It was one thing to accept his crush on Steve. It was another to accept his sexuality.

Yes, Bucky wasn't an idiot. He probably knew all along that he had feelings for Steve, but he kept them repressed and in a place far away that no one could touch. Of course, it was never easy to hide away from one's feelings, and eventually Bucky's caught up to him.

So, he was sat at his bed after another long day of having to watch Peggy and Steve talk and laugh together. Peggy didn't ignore Bucky entirely, which Bucky greatly appreciated. The couple also weren't together the whole day at school, but the time they were at lunch was enough to make Bucky want to hurl.

He wasn't even sure when his feelings for Steve began. When he saw him for the first time, perhaps. Not love at first sight or anything. Besides, Bucky didn't believe in love at first sight in the slightest. Love was so much more than just looks and first impressions. However, Bucky would be lying to himself if he said he wasn't attracted to Steve as soon as he saw him.

Steve, with his chiseled jaw and sharp cheekbones. His intense blue-green eyes captured Bucky right away. Mostly they were blue, but sometimes in certain lighting, and depending on what Steve wore, they looked more green. He also loved Steve's smile that could light up the whole room. Bucky wondered what it was like to make Steve smile that that. If he could, he'd never take that smile for granted.

Steve could go from being cheerful to serious in about .2 seconds. It wasn't the seriousness that suggested sadness or anger, but it was a seriousness that Bucky didn't quite understand and planned to find out. He was nice to everyone, which was exactly why Bucky wasn't sure why he even liked Steve. Steve wasn't very nice to him at all. It wasn't like he was blatantly rude, but Bucky thought that Steve ignoring him like he was currently doing was almost worst.

Still, it was no wonder Peggy liked Steve. And, undoubtedly, so did Bucky.

Bucky liked Steve, but the idea of liking all boys was a strange one. He had only every been attracted to girls before and never thought of guys in that same way before. He thought maybe he was only attracted to girls. Girls and Steve. As he thought about it he knew it weren't true. Sure, he found guys pretty attractive. It just hadn't ever been anything he had been allowed to consider. Now, his heart wasn't giving him a choice. There was something more to Steve than just his looks, and maybe that was what attracted Bucky at first, but Steve's personality was what he had fallen for.

Would Bucky have to come out to his parents, now that he knew the truth about himself? He didn't like the idea of it at all. Maybe if he never got a boyfriend, his parents would never have to know. It wasn't like he'd ever date Steve. Steve liked Peggy, and not boys.

Somehow, he suspected Winifred already knew. Bucky sometimes thought that his mother was a psychic. She seemed to know everything about him. He wouldn't be surprised if she knew this, too. But his father. . . Bucky had no idea was George would say about his being bisexual.

There. He said it. He was bisexual.

Bucky let out a heavy breath. Why couldn't he have just been normal?

As much as he wanted to keep this new information hidden forever, he also knew he was going to burst if he didn't tell anyone at all. It was much too big of a secret to carry on his own; such a heavy burden that would bring him down.

But he didn't want to tell anyone, not really. He knew it would be like a small weight off his chest if he did. He thought of all the potential people he could tell.

His parents. Definitely not.

Peggy. No. She'd surely figure out his crush on Steve if she knew that Bucky liked boys, too.

Bruce. He didn't think he knew Bruce well enough.

Natasha. Who knew what she'd do with that information.

Rebecca.

That was it. His sister wouldn't make fun of him. Bucky was already positive that she wasn't homophobic. Like him, she shipped Sherlock and John together (Bucky also suspected that she wrote fanfiction).

He would tell her. Just not yet.

**

And so Steve was beautiful.

It was hard not to stare at his ass, and even harder not to stare into his eyes. Yes, his ass was fine and firm, but quite frankly Bucky found Steve's face much more appealing. He wouldn't allow himself the luxury of staring at his ass every time he was in front of Bucky, or when he bent over. It was one thing to get caught staring at Steve's face, but he really didn't have any excuses if he were to be caught staring at his ass. Instead, he told himself if he were to be staring at any part of Steve, it'd be his face.

