Chapter 62

Miguel Falcon

"What..? You'll fight me?" the boy laughed and his friends shook their heads in mockery. "You're such a loser!"

I silently clenched my fist.

Imbes na patulan siya, mas pinili ko na lang kunin 'yung headphones kong hinulog niya sa sahig. We are just in 1st grade but these kids already keep bullying me.

"Now, I know why even at the school fair-you're parents won't show! They are both embarrassed to have a weak child like you.." And that's where all of my patience runs off, almost immediately; I face him.

"Come again?"

He smirked at me.

"What? It's true right-" In just a snap, sumalubong sa kanya ang kamao ko. Pinatungan ko siya para hindi na siya makawala. Pinalibutan naman kami ng mga kasama niya.

"Stand up, Aaron! Punch him!"

"Laban! Laban!"

Hindi ko siya tinigilan. Ang maliit na kamay ko ay marahas na nakahawak sa kanya. Buong lakas ko siyang pinagsusuntok. I want to teach this kid a lesson.

"What is happening here?!" Dumating ang teacher namin. Galit ang mga mata niya nang paghiwalayin niya kami.

"What are doing Miguel!" Inalalayan niya si Aaron at napailing na lang ako.

"Hey.. Are you okay?" Napatingin ako sa likuran ko. It's Trezer. Hindi ko siya pinansin.

"He starts the fight ma'am.." I rolled my eyes when I heard them talk.

"Makakarating ito sa parents mo, Miguel. You shouldn't be bullying your classmate!" Hindi ko siya kinibo. Instead na magpaliwanag din sa kanya, iniwanan ko sila roon.

No one will believe me anyway, so bakit ko pa susubukang sabihin 'yung side ko?

"Young master, what happened?" Binuksan ko ang pintuan ng sasakyan at naupo sa backseat.

"I want to go home.." I murmured and he quietly nodded. As our family driver started to manoeuvre the car, I glanced at my headphones. Sira na naman ito and it's Aaron's fault. Kaylan niya ba ako titigilan? I didn't do anything wrong to him but he just keeps pestering me and it frustrates me.

"We're here.." Tahimik akong lumabas ng sasakyan. Walang gana akong pumasok sa bahay. Hindi na ako nagulat pa nang wala akong marinig manlang na ingay sa loob.

This may be a mansion, but I feel like.. no one is also living here. It is always so quiet.

"Miguel?" Nahinto ako nang makita si manang.

"Where's mom and dad?" Kahit alam ko na ang sagot ay naging pagtanong ko.

"Ma'am Eliza went somewhere and Mr. Falcon as usual is still in the company." Humigpit ang hawak ko sa bag ko. "It's still your school hour Miguel, pero bakit ka nandito agad?"

"I got bored.." Nagsalubong lang ang kilay niya. Nagtuloy-tuloy naman ako sa paglalakad. I think I should just sleep. Even at a young age, I feel so tired already. If I just can kill myself, I will.

"Stop seeing that guy, Eliza. I am telling you, you won't like it when you make me mad." Hindi sumisigaw si dad pero ramdam ko ang galit niya.

"I can do whatever I want Mike! Stop controlling me like Dad!"

"We are fucking married and you're a grown woman, yet you're acting like a child!" He glared at her. Mas lalo naman akong naestatwa rito sa kusina.

"You're an asshole you know?! We just marry each other because of an agreement for Pete's sake!" I sighed as I tried to close my ears. They just can't stop yelling at each other.

It's another morning.. I was having breakfast alone here at the counter and my parents were in the living area. Never kaming nagsabay-sabay sa pagkain. Kapag sumisikat na kase ang araw, naghahanda na agad si dad sa pagpasok habang si mom palaging abala sa cellphone niya.

"Can't you understand?!" Dad holds his waist angrily. "When the press hears that you're having an affair, my image will be ruined!"

"Come on! Stop being innocent. People are not blind. We all know that you also have a mistress!"

"A mistress that I can keep and protect!"

"I can also keep my man in myself! No one will know if you won't be this nosy!"

"Shut up, Eliza! I am tired of hearing your bullshit." Natahimik si mom. Itinigil ko ang pagkain at sinilip muli sila. "Fix yourself, I am warning you." Binangga siya ni dad. Napaupo naman si mom sa sofa dahil sa pwersa no'n.

Toxic..

Napailing ako.

Nawalan na ako ng gana sa pagkain kaya tumayo na ako. Pero hindi ko napansin 'yung baso kaya nabangga ko ito. Nagkalat ang bubog sa sahig at napalingon si mom sa kusina. Wala na si dad at mukhang nakaalis na.

"Miguel come here.." Kalmado si mom nang tawagin ako.

"Ako na bahala rito ijo.." Lumabas si manang sa laundry room. Mukhang narinig 'yung nabasag na baso.

Tumango ako at nagtungo na kay mom. I know that just like Dad, she's obvious na nasa kusina ako at naririnig ang pag-aaway nila. But I guess.. They just didn't care. Hindi ko pinansin ang paninikit ng dibdib ko. Dapat masanay na ako. Simula nang magkaisip ako, palagi na lang ganito.

