CHAPTER FOUR || BEGIN THE UNRAVELING

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"kelsey, well done tonight. i'll get in contact by the end of the week for your next job" john said as ash handed him a bag which presumably was full of drugs, after she'd driven halfway across the state to retrieve it for him, that being her first job. now she's gained more of his trust she was hoping all would go well with her getting deeper into this job.

ash had noticeably been a lot more snappy then she usually was while undercover not being able to stop thinking about what jay knew and what he was going to do with the information. The anger boomed in her chest, the betrayal she felt unlike any other emotion. those records should've been sealed there was no way he should've seen them. her thoughts spiralling out of control after getting back to her apartment as she grabbed a few bottles of corona from her fridge and sat on the couch thinking of what possible options she had now.

maybe she should've gone with hobbs when he'd asked, or called him back at the start of this. maybe joining intelligence was her biggest mistake. but everything she could think of linked back to why she originally left her family. the big secret she had sworn never to speak of again.

now gulping down her forth beer as laid back on the couch consumed by her thoughts her heart elevated as all the things that could possibly go wrong plagued her mind. everything was wrong, she couldn't understand how she'd managed to get herself into this situation. she thought of every single thing she could've done differently that would've had a different outcome.

when she was finally pulled from her thoughts by a knock on her apartment door, her brows furrowed as she questioned as to how someone got to her apartment without pressing the buzzer, pulling herself from the comfortable couch ash walked over to the door her gun firmly placed in her hand the few beers she'd consumed having a lingering effect on her body as she made her way to the door. looking through the peephole seeing the person she least wanted to see. opening the door to reveal a man with sorrowful eyes.

"ash i'm sorry, i just wanted to make sure you were safe. i wasn't expecting to find out about your dad or your rap sheet. i just wanted to help. I'll listen" ash huffed letting jay in ignoring his statement and walking over to the fridge to grab two more beers out and handing one to him.

"i know you wouldn't be a cop if there wasn't an explanation for what i found. you've just been lying to us all for so long... you know what i'm like with voight you should know what to expect when it comes to me. i know you never pressured me to talk about my shit, so i'm not gonna pressure you-" ash shook her head at his words not believing it for a second the rage she felt was still very real. but she'd changed, she wasn't the person she used to be, she had to at least try to salvage the relationship and job she had in intelligence.

"i grew up in down town L.A. my dad was an abusive alcoholic, he'd come home from the bar start shouting and completely loose it with me. but as i got older i made friends and they noticed. and those friends and i started racing, they saved me became my family, without them.. i'd probably be in a ditch somewhere. they saved my life. i moved in with them, then an undercover cop got involved betrayed us but he ended up letting my brother go, long story short a few years later the guy who saved me from my dad got arrested so we helped him escape, he was a good man, a really good man he kinda reminds me of you in a way. then to clear our names we stopped a few criminals lost some of our own and had our names cleared by hobbs they guy who called trudy asking for me" ash tried to keep it short and sweet, not giving up too much information but enough context to make her rap sheet make a little bit more sense but it only left jay with more questions.

"street racers to top ten most wanted?" jay questioned, only for ash to walk over to the couch were jay followed intrigued. jay was stumped he knew ash was a good person but he had such strong morals he couldn't decide if being with ash was going against them.

"we were on the run in mexico for a while, took down reyes.. well not us but hobbs" jay only felt more confused by the minute, his mind filling with questions and anger.

"you're a criminal.." ash scoffed again rolling her eyes, thinking whether or not if she she explain the situation and her past further as jay sat next to her on the couch.

"no i'm not, not anymore. i have a past. i don't regret any of the decisions i made. i was protecting my family. i've been a detective for over a year, i helped stop nuclear warfare, i helped take down some bad guys jay. do you really think anyone would've cleared my name if they didn't think i deserved it?" He stayed silent for a moment, Almost second guessing his decisions.

"so why after everything become a cop? and leave your family?" He asked, Trying to understand, trying to fathom what he was being told. He wanted to understand, yet somewhere deep down he couldn't swallow his own pride.

"things happened, i needed a change. i liked helping hobbs, so here i am." Ash Answered, Her heart aching as memories she so deeply wished she could forget replayed within her mind, memories she wished could stay buried.

"look if you can't handle it tell me now. i'll leave. i'll help hobbs take this guy down without you" She added, If she had to Leave... Then she'd Leave.

