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All of the Knights of Ren were summoned to the main bridge. Where a meeting took place about a coming attack on a rebel base.
An hour later we were all dismissed as Phasma approached you.
"Would you deliver this to Commander Ren for me I have to go upstairs," she said dreadfully.
"Sure, that's no problem," you said as kindly as you could but then turned around glaring at the folder. You really weren't in the mood to see Kylo tonight.

As of today it was the one year anniversary of you escaping your parents who wore you down everyday verbally. They were some of the worst people you had ever met, and were rather lucky to run into the first order. The topic occupied your mind filling all of your thoughts with the terrible things they used to say to you. It was as if you could hear them bickering about you right here in this hallway as if it were yesterday. You threw your hood on and kept walking down the staircase in front of you as your mind drifted back to your childhood.
***
"You never do anything and don't say all of the chores I've given you because those are things I've asked you to do! No dinner tonight for you, you need to lose a few pounds anyways!"
You silently walked to your room closing the door behind you and slumping down against it. You cried quietly into your hands wanting only to be rid of your parents. You were always kind to them and yet you knew that you would never be the daughter that they wanted you to be. You would never be good enough for them.
***
Taking the last step you turned right seeing his office door in front of you which was closed.
You walked down the hallway as the door slid open you kept your eyes down and walked straight to his desk setting down the file on top of a folder. You turned around quickly heading back from where you came.

"Too busy to speak with your superior," he said as he looked at the file you placed on his desk from around the corner. But you took another step toward the door. He frowned at your back, raising his hand as you froze unable to move except for your head.
"Is something bothering you," he asked in a low concerning voice that made you shiver.
You shook your head no keeping your hood on.
"It's nothing Commander," you said quietly.
"I'll be the judge of that," he stepped around you facing you now although he still towered over you.
"Are we doing this the easy way or the hard way,"
You lowered your chin toward the ground. As his heart dropped and felt as though it were shattering into a thousand pieces for you seeing that something had really taken a toll on your mind. He was awe stricken because you never showed emotion in public so this must have been something serious. He rose his right hand and placed it softly on your left temple,
"I'll be gentle," he reassured as you twitched. You had seen him do this to prisoners before watching them writhe in pain and even collapsing in the process. You could sense that he was going through your mind it wasn't complete pain but more of little sharp pains every few seconds but it felt like hours. His eyes widened as he heard voices in your head echoing loudly there was a male who said "not good enough," and a female who kept repeating the word 'failure,' loudly over and over again. He was saddened by all of these thoughts that roamed through your mind and was curious as to how they got there in the first place. You whimpered a little again as he stopped his searching through your mind lowering his hand remembering that he didn't want to hurt you.
He let go of his hold on you as you walked out of his office and towards your room not looking him in the eyes.
***
1 AM

You had taken a shower and picked up a book as you sat against the wall turning through the pages. You picked up your glass taking a drink of the icy water. Then you heard a knock on the door setting the book in your lap. The door slid open Kylo walked in. He paced a little tapping his leg with his hand before completely coming through the doorway. You glanced up at him as he stood there silently looking down at you. You looked back to your book and turned the page hoping that he would understand that you didn't want to talk. But he knelt down in front of you, you met the eye slits of his metal face emotionless to the situation. His head dropped to his chest and you grew a little worried that he was worn down. He lifted both of his hands as he removed his mask from his head dropping it next to him with a loud thud. You looked down at it tracing the divots with your index finger. But his head was still just hanging down.
He sniffled a little bringing a hand up to his eye and wiping it off. Then he finally met your gaze just with his human complexion. His cheeks were stained and his eyes were red from the tears running down his chin. You looked at him sadly not sure what could have upset him so terribly. You wanted to ask him if he was ok but you couldn't bring yourself to speak. You just swayed some of his hair to it's proper place from his forehead and smiled gingerly at his saddened expression.
"You're always going to be good enough for me," he said quietly in his coaxing voice. Your eyes widened as you realized that what he had found in your mind had bothered him so much. He shifted over next to you on the wall as you placed a tissue box in his lap and the glass of water in his hand. He looked down at everything you had given him and smiled to himself as you went back to your book.

After that night he never wore the mask again and it stayed on a shelf in your room because you liked looking at it.