I locked eyes with Sydney's brother, blushing as I realized it was far too noticeable, so I focused on Sydney and her parents.

"Hello, I'm Sydney's father Albert, but you can call me Mr. Allen. And you are?" he coldly shook my hand.

"Oh, I'm Jess–– Jess Mildred. A pleasure to meet you." I felt his rugged palm pull away.

His brown eyes softened. "Pleasure is all mine to the young lady helping my daughter become a well-educated student." He harshly said.

He went behind the kitchen counter, helping prepare dinner while Sydney and her brother stood still. I, on the other hand, went near the counter, asking politely if there was anything to do. And there was, so I helped prepare dinner for five. I moved swiftly to the dining room table, finishing setting it with Sydney's help. Yet, something else was drifting my attention to the brother of the girl I was "supposedly" tutoring.He fiddled with the unlit cigarette in hand, paying no attention to anyone other than himself.

His eyes locked onto mine, and I couldn't help but return the gesture.

***

Later that evening, we all sat down at their very antique white marble dining table- me beside Sydney.

"So, Jess, do you tutor many students?" Sydney's mother-Ellie passed me the garlic bread.

"This would be the first, but-"

"Jess is a straight-A student in every subject Mommy. Even though I'm her first student, she's a great teacher." Sydney interrupted.

I stood silent, listening to the sound of my heart beating rapidly at Ellie and Albert's mild expression, munching on their food.

"Well, I think that this is all bullshit!" Sydney's brother chuckled loudly, storming past us, and out into the cold. The sounds of the front door being slammed proved it.

"Sorry about him Jess. He's just bitter about everything right now." Sydney twirled her food with her spoon.

I cleared my throat, staying silent besides the scratching of my plate. Throughout the meal, I would occasionally glance at the front door when I thought no one was looking. Eventually, we all finished our meal, so I cleared the table with Sydney, while Ellie and Albert washed and dried the dishes, putting them away.

"Thank you so much for dinner. It was delicious, but I really must be going now." I smiled, both of them embracing me.

Sydney opened the front door as I finished zipping up my coat, the two of us stepped into the cold where I saw Sydney's brother sitting on the railing of the three stairs, lighting yet another cigarette.

"Hey asshole, go help Mom or something, Jess and I need to talk." Sydney bossed him around, but he just flipped her off.

"Go ahead, I'm not listening to your "conversation" as you put it." He used air quotes when speaking, and I tried to hide a smile.

"Whatever," Sydney walked off the three stairs, picking me up so I wouldn't slip. She then pulled me into a hug, which I hesitantly returned, continuing to stare at her brother.

"Thanks for tonight. I guess you could say my family is not your typical one, but you stayed which means a lot to me." Sydney complimented me and went in for another embrace, but I stopped her which made her brother start cackling.

She brushed it off and forced her freezing hands on my face, embracing it as she did at the dance last Friday night. I smiled awkwardly, letting her embrace my face, until I heard her teeth chatter uncontrollably, my ears apprehended them so blatantly.

"I think you'd better head inside, you don't want to catch a cold," I suggested.

She quickly removed her hands, marched up to the porch, and waved goodbye. I waved back watching as she disappeared into the house.

I inhaled and then exhaled, the sounds of footsteps crunching in the snow cleared my head.

Sydney's brother took another hit, which I disapproved of.

"Still the same, huh?" He formed a smirk.

"What do you mean?" I asked out of curiosity, not taking my eyes off him.

"I mean, you still hate cigarettes. But my real question is what are you doing with my sister; are you two hooking up?" He raised his brows.

I crossed my arms."I assure you I'm not. I mean, we're friends, but that's all." I plopped my hands down to my sides.

He dragged the cigarette back to his lips. "Not that it's any of your business, but I happen to like boys." I whipped my phone out knowing it was getting late. "Great, just great," I said quietly, only for Sydney's brother to take another hit of the death stick.

"Are you expecting someone, like your boyfriend?" He asked in curiosity, only for me to smirk at his pestering questions.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" I reverted my eyes to Brandon's car which finally showed up. I looked at the car and then at Sydney's brother, glad that I had the last word.

Off to the hospital with Brandon, I drifted to that moment, being with Sydney's family. They slowly started to heal the wound in my heart. My thoughts were racing as we got nearer and nearer to the hospital. What would I say, what should I do?

"You, okay?" Brandon took the keys out of the ignition, pausing to reflect on my faltered expression.

"Fine," I lied.

That's the thing Journal, I was so good at lying when it came to my emotions that it started to become easy.

Both Brandon and I walked into the hospital, the memories of Cat, Kinsley and I comforting one another submerged into my conscience. I stopped walking for a moment, wondering if this was the best idea.

Brandon turned and yelled; "Jess, c'mon!" I stared back at Brandon, sprinting towards him.

It was like a breath of fresh air seeped into my mind, avoiding all negativity. Except, if I only chose the hopeful path of redemption to do the right thing. Maybe it was the right path for Quentin's sake, but I was skeptical of it being the right path for me after the events last Friday night.

Still, I did the right thing and entered the hall of the sickly hospital, walking down the not-so-crowded hall, hoping to see Quentin's face as a reminder of the good in my life.

***

"Jess, Jess, Jess!" I heard my name being called, whining at the sight of my therapist, Doctor Alisha. I put my journal down on the bedside table, fiddling with the white wristband on my left wrist.

"Jess, it's time for our session, are you up for it?" She sat in the wooden chair that my nurse, what's her name-put out for her a while ago.

"I guess it depends on your questions," I gritted my teeth, scowling at the sight of her clipboard.

"Tell me, Jess, have you been writing in that journal long, or is it just because we talked about it during our last session?" She asked.

"I took your suggestion from the last session when you were playing the role of my doctor, not my shrink." I flipped to the page that I left off in my journal.

"And what are you writing in it? A letter? A poem-"

"I'm writing my story; what happened to me," I I had cut her off, and gripped the pen.

"Do you remember what happened to you?" I began to search my surroundings, settling for the plain walls.

I fiddled with my wristband once again, "I think about it every day, every second. How can't I think about it? " I cleared my throat. "It happened, and I let it happen." I snapped.

"Do you blame yourself for what happened?" She began scribbling on the clipboard.

"Of course, I do! Why do you think I'm in here?" I flicked my eyes onto my right wrist, which had a gauze bandage on it. "You can write that on your clipboard. I want to continue what I was doing before you interrupted me, asking ridiculous questions that you already know the answers to!" I snapped again.

"I think that's enough for today. I'm sorry if I upset you, Jess." She got up, her blonde ponytail, falling to the side of her left shoulder.

When she finally left, I grabbed my journal, picking up where I left off.