*Tony's POV*

I turn on the TV and The Late Night Show with Stephen Colbert is on.  I study the carrot haired man on my TV, every word he speaks is getting an obscene reaction from the crowd. This man speaks about putting up 'The Great Wall of America' and everyone cheers and laughs. He obviously gets the wrong message though and thinks that they were positive supporting cheers but even I could see they were not. I study this man even more. His red tie looks like it was made from the blood of the people he killed and his multiple chins jiggle with every movement. His face rests in a very sad smile, if you can even call it that. Something clicks in my brain and I remember who this man is. It's bloody Donald Trump! 

I didn't recognise the trumpinator in all his beauty... Boy has he never looked this beautiful before. He starts talking about the 'beautiful, big, fat door' that will be in the middle of the wall. Boy would I like to go through his big, fat door. He continues to discuss with Stephen Colbert what his views are on certain points but I can't quite make out sounds over his beauty. I laugh at every joke he makes even though I know they are horrible jokes, but I don't know why i'm laughing, its like my brain has an immediate response to this man, I know another part of my body does. 

The video ends and I just sit gobsmacked. 'Why do I have feelings for a man?' I ask myself. 'Gay's are bad people, why am I turning gay? What is wrong with me? Lord why is this man so beautiful?' I keep repeating these questions to myself but God doesn't seem to answer. 'Guess I am going to have to work out whats wrong on my own then.' I say a little to loudly. I get changed into my budgie smugglers (A/N*If you do not know what Budgie smugglers are google tony abbot wearing budgie smugglers!*) and weave my way around the snakes and drop bears, to make it down to the beach. I hit the water and start paddling out. I hear a muffled sound, almost like a siren blaring, so I lift my head out of the water and see everyone panicking to get in. The shark alarm siren is deafening and I try to swim as fast as I can back to shore. I see people pointing behind me, yelling and screaming. My heart drops. I turn around and see every swimmers worst fear. A great white with it jaw wide open heading straight towards me.