"H-hi Mom.." I whispered. I can't help but be timid in front of her. My mom never approached me willingly.

"Your teacher called me yesterday." malamig na sabi niya. "Why did you do that?"

Umiwas ako ng tingin.

"I.."

"You always bring trouble just like your father." patuloy niya. "Why don't you just act like Trezer? That kid is smart enough to behave."

Napayuko na ako.

Si Trezer na naman..

"I didn't start it, Mom." giit ko sa kanya.

"And I don't care, Miguel. Hindi alam ng dad mo 'yung nangyare, but once he hears it.. you know what will happen." I gulped, stopping myself from crying. Dad's punishment is heavy enough to scare me..

"M-Mom.." ang tanging nasabi ko na lamang. Hindi na siya nagsalita pa. Tumayo siya at iniwanan ako sa sala.

I blinked, and a dejected tear escaped through my eyes.

My heart hurts.

My parents didn't love me.

They never showed an interest in their only child.

"W-why.." I breathed out, watching how my mom left my sight.

I'm such a lonely, broken boy. I won't even blame myself if I become needy and greedy in the future if someone shows affection to me. Since I was born, I never felt wanted. My own parents made me feel unwanted, yet there's still part of me that was hoping-that someday, their loathsome treatment of me could also change.

"Kid watch out!" Nangunot ang noo ko. Titignan ko sana kung saan nanggaling ang boses na 'yon nang hilahin na ako ng isang braso at kasunod no'n ay ang pagbagsak ng mannequin sa harapan ko.

"Did you get hurt?" Sinuri ako ng estrangherong lalaking ito. Ang asul niyang mga mata ay tinitigan ako. "I.. I'm okay. Thanks."

"Where are your parents? Naligaw ka ba?" tanong niya. Umiling naman ako. Nilingon ko 'yung spa na pinasukan ni mom. Ang sabi niya may babalikan lang siya sa loob kaya naghihintay ako sa kanya sa labas.

"You are waiting for your mom?" I nod my head. "Women.. They always took so long to finish something." For some reason, it made me also chuckle.

"Miguel..?" Nang marinig ko na ang boses ni mom, lumingon ako sa kung nasaan siya. Ganun din ang ginawa ng lalaking nasa gilid ko.

"Elizabeth.." He looks oddly surprised to see my mom.

"V-Vinz.." Now, I know that they seriously know each other. Tahimik ko silang pinanonood at mas nagkatitigan sila.

"Uh.. mom?" Lumapit ako sa kanya. Napunta naman sa akin ang atensyon nilang dalawa.

"I see.." The man cleared his throat. "I guess.. He's your son?"

"By need, yes." My face fell, hearing how my mom emphasised her answer. Bahagya akong napalayo sa kanya. I suddenly feel humiliated.

"Eliza!" Mukhang gaya ko ay hindi nagustuhan ng kausap ni mom 'yung sinabi niya. Nag-aalala ako nitong tinignan at halos hindi naman ako makatingin sa kanya.

Why, Mom?

"I'm just telling the truth." she shrugged and my breath became uneven. Hindi tinanggap nung lalaki 'yung rason niya at pinantayan ako.

"I'm jealous. You're such a handsome kid." he smiles and I don't know how to react anymore. He seems nice, but why did he know my mom?

Mula nung araw na 'yon naging sunod-sunod palagi ang pagkikita namin ni Vinz, but I prefer to call him by his first name which is Brixxon. He's a great guy. I have no clue what is his relationship with my mom, but I can feel it; there's indeed something to him. My mom always left no choice but to somehow consider my presence when I was with them. She just can't say no to him and it kinda amuses me.

"Brix.. If you don't mind, I want to ask something." Dad is not at home and I invited him here in the house.

"What is it?" Itinigil niya ang pag-assemble ng skateboard ko.

"What is mom to you?" Nagtama ang mga mata namin pagkatingin niya sa akin. Although he looks stunned, he answers. "I love her."

"Why?" I raised an eyebrow.

"We are each other's first love."

"Oh.." Now, I get everything. He's my mom's lover and that realization just woke me up to the reality; I can't really have a family. My parents didn't love each other. They are cheating while they are in a marriage.

"Did.. Did my mom still love you until now?"

"Yes." He sighed and I became more serious.

"I-I'm curious, Brix.." Naging mahina ang boses ko. "How does it feel to be loved by mom?"

"Miguel.."

"Did she cook food to comfort you? Did she hug you when you're sad? Is she showing her smile and laugh when she's with you?" I softly muttered. "M-Mom is always distant to me and I.. I was wondering how it feels to be loved by her, Brix."

Natahimik siya. Bumuka ang bibig niya para magsalita pero hindi iyon natutuloy. Parang natulala na lang siya sa akin.

"But anyways.. if you love her and she loves you, please always make her happy." I forced a smile. Hindi ako kumurap sa kanya. I want him to take my words seriously. "Take care of my mom, Brix. I trust you with her."

