Me? Posting two days in a row and then going silent for a month probably? Never...

Set after Unlocked so uh spoilers for that I suppose. in which sophie and keefe write each other letters that they will never read

There's also swearing in this by the way so be warned if that makes you uncomfortable

He thinks he will have only one thing to say to her, so that's how he begins.

(I'm sorry)

She thinks she has nothing left to say to him, so that's how she begins.

(I don't want to speak to you ever again)

But then he keeps writing, and so does she, because there have never been enough words for the two of them.

So they write, and they write, and they don't read what they've written.

Because reminders hurt too much, and that's why the letters exist in the first place.

To clear the air. To get this weight off her chest. To stop him from thinking of her every time he sees the stars.

So they write, and they write, and they don't read what they've written.

What is left to be said? she thinks.

I'm so sorry, he repeats.

Because when you think about someone for long enough you see them everywhere, and Sophie is done with her ocean, and he is done with his stars.

...

His letter starts simply enough.

I'm sorry, Sophie.

For everything I've done. For everything I've put you through. For everything I blamed you for putting me through.

Because here's the thing. I think you're done with me, but I can't get you out of my head. Even though it was my choice to leave. I can't let you go.

...

Hers starts easily enough, too.

I don't ever want to speak to you again.

But this isn't speaking to you, is it? I can't talk to you, so maybe I will write. Because I'm done with you, but I can't get you out of my head.

I need to let you go, so here are a few reasons I should definitely not miss you.

1: You left me

2: You left me

3: you. you left me.

4: you left me behind.

...

I can't let you go. But I tried, goddammit I tried. I tried so hard that now I can't stop thinking of you.

So, Sophie, if you ever see this, I think I should tell you the truth once and for all. Maybe now I can forget you and move on.

I'm sick of chasing you.

There, I said it.

Maybe I leave so you'll follow. Maybe I withdraw so you'll reach for me. Maybe I run so you'll chase me instead.

And isn't that the worst part? Because I keep on torturing you, and you never give up, and I'm never satisfied, so I keep on running. And now I'm not running so you'll follow. I'm running to protect you from having to follow me again.

I'm sorry, Sophie, because I can't fucking stand this anymore.

...

5: I can't keep on chasing you and chasing you and always losing you because you're chasing me too

6: the idea of missing you makes me want to scream

7: you're too much for me to handle

8: I think of you when I see the ocean

9: it snowed yesterday, here, and I saw the icicles hanging from the eves, and I thought about your eyes and the way sunlight sparkles off of them. Is it snowing in the Forbidden Cities? I have always liked the snow. It's quiet.

10: see what you turn me into? I can't stand it anymore.

11: I can't stand you anymore

...

That letter is crumpled up and shoved under his bed with discarded poems and songs he's written and hated and didn't have the will to tear into pieces.

It's trash. He can't get rid of it.

So he begins again.

I'm so sorry, Sophie.

I keep fucking up, don't I? That's my problem. Everyone has one, but no one has ever made such a mess of things that I manage to do every time.

You stayed with me as long as you could. As long as I let you.

I guess that's all I can ask for, anyway.

...

She has a box full of letters to him. They are neatly folded, creased perfectly. That box is only ever opened to add a new letter, and now she opens it again, avoiding the snippets of words she's written flying at her.

Words like I miss you and Come back and I wonder where you are right now and be safe.

The dates on the letters are scattered over months. But now she finds she's not done yet, because she has too much left to say to him. So she takes a fresh sheet of paper, and a pen.

I can't miss you, because then you'll never come back.

That's how you work, right? Someone cares about you, and you stay away all the longer for it.

Maybe I hate you for it.

...

"do you remember" is my least favorite phrase in the entire world.

Yes, I fucking remember. I wish I didn't.

Every time I see the stars I think of you, and now the night sky is ruined because I want to go back to you every time I see it, and I can't.

Not that you'd want me to.

...

There was this song I listened to when I was younger. I don't remember what it was called, but it had a line that I remember whenever I think of you.

It's about missing someone. It's about hating someone. It's about the agony of remembering.

Sometimes I want to Wash my own mind, wouldn't that be nice? To erase you?

...

I miss you.

...

I hate you.

...

I can't stand the thought of you.

...

Why can't you come home?

...

He's written too much.

She's said more than she ever wanted to.

They wrote, and they wrote, and they will never read what they've written.

There have never been enough words for the two of them.

...

Love, Keefe.

...

Love, Sophie.

What is it about sokeefe that's just so PERFECT for the letter-writing trope?? (aka one of my favorite tropes actually)

hahaha angst. At least no one died </3