~Chapter 18

Wowza suddenly I've gone up from 2.7K to 3K views in the last couple of days! Thank you all soooo much! So here's the update :D stay online as the next chapter will fingers crossed also be up tonight <3 

Ella x

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-Rose's POV 

All I can do is run. I run out of the school, and out into the town. I'm not sure where I'm going, but I know I can't go far because I've got to work later. I just need two get away, and be as far away from the Doctor as possible. I make it to the beach, and run down the stone path to the sand. It's cold, and the sand is still wet from being hidden in the shade. I run down the beach and stop when I reach a few big rocks. I climb up and sit down on the rock at the top, knowing I'm alone and that no one will come up here. I don't know what to do and what to think, so all I can do is cry. I don't hold back the tears, there's no point. I try to take deep breaths between the tears, but if can barely breathe. I hunch over, feeling like I'm going to throw up, but hold it inside me. I can't have any body noticing, or they might worry. He doesn't love me. Of course he doesn't, and I never truly believed that anyway. Just, I thought....after he'd kissed me....no. I have to stop. I take a very shaky deep breath through my tears. The wind blows strands of my blonde hair onto my face, making it stick to the trail of my tears, but I don't wipe them away. There's no point. All I can do is wait until later to go back home.

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-The Doctor's POV

When I arrive at the pub to meet Rose she's not there, and I can't help but feel confused. Rose never misses lunch...but then it dawns on me. I was late as it way, and now I'm even more late with what happened with Jane...I can't even bare to think about it. Her stupid Chapstick taste is stick stuck on my lips like glue, and I just want to rip it off and get her scent off me. Rose must've gone home, it's the only logical explanation. So I leave the pub and make my way back to our little flat. However, when I arrive home Rose isn't there like I'd thought she might be, instead I find the flat empty, not a sound through the whole house. I call her name but there's no reply. She must be out, she could've just gone out shopping. Feeling guilty, I slump onto the sofa and scuff off my shoes, I can't go looking for her, and even if I did, I don't know if I could look at her. I was just kissed by a woman I dislike, and have also been rejected by the woman I.... It's hard to even think those words, and saying them out loud would be another hurdle, but a hurdle I will never have to jump. Rose's words "just a game" won't stop running through my head, on a never ending cycle of reminding me of how that kiss meant nothing to her. With a sigh I turn on the TV, and prepare myself for a quiet night in.

Rose finally returns home two hours later, leaving herself with only one hour to get ready to go out to work. And by Rose's standards, that's not very long. She comes into the living room and immediately I know something's wrong. Her eyes are very red and puffy, and she looks more tired than I've ever see her. On impulse I get up off the sofa and walk over to her. "You okay?" I ask. She nods, avoiding my eyes.

"I'm fine"

"No, I can see you're not." I observe, and trying to hold her gaze but she just avoids it. She doesn't reply, and tries to shuffle past me, but I block her path "Tell me what's wrong, have I done something?" I ask, trying to think back to everything we've done today...not much together. Rose shakes her head.

"No. No you haven't" she says, but there's something behind the tone of her voice that tells me she's lying. Instead of playing with her anymore, I decide she'll tell me in her own time, so I go to cup her cheek lightly as usual, just as a sign were still friends, but this time she flinches and walks straight past me and into her room. I don't know what I've done, maybe it was for turning up to lunch late? But surely she wouldn't act like that? I know Rose well enough to know she wouldn't run off crying about nothing. Maybe she...No. She couldn't have saw. Could she? No. She can't have. She wouldn't have. Would she? Running my hands through my hair I flop down into the armchair. What if she did? What if she saw me and....No. She didn't see me. She can't have, and even if she did she wouldn't care...would she? No. I need to stop. End of. Satisfied with my conclusion, I jump back up to my feet and go into the kitchen to make a drink.

***

-Rose's POV

In half an hour I'm ready to go out to work again, not bothering to shower. I can barely find the energy to do anything, let alone sing. I try out a few notes and my voice comes back feeling sore, probably due to how much I was crying, straining my throat, and also over practicing. But I've got to do this, I've got to sing, if I don't I could loose my job, which could mean loosing my money, and inevitably loosing the flat. Despite the fact the Doctor could financially manage on his own as he did at the start of our six months together, I still need to help out and do my part. Even though I can barely look at him without wanting to burst into tears. Finding out someone you love doesn't love you back can shatter you into a million pieces, especially when you find that the hope you'd been holding on to had really been fake all along. With a sigh, I straighten my hair grip, tighten my shoelaces, and go out my room. The Doctor is sat in the living room, head deep in a book. I walk past him quickly.

"I'm going out," I say "I'll be back later". So I leave the flat and make my way down the stairs and on the way to work. I hear him calling after me, but I convince myself it's my imagination so carry on. It's only a ten minute walk, and it's already getting dark, still in the wintery time of the year, despite it being nearly February. It's hard to believe we've been here nearly 5 months, so much has happened, and so much has changed, and not all good things. With another sigh, I blink back tears and continue my walk to work.