1- I hate the chapter. Hope you guys like it, ily bye.

2- Thanks for read it means the world to me.

+   +  +  +      LUCY

Steal and give a kiss are two very opposite things about perspective and what you want.

 I never wanted to kiss Ryan and I never thought that now I would be kissing Harry. And I do this because I want to.

I don't know how to kiss so I tried it as I have seen in the movies and as I saw in that video.

 I move my lips to the rhythm of his lips. Should I open my mouth? What do I do? Where I put my hands? I don't know what to do, and as always, I'm about to cry.

"Don't be shy." Harry whispers, separating our lips a few inches.

He pressed his warm, full lips against mine and I feel that this time he opens his mouth. That's the signal. I imitated him and I feel his tongue. Oh my god.

I can't believe I'm doing this, all the germs and saliva...but he is kissing me in such a sweet way that the thought fades from my mind.

I will have time to disinfect my mouth after or something.

I never thought I would give my first kiss this year and my second kiss; this is so unexpected, new and scary. I never thought that Ryan or Harry would kiss me.

Both are so different and of course I prefer Harry...because I want this and that terrifies me. So this is how you feel to be attracted to someone? It is a strange and unstable feeling for me. Does he feel the same?

Harry broke the kiss and rested his forehead against mine. What? But it was so fast! I want more, that was...amazing! Beyond amazing to be honest. Harry is the last person I would imagine in this situation with me here in the tea house.

"Unfortunately I'm the second kiss." Harry whispers and I feel chills.

Unfortunately...

I laughed, I don't know what to say. Harry pulled away from me and we both looked at each other but something changes, something happens. Seeing his face I know immediately that this time is an awkward silence.

Should I say something? Something like "thank you for kiss me"? I better keep quiet that would be stupid.

"Let's get out of here?" Harry asked, pointing at the door.

"Ahm, ok-okay." I accepted and we both left the tea house.

As soon as we left I feel that the atmosphere has changed between us. How is that possible? Is it my fault? Maybe he didn't like the kiss, oh my god, this is so embarrassing!

Although right now I shouldn't be worried about it, I should be worried for the fact that he kissed me. I mean, what are his intentions? Why he did this?

And with those two questions reality hits me hard. He is playing with me. That must be the answer. Why else would? Why he would kiss me when he can kiss and have sex with the girl he wants?

Urg, I'm so naive and stupid. I felt that the kiss was real, was slow and delicate...but I was wrong, I guess Harry is a good actor.

I kissed him because I like him, he kissed me and I am just another one.  This feeling sucks, is worse than my stolen kiss or worse than my mother screaming at me.

"Can I eat that chocolate cake?" Harry pointed to my plate on the table that is still intact.

"Sure." I nodded.

I literally want to hit myself. For a moment, just for a second I forgot who he is. How could I be so stupid?

Sure he is playing, he would never like me. We are complete opposites psychologically and physically, because he is very handsome for someone as ugly as me.

Maybe...I should say something... maybe ask about the kiss.

No, maybe not. This is an impulsive reaction. I'll have time to think and discuss about everything that happened today and then talk to Harry I guess. If I ask something now I could ruin the moment, ruin my second kiss.

"Lucy, are you listening?" Harry's voice pulls me out from my thoughts.

"No, sorry." I shook my head. "What did you say?"

"I'm sorry for kiss you, I don't know what  I was thinking, it wasn't my intention." He says.

My heart stopped for a few seconds. I can't believe he said that. He ruined everything. He doesn't like me. Can I cry? I want to, I need to, but I can't cry in front of him. I already cried a lot because of my mother.

"Oh, um, no prob-problem." I shrugged my shoulders. "I also didn't know what I was thinking." I lied to him and I lied to myself.

"Good." That's all he said before dropping a piece of cake to his mouth. There is no expression on his face; there is not a single drop of emotion.

"Oh, hello again Harry." I heard the voice of Madison behind me.

I turned to her and gasped. Madison is wearing a skirt, too short to be honest, looks like underwear and she is using a tank top that shows her perfect stomach.

I swallowed looking at her image. I could never compete with her. I look like a potato sack and she looks stunning. She is the kind of person for Harry. 

"Um, hi." Harry said blankly.

"What are you two doing?" She asks as she walks to the table and sits on it.

"Nothing." Harry and I say in unison.

"Oh, so fun." Madison says sarcastically. "Hey Harry, I was wondering if you'd like to go out, let's drink a few beers." Madison offers while she is playing with a lock of her hair.

Wait, what's happening? She is flirting with him? I can't believe it. I know Harry is nothing to me but...she doesn't respect anyone.

"No, thanks." He answered looking at his plate. "I have better things to do." Madison frowns and I smile.

