Everything is just starting to blur together.

From going to work at Vante's to spending every other minute in your apartment, it's becoming a routine to pretend like you and everyone else is okay even when you're so far from it.

It's been over a week since Jungkook left. You haven't seen him at all, and as far as you know, neither have the three idiots crashing at your place.

They're just worried. That's all, but it's really starting to impede in your personal life.

For one, Namjoon being around all the time is making you all the more confused. Secondly, even if you wanted to figure out your feelings, you couldn't really do much with your brother nearby. Lastly, Taehyung has no filter and constantly hits on Yoongi every chance he gets.

Well, that's when he's not annoying you.

Like now, as you sit behind the reception desk, Taehyung is standing behind you to keep a close watch.

"What about now?" He asks, his voice at your ear.

You jump slightly at the proximity.

When Namjoon suggested at least one of them always had to be with you, you're pretty sure that didn't mean hovering over you and breathing down your neck all the damn time.

"Still fucking no, Tae." You respond in an irksome tone.

"Language," Taehyung reprimanded. "We're at work, so you need to address me as Mr. Kim."

Glowering, you glimpse over your shoulder and give Taehyung a good hard look. "Exactly, so get out of my personal space. The hosts are starting to stare."

He flicks his gaze upward, catching two of the three employees looking in your direction with wide-eyed stares. Swaying there for a moment, deciding whether or not to do as you say, Taehyung chooses not to listen.

"I'm pretty sure they know I'm gay, so I'm not sure I see the problem."

You groan. "Seriously, back the fuck up. I'm fine."

He still doesn't move. "Yeah, but what if in the next second after I leave, you faint. Or worse, those dem-," he catches himself before he says too much and drawls, "-licious croissants get here, and you eat them all."

"What?" Raising a brow, you shoot him a judgemental grimace. "You've been eyeballing me the entire time we've been here. You haven't ordered anything, liar."

Taehyung sucks in a deep breath. "It was one time. I'm an honest guy, I swear."

You're sure it's been more than once. He's probably lied about a lot of things you can't remember, but the one incident Taehyung is referring to is back when you had been trying to avoid Namjoon after that dream.

But, you don't really want to think about that now. Had the situation been different, had Jungkook not come back, you wouldn't even attempt to control yourself from having those kind of thoughts. Hell, you'd probably be with Namjoon right now.

And truthfully, that acknowledgement kind of scares you.

"You'll see. In the next 15 minutes, there's going to be croissants."

You shake your head as Taehyung takes out his phone, making what he said become true when it had initially been a lie.

With a roll of your eyes, you heave a sigh. "Don't think that I don't know what you're trying to do, Tae."

"I'm just looking out for you. Is that really so bad?"

"Please," you scoff, "you just want to know whether I recall anything new or not."

His eyes gleam with curiousity. "And? Have you?" Each word drips with intrigue.

"For the last fucking time, Tae, no!" You don't even try to mask the irritation in your voice or how loud you become.

This time all three hosts, and a couple of guests, turn to look at the two of you. Taehyung forces a smile at them. It's just enough for them to go back to minding their own business.

When their gazes re-focus on the art, Taehyung finally takes a step back. "Okay, geez." He raises his hands up in defeat, but it doesn't stop him from adding on, "Just promise me you'll tell me first if you do."

"Fine," you give in.

A pleased grin appears on Taehyung's face.

Then, thankfully, he leaves you alone, retreating into his office down the same hall the workroom is in.

With him gone, the weight of everything that's been happening feels heavier, but oddly, you prefer it over Taehyung's pestering for the time being. You know he's just worried, but it can be suffocating having someone constantly checking up on you. You don't need a babysitter.

Granted, Taehyung did provide a distraction from the fact that Jungkook's been missing for a week. You don't know where the hell he is or where he could've gone. It's unsettling to say the least.

Shouldn't he be back by now? How bad is it that he can't even stop by to let everyone know that he's okay?

But, maybe that's why he can't, because what if he's not? What if he's hurt? What if the people he's entangled with are torturing him?

That thought makes you nauseous. If that's true, then whatever Jungkook did is bad. Like really, really bad.

You wish you knew what was going on. Maybe if you did, then you could help him. All you have to do is remember, but the only times you've been able to recall any of your memories is when you find yourself in a situation similar to it.

You can't just provoke your mind to uncover something from your past. If you could, you wouldn't have trouble remembering at all.

All these ifs are aggravating. Like they're taunting you and your faulty memory.

There has to be a way for you to remember what happened. It makes no sense for it to be impossible to. Maybe you're going about this all wrong.

Thinking back on every time a memory has resurfaced, from that day on the beach to that dream about Namjoon, you realize something important. Logically, you recalled that one night of passion because you and Namjoon had physically been in a similar predicament prior to you blacking out. It was the same for when you found out you and Namjoon were having an affair.

But as for the memory where Jungkook left you alone by the oceanside, you hadn't been anywhere near one. No one was there. You were by yourself, but when you remembered, you were at work with Taehyung.

So, what's the connection between the three, if you don't have to be in the exact same situation in order to get back another lost recollection from the past?

They must have something in common.

It's not about having deja vu, being in that exact moment and how familiar it feels. Maybe it's not about familiarity at all.

The first time a memory came back, you had been lost in thought, thinking about Jungkook, who he was and where he came from. You were trying to figure things out. You remember feeling so helpless.

The second time, everyone was starting to keep secrets, the whole group, aside from you, in on it. It angered you, but the third memory, Namjoon was taking care of you, assuring that you were loved.

You sit up straight at the reception desk.

Depending on how you were feeling, a different memory returned.

Like lightening, you're struck with an idea.

You know what you need to do. You know how to get your memories back.

All of them.

a/n: finally, another update! it's been waaaay too long TT but i hope to start updating a bit more often soon. i'm a judge in a couple awards rn so it takes up quite a bit of my time, but they're almost over which means i can get back into writing! thank god bc i miss writing a lot :(

i'm excited for the next chapter bc well i kind of foreshadowed it in this chapter so i'm hoping you all have an inking of what's going to happen ;)

if not, i'll just tell you that after the next chapter, the plot is going to speed up. happy reading!