Bucky had gotten strange looks from Peggy a few times while looking at Steve, and during those times he would look away, then look around the whole cafeteria as if he were doing a perimeter check. He always thought this was less conspicuous, but it still probably made Peggy suspicious.

Peggy didn't ever ask questions, though. Bucky suspected that she already knew, and the fact that she never said anything made him extremely grateful and truly appreciate her as a friend.

They had gotten themselves in a big mess, and they both knew it. Bucky didn't expect Peggy to stop dating Steve just because he liked him, nor did she expect him to stop liking Steve just because she was dating him. It was a terrible solution for a terrible situation, and the topic couldn't be kept locked in a cage forever; soon enough they would be forced to bring it up whether they liked it or not.

Once again, Bucky had been caught staring. However, this time it was not only Peggy who had seen them, but Clint as well. Clint was currently sitting with Natasha, next to Peggy. He had gotten over the initial shock and euphoria of dating Natasha, but he was still so clearly in love with her that it made Bucky want to barf.

Clint caught Bucky's eye and mouthed something at him.

Stop staring at him, you creep.

Bucky looked away, red in the face. His jaw was clenched, not out of anger for Clint, but for himself. Soon enough, the whole school would figure out his stupid crush on Steve.

And Peggy. . .he could hardly look at her. The pitying look on her face made him want to punch a wall, or Steve, in his stupidly perfect teeth. It was his fault, after all. Somehow, Bucky had the idea that this all stemmed from Steve ignoring him in the first place. It started off with Bucky having the desire to be friends, but then that desire turned into something more because he couldn't have that. This was a theory that wouldn't have made any sense to anyone else but Bucky himself.

Maybe he should just at least try to talk to Steve. Surely, Steve couldn't blatantly ignore him forever, especially at a table filled with their friends.

But what would he say? They hadn't really talked yet, and any attempts would probably only make Bucky look desperate. He mulled over possible things to say up until when the bell rang and it was too late.

"The time really does fly, doesn't it?" Peggy said. She stood up, her hand linked with Steve's. Bucky eyed those hands until Peggy abruptly yanked them apart, obviously catching onto Bucky's staring. Steve had no clue, and only frowned at this.

Peggy then smiled at Steve, as if to reassure him. Steve smiled back. Bucky had to look away. It was fortunate, too, because during that time Peggy have him a quick peck on the lips before the two parted.

Not before long, Bucky was left alone with Clint and Natasha.

"Well, I have to get to class," Clint said. Clint and Natasha kissed, which left Bucky to stand there awkwardly.

After Clint was gone, Natasha rounded on Bucky immediately.

"You need to stop looking so miserable, Barnes," she said.

Bucky sighed and began to walk away. He really didn't want to deal with her right now. In the hallway, students were rushing left and right in attempts to get to class before the bell rang again, the one that determined the start of class. In a minute Bucky would be amongst that crowd.

Though it seemed it wouldn't be that easy, because Natasha had stepped in front of him and she wouldn't be letting him go anywhere just yet.

"I have to get to class," Bucky said. "Fury won't be happy if I start getting marked as late. He already let me off easy for breaking the asshole's nose. And if I get in trouble again, my mother really won't be happy. You haven't seen her angry. It's terrifying."

Natasha didn't seen to care so much about this, though. She pulled him into an empty classroom and shut the door.

"What are you doing?"

"We need to talk," Natasha said, ignoring Bucky entirely.

"No, I need to get to class," Bucky said, turning the doorknob. Natasha grabbed his wrist. Bucky turned around, his gaze intense enough to make Natasha back away. "I don't know what you usually get away with, but I am not about to be late for class. Unlike you, I actually care about doing good at this hellhole."

He opened the door. The sound of students was already fading in the hallway, but Bucky didn't notice this too much because he had accidentally forgotten to put in his hearing aids that day. More like, it was accidentally on purpose. He did, of course, notice that besides a few stragglers, the hallway was empty. The bell had rung, too, but Bucky hadn't noticed this, either.

"Geez, Barnes. It's one late, not like your fucking ditching."

Bucky didn't hear that, either. He strode to his locker with purpose.

He didn't care that he was going to be late. It was only his excuse for getting away from her. He already knew what she was going to say, and it was definitely something about Steve. He didn't want to hear it.