"The cake was delicious." Harry said patting his stomach. "I have to go, see you Lucy." Harry said approaching me, he planted a kiss on my forehead and left, he didn't even say goodbye to Madison.

Maybe I should be happy because he didn't pay attention to my stepsister but I only feel sadness.

"You slept with him?" Madison asked. Her words take me off guard. Why did she ask that?

"No, of course not." I said offended.

"This must be a fucking joke." Madison growled.

"Why? What do you mean?" I asked, not understanding her words.

"I don't understand. Why he would spend time with you?" She asks as she looks at me from head to feet.

I wonder the same thing.

"Because...beca-because I'm nice." I managed to say. I know it's a stupid and incoherent answer. Madison burst out laughing at my words.

"You're so pathetic." Madison says.

I'm not mad at her because I know I'm pathetic but at least Harry cares what I say or something like that. She was flirting with him and Harry even cared.

"At least he talks to me." I whispered.

"What?" Madison screamed. "But who the fuck you think you are?" My stepsister walks toward me and pushes me. "I don't care if Harry Styles talks to me or not, I don't waste my time with stupid people." She spits and then leaves the kitchen. "Next time I'll break those stupid glasses!" She screams as she climbs the stairs.

I guess I deserved that she pushed me, I started and I shouldn't say that. What is happening to me? That comment wasn't nice, I can understand why she was furious.

The problem is that I never say that sort of thing.

I sighed as I left the kitchen. I went to my room and I threw myself on my bed. Can I go back to the start?

It all started with a miserable Lucy arguing with her mother and this ended with a miserable Lucy lying on her bed. I feel used, rejected like a tissue or a toy. He kissed me and then he regrets everything. How am I supposed to feel? Right now I want to hit myself for being so naive.

It was special while it lasted.

I covered my face with a pillow and I screamed, I screamed until my throat hurt.

There are so many thoughts in my head right now. What should I do? Ignore or ask Harry about the kiss? I'm confused, confused by his actions and by my own thoughts. I want to understand why he kissed me but first I must understand myself.

This is so hard. This thing called "love" or whatever. Wait, what? Is that what I'm feeling?

Love...

I shudder to think of the word. "Oh no..." I whispered, pressing the pillow against my face.

I can’t feel that.

+++++   HARRY.

"Shit, shit, shit." I cursed before I drink a sip from my glass. I let the vodka burn my throat and travel inside me.

I just kissed Lucy. I should be happy because it brings me one step closer to fulfilling the Taylor fucking deal but I don't feel that. I feel angry at myself. Rage for agreeing to this, for going to her house and for kiss her.

The problem wasn't the kiss, the problem was that I liked and I honestly don't know the reason why. It's better to stay like this, it's better to leave things hidden inside me.

"Shit!" I screamed and I threw the glass against the wall.

I ran a hand through my hair and I tried to calm down. I'm not in the mood and my mind is very noisy. Right now I need to hit something or someone, it's the only way to let it all go.

"But what the fuck Harry!?" Louis screams, entering the kitchen.

"It's not your fucking problem!" I yelled, getting up.

"Why are you so angry?"

"And now you care?" I growled and I walked toward the door.

"What the fuck? Are you on your period or something? "He grunted following me.

I didn't answer, I opened the door and I slammed it.

This is my moment of misunderstanding, I don't talk to anyone because no one could understand and I don't want them to understand.

I'm alone and I don't want company.  I must spend the rest of the afternoon doing something, anything to distract me from all this shit about Lucy.

I guess the best I can do now is going to a bar and fuck some stupid girl.

++

++++

I opened the door of the cafe and I walked to the table where my friends are.

The hangover is killing me. Why I drank so much yesterday? "Ugh." I groaned and shook my head.

"Where were you yesterday?" Louis complained.

"Shut up." I groaned and I collapsed in a chair next to Niall.

"What happened Harry? Why are you not in a good mood? "Niall asks before taking a bite of his burger.

"None of your damn business." I complained carrying a hand to my forehead.

"He is with hangover," Liam says. "Harry you're fucked."

"And? that doesn't kill anyone."

"Poor liver." Liam shakes his head.

"Shut up or I'll kick your ass Payne."

"You are unbearable Harry, what the fuck happened? Any problems with that stupid nerd?" Zayn groaned.

"No, none." I shook my head. "Yesterday I kissed her." Holy fuck, I didn't mean to say that!

"What!" Niall and Liam almost scream.

"That's my Harry!" Louis pats my back. "That's a big step, now you have to stay like the flirt boy that you are and you are going to have her at your feet."

"And how was it?" Zayn laughs. "It must be the worst kiss ever. I'd rather die than kiss her. "Zayn outlines a grimace.

I don't like what he is saying, he better shut up.

