I wake up in my bed, slowly sitting up but immediately checking the time.

3:08 a.m.

Why the hell am I up this early? And how did I get home?

And then my eyes widen as I feel my heart ache and remember the previous day's events. Some tears slip down my face and into my lap as I start to sob.

Jay... Jay's gone. If only I would've been a better girlfriend, he would still be here. It's all my fault.

I grab my pillow behind me and scream into it, letting all my anger, frustration and pain out. A sudden knock on my door causes me to look in that direction.

"Go away, Lachlan." I choke out, wanting to cry alone.

He opens the door and stands there, hair disheveled and bags under his eyes, in only boxers, causing my eyes to roam along his broad chest and linger on his abs.

"Let me cry in peace." I add, voice cracking.

"Caitlin..." He quietly says, slowly advancing towards me. I shake my head, trying to tell him that I don't need him. "You can't grieve by yourself. It's not healthy." He says, sitting on my bed, right next to my legs.

"I-I can too!" I respond, wiping the corners of my eyes and glaring at him as if to dare him to respond.

"Stop with the tough attitude. You can cry in front of me. I won't judge you." He whispers, and I start to lose what little composure I have left. I practically jump into his arms, catching him off guard. I wrap my arms around his neck as I cry, letting all my feelings out. He wraps his arms around my waist and I am surprised as I feel a few of his tears on my shoulder.

"W-why are you crying?" I ask, slightly pulling away in shock. Normally, at any other time, I would have laughed at him and made fun of him.

"Because I can't stand to see you so upset." He responds, causing me to slightly open my eyes despite it being almost four in the morning. "It hurts to see someone I care so much about in so much pain." He adds, causing me to blush. I hide it by looking away for a brief second, then returning my gaze back to him. Exhaustion suddenly hits me as I yawn. "Alright. Bed time."

"It's four in the morning." I say before falling back onto my pillows, chocolate brown hair spread out. Lachlan makes a move to leave and I start to feel sad. "Wait... Lachlan." I whisper, knowing he won't hear me. But he does, causing me to hold a breath. He raises his brow in question, and I mentally curse him for doing that. I love when he does it, but he doesn't know.

"What?" He asks, jerking me from my thoughts.

"Can you-can you stay?" I ask, a tint of pink appearing on my cheeks as I realize what I have just asked.

He slowly nods, and then adds, "yeah." I internally gasp, shocked at his answer. He walks to the other side of the bed and slips in, staring up at the ceiling. I try to find sleep but it will not come, even in my exhausted state.

So, I do the second riskiest thing: I turn my body so that I'm facing Lachlan and wrap my arms around him, snuggling into his chest as I close my eyes. He hesitantly turns his own body so that he's facing me as well and wraps his arms around me, causing me to smile.
~
For a whole week this has continued. Lachlan has slept with me, helping keeping me company and being there for me when I really need him.

Right now, he is recording a video while I waste away in my room, still too weak and sad to make an attempt to get out of bed. I turn my attention to my phone, that has gone off. I slide open the screen as it goes to a YouTube video. My eyes light up and I smile as I watch my all too familiar close friend and crush play some rocket league, the first time that I have actually smiled in days. About halfway through, though, my smile turns into a frown again. Lachlan looks glum and tired and it is expressed throughout both his gameplay and commentary.

Did I do this to him?

I start to open my eyes to the world once again as I realize that actions have consequences, and I caused Lachlan to become in this state. I shut off his live stream, unable to watch anymore. I look at my terrible figure in the mirror and finally decide it's time. I'm done with being weeping; it's time to return to the old me.

I push the covers off of me, and slowly stand up. I walk to the bathroom across the hall, similar to the setup in Lachlan's parent's house, and grab two towels. I turn the shower on and wait for it to get warm before I step inside and relax my tense muscles. After I get out of the shower, I wrap the towel around myself and walk to my room, grabbing a short black top and adidas pants. I brush my hair and decide to be natural today.

I walk downstairs and glance at the recipe on the counter before quickly tearing my gaze away before I fall into a meltdown again. I grab some noodles, chicken breasts, broccoli and ingredients for sauce. Grabbing a pot and putting water in it, I set it on the stove and turn it on. Waiting for the water to boil I recall all the times Lachlan has tried to get me out of bed, and here I am, out of bed by my own decision.

I turn my eyes back to the water as it boils and I add the noodles. I cut the chicken breasts into tiny pieces and grab a stir-fry pan. I put some oil on it as I set the chicken inside and put it on the stove. I start to hum to myself as I prepare the sauce, smiling in satisfaction once it is complete.

I'm going to make it up to Lachlan.
~
I smile to myself, admiring the easy but absolutely delicious dish I made. It's 1:00, meaning Lachlan should be just about finishing up his recording with Rob, Jon and Vikk.

As if on cue, the familiar man steps out of his office and looks my direction. He gasps, shocked. "Oh my gosh! You're alive!" He exclaims, disregarding the food right now. I find it cute how he came to me before food, while I would probably just run to the food. Food is my life, okay?

"Yeah, what did you think? I would be weak for the rest of my life? Ha! Nope!" I respond, stepping out of the way a bit for him to notice food.

"You made lunch?" He asks, eyes warming.

"Yeah. I.. I thought it would be a good way to say thank you for everything you've done for me the past week. I really appreciate it, Lachy." I stutter, blushing at the end.

"You're the best, Cait!" He smiles, sitting down in the seat across from where I'm currently standing. I sit down as well and start to eat. After a few minutes, Lachlan speaks. "I think we should go out tonight to celebrate this momentous occasion." He jokes, but underneath I can tell he's being totally serious.

I smile. "Alright. But only because you're actually using big words for once."

"Are you calling me dumb?!" He exclaims, causing me to giggle.

"Noooooooooooooo....." I drawl out, still playing with him. He pouts as I eat another scoop. "I'm just kidding, Lachy. You're very smart." I say in a voice reassuring a child.

He smiles, as if satisfied. "Yay!" I laugh, and then we both turn our eyes back to our lunch.

"I bet I can beat you." I suddenly say, looking back up at him.

"Oh, it's on!" He responds, and I smile.

This, this is what I live for. These small yet intimate moments that make everything better.