SPOILERS \/
For the sake of his one shot; Civil War hasn't taken place but the death of Peggy Carter has.

Steve finds out that Tony and Peggy has had a past with one another, and it's not in the way that Steve thinks it is.

While growing up, Tony has had only a hand few of role models in his life. At a young age, he admired his Father, he was Intelligent, charming, gifted, everything that a young Anthony dreamed of becoming when he grew up. Of course, as the years carried on he realised that despite his father being intelligent and a gifted craftsman, he was far from the facade of being charming. Like every human, Howard had his flaws; his alcoholism one of them. And a major flaw of his; Tony.

Tony had admired his Mother, Maria Stark, as the beautiful, smart and humble woman that he remembers her to be, before the alcohol, and the addiction. Tony could see no fault, she had fell in love with a man who wanted her for nothing more than a trophy wife, someone to corrupt. Tony had admired Jarvis, and quiet frankly he still does admire the man for everything that he was, for being a prime example that behind every rain cloud came a rainbow.

Peggy Carter was something else though, a young Tony had looked up to her as if she hung the moon in the sky, was the reason why the earth turned and the birds sang. She was his role model, he wanted to be everything that Peggy Carter was, from kicking ass to being able to keep her make up on point. He wanted to be caring like she was, funny like she was, always willing to look under his bed for monsters or be there to bring him donuts.

He had grew up with her stories, of the war, missions - even if she wants supposed to tell him that, Tony knew how to keep secrets -, of Steve. He grew up with her swooning over Captain America, telling him how she had kicked ass and how even at times. As the years went on, Tony began to see less of his Aunt Peggy, and that was okay because Tony was growing up, he was taking off those rose tinted glasses that Peggy had put on him years before and finally seeing the world as it was.

After the death of his Parents, Tony didn't see much of Peggy anymore. She moved to Washington and that was okay, Tony told himself that was okay because she needed to make a life of her own and so did Tony. Tony didn't need her, he wasn't a child anymore and Peggy was not his mother.

It was years after that he saw her again, face to face. They had contacted one another, phoned each other and sent letters - as often as Tony would reply, which sometimes was not a lot - and by then, Tony could already see the creeping signs of Alzheimer.

The last time Tony had seen his Aunt Peggy...It wasn't a pleasant experience. Tony has labelled it as The Incident in his mind, one he wishes he would wash over and replace with a different memory. Peggy had mistaken Tony as Howard, screamed at him for the way he had treated poor little Tony, screamed at him to get our, clawed at Tony's arm and it was only when a nurse had to sedate her, did Tony finally force himself to leave with tears in his eyes.

She wasn't his Aunt Peggy anymore.

"You knew her?"By the time Steve came along, it was evident that Tony's visits to Peggy Carter were not welcomed anymore, and that was okay, Tony had always knew deep down in his heart that he was nothing more than an object to fill the hole in Peggy Carters heart after the lost of her 'Not really my boyfriend but was still my boyfriend'.

Tony had tried his best not to bring Peggy Carter up while around Steve, just as much as Steve tried his best not to mention Howard Stark, but both slipped up sometimes, and all humans do. Sometimes, however, other days were worse than others. As much as Tony tried to keep his relationship with Peggy Carter a secret, there were always going to be ways that one would find out.

"You knew her?"Steve asks louder, his tone more demanding than asking. Tony keeps his back to his super solider boyfriend, keeping his eyes focused on the wires of a prototype shell of a suit. After the last battle, it came to Tony's attention that he needed an upgrade, something about giant spiders spitting acid that was melting away at his currant armour, and something else about having eyes at the back of his head.

Keeping the fact he grew up with Peggy by his side from Steve was harder than Tony thought it would be, especially while being Steve Rogers boyfriend. As much as Steve knows that Tony is a busy man, a workaholic at that and in some cases, a loner, Steve had a wonderful power of knowing exactly when Tony was lying and knowing exactly where Tony was. It doesn't help facts that JARVIS is the worlds biggest Taddle-Tail.

"J, did I say that Steve had permission to enter the workshop?"Tony speaks, toying with the wires.

"Apologies Sir, but Captain Rogers has full access to the workshop at all times due to Emergency protocols."JARVIS informs.

"Since when?"

"Since the Start of your relationship with Captain Rogers, Sir. Also on the list are; Agent Coulson, Ms Potts and Lieutenant Colonel Rhodes."

"Right. Later, play footage of when I made this list."Tony waves Jarvis off with a wave of his hand, eyebrows scrunched up on his forehead in confusion. He doesn't remember making such a list, and maybe that was one night he was feeling extremely bad, had a blank out of some sort and made a list of people he trusted just incase. Of course, in the haze he was in, he had added a dead man to the list, but it's a comfort.

Tony almost forgets of the extra person in the room, ready to settle back into his work because he's only been on a workshop binge for...14 hours, which by Tony's standards is poor.

"Don't ignore me, Tony."Steve snaps, making Tony jump back to the reality that Steve is in the Workshop, angry at him.

"Who do I know? I know a lot of people, the least you could do is tone it down."

"You know damn well who I'm talking about, Stark."And ouch, the Stark card is a low blow. Tony has grown use to the way that Steve can let the name Tony roll off his tongue, it comes out buttery. Stark is too harsh, too full of negative emotion. Tony's back is stiffened, tense throughout his whole body as he just stares at the shell of his suit, unsure of what to do or what to say."Did you know Peggy Carter?"