"I mean, she's so...ugh, disgusting, makes me want to throw up." Zayn laughed and I squeezed my fists. "You know what she needs? A good penis—"

"Shut the fuck up!" I yelled slamming my fist on the table.

I think I screamed very loud because the boys and also the entire cafeteria shut their mouth. I'm the center of attention, just what I need, I hate curious people.

"What the fuck are you looking at?" I screamed looking around me and, of course, there is no answer.

I don't want to stay here and sit down and listen to stupid Zayn. I better be going. I walk quickly towards the exit of the cafeteria and I head for my car.

I light a cigarette as I low the driver's window.

This is bullshit, this is such a bad day. Hangover, Zayn and his stupid words. How dare he say that about Lucy? He is a fucking idiot, I was about to break his jaw right there. He doesn't know Lucy, she is very sweet and beautiful...yes, she is, in her own way she is beautiful.

The kiss wasn't bad at all, it was better than I expected. It was slow and even...romantic? I guess I'm a good actor. I had to kiss her that way and it was fine, I've never kissed anyone like that. I'm always rude and aggressive but with Lucy that simply disappears.

I check the time on my phone; my next class is with Lucy.

I grabbed a notebook out of my bag and closed the door. I walk through the halls and I head straight to the classroom. Let's end this shit and I hope the day end soon.

I walk into the room and I can feel some eyes on me but I really don't give a shit. My eyes stopped on Lucy, she's looking at me with her ​​brown eyes wide and confused. Lucy put her glasses and her cheeks blush with a crimson color.

I've thought about her since yesterday and today but I can't afford to do that, I can't let her stay in my thoughts. Indirectly I feel that she is taking the control over me and I hate that.

She raises her hand in greeting as she smiles shyly. Shit. She is sitting alone and I suppose that she wants me to sit with her. I should do it but I will not.

I don't smile or wave at her in response. I sit next to a girl and I throw my book on the table. I didn't turn to look at her again, but I know that her smile faded from her face.

I shouldn't do this because the idea is to conquer her but I just can't deal with this. I can't control my actions, I'm ruining everything. I don't know how but I hope she forgive me, I'll find the way.

My mind floats into the kiss while the teacher explains some shit I can't understand. I don't know why I keep thinking that, it was insignificant. I'm still angry at the world and with myself, is my mind betraying me or what?

I need to empty my mind and the only way is to go out drinking until forget my name. It is the best way to solve everything.

I am the first to leave when the class ends, finally out of this hell. I light a cigarette while I walk through the parking lot.

I smoke in my car while I watch several students talk in groups or leave in their cars.

A group of girls walks in front of my car, sexy girls, good tits and nice ass. One of them looks at me and winks. I smile and I divert my eyes from her.

I'm about to start the engine when I stop my eyes on Lucy. She walks in front of my car without looking at me, her eyes are glued to her feet while she is walking down to the bus stop. Where is Cassie? Lucy always goes with Cassie. I don't like the idea to see her alone.

Before I can make a decision I'm already out of my car and walking towards Lucy. I'll just leave her at home, nothing more.

"Hey, Lucinda." I called her and she stopped. Lucy turns to me and looks at me blankly. "Want me to take you home?" I asked, throwing my hands into my pockets.

Lucy frowns and she starts walking, completely ignoring me. What the fuck? I hate when people ignore me, I hate when I don't get an answer.

I'm already pissed off, I don't need any shit.

"I'm talking to you!" I almost yelled, grabbing her arm.

"Get off me!" She screams mad while she loses my grip.

Did she just yell? I can't believe Lucy is always calm but now she looks like a beast. She never gets angry and she yelled at me one time, I must admit I like when she is upset.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" I growled.

"Leave me alone!" She says angry and she turns to leave. I will not let her go so quickly.

 I grab her arm and violently I turn her towards me.

"Don't touch me!" She said trying to loosen my grip. Her eyes meet mine and they have lost strength, they no longer look so angry but her eyes are watery. That was bipolar, what is her problem?

"Calm down." I growled and I released her arm.

"I don't want to talk to you..." She said in a lower tone. "I'm not a to-toy, so leave me alone. Don't waste your time with me beca-because I will not waste my time with yo-you."With every word her voice becomes weaker and weaker. "I don't care about you Harry and you certainly don't care about me." She whispers looking at me.

I don't know what to say, somehow her words hit me. Why is she saying that? Is she mad? We were fine yesterday. If it is because I didn't sit with her I will punch someone because that is a stupid reason.

Lucy looks away and starts walking in the opposite direction to mine.

Shit, shit. I ruin everything. Again. I think it's a talent.

"All right," I shouted. "I don't give a shit about you!" I yelled angrily as I watch Lucy walking away.

The problem is that I was lying. I care about her more than I expected.

I can't let her go but I’m not going to chase her. I'm not like that. I guess pride wins this time.