Mario: Michael locked himself in the bathroom and we don't know how to get him out. 

Austin: Just tell him I said something.

Ritchie: Like what?

Austin: Anything factually incorrect.

-five minutes later-

Michael: I'm sorry, Austin, the sky is blue because it's reflecting the ocean?

--O--o--O--

Mitch: The answer to keeping your new hoodie? Buy your boyfriend the exact. Same. One. 

Inmo: You foolish mortal. Now I'll have two blue hoodies. 

--O--o--O--

Austin, with his leg stuck in a chair: Now you may be asking, "How did you do this to yourself, Austin?"

Austin, trying to get unstuck: Well kids, Austin has no clue either. 

--O--o--O--

Brandeen: Some people are like slinkies

Bryan: Explain. 

Brandeen: Not really good for much but makes you crack a smile when you push it down the stairs. 

Bryan: Please don't push Daveed down the stairs. 

Brandeen: You can't stop me. 

--O--o--O--

Colin: I turned out perfectly fine. 

Ritchie: Just this morning you thought a ghost made your toast.

Colin: I DIDN'T PUT THE BREAD IN! YOU DIDN'T PUT THE BREAD IN!

Inmo: *put the bread in while under his invisibility cloak*

--O--o--O--

Kaykrae, at the beginning of the series: I'm not doing too well

Kaykrae: I have this headache that comes and goes

Xylo: *walks into the room*

Kaykrae: Oh look, there it is again. 

--O--o--O--

Mario: So what's it like being Jakey's brother?

Mitch: Once I asked him for a glass of water while he was mad at me and he brought me a glass of ice and said "wait"

--O--o--O--

Michael: No, but listen, the meme makes no sense. 

Austin: OMG Michael

Mario: Not again. 

Michael: Moths aren't attracted to lamps, they are CONFUSED by them! They usually fly at an angle relative to light such as the moon, and the lamps throw them off!

Ritchie: Let them have their FUN!

--O--o--O--

Seekah: Are you in love with Jakey?

Brandeen: *sweats* ...no

Seekah: Then why do you draw "B+J" everywhere

Brandeen: It stands for Bitterness and Jealousy

--O--o--O--

Bri, at the beginning of the series: I have feelings for you

Austin: You do?

Bri: Yes, I feel you're a little annoying

--O--o--O--

Mitch: Why don't you have a boyfriend?

Inmo: I have overprotective brothers. Why don't you have a boyfriend?

Mitch: You have overprotective brothers. 

--O--o--O--

Mitch: You think you can betray us, threaten our lives, and then just come back?!

Brandeen: Would you be surprised if I said yes?

--O--o--O--

Bryan: I'm gay

Bri: Water's wet. Michael's smart. Austin is adorable. 

Bryan: What?

Bri: Sorry, I thought we were listing obvious things. 

Austin: Did you say I'm adorable?

--O--o--O--

Colin: I'm quick at math. 

Seekah: Okay, what's 38 times 76

Colin: 24

Seekah: That's not even close. 

Colin: But it was quick.