[Verse 1]

Take a deep breath

Until both sides of your heart get numb

Until it hurts a little

Let out your breath even more

Until you feel

Like there's nothing left inside

It's alright if you run out of breath

No one will blame you

It's okay to make mistakes sometimes

Because anyone can do so

Although comforting by saying it's alright

Are just words

Do you know what it's like to contemplate suicide?

Because I do.

It's something so indescribable that it's hard to really put in words.

All it feels like is numb.

Because when I came to the decision that I wanted to die, all I felt was numbness.

Some people say that when they stand on top of a building so high and feel the breeze hitting their face like the waves of a never-ending dawn, happiness arises like bile in their throat because of the rush of emotions. And yet, when their feet feels the non-existent floor beneath them amidst the sounds of the city below, fear grapples with those emotions and they fall back, breathless and questioning.

"Stop saying it's alright." I used to tell him. Him who ran to the deck of my demise and pulled me back in a heap of the white nightdress I was adorning and flight of ebony hair whipping his face. Him and the tears streaming down like tinsel, holographic from the moonlight shining through bickering clouds.

Him, who I didn't really know but still chose to get to know me.

[Chorus]

Someone's breath. That heavy breath

How can I see through that?

Though I can't understand your breath

It's alright I'll hold you

Do you know what it's like to see the person you love fall?

Because I do.

It's something so indescribable that it's hard to really put in words.

All it feels like is fear.

Because when I saw her preparing to jump from the tower we had held our last promise, all I felt was fear.

It's hard to understand what is going on in her mind. Threads spindled so tightly together that I no longer held the ability to find the ends and untangle them. The day I knew it was all going to hell was the day we saw the casket in front of us and reality splashed upon our youthful lips like ice. And we hated the cold.

"It's not your fault that she died," I had said when the grown-ups cried and flowers fell upon the grave, "She was already a ticking time bomb."

Her cold charcoal eyes stared into the dead wood, never straying from the target, "Do you know what I told her when she said the world was getting to her?" she asked me as the hair splashed on my forehead brushed against my eyes.

"What?"

Face blank, she answered as the dandelions swirled into the air,

"I told her Death was her only escape."

[Verse 2]

It's alright if you run out of breath

No one will blame you

It's okay to make mistakes sometimes

Because anyone can do so

Although comforting by saying it's alright

Are just words

Days.

It had been days since I had attempted to kill myself and he stopped me.

A month since our friend had died.

I hadn't cried.

Even when I saw the casket pass my eyes as a hollow reminder of life and death, I didn't cry. Even when I received her text the night she died, repeating the words I had droned to her without thought that 'Death was her only way out', I didn't cry. Even when I rushed towards the tower and yelled her name through chapped lips and empty hope, I hadn't cried. Even when I saw her sitting on the sill of her window, gazing towards the wanderers below at the apartment she had resided, I hadn't cried.

Even when I saw her back vanish through the blanket of Prussian blue and heard the crash below of metal breaking and glass shattering and screaming and yelling and blood, crimson splattered on the ground, I couldn't cry.

Because I didn't deserve to.

[Chorus]

Someone's breath. That heavy breath

How can I see through that?

Though I can't understand your breath

It's alright I'll hold you

Days.

It had been days since she had attempted to kill herself and I stopped her.

A month since our friend had died.

I thought I understood her. I really did. I thought that I understood the brokenness that resided within that hollow frame I was such a stranger to. And yet, I didn't. I didn't understand why she thought it was her fault. Was there a story I had yet to know?

As I saw her sitting quietly by the balcony now, the breeze dancing through the strands of black I loved so much, I silently wondered what was going on in that wondrous head of hers. Her mouth breathed out wisps of smoke that circled around the cold winter air, a jacket hung over her shoulders to provide her artificial warmth. Pants. The heavy pants that I could not decipher yet yearned to understand.

She never talked to me after Sohye's suicide.

But, sometimes you don't need to understand to comfort someone.

So, I walked towards her and held her as snowflakes fell.

Because sometimes, true love needs to be expressed in an artificial warmth.

[Verse 3]

Even if others think your sigh

Takes out energy and strength

I already know

That you had a day that's hard enough

To let out even a small sigh

Now don't think of anything else

Let out a deep sigh

Just let it out like that

He never let me out of sight.

Day after day passed. And all he did was care for me.

I never told him about Sohye. It was buried so deep within me that letting it out would crush my heart into dust. At the moment, they were just pieces. But, at least pieces could be taped together. I didn't mind the scar.

As the days went by and winter grew colder, he was the fire that thawed out my heart.

I experienced laughter. Something I didn't know I could still emit.

And we started going on dates again, like normal couples. I didn't realize that I had forgotten that he was my boyfriend until the day he pulled me out of the little room I huddled in and pushed me into the snow. Before I could get up and ask him to leave me alone in the darkness, he dazzled me with a million stars by placing his lips on mine.

And through winter, I found summer.

Because maybe I didn't understand Sohye. And maybe I made a mistake.

But, he reminded me that I had tomorrow.

And tomorrow, I'll go to Sohye's grave and place daffodils, as a sign of remembrance but also one of a new beginning for myself.

[Outro]

Someone's breath. That heavy breath

How can I see through that?

Though I can't understand your breath

It's alright I'll hold you

You really did a good job

I never let her out of sight.

Day after day passed. And all I did was care for her.

She never told me about Sohye. But, I didn't mind. Because the story told within the heavy pants like prayers spoken through twisted nights of sacred dreams were more than enough. Her heart had been shattered into pieces. But, at least pieces could be taped together. I didn't mind the scar.

As the days went by and winter grew colder, I wished on a shooting star that I could thaw the icy cage around her heart.

She laughed. I almost cried the day she laughed.

And we started going on dates again, like normal couples. I never forgot us. There would always be us. And one day, when I saw her like a withering flower in the dark and musty room, I pulled her out and pushed her into the snow. And before she had the chance to protest, I crashed my lips on hers and poured out all the love I could as if I was afraid she would disappear. But, maybe I was afraid.

Because I loved her so much, I didn't want to understand her anymore. I wanted to heal her.

And through winter, I became her summer.

Because maybe I didn't understand her.

But, I didn't need to.

And tomorrow, we'll go to Sohye's grave and place daffodils, as a sign of remembrance but also one of a new beginning for us. 

. 

TAGGING : kpop

A/N : 

Alrighty, so I wrote this story for the song fiction contest for Wattpad's kpop account. The song is called Breathe by Lee Hi and it talks about a person who just breathes and never tells his / her's true story. And the person doesn't understand why he / she is breathing so heavily but she / he tells him it's alright and encourages the person and at last tell them he / she has done good.

Because honestly, we can never truly understand someone.

And honestly, sometimes we don't need to understand someone to heal them.

I didn't want to give the main characters names because I wanted them to have a story that you could relate to. [ put in the genders instead so that it'd be easier to differentiate them ]. I hope that this story has impacted you somewhat and I hope it's good enough for the competition sksks

Thank you for this opportunity <3