Songfic! Inspired by "This is Gospel" - Panic! at the Disco

The song is amazing! Please listen to it while reading this!

It was another rainy day. Great, you murmured to yourself. The streets were beautiful when it rained, and your walk around was always at night.

You loved the rain, not because you got to watch several people struggling with the hazard of slipping-you had the feet of an angel, but because of the singer who appeared when it rained. Out in the middle of the city, next to a quaint donut shop, the beautiful singer sat on his chair.

His friend played a beautiful tune on a violin, sad but slow and wonderful. Under a small umbrella, the friend played his instrument, and the blond sang.

This is gospel, for the fallen ones

The rain pattered on the street like a melody. The moist air stung your lungs in a refreshing way, your head relaxing instantly to the music. You exited your old job, the small coffee shop on 32 Ave. You always stopped to hear them perform on these nights.

Locked away in permanent slumber
Assembling their philosophies
From pieces of broken memories

You caught eyes with the violinist, and your heart shuddered with regret. You knew him. You'd known the both of them, one day. The violin sounded so sweet, so rich and beautiful. And the violinist looked calm, collected, yet him seemed as if he was enjoying himself. Like he always did.

He smiled warmly, as if at you, though his eyes were filled with grief.

Oh, this is the beat of my heart, this is the beat of my heart

The soft voice made you glance back at the singer. His hair was wet from the rain-he'd let the violinist use the umbrella and taken nothing for himself. He carried the most unique voice you'd ever heard. So sweet, yet sharp and somewhat deep. His eyes were a deep blue, innocent but inviting.

He'd suffered a great loss. He didn't come to your quaint coffee shop anymore after that.

Their gnashing teeth and criminal tongues conspire against the odds
But they haven't seen the best of us yet

You could see the passion in his eyes, slight resemblance of his father in them. His dad had once been your boss, he had owned that coffee house you enjoyed so happily.

If you love me let me go

Tears streamed down his face as he played. Pain spreaded in his voice. His blue eyes never caught yours on that rainy day.

If you love me let me go

You walked closer to the area where they are performing. Your feet slapped against the hard sidewalk and quickly to the men, as if they were calling you.

'Cause these words are knives and often leave scars

That singer.

He'd loved you once.

You still love him.

The fear of falling apart

You'd understood all of his sorrows once. He'd hold you in his arms and dream of never letting go.

And truth be told, I never was yours
The fear, the fear of falling apart

He'd loved you also. His voice was your comfort and your forgiveness was his. You'd refused to let him go, someone would've had to drive you two apart.

And someone did.

You caught eyes with the green-haired violinist, who played loud and soft and the same time. You smiled with a burning joy. You loved his taste in music. You loved his sweet nature. You loved his talent.

He loved you.

You never knew of it. He'd hidden his affection so you would be happy with the singer. The main. The lead. The celebrity. The hero.

The hero always gets the girl.

Your own tears streamed down as Sanji's voice went soft, and the words seemed directionless yet more meaningful without a direction. His eyes left yours, and he sang himself into emotional oblivion.

You would never love him again.

You two couldn't be together. You weren't good for each other. Broken hearts are created when love goes wrong, or doesn't go anywhere. You heart was shattered to an end.

What they don't tell you is, although broken when with another, the heart will shatter when without them.

Oh, this is the beat of my heart, this is the beat of my heart

The look Zoro gives you is one saying his heart was shattered all along, yet you cannot tell. You only have eyes for his friend. He looks away, unable to reach your heart.

He knows you love Sanji.

He wants you to be happy.

This is gospel for the vagabonds,
Ne'er-do-wells and insufferable bastards

"Go, be happy," were the last words the violinist had spoken to you.

You should have known it was a goodbye.

"I want you to be happy."

Zoro kept fooling himself with those words.

"I want you to be happy."

Confessing their apostasies
Led away by imperfect impostors

Oh, this is the beat of my heart, this is the beat of my heart

The one who says goodbye hurts the most. That's what they say. As if letting you go would change anything. Love lives on.

I love you.