"I will, kid. I will-" Pareho kaming napatingin sa gilid nang may marinig kaming nahulog. Nagkalat ang popcorn sa carpet. Napaangat ang tingin ko kay mom na hindi ko namalayang bumalik na pala sa sala.

"M-Miguel.." Her eyes are full of tears while looking at me and it confused me. "I.."

I think she heard what I said to her man! This is embarrassing.. Wala sa sariling napatayo ako at napatakbo. Umakyat agad ako sa hagdan. Narinig ko naman ang pagtawag nila sa akin pero hindi na ako lumingon pa. Isinarado ko ang pintuan ng kwarto. I can't just face her.. If Brix makes her happy, I won't tell Dad. Gusto kong mabawasan kahit papaano 'yung galit niya sa akin.

"Miguel, are you really sure that you don't know where your mom is?" I clenched my small fist. Dalawang araw ng 'di umuuwi si mom. At first, hindi 'yon napapansin ni dad pero kalaunan ay pinuna na niya.

"I am talking to you, young man." Hinampas niya 'yung desk at napaigtad ako. We are in his office. Kahit nasa bahay ay nagtatrabaho siya kaya may customize room para sa workplace niya.

"I-I didn't know, Dad."

"You're stuttering." Naningkit ang mga mata niya. "Are you lying to me?!"

"No, sir." I quickly answered.

"If I found out that you're fooling me, you won't like my punishment this time Miguel. You're dismissed." Nang makaalis na ako sa opisina niya, doon lang ako nakahinga nang maluwag.

I need to call Mom! With that, I hurriedly went to my room and hid in my closet. Kinausap ko siya at sinabi kong pinapahanap na siya ni dad.

"I'll go home too.." she whispered. "T-thank you, son." I can't help but grin. Finally! I wanted to cry with happiness when I heard the last word.

"I-I love you, mom." I didn't hesitate to tell her and she became awfully quiet. Pero hindi ko na iyon pinansin. She actually didn't need to respond, so before pa siya makapagsalita-pinatay ko na ang tawag.

Malawak ang ngiti akong lumabas sa closet ko.

Pinunasan ko ang pawis sa noo ko. Masyadong kulob at mainit doon.

"Son.." Naestatwa ako. Kumabog ang dibdib ko. Dahan-dahan akong napalingon sa taong nakaupo sa kama ko. "D-Dad.."

"You know what I despised the most?" He's so calm and my lips parted. Dad is more dangerous when he's not yelling. "I hate a traitor, Miguel."

"D-Dad.. I-"

"Shut the fuck up!" In just a blink of an eye, sinasakal niya na ako. Napahawak ako sa braso niya para kumawala.

"I-I can't b-breath.."

"I will make sure that you will learn your fucking lesson, child!" Nanlabo ang paningin ko. Sobrang naninikip ang dibdib ko. Wala ng pumapasok na hangin sa katawan ko. Sinubukan kong pumalag sa kanya pero masyado siyang malakas.

"D-dad-p..lease," But he didn't listen. His eyes are so dark. He keeps choking me and I feel like passing out in a few seconds. As I slowly closed my eyes, I sobbed, I couldn't take it.. anymore.

"Never betray me again, Miguel!" Ayan na lamang ang patuloy kong naririnig hanggang sa tuluyan na akong sakupin ng dilim.

If I die today, I won't regret everything. Protecting my mom is worth it.

"Open the door, Mike! Let me see my son!" Nagising ako nang may patuloy na kumakalabog sa pintuan.

"M-Mom.." Nabuhayan ako ng pag-asa. Gumalaw ako pero pinigilan ako ng posas ni dad. Nakakabit ang dalawang posas sa dulo ng kama at kahit na anong pilit ko, hindi ito matanggal.

"It's not called punishment for nothing, Eliza!"

"Shut up asshole! I want to see Miguel!"

Namasa ang mga mata ko.

Tinignan ko ang basag na salamin ng closet ko. Nakita ko rito kahit papaano ang repleksyon ko. I look.. ugly. I have so many bruises in my body and I have a very dark black eye.

Ilang araw na ba akong nakakulong sa kwarto?

"Eliza!" Napunta ang atensyon ko sa pintuan nang bigla itong bumukas. Bumungad dito si mom at tuluyan na akong napaluha.

"M-Mom.."

"Oh, my God.." Nanginginig ang mga kamay na nilapitan niya ako. "Miguel.."

"M-Mommy.." I cried. My tears keep dropping down my cheeks. Hawak ang susi ay tinanggal niya ang pagka-lock nung posas. Nang makawala na ako ay walang pag-aatubiling niyakap ako ni mom. Kinulong niya ako sa bisig niya.

"I'm sorry, son.. I'm sorry. You didn't deserve this." She's crying too and my heart ached. I can feel it, she's worried to me.

"I.. I love you, Mom, but it hurts so much."

"Mommy is here.. I'm here, love." Napayakap ako pabalik sa kanya.

Ipinikit ko ang mga mata ko.

I'm physically in pain yet her soothing voice somehow heals me.

I am finally experiencing my mother's love?

L A D Y M | MOONWORTH