I heard you told your friends that I'm just not your type

I thought you loved me, or atleast liked me. You were always flirting with me and now I hear from one of your friends, that you told them, that I'm not your type. You could've said that I was not your type, when we first met. You could've never been this flirty with me, if I was not your type. I had so much hope. I hoped that you felt the same way about me, that I felt about you. I hoped you could be the one to make me happy. To make me feel loved. And you made me happy ad you made me feel loved. But this morning your best friend Blake Gray came to me and told me everything you said about me. That I'm not your type. That you don't like me in a romantic way. A long time ago, I promised myself, that I would never hope again. Hope breaks you. Hope hurts you. I know, for some people Hope is the best thing in the world, but not to me. If I think of hope, I think about the time I hoped my parents would stop fighting and just tell me how much they love me. But that never happened. If I think of Hope, I think of the many times I stood at the hospital bed of my sister Charli and hoped, that she wouldn't die. But she died. I thought I could trust you, so I allowed myself to hope. But that just proves again, that Hope breaks you.

If that's how you really feel, then why'd you call last night?

You couldn't sleep last night, so you called me. I felt so special, that I was the one you called. Now I'm trying to figure out, why you called. If I was not your type, then why did you flirt with me. Why did you kiss me? I was not the one leaning in, when our face were only inches apart. I'm so confused. In one moment you're kissing me and in the next Moment you're telling your friends that I'm not your type. That doesn't fit together. Why do I even think about it. Last night is last night and today is today. And today it doesn't matter anymore that you called me in the middle of the night. And I'll stop thinking about it. But, Noah, I want you to answer one Question. Why?

You say all I ever do is just control your life

Blake told me, that you told him that I control you. I don't know what to say. All I want right now is to drive to your apartment and ask you, why you said that. I want to ask you when I controlled you. But I can't see you right now. I never want to see you again. You were the only one that could still hurt me, and like anybody else, you did. And I thought you were different. Out of all the people that ever hurt me, and that were a lot, you hurt me the most.

Yeah, I heard you said I ain't the type for you
I don't regret it though, I learned from it

Even though my heart is broken, I don't regret it. Because I learned once again, you can't hope. I really hoped this time it wouldn't be this way. But nothing i hoped became true. I'll never hope again. You were the one teaching me how to hope again, you're the one I learned from that I shouldn't hope. Funny, huh.

They should have you locked up for all the time you stole from us, woo

I dont regret anything, just the time I wasted thinking about you. I was so dumb. I tried to spend every minute with you and you never said that you didn't like hanging out with me, so I thought you liked spending time me. What a wast of time!

Took you out when I had no money

I had no money, but I wanted to do something special for you, so I worked harder until I had enough money to do the things I wanted to do with you. You said, you could pay, but this was the day I planned for you, so I insisted on paying. What a waste!

You want somebody that'll keep you warm at night
Then tell me why you actin' cold to me?

You said you wanted someone who doesn't like you just because of your money. You said you wanted someone to hold you at night and make you feel warm and loved. But you never gave me the chance to be this person to you. I did everything for you. I tried everything to make you feel loved, but I can't do this, when all you ever do is acting cold towards me. You want to be loved, but you're not ready to love.

Yeah, heard you threw away the pictures
But you still got the memories of us

Even if you throw away all my clothes i left at your apartment, all the pictures that hung at the wall, you can't throw away memories. They are always going to be in the back of your head, you' ll always remember me. One last time, I allow me to hope. To hope that you think of me when you cry yourself to skepp, because no one is there to hope.

Okay, so I skipped some lyrics, because I didn't know what to write. Well, pls give me feedback in the comments. Again, english isn't my first language, so sry if I wrote something wrong. (This was one of the first oneshots i wrote, so it's not very good)