Philip sat in the nurses office and twitched softly, it was normal for him to end up here after getting beaten up almost every day. Only because he was different. He'd have to wait hours for his parents to pick him up.

Philip felt his mouth to cry, his felt a cold rush run through his small body. He felt himself lose control of his body as he started to violently shake.

A few moments later, the nurse rushed in and gasped, she mumbled a thank you to God that he hadn't fallen off the bed. She laid him on his side as his body shook violently.

She tried calling his parents once again, no answer.

Philips pov

I laid there with no energy, I wouldnt bother talking. She wouldn't understand my slurs. I could only lay there as my muscles ached. Slowly regaining my energy, I opened my eyes and watched her watching me.

"Do you need water, hun?" She asked softly as she brushed my hair out of my face. I twitched softly and shook my head, slowly sitting up as I felt myself become that little bit stronger.

"I-Is d-dad at least c-coming?" I asked with a husky whisper. Pa would never make time for me or Angelica...He never had the time...

She shook her head sadly, her eyes telling the whole story once again.

I was sick of it.

"I-I ggg-get it, MMM-Ma'am." He huffed, I hated this stutter.

You ever seen IT? Yeah. B-B-Bill is me.

Expect I've been cursed with epilepsy and twitches. I got the bad end of the bargain, while Angelica is the pretty popular girl.

Im the nerdy freak.

Nobody really....really loved me.

I mean, I get the normal love parents should give. Expect...well...we make our own dinner...get ourselves to school...feed outselves...and I don't know.

sixteen years old and a fourteen year old shouldn't do. All by themselves...all the time...

She glanced at the phone as it started ringing. She hesitantly answered it. "Hello?....Yes....Yes, sir....he'll be waiting, alright....thank you.." she hung up "Your father...'Pa' will be here in about twenty minutes, alright?"

"Alright, Thank you. Ma'am." I smiled, getting my things ready and putting shoesback on.

A few minutes later, Pa walked in and grabbed my arm, muttering swears under his breath "Fucking selfish little trouble child- I'm fuckingworking to keep your ass medicated and I never even get a simple fucking thank you!" He snapped, pushing me into the back seat of the car.

I kept my head down as he drove home. He didn't stop ranting "Maybe you wouldn't get beaten up if you weren't so fucking weird, Philip. Ever think of that?"

"I c-c-can't help it..." I mumbled sadly, yelping as he roughly parked the car "Oh c-c-c-can't you?" He mocked "p-p-p-poor Philip!" He chuckled "Get out. I have to go back to work. Your father is sick in bed."

"He's n-n-not my dad." I signed, getting out. Thomas wasn't the best person in my eyes, Pa left our Mom for him, how much am I mean to like him, like...really?

I went inside and went straight to the bathroom, cleaning up whatever the nurse had missed, including under my shirt and all.

I heard the shower start from their bedroom bathroom, he started singing.

"I will not make...the same mistakes that you did...I will not let myself, cause my heart to much misery..."

Jesus fucking Christ

That man could sing.

It sounded almost...like he was...crying...the strain...yet heart warming symphony...

He'd been with my dad since Angelica was born...I don't remember my mom...

"I will not break, the way you did, you fell so hard..."

I sighed, going into my room and laying on my bed. My heart shattered as I couldn't stop thinking about Pa's words before...

"I've learned the hard way...to never let it get that far.."

Suddenly I felt broken, I felt myself twitch once again before bursting into tears. I was a mistake, he doesn't want someone like me..

"Because of you, I never stray to far from the sidewalk.."

My own father hates me...my sister has everything...I have a bed and clothes...I know that's enough...but...

"Because of you, I learned to on the safe side so I don't get hurt..."

I see the bruises he leaves on Thomas...I wonder why he stays with him...Why does he hurt him? Doesn't be love him?

"Because of you, I find it hard to trust not only me but everyone around me...because of you..."

Why don't we leave him? If he hates me so much...I shouldn't bother him anymore...

"I'm am afraid..."

I heard the water switch off, quickly, I laid in my bed and closed my eyes. I honestly have no point living here...why should I bother anymore?

"I lose my way...and it's not to long before you point it out...I can not cry...because I know that's weakness in your eyes..."

Pa kept a gun under his bed incase of an emergency..

"I'm forced to take, a smile and laugh every day of my life..."

I shrugged weakly and wiped my tears, sitting up and taking a deep breath. I don't want him to blame himself because of the gun...I could find rope in the garage...

"My heart can't possibly break when it wasn't even whole to start with-"

He snuck my way out silently and dug around in the messy garage. Looking for rope thick enough to hold me up.

"Because of you, I never stray to far from the side walk, because of you I've learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt."

I made my way back to my room and tied the noose, it was harder than I thought...

"Because of you,I find it hard to trust not only me but everyone around me, because of you...I am afraid..."

I got my desk chair and tied the rope around my lightshade. My heart was racing at this point and I was twitching every few seconds.

"I watched you die, i heard you cry every night in your sleep..."

I put my head through the loop

"J was so young, you should have know better than to lean on me...You never thought of anyone else, you just say your pain..."

I heard him choke back a loud sob and felt guilt crawl up my chest

"A-And now I c-cry in the middle of the night for the same damn thin-"

I flinched as I heard the loud gun shot followed by silence. I went to down but my foot slipped. I saw one last tear hit the wood below me before nothing.

The end