Note: Welcome back to another installment. This was supposed to be a separate oneshot, but I decided I wanted this to be in this series.

* Kotoko Saga is her canon name, I had to rewatch the final episode of season 2 to find that out.

I do not own. Enjoy!

***************

The life of Saga Masamune could have been summed up with one word. Monotonous.

The world behind his amber irises was dyed gray, nothing seemed to evoke excitement or any positive emotion out of him. Every facial expression, every external emotion that was ever shown to an unsuspicious person was calculated. Making sure no one ever attempts to find the keys to his internal struggles, no one ever finds out his bitter altered ego.

Beneath his indifferent mask laid a taciturn and cynical teenager as the result of his parents. His father was relatively distant and a cold-hearted man. His actions showed he thought he was a nuisance, a mosquito that lingered throughout the too-large house. They were just on completely different wavelengths, there was absolutely nothing to talk about in the few mornings spent in the house.

They were "biologically" related but it was as though they were strangers. The normal father-son relationship was non-existent, all those years that could have been spent bonding was spent in intense arguments with his mother *Kotoko.

While their relationship wasn't the worst, their occasional talks in the morning were curt and to the point. Typically discussing her court cases or Saga's extended family -mainly his grandfather- Those were admittedly pleasant at times. Their relationship was miles better than his father but it wasn't what made him resent both his parents.

It was the emotional neglect, while they provided him money for food and other expenses, their almost daily screaming matches about the sinking ship that was their marriage just drove him up the wall. From what he was able to gather, infidelity was at the forefront of those arguments with a multitude of other issues ranging from alcohol to who was the better parent to their son.

One was cold and the other was curt. None of which he had grown to love and respect as a mother or a father, and that combined with their professions made family time practically non-existent. On the surface, the three seemed to uphold the average wealthy family but beneath the act was a family that was falling apart at the seams.

School was one of the ways Saga could escape from his suffocating household. His schoolwork -while admittedly boring- helped him take his mind off his crumbling home.

Socializing with others was just a chore so friendships were a rarity. It wasn't as though Saga thought he was above his peers, there just wasn't any point in making and maintaining friends. He feared seeing someone so happy, he thought it would further highlight his cynicism and his flaws and it disgusted him more than words could describe. His disposition remained morose at all times. His indignation towards his peers would never cease. It was just a part of him.

His fundamental and pernicious belief was kindness was simply transactional. You would do or merely give someone something, whether it'd be a favor or give someone an item for nothing in return. Saga exposed it to be a pointless endeavor but then again there were many things Saga found to be pointless. So like a normal person, he simply turned away from it only for him to be living in his bleak bubble.

There was no such thing as a genuine person, someone who was upfront with their pure-hearted intentions. Friends were merely temporary, they would never last whether it'd be for a week or years they would eventually fade away from his life. Like they were never in it to begin with. People would come in and out of his life, some were decent while others he was better off without, none of which were meant to last. Meaningful connections were pointless.

/GG/

It was another tiresome day of school, world history class went through one ear and out the other. The hands of the clock seemed to capture his interest, the ticking motions indicating seconds passing was quite calming. Saga could feel his heart attempting to beat in unison to the small hand of the clock. Only ten minutes needed to pass before he was free to head to the literary paradise that was the school library.

With his life at home, spending time at home was not an option. So until seven or eight, Saga would browse the shelves. Genres were not a problem. Romance, science fiction, historical, it was irrelevant as long as the storyline captivated him. Literature was another, more potent form of escapism. The way the plot developed with each shift of his gaze, the decisions made by the protagonist -whether good or idiotic- supplied his brain with its twists and turns, the many nuances held by the genres intrigued him. In their own unique way, they were all different whether it would be the twist made by the author, or how their style would turn it upside down.

What would happen to the protagonist? The way the author was able to weave and twist words to manifest visual scenes into paragraphs with beautiful imagery and sprinkled with the author's distinctive style. While he couldn't write to the level of those authors, he appreciated their works. Maybe he could try someday, apparently some people would write just to vent out their frustration, help compartmentalize trauma or help get over sadness or anger.

His thoughts were cut off by the bell ringing. The shuffling of feet and books filled the once silent room as the classroom emptied, Saga being one of the first. The empty halls were filled with students conversing with others, some excited for their elaborate plans for the weekend others just wanting to sleep for 2 days straight. It's pointless they're just going to leave. With a deep sigh, Saga pushed the doors open and the sight of those books bought a wave of relief to wash over him.

Bored amber eyes carefully examined the shelves, spines enticing him to pick them up and dive into whatever they had to offer, some of which had his fingers brushing up against the smooth material choosing whether or not he should indulge in the world they hold.

Saga found the books on the lower shelves usually held the lackluster stories and one-dimensional characters -well according to his standards- and so, Saga dragged his gaze towards one of the higher shelves which held novels of the romance variety.

