capital letter are desperate, the good part is that you can play with them when they are in that state. "

"I don't want to do that," I replied confused by her statement.

"Buuh!," she pouted. "This guy is so conflicted I never expected him to do this kind of thing. I’m impressed."

"Me-me neither and that confuses me even more because he has taken me off guard all these occasions."

Megan gave me a tissue. I left my glasses on her desk and wiped my tears.

"This is crazy, the most romantic thing a boy has done for me is give me a t-shirt of my favorite band," I looked at her surprised and she nodded. "I told you I went out with a bunch of jerks."

"I know I should talk about this with my friends but I-I don't want to and I don't even know why I came here," I confessed and wiped more tears.

"Hey, you came to the right place!" Megan smiled. "So now you're crying and you are very confused, what are you gonna do?"

"I'm afraid of the truth, I'm afraid to love him again. What if things go wrong? We could end up very hurt. "

"Yes, you could save all that and you could get some revenge."

"I don't like revenge," I shook my head and rolled his eyes Megan.

"Today came a girl who wanted revenge I thought it might help you too," Megan sighed and closed her folder. "Putting something spicy in the food never fails," she smiled to herself.

"Can you give me an advice? What-what would you do in my position? "I stammered

"That's a good question. Hm, I would speak with him. The most important thing among people is communication, is something elemental. You can't keep running away because it doesn't take you anywhere. The second thing I would do is keep myself busy, work or help my classmates as you do."

"I'm-I'm not very good communicating."

"You can't be so bad if that guy is crazy about you. I don't think you've conquered him with your silence, do you? " I shook my head and Megan smiled.

"Don't rush your thoughts and listen to what he has to say, okay?"

"Okay."

"Oh and most importantly, always give space, sometimes it's very overwhelming everything you need is space."

"Okay," I nodded and wiped the remaining tears.

"Do you really like this boy?" Megan gave me a confused look.

I bit my lower lip and nodded. I couldn't help but crying again.

"Oh my God, sorry, sorry!" She grabs more tissues and gives them to me. "Don't cry."

I wiped my tears and Megan waited until I managed to calm myself.

"Now that you've stopped crying we could do a test that I have in this seventeen magazine, it would be fun," Megan said as she pulled the magazine out of her drawer.

I guess doing that would distract me a little. I wiped my nose and drank water from the bottle that was in my backpack.

"Okay, Megan."

+

I managed to tell the girls what happened the weekend without crying, I also spoke about the problem with Marcel. Both were freaking out about the news. Cassie said I was an animal and a magnet for cousins ​​and Mandy told me to think very well about Harry and that maybe I was exaggerating because I was scared about us and the idea of Harry and his feelings. Mandy gives good advice and Cassie...is just Cassie with her funny comment or opinions out of place.

I ate my lunch quickly and then grabbed my stuff, I had to go to the library.

I got up and Cassie put her hand on mine.

"Oh my goodness. Look at that, "Cassie said, and I followed the course of her gaze.

My eyes widened at the sight of Louis. The blue-eyed boy was sitting but on his hands he held a big paper that said: Forgive Harry.

I flushed completely, I quickly inspected the table and Harry was not there. I walked over to their table and extended my hand to him.

"Tomlinson, gi-give me the paper."

"Forgive Harry, forgive Harry!" He squealed, shaking the paper and I snatched it. The four boys giggled, I think they are high.

"Forgive Harry, forgive Harry, forgive Harry!" The four said in unison and I stepped back embarrassed.

I started walking fast and looking down. I went to the library, Marcel and I should order the books today but when I get to the library he is not there. I'm disappointed but I need to understand him.

I opened the paper that Louis wrote and I rolled my eyes with a smile. That was so childish but it was funny. I put the paper in my backpack, I waved at the librarian and grabbed a couple of books. I ordered the first books and I slowly walked back to the table where the others were.

I don't understand what Marcel sees in me. I've always been like a boy with him, we talked about everything and we fight with our swords. We have never talked about feelings because we have zero experience in love. We have always been at the same level and he has always been like my second brother.

I can't be with him because he is my best friend and I never want to ruin our friendship. Also it would be very wicked of me to be with him when I was with his cousin.

I grab my cell as soon as starts ringing in the middle of the library. I got a message from Marcel and I know that nothing good will come of this.

From: Marcel.

Sorry I didn't go today. I'm sorry for what I did but I'm mad at you. You can't be with Harry, he doesn't deserve you.

It's so hard when your friends are against it. Marcel's opinion is important but the decision is mine. I wonder if he will stop talking to me if I'm with Harry, if I try something with him. Would he be able to do that? No, Marcel would not be able to cut our friendship for that.

"The Lucy specimen, of the female gender and the scientific name of Lucis, inhabits most of her time in the library," I turned around when I listen Eric's narration.

"Hi to you too," I said reluctantly and started walking.

"Lucy lives in common areas like the library, classroom or home. This animal doesn't hunt, instead she is chased by the male, aka, Harry Styles. "

"Eric!" I growled angrily and he laughed. "You're an idiot."

"I know, I know."

I grabbed some books and he did the same. I paused for a few seconds with my eyes on him.

"I want to help," he said and I followed him when he started walking. "You look thoughtful, squirrel, what is going on?"