**

ash sat on a bench waiting for the person she'd planned to meet, Her heart racing with anticipation. Everything with jay had messed her Mind up, The memories she'd buried so deep within that darkest parts of her soul having resurfaced.

she couldn't explain the life she'd once lived, And she could never bring herself to regret it. That life was one she held dear despite the fact it was no longer her life. She'd never have made it if it wasn't for Dominic Toretto and Brian O'Conner.

if Jay couldn't get over it, she'd be done with intelligence but what would be the percussions of that, going back to her family? seeing them all after years of being apart. She knew the reactions wouldn't all be sunshine and roses.

And she wasn't sure she'd be able to see them, Be able to face the terrible decisions she'd once made, The lies she'd entangled herself in. And if the truth came out? She couldn't take that.

She caught a glimpse of a familiar figure out of the corner of her eye, Hobbs. Her chest constricted as she watched him approach her before slowly settling beside her on the bench.

"ashley you want to help us" hobbs asked as he sat next to ash. she sighed, she just wanted to know what they knew and see how much danger her family were really in.

Or maybe she wanted them Back, Wanted him back. But she wasn't ready to figure out which. The dread she felt was already borderline paralysing, She couldn't fathom making that any worse by seeing them again.

"i want to know if they're safe." Ash spoke, Her eyes never once meeting Hobbs as she stared across the street, Bringing her coffee cup to her lips letting the hot bitter liquid flood her senses.

"they are. but you know dom and brian well enough to know they can't stay out of trouble for long. they know you're here. they want to see you" they wanted to see her, As if her heart was being chipped away at she felt a pain flood her chest.

"just keep them safe. what do you guys know? about this case? what angle are they working?"ash needed to know, she couldn't decide what to do.. she felt that dread in the pit of her stomach that paralysing loneliness.

"there's a lot of chatter about a new girl on the team kelsey, which i'm assuming is you. tej has set some things up dom has a plan" ash swallowed her anxiety, She couldn't Let them do this. Standing up Ashley swallowed her pride.

"what can i do on my end? without blowing my cover or my team knowing" Ash asked, she loved her family she wanted them to be safe but she couldn't see them again.

"i'll speak to tej see if he can set up a wire for you to plant. dom and Brian will probably need some help when it comes down to busting them." ash nodded talking in hobbs words, The violent thud of her heart almost drowning out hobbs voice.

"you know he misses you right?"  Like being shot in the chest Ashley felt a harrowing pain sharply slice through her body, Pulling at the memories she'd buried deep within her. Her heart breaking so violently she could've sworn hobbs heard it. He missed her?

**

walking into mollys ash's eyes immediately Fell on kelly severide her best friend, walking up to him she sat on the stool Beside him ready to drink away the pain of the day, hoping an endless supply of beer was enough to dull the burning sensation in her chest.

ordering a corona with Hermann. she Sighed running a hand through her her silently hoping the day's events were just that and things would blow over, Yet she knew the likelihood of that...

"you alright?" kelly asked seeing his friend's utterly exhausted expression, Her slouched body language almost instantly indicating the type of day she'd had.

"no not really" ash sighed as she took the bottle of corona off the bar where Hermann had placed it, Popping the cap she instantly brought the bottle to her lips flooding her senses with beer.

kelly looked at his friend with concern knowing enough about her to know when things were going downhill, And by the woman's body language alone he could tell the next week would be rough.

"what's up?" kelly asked, ash sipped her corona as she contemplated what to tell kelly, and if she even wanted to. Her eyes scanning the bar until they locked with a familiar brunette's, Jay halstead.

Sighing Ash avoided his eyes turning back to Kelly in hopes of forgetting whatever fucked up life she was Living, The aching pains in her chest never easing as she took another sip of her beer.

"jay knows, i agreed to help hobbs. everything is about to blow up" she knew it would. things were so close to blowing up, ash could feel it coming.

all her secrets, her biggest secrets. they were going to come to light soon. and she knew it, and there was nothing she could do about it.

"ash everything will be fine. i'm here and you know that" but was it kelly she really needed?

**

A/N -
This is an older story of mine, im not the biggest fan of how i chose to write this, but i'm gonna keep adding to it and re-writing it. but i can promise you this is not my best writing 😭

Anyway! Somthing in the orange || Matt Casey is now out!! Id really appreciate it if you guys went and checked that fic out!

Thank you all so much for all the support! <3