A boy who from appearances looked to be an underclassman. Sharp emerald eyes were the first thing Saga noticed, they could have been mistaken for jewels. They were quite beautiful and complimented his light brown hair and bangs framing the side of his face. While he had a small face, his facial features were perfect for him especially with the school uniform he was wearing.

His calm face soon turned frustrated. His nimble fingers attempted to tip a book towards him to no avail. For some reason, Saga wanted to help him which was uncharacteristic of him. Taking a step forward, he gently grabbed the novel and gave it to the boy.

"You want this book right?" He asked, handing him the novel. He noticed his cheeks taking on a light red hue.

"A-ah yes. Thank you." The man offered him a bright smile and he wandered off to one of the tables to dive into the world held by the book. He turned back to the shelf, the hand that took the book shaking ever so slightly. The upperclassman's gaze was locked on to the guy who was completely immersed in the story not noticing a thing. He could feel his heart beat fast against his chest, his hands started to clam up as his thoughts started to fill up with the man.

/GG/

Who knew such an insignificant interaction could manifest such emotion out of him, it felt as though Saga was free-falling, the emotions that were evoked out of him was simply indescribable. It was addicting, he was like a drug and he wanted more and more and so it kicked off months and months of research.

Shelves were scanned meticulously, taking note of their overarching preferences. While they both favored different genres -it seemed as though he preferred fantasy whereas Saga preferred shoujo and horror- it was refreshing. They had some similarities while they had things that kept them different.

But judging from appearances, it seemed as though he had grown up in a somewhat wealthy home with doting parents by his side. He seemed happy with how his life was at the moment.

It also seemed he was the shy type boarding on passive, it was quite endearing though he masked it with annoyance whenever the thought crossed his mind. It confused him to no end, he hated those types of people. In reality he knew it was his own resentment poking its ugly head out, it was mainly for himself. Saga didn't want people to be subjected to even the fraction of what he experiences on a daily basis. But somewhere deep down, he wished he could swallow that pill and talk to him and get to know you. He was suffering withdrawal and he needed more of him and those feelings that came along with it.

Saga could see the nameless man walking out of the library waving politely to the librarian sorting through the new novels that came in that day. With his selection of books for the day, he walked up to the librarian to sign them out. Opening the books, the sign-out cards were out but the name below his own caught his eyes.

Onodera Ritsu

So that's his name huh? The thought made his heart dance within his chest. He signed his name below and walked out the library with a curt goodbye and a peculiar gate in his step. It felt as though they were closer as people, he could feel those emotions bubbling up inside of him. That feeling was finally satiated for the time being, but he knew sooner or later his desire for more was going to come back with full force.

How in the hell could he be feeling this way towards someone only 2 years his junior. Maybe he was simply confused. It certainly wasn't admiration nor did he think it was a romantic attraction towards him. Then what the hell was it then?! Saga ran a hand through his hair in a combination and mild frustration.

I just need more research. Many thoughts went through his head, some good others not so much. I just need to know.

/GG/

3 years had come and gone and he noticed his life was just a tad bit brighter with each passing day. Saga noticed he had found something to look forward to everyday.

But today was completely different.

As he was reaching up for another novel, he felt another hand on top of his own. His gaze shifted towards the owner of the hand and his amber eyes widened. Right in front of him was his sunshine. Those emerald eyes that he was completely enamoured with looked up at him in shock, their hands moved away from the shelf -much to Saga's dissatisfaction-

"O-oh I'm sorry! Were you wanting that novel?" He couldn't say anything. His ears were filled with the strong and fast drum of his heart, that feeling of free falling came back in full force. Saga's facade was starting to crumble at the seams exposing the feelings he held for the man all those years.

"No you take it Ritsu." His eyes widened at the slip up, the cracks in his mask were revealing the emotions that were properly locked away since he was a child.

Damn it why the hell did I say that? Oh god I fucked up.

Ritsu's cheeks flushed. "U-um excuse my rudeness but...how do you know my name?" Saga had many scenarios made up about their second meeting but this was most definitely at the bottom of the list.

His feelings were boiling inside of him. Saga could feel as though his heart was going to explode from the overload. Taking a deep breath, he had to let them out and put his feelings out there.

"I love you."

The words just came out without much thought, the silence that filled the area was suffocating. Just say something? Reject me, reciprocate. Just say something! He was completely scatterbrained

"Y-you want to go out with m-me?" Ritsu flustered face was incredibly disarming

He took a deep breath before answering his question. "Yeah I want to go out with you."

Saga could practically read Ritsu's mind. He wants to go out with me? We only spoke about 10 or so words to each other so how could he fall for me? He's obviously crazy.

"Um...I-I'll go out with you but what's your name?"

"I'm Saga Masamune" He replied and the underclassman smiled a smile that made one forget himself. They made their way to one of the tables opposite to one another. They spent the 3 hours before he would get kicked out getting to know each other, talking about miscellaneous things, completely absorbed in their conversations all the while, Saga was on cloud nine, he finally found the light at the end of the tunnel.

He had found his sunshine and he couldn't be happier.