JUNE 4

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The quiet of a house all to himself was refreshing. Perfect. Until it wasn't- it got boring. Hyunjin had spent his morning in solitude, folding clothes to put in his dresser, finding appropriate living spaces for his art supplies; arranging skincare products on the counter in the bathroom. And when the quiet had lost its novelty, he sought after his speaker (which took him a minute to find since he'd left it on top of the fridge during their housewarming/moving-in party). And what did he turn on?

Twice. He'd been listening to them a lot recently.

Thirty minutes later and he was in the middle of going "shy shy shy" when the doorbell rang. Hyunjin froze in his spot and furrowed his eyebrows. He pulled his phone out of his pocket to pause the music as he went for the door, but in fact, even after he did, he continued to hear the lyrics of the pre-chorus, though muffled as they came from behind the door.

Felix.

Hyunjin opened the door, revealing himself as a pleasantly surprised, blushy mess. Oh, shit- a mess indeed- he didn't brush his hair, he didn't put concealer on that stupid pimple scar; his face was probably still puffy from eating cup ramen late last night and then taking a long, satisfying snooze. He didn't even put on deodorant!

Even though he mostly wanted to crawl under his bedsheets and hide himself, Hyunjin forced himself to try to make the best of this, and only focus on that fact that Felix was here. So he smiled sweetly (he hoped). He'd have to see if he could slip away, just for a few minutes, to fix his face and make sure he smelled alright.

"Hey, angel." As soon as his lips closed, he held his breath: still a little nervous to use the pet name. Unfortunately, this was only his second attempt- he'd chickened out of trying it again each time he'd sensed the opportunity because of a certain presence that made him even more unsure.

But it went well.

"Anyone else home right now?" That question was either very good or very bad, depending on the reaction to the answer.

"Just me," Hyunjin replied, running his hand through his hair; tucking it behind his ear. "The other two are working." He knew he really ought to get a job again, like he'd done in his high school summer breaks, even if he had enough for three months' worth of rent. But if being lazy and unemployed for a while longer left him more time to end up with impromptu visits from Felix...

"Ah. Well, I just felt like hanging, so... Here I am." He grinned. Betraying Hyunjin's expectations, his answer was rather neutral. "Hope that's okay with you."

Hyunjin couldn't help bashfully grinning back at the freckled masterpiece before him. He surprised himself with how quickly he came up with his next line: "Perfect, just when I was thinking I needed a muse." While Felix chuckled, he went on, reaching out to take Felix's hand, which they both stared at. "Suddenly I feel very inspired."

Willingly, Felix followed Hyunjin's lead up to his new room. And, luckily for Hyunjin, who was currently avoiding being looked at, he quickly noticed the painting of himself, sitting propped up on the dresser (Hyunjin was thinking of framing and hanging it- which would be the first time he'd done that with his own art.) Again Felix gaped at it, just as he'd done when it was first revealed to him.

"It really does look like me," Felix repeated- the same thing he'd said the first time- voice pitched low with a pondering tone.

Hyunjin bit his lip. "Not enough. I need more time to study," he remarked, slyly. Would've, perhaps, winked, if he'd been more confident. With a hand grazing over Felix's shoulder as he pushed gently past him, he announced, "I'll be right back."

He breathed a deep sigh of relief when he finally looked in the mirror and realized it wasn't that bad. He just splashed a little water on his face, smoothed down his hair, put on his deodorant (thanking his lucky stars that he'd had the motivation to put everything in the bathroom this morning), and lightly misted himself with lavender-vanilla something or other. Oh, and he almost forgot to put balm on his dehydrated, slightly cracked lips. All as fast as he could.

And then he was more or less confident enough to sit down on the bed he'd just made an hour or so ago (after sleeping on a bare mattress and pillow due to nothing but negligence), and pat the space beside him, a pencil and sketchbook in his other hand.

"So... this is my second gig as a model?" Felix laughed, settling in the spot Hyunjin had motioned for, turned to the side to face him.

"Yeah, I mean... corporate liked the results so much last time that they just had to work with you again," Hyunjin joked, totally satisfied in the way that it kept Felix's giggles going.

"How should I pose this time?"

Hyunjin hummed, slowly looking Felix over. Up, down. Go for it. He took one of Felix's hands and snaked an arm around his waist, leaning back to recline against the wall, Felix slumping against his chest, ear to his shoulder.

Then Hyunjin picked up his sketchbook, bending his knee so he could prop it up against his thigh, and once it was steady, he moved Felix's hand to rest closer to it, over his stomach. "I just want to draw your pretty little hands," Hyunjin breathed.

