Here comes goodbye, here comes the last time

Here comes the start of every sleepless night

The first of every tear I'm gonna cry.

-Rascal Flatts, "Here Comes Goodbye"

Tallahassee, Florida

Luke

I loaded the last box into the U-Haul Brooke and I had rented, and when I turned around, I saw Rachel leaning against Miles with tears running down her face.

"Oh, Rach," I said, going to her and wrapping her in a hug. "You're going to be fine, I promise. We will come visit, and you can always come to PCB."

She nodded against my shoulder and I released her from my grip. "I know. I'm just going to miss you guys."

"I know. We'll miss you too," I said. Rachel stepped away from us then to go to Brooke. I looked up at Miles, whose face was stony, like he was trying not to cry. "Are you okay, Miles?" I asked.

He shook his head once. "Don't ask me that, Luke," he murmured, "unless you want to see me cry."

"Aw, bro. Don't do that. I'm only going to be in Panama City," I said, trying to make him laugh, but his face just fell even further.

"You will be... I'm going to be in Missouri. Then God knows where else," he said, his voice low.

"But... you told Rachel that you'd have virtually no chance of being deployed," I said, my face twisting in confusion.

He sighed. "I did. And at the time, it was true... but Staff Sergeant Riggs called me yesterday, and told me the chances have gone up," he admitted, glancing at Rachel sideways.

"What? Why?"

"They're sending more and more troops over into Korea, and he foresees there being a need for engineers due to some of the crumbling facilities in the area," he muttered. "There's a bigger chance now that I'll be deployed."

I bit my lip. "Shit. When are you going to tell her?"

"I leave tomorrow... so I have to tell her tonight. I dread it," he said, exhaling hard.

I put my hand on his forearm. "Text me afterward if you need me, okay?"

"I will. I love you, bro. Be safe, okay? Take care of Brooke," he said, giving me a hug.

"Love you too. And it's not goodbye; it's see you later, right?"

He gave me a small smile. "Right."

I turned around to see Rachel giving Brooke one last hug as Brooke climbed into the U-Haul. I checked to make sure my car was safely attached to the back, climbed in the driver's side, and after giving Rachel and Miles one more wave, Brooke and I took off toward adulthood.

Miles

Rachel sighed heavily as she pulled her sundress over her head and replaced it with one of my FSU baseball t-shirts. She climbed into bed and was staring at the ceiling when I sat down on the bed next to her.

"You okay, babe?" I asked, my voice gentle.

She looked over at me and squeezed my hand. "Yeah. I'm good." She pulled herself up so she was sitting next to me. "I can't believe you fly out tomorrow. But I keep telling myself, 'It's only for 14 weeks,'" she said, glancing at me and smiling.

My heart sank and my stomach knotted up. How was I ever going to be able to look at her and tell her I broke my promise?

But how could I not tell her? That would be even more cruel.

So I took a deep breath and spoke. "I need to talk to you about that," I started, and her face immediately fell.

"What is it?" she asked, her voice full of trepidation.

"I talked to Riggs yesterday, and apparently, the situation overseas has changed," I started. She nodded and I kept going. "They're sending more and more troops over, and we're trying to help them rebuild... which obviously means - "

She cut me off. "They need engineers... right?" she asked warily.

I swallowed and nodded. "So the chance of getting deployed is a little higher than originally anticipated. BUT that doesn't mean it's going to happen, okay, babe?" I said, taking her hands in mine.

Tears fell down her cheeks as she shook her head. "Jesus, Miles... You said this wouldn't happen," she muttered, throwing the covers back and crawling out of bed. "You all but promised me!" Her voice climbed an octave, and I gritted my teeth.

"Rachel, I know this isn't what we wanted to hear, but I did tell you there was a chance of this happening. You can't be mad at me for this, babe," I said, trying really hard not to get angry.

She scoffed. "Really? I can't get mad at you for joining the Army when that was never part of the plan," she said, anger lacing her voice.

I stood up on the opposite side of the bed and crossed my arms over my chest. "Rachel. That isn't fair. You told me you were okay with this. Please don't do this. Not when we only have less a day left together," I pleaded, starting to step around to her side of the bed.

She put her hands up toward me, palms out. "No. Don't," she murmured, shaking her head and leaving the bedroom.

I heard her footsteps going down the hall and then the balcony door opened.

I sighed and flopped onto the bed on my back. Damnit, that didn't go over well.

Rachel

I flung myself into a chair on the balcony and put my head in my hands, my heart pounding.

How dare he tell me I can't get mad? I mean, it's not like he asked my permission before he applied for that job. It's not like he asked me if it was okay with me that he join the damn Army!

I dropped my hands and rolled my eyes. Of course he asked your permission. Of course he asked you if it was okay. He didn't swear into the Army without asking me... he may've applied for the job before talking to me, but that was when he thought it would be a civilian position.

Damnit, Rachel.

I had been a bitch.

He didn't deserve that. He had enough to worry about. I mean, yeah, I was staying here alone while he went to boot camp, but that was just the point - he was going to boot camp. He would be in a completely new world. Alone.

I had to make this right... and now.

I jumped out of my chair and flung the balcony door open, running right into Miles's chest.

"I'm sorry!" we both blurted at the same time.

We laughed and he brushed away the tear that had slid down my cheek. "You don't have to - " he started, but I put my finger to his lips.

"Yes. Yes I do. I'm sorry for snapping at you. You were right. I'm not mad at you, anyway, babe. I'm just dreading you leaving, and that emotion escaped as anger. And I'm not mad at you, baby, please... you have to know - "

But my rambling stopped when he put his hands on my waist, pulled me to him, and ran his hands down my back, fingertips grazing my spine. He rested his forehead on mine and I could feel his soft breath against my face.

"Stop talking, Rachel," he breathed.

I smirked. "Make me," I whispered, my lips barely brushing his.