You'd whispered this phrase into the Sanji's ear several times. While he was sleeping, or sick, or compromised. He never heard you. He never acknowledged your quiet affection or alone cries for help.

You wondered how someone could be so oblivious.

Zoro wondered the same thing.

Don't try to sleep through the end of the world
And bury me alive
'Cause I won't give up without a fight

"I need you," the swordsman had whispered one time, thinking you were sleeping.

You had heard him, and the thought that he had hidden feelings crossed your mind.

You shook if off. As if it were a small fling, a simple slip of the tongue. You had been camping, and the way he'd embraced you as the two of you lie sleep, small whisperings of your name fading away from his lips in his sleep.

You only had eyes for the singer.

How selfish love was.

And you knew-or perhaps you thought you did-that you weren't any more than a friend to Zoro. You didn't want to believe the truth, so you didn't. He didn't want you to believe the blatant slips either.

If so, you'd think differently.

You'd judge him.

He'd have to hear those horrible words.

"I'm sorry."

The violinist refused to let you know.

"I want you to be happy."

If you love me let me go
If you love me let me go

'Cause these words are knives and often leave scars

You and Sanji were so happy. What happened? Why did he let you go? Why did you push yourself away? Why did he let you?

Why couldn't you just be happy?

The fear of falling apart
And truth be told, I never was yours
The fear, the fear of falling apart

The words of his magnificent voice cleared your mind completely.

Was that it? He held you so close, but men like him could hurt you. You were too hurt to keep. And you would never admit it.

You would never admit all of those times you wanted to cry in his arms and then rip those same limbs off for holding another woman's tears. You would never admit all of the horrible things he did when he wasn't cherishing you, you wouldn't admit it to him, to anyone.

It would be suppressed inside of you, ready to leave only when your next fight would arise.

Oh, the fear of falling apart
Oh, the fear, the fear of falling apart

You took comfort during the hard times with the violinist instead. The two of you could laugh, and you could feel free. You knew he was open, and wasn't hiding anything. He would always be there for you.

You loved his bravery and friendship.

He loved only you.

This is the beat of my heart, this is the beat of my heart

The song slowly made it's end.

The fear of falling apart

The rain didn't stop, nor did your tears. You turned away, back into your shop, trying to figure out where the two would play at next. This was always the first–the first performance was always in front of your shop.

You loved Sanji.

He loved you.

Why couldn't that be enough?

You laughed dryly through your tears, yet no one heard. The answer to that was obvious.

You weren't alive anymore.

All of the looks the singer gave you were directionless. You could see him clearly, yet he saw no traces of you. He began putting his microphone in his bag, and your heart shook.

Why is the world so cruel?

His hands were shaking. Sanji bent down to put his materials away.

Then he snapped.

The bag crashed to the floor, along with the blond, who slammed to his knees. His fall roared through the town, cities away. He would always reach you.

You would never reach him.

"I love you.." you whispered, placing your hand on his shoulder. You couldn't feel him. Your hand slapped the air.

Zoro stood tall, yet was breaking inside. Tears clouded his vision, and his only thoughts are of you. His only dreams are of you.

Sanji eventually broke down, erupting into screams and painful sobs. You couldn't look away from his suffering, yet Zoro cast his eyes astray.

"I love you," you said, a little louder. You wouldn't stop until Sanji heard you.

"I love you!"

You fist shook in the loud rain. Tears were unrecognizable from rain.

"I LOVE YOU!"

"I love you..!!" you sobbed.

The ground acted as your safeguard as the two of you fell apart. Zoro looked away, his own grief suppressed so long it wouldn't come out.

The swordsman looked to the sky with tears in his own eyes.

I love you..

Three simple words I didn't have the courage to say. And I never will.

Zoro didn't regret not telling you. He knew it would put too much of a burden on you. Tears fell down his face as he stared at the sky.

Because, somewhere, I know you're looking down on him. And that means there's a chance you'll notice me.

A smile caught Zoro's lips, though you didn't notice. He wiped his tears away.

I love you.

And I hope you will never find out.

Because I want you to be happy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~simswimsbob