"Nothing new," I muttered.

We walked into a hallway and sat on the floor to organize the books.

"The Lucy specimen is characterized by her personality, she's so quiet, this animal most of the time goes unnoticed almost like a chameleon," Eric told with a smile. "This specimen is characterized by a high IQ, plus the female uses braid, possibly for the ritual of mating or coitus with the male, aka, Harry Styles."

"Could you stop?" I growled and he chuckled. "Besides I don't do intercourse or mating."

"The Lucy specimen has no sexual appetite, almost zero, is an innocent and friendly animal, which might explain the attraction that the male, aka, Harry Styles feels for Lucy."

"Eric, what's wrong with you?" I snapped out of patience and he laughed again.

"She never gets mad but when she does she uses her biggest weapon," he spoke and I threw a book at him annoyed. "... Throwing books," Eric said, and gave me the book back. "I was bored and I saw you, I had to bother you a bit."

"I'm not in the mood," I sighed and returned some books to their places.

"Are you on your period?" He asked and I didn’t answer.

We put everything in its place and we went for more. 

"How don't you get bored? This is horrible," Eric complained as we enter to another hallway.

"Sometimes I read, here is very quiet and not many people come," I shrugged. "I like it."

"I was here because I was trying to study but I saw you and I couldn't concentrate, baby," Eric winked at me. 

I ignored his comment and I sat on the floor.

"Yes, Lucy, I honestly couldn't control myself when I saw you with all those books and looking at the floor as usual. I told you that your specimen attracted males," Eric spoke and I think he's trying to make me laugh or waiting for an answer but I keep myself busy with the books.

"Lucy, there you are," I heard Billy's voice and my eyes met the boy. "Hope I'm not interrupting something."

"We were in the middle of a date," Eric said seriously and Billy looked at me to confirm Eric's statement.

"He's lying, what's up, Billy?"

"I have something, this is for you," he stretched a white envelope towards me and I grabbed it.

I read Harry's name on the envelope and then I look up at the boy.

"Billy, Cassie was right, you are a spy."

"A spy?" Eric asked confused.

"Harry's spy."

"I'm not his spy, I helped him with this kind of thing," Billy shrugged.

"What did I miss?" Eric sat closer to me and grabbed the envelope. "Holy shit," Eric starts to laugh.

"Hope you like it. I really think that Harry has good intentions, "Billy said before getting up and leaving.

"What did I miss? Was I right?"

"Yes, you were right," I sighed and grabbed the white envelope. "He's in love with me, or that's what he wants me to believe."

"He likes you, I'm sure about that. Are you going to open it or what?"

"Don't laugh and don't make sarcastic comments, Eric."

"I will try."

I took a deep breath and opened the envelope, inside there was a paper.

"Let me read, let me read," Eric rested his chin on my shoulder.

I hope is not a goodbye Lucy. I found this and it reminded me of you.

Love is not all: it is not meat nor drink
Nor slumber nor a roof against the rain; 
Nor yet a floating spar to men that sink 
And rise and sink and rise and sink again; 
Love can not fill the thickened lung with breath, 
Nor clean the blood, nor set the fractured bone; 
Yet many a man is making friends with death 
Even as I speak, for lack of love alone. 
It well may be that in a difficult hour, 
Pinned down by pain and moaning for release, 
Or nagged by want past resolution's power, 
I might be driven to sell your love for peace, 
Or trade the memory of this night for food. 
It well may be. I do not think I would. 

-

I covered my mouth with my hands and Eric looked at me.

"This is...really sweet,"I said impressed.

"So, what the poem says is that love can cure or be many things but still he wouldn't change your love."

"Yes..." I replied in shock.

"Lucy, this is super gay. What did you do to Styles? "The blonde smiled. "He really likes you, personality is needed to send this."

"It's not gay, it's very sweet and real."

"Have you spoken to him?" I shook my head. "Are you running away?"

"Not exactly."

"You and your communication problems. I cannot believe he has that little boy Billy as his slave. Hey, does he still follow you? I think he tends to be a bit psychopath when it comes to you. If Billy shares all his classes with you then Harry must know where you are all the time, he probably knows you're with me right now. "

"You think?"

"I was his friend, believe me. If Harry comes here because I'm here with you I'll laugh a lot and I won't regret it, Lucy. "

"Stop it," I whispered and read the poem again.

It is simple, sweet and romantic. I am so in love with this new Harry, I never thought he would do this. Where did he find this?

"It shouldn't even be a 'maybe' but you should talk to him. You know that an opportunity doesn't mean you two have to act like a couple again and forget everything but talk and share and that stuff. I cannot believe I said that, that worm deserves the worst. "

"Harry is not a worm, he's cute, he has cute eyes and cute tattoos," I said and place the poem against my chest.

"Oh God, I'm going to throw up," Eric rolled his eyes.

We heard someone cough loudly, almost exaggerated, and we look at the entrance of the hall. Harry was there with a worried expression but also he looked upset, I guess that is the fact that Eric and I are sitting together.

I was going to say something but Eric started laughing. It was Billy, Billy told Harry where I was. Eric is right, Harry even watches me here at school.

I hope you like it, lots of love xx