"What does it matter if I did or did not?"Tony says, flicking off his safety goggles, throwing them at a metal tray. He misses, sending the goggles to crash on the floor of the workshop and for DUMM-E to whirl to collect the forgotten mess.

"So you knew her? And didn't tell me?"Steve fumes, taking closer steps towards the man whose back is still turned. Tony has full access to the suits that line his walls of his newly built California home, ready to protect the man at all costs if the time comes to doing so.

"I didn't see how it was any of your concern that I had connections to Peggy Carter. She was a woman, one from my past and I saw no need to bring it up while in your presence simply because it was salt on open wounds."And Okay, maybe Tony could've worded it a lot better, but Tony Stark isn't good with people, or with words. Period.

"Wait one second."Steve holds up a hand, closing his eyes to sort of calm himself down. Steve is a walking hormone, simply because the past month has been an emotional roller coaster of depression hitting him clean in the face and having this spring onto him doesn't help one bit. Peggy's Death was up coming, he saw it happening, but it didn't make it any less painful."Are you tell me that you slept with my gal?"

"Slept with her?!"That's enough to make Tony whirl on the spot so fast that it makes him dizzy, his jaw clenching in anger at Steve is even implying that Tony had slept with Peggy."Do you think that fucking low of me that I would sleep with someone the same age as my own fucking mother at the time?"

Tony has to add 'at the time' before he forgot,

"I know your past, it wouldn't have surprised me!"

"My past! You told me when you entered this damn relationship that you would Not compare anything that we have to the past! And what are you doing right now? Fucking implying that I slept with your 'Gal'."Tony throws his arms up in the air."What's next, hmm? That I rode the fucking Winter Soldiers Dick after he killed my parents?"

"Can you blame me for being mad? She was my gal, Tony! She was the only living human of my time, and to find out that you knew her, that you probably slept with her-"

"I didn't fucking sleep with her! Peggy Carter was my fucking role model, my Guardian, my Aunt, alright? Is that what you want to hear? That I knew Peggy god damn Carter and y'know what? Sometimes I wish I didn't know her, because then I wouldn't have to live with the fucking pain of knowing that she forgot I existed, that she's gone and I'm never going to be able to see her again."

"Ton-"

"What do you want from me Steve? To sit around a god damn table and talk about her? Do you want to hear all the fucking stories she told me while I was shitting my pants scared of a thunderstorm outside? Or the way her perfume smelt? How it was one of the inky comforts that I had as a child? Or that time she tried to take me away from Howard and then she never came back again?"

Tony can feel the tears building up in his eyes as he stands there, his arms by his side and jaw clenched. He's not going to wuss out, not after years of being able to keep a straight face every time the mention of Peggy Carter had echoed through the vents of Avengers Tower, or everytime that Steve would remind him that it was Peggy's birthday, on his way to pay her a visit.

Steve looks away from Tony, unable to bring himself to look his boyfriend in the eye. Steve anger has flattered, sinking into a guilt feeling in the pit of his stomach instead as he watches the way that Tony slumps backwards onto his workshop bench, hands pressed to the bench and head tipped down to his chest.

"There's a lot of reasons why I didn't tell you that I knew Peggy Carter, Steve. Believe me, I would've if I knew that it wouldn't have hurt your feelings, to make you feel the blame."Tony continues, watching his chest rise and fall with every heavy breath that he takes."She meant a lot to me, y'know? An adult that I could, and did, look up at as a child. Howard was a dick, my mom was a mess. I knew she loved me too, it was a hard word for her so I barely heard her say it, but she did."

"But?"Steve asks quietly just to prompt Tony on after a moment of silence. He's Afraid to speak in case his big mouth goes onto another rant of accusing Tony of another.

"She loved you more."Tony almost spits the words out as if venom but Steve takes no offence."It was a different love, of course, but it didn't hurt any less to know that you always had a bigger place in her heart, and the place that I was in was taken by her husband, and then later her children. I was something to fill the void, for a long time. Someone to dote over when time were getting to rough and she was thinking about you too much."

"Tony, that isn't true. She loved you a lot."Steve breathes out, finally looking over at Tony with gentleness all over his face.

"She talked about you, a lot."Tony lets out a bitter laugh, running over Steves words."How much of a hero that you were, and I get that, you were and you still are. She would tell me the stories you told her about the war, or how you couldn't dance. She told me how you were coming back, y'know. Almost as crazed as Howard about finding you. Telling me you were going to come back, that you were going to take us both away somewhere safe, away from Howard and S.H.I.E.L.D."

"Why didn't you tell me all this, Tony?"Steve asks, still feeling lost.

"Because she was all that you had, and I didn't want to take that away from you."Tony whispers, looking up at Steve. His eyes shine with unshed tears."You had just woke up after 70 years of being claimed dead, with everyone you ever known as either dead or dying. You deserved to have Peggy. And by then, she hasn't a clue who I was. I wasn't young Anthony anymore, I was Howard to her. But you, she always remembered you."

"I loved her,"Steve whispers.

"I know,"Tony gives him a sad smile.

"But I love you."

Idk I just wanted to end it here bc I can't be bothered to write any more. I think I'm going to have a follow up chapter sometime

Please tell me what you thought!!