At first, Felix had been less than pliant, surprised by Hyunjin's sudden movement, but at that, he chuckled and melted into Hyunjin's chest, leaving his hand splayed where it was. They both fell quiet as Hyunjin began to sketch delicate fingers. All Hyunjin heard was the swooshing, scratching sound of pencil on paper, and Felix's slow, steady breaths.

Now this kind of alone, this kind of quiet, was truly perfect.

He couldn't believe he hadn't fucked this up yet- sent Felix running for the hills. Felix was still here, still right next to him even after all the moves he's made. Hyunjin was winning. It must mean that Felix seriously liked him... that he was attracted to him, anyway.

He wasn't quite so worried about Changbin anymore. The reason? He figured, Felix had taken it this far with him, while only hanging out with, or hugging, or choosing to sit by Changbin instead from time to time... so it must be that he was trying to make Hyunjin jealous. That was always the answer in these kinds of situations, right?

Well... Okay, maybe he was still just a little worried about Changbin.

But one thing would put his worries to rest for good. It was sure to work. He stalled the movements of his pencil.

"Hey, angel?" Hyunjin murmured, causing a pair of soft, warm eyes to shift up toward him to stare inquisitively, having been torn away from the sketchbook, where they previously rested.

"You heard the news, right?"

"Mm, about Minho hyung moving in?"

"Yeah."

There were no more empty rooms (not that Hyunjin really believed Felix would pick an empty room if he had the chance), so now it'd be all up to him to choose Hyunjin or Changbin. And that choice would prove where his heart was.

"Why, what's up?"

He bit his lip, flushing. "Oh, just wondering..." No. Why was he hesitating? "The rooms are filling up quick, huh? I might need to leave some extra space in here for someone..."

"Yup," Felix acknowledged, not getting the hint. "What about Seungmin and Jeongin? Did anyone hear back from them?"

Seungmin and Jeongin? Who cares about them? I mean-

"Yeah, they said- and I quote: 'thanks but no thanks'. Apparently Seungmin would rather stay in his rich boy house."

Felix giggled, nuzzling his head into Hyunjin's chest as Hyunjin started to draw again. He finished his sketch, then took his time carefully examining and repositioning Felix's hand for another; he held it, turned it over slowly, spread out the fingers.

Ask him. Ask. Do it. It's the perfect time. Beating around the bush won't work.

He hesitated again. Idiot. Hesitation only leads to more hesitation... which eventually leads to the front door opening and their perfect afternoon alone coming to an end.

With the front door's perfectly audible swinging open, Felix's curiosity was piqued, and Hyunjin knew his moment had been lost.

"Let's go see who it is," Felix piped, pulling himself off of Hyunjin's chest to sit up.

"Okay," Hyunjin replied, but what he meant was: 'Or we could just forget about it stay here'.

He trailed behind Felix less enthusiastically as they returned downstairs just in time to see Changbin attempt to open a pack of silverware he'd just bought for the house with his bare hands. His eyes flicked up as the cardboard packaging broke open, with an added note of surprise upon seeing Felix.

"Oh, hey, Lix." A glance at Hyunjin. Then a bit of a smile played about his previously focused, serious face. And faded again. "...What are you doing here?"

"Nothin' much. Just hangin'."

Changbin gave a slow nod, removing the silverware from the torn-open box and turning to arrange it within one of the kitchen drawers. Then it came. "Did you decide if you're moving in yet?" Just like that.

Hyunjin fought to keep a straight face- avoiding all but a little slip of his eyebrows, which pinched inward for a split second. So boldly, Changbin had immediately asked the question Hyunjin had been tip-toeing around all day. Ugh!

But you know what, fine, no matter who asked, the outcome would stay the same, right? Felix would choose him. It only made sense. But Hyunjin still felt himself break out with nervous sweat as he waited for the answer.

Felix hummed. "Oh, right... I was thinking I wanna spend a lot of the summer with my family, since I don't get to see them when I'm at college. So I think I'll just come over for hangouts and sleepovers here and there," he chuckled.

Hyunjin's heart dropped. He'd been so focused on which room Felix would pick- he hadn't even considered the possibility of Felix staying with his family. Maybe because he'd just been so desperate to get out himself...

It made sense, Hyunjin figured, that he'd want that. But selfishly, he was deeply disappointed, and didn't really get it; didn't really care. Maybe he would understand a little more if he knew what it was like to love his family.

Hyunjin felt it was bad idea to leave Felix alone in the kitchen with Changbin... but at that moment the letdown got to him so badly that he couldn't resist the urge to retreat and shut himself into his room. His room, solely his- and that's how it would stay.

He shouldn't have, but he took it personally.

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wait i was kinda cookin with the last hyunlix chapter... this one's mid

wasn't even planning on making this one, i just whipped it up real quick cuz i was like hm we could use another changhyunlix update