He grabbed his notes from his locker before slamming it shut, causing a freshman to flinch and glare at Bucky. She turned and hurried off to her own class, not because she was afraid of Bucky, but he suspected she was afraid that she was late already.

The afternoon was always great for Bucky. There was drama, where he could stare at Steve without any of his friends watching. After that he had a free period. Since he drove to school he could drive home during this time. Sometimes he did, but most of the time he stayed at the library to finish his homework. When he did homework while at school it suddenly didn't seem so bad.

They were doing skits with partners, something about an interviewer on a talkshow and  celebrity being interviewed. There was more to it than that, but Bucky didn't pay much attention after the partners were picked.

Names were pulled from a hat—when teachers usually did this it wasn't an actual hate, but Ms. Pine had a purple fedora—and one by when students went off with their partners to some area in the large classroom. As fate would have it, only two names were left at the end.

I bet you could guess what those two names were.

How cliche, Bucky thought.

He wasn't sure whether to be thrilled, but in the end, of course he was. This would force Steve to talk to him, and it didn't even have to be about anything other than something related to their assignment. Hearing his voice, directed to Bucky, was enough.

"Bucky and Steve Rogers," Ms. Pine said.

Shot Bucky a knowing look. Okay, that was definitely Bucky's imagination. He thought perhaps he was going crazy, becoming paranoid. Not everyone knew about his crush, and certainly not the staff.

Bucky glanced over at Steve. He couldn't read Steve's expression. Was he mad about this? Happy?

Bucky wandered over to him, his head held high and throat feeling like it was stuffed with cotton. He swallowed, and and he could barely breathe.

Steve didn't say anything at first, but merely stared at the floor. Bucky wanted to shout, "would you look at me!", but he didn't want to cause a scene. Well, okay, there was probably no circumstance in which he would shout that at Steve. Eventually, Steve looked up. He had that serious look in his face, that serious look that Bucky began to realize came around when he was trying to hide his emotion.

Finally, Steve said, "do you want to be the interviewer?"

"I don't care." When Steve didn't respond, Bucky said, "sure. What celebrity should you be?"

"We're not supposed to use real celebrities. Just make one up."

"Oh."

"Did you even listen to Ms. Pine?"

"No," Bucky admitted. He wasn't about to tell Steve why he didn't listen, but he didn't have to lie either. With the way Steve was acting lately around him, Bucky was sure he wouldn't ask any questions anyhow.

"Well, we're supposed to make up a celebrity that slowly gets more angry at the interviewer until they lose it at the end," Steve explained.

It sounded ridiculous, but then again, Ms. Pine was ridiculous. She was looking at them, as if sensing that they hadn't accomplished anything yet. Looking around, Bucky could see that the other students were already writing down their lines on paper. Bucky hadn't even brought a pencil.

Sensing Steve's eyes on him, Bucky looked back at him. For once, it was Steve who had to look away quickly. Were his cheeks red, or was that just Bucky's imagination? It was hot in this classroom, after all.

Steve was probably just waiting for a response from Bucky. Yes, that was it. Bucky still hadn't said anything after Steve had explained what it was they were supposed to be doing.

"Okay," Bucky said. Wow.

"I guess. . .lets get started?"

"Okay."

This was going to be a long forty minutes.

**

A/n: This chapter is a fucking mess.

'Because Bucky's not a complete dunderhead he realizes why he's so bothered about Steve dating Peggy. He wants to date Steve. Basically this chapter is just Bucky pining over Steve.'

That's what I originally had for this chapter, so the drama thing was what I added because it was too short. It's ridiculously cliche, and doesn't really serve any purpose or get the story any further ahead. I guess it'll do the story some good, because it gives the two a chance to interact and keeps the readers from going crazy.

But this chapter is still a mess, regardless.

Anyway, thanks for 1k reads! It makes me feel better on this terrible first day of school. I decided to give Bucky a free period because I, too, have a free period last and have the opportunity to drive myself home and it's fantastic. Okay, technically not yet but I can in a couple of months. I'm pretty sure free periods are a thing in the U.S and you can leave school for them? Lol I'm Canadian and don't know shit.

I apologize for this unnecessarily long author's note.