Author notes at the end

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Namjoon woke up to a wet patch of drool on his cheek and a shrill trilling in his ear.

It was the doorbell.

He ignored it. His eyes weren't ready to open yet and he still felt tired, so he lazily wiped his cheek with the back of his hand and turned over. Trying to drift off again.

But the doorbell just kept ringing.

"Whoever it is go away," he mumbled out, barely coherent. "Go sell your cookies somewhere else."

"Did someone say kookie?" a voice said, and Namjoon's head whipped around to see a young male peering in from the doorway.

He must've forgotten to lock it.

Namjoon sat up and rubbed his eyes, blinking at the dark haired stranger as he invited himself in.

"Good evening," he greeted warmly as his eyes scanned the room, and that's when Namjoon really looked and noticed the state of the front door.

Son of a whore, what happened to it? Mr Choi was going to lose his shit!

Namjoon stood, a little unsteady. It felt like his insides were rolling.

Did Taehyung put more of those girly multivitamins in his dinner again?

After assessing the room the male clicked his tongue. "Pixies have visited you first I see," he commented and Namjoon squinted at him.

Did he just say... Pixies?

"Doesn't matter," the male murmured, then walked up to him with a sly smirk. "I'm Jeon Jungkook, and I am here to make you an offer. A proposition that will make all your wildest dreams come true."

"One more step and I'm calling the cops," Namjoon warned.

Jungkook grinned. It looked wolfish. And now he could finally see how well conditioned the young guy was. Namjoon wasn't small but he clearly had him beat in both height and braun.

"I'm- I'm the one in charge here," he blustered weakly. "Get out. This is private property."

Jungkook ran his hand across the back of Namjoon's chair as he continued his approach.

"Believe me, you're not going to want to miss this," Jungkook insisted, then stopped in front of him and reached into his pocket. He pulled out a little black box, holding it in one palm as the fingers of the other settled on the lid.

Namjoon's face scrunched up. "Listen kid, if you're looking for your mail order husband, you won't find him here. Try Moon Taeil in apartment 13B."

Jungkook gave him a strange look but flicked the box open. A sliver of misted light flowed out and inside; laid on a little black cushion, was a brown bean the size of a thumbnail.

"Wow," Namjoon deadpanned. "And people say romance is dead."

Jungkook sucked his bottom lip between his teeth and turned around, strolling aimlessly around the room. "What I have for you is a unique, one time only, opportunity. In exchange for the location of your brother- I will give you this magical bean which, when eaten, will give you six wishes..."

Wishes? Where did this guy think he was, Disney on Ice?

Namjoon was about to tell him to get out again but was cut off when Jungkook abruptly twirled around, slack jawed.

"Is this Taehyung?" he asked, holding up a framed selfie of a smiling Taehyung.

"Uh- yeah, that's Tae," he answered, frowning as Jungkook brought the photo frame closer to his chest and ran his fingers reverently over the glass.

"This can't be him," he rasped.

Namjoon's frown deepened. "Of course it's him. I think I'd know what my own brother looks like," he pointed out, and Jungkook licked his lips.

"He's ravishing," he swallowed hard. "What a beautiful, dreamy boy."

Namjoon watched Jungkook, mystified, as he started to nose at the picture, actively nuzzling it. The way he was acting- a cross between a lovesick puppy and a sex starved animal on heat.

Jungkook put the picture down with a thud." Where is he?" he demanded, marching over with a determined look in his eyes.

Yeah, like Namjoon was going to tell him that now.

"He... He hasn't been back from work yet," he replied vaguely.

Jungkook kept advancing, looking at him reprovingly like he'd been caught in a lie. "Oh, he's definitely been back," he said.

Reaching out, Jungkook took Namjoon's hand then emptied the little black box; tipping the bean into his upturned palm. As soon as it touched his skin it started to jump around.

"Yah!" Namjoon twitched. "What's it doing?"

Jungkook slid closer, his eyes flashing silver. They filled his irises, turning everything into a mesmerising colour of liquefied steel.

"Six wishes," Jungkook reminded. "Imagine. You can have anything you want, and from the look of your modest dwelling, I'm sure there are many things you'd love to change."

The bean bounced insistently around his hand. Anything he wants? Hmm.

Namjoon nodded slightly. "Well, yeah...I guess I could always use a new chair..." he said then shook himself.

No! What is he thinking? He's actually considering letting this stranger... this... muscle pig get close to his little brother!

He thrust his hand out. "Get the hell out of my apartment!" he snapped but Jungkook just continued to stare, unfazed.

He should yell at him for suggesting it, cuss and push him out the door but wow, his eyes were so silver... What was the reason he was protesting again? He couldn't remember.

Six wishes. Anything he wanted. He could get more than one chair. He could get a thousand. He could get enough money to buy a new one every week. His face erupted into a goofy smile.

"Let's say this thing-" He stared at the bean. "-actually works. Could I ask for a billion won?"

Jungkook smirked and folded Namjoon's fingers over the bean. "You can ask for anything you want," he said, and Namjoon side eyed him.

"There's gotta be a catch?" he said, and Jungkook seemed exasperated about his continued questioning.

He waved his hand in the air. "It's a standard multiple wishes deal. Six wishes, no going back on wishes once made, no having five wishes then wishing for another six. It's more than fair. So what do you say, do we have an accord?"

Jungkook pushed his hand out for him to shake so Namjoon reached for it, but then stopped.

"Hold up," Namjoon said. "What do you even want to find Taehyung for?"

"It's nothing bad," Jungkook said nonchalantly without lowering his hand. "He found my dog and I'm trying to retrieve him."

"You're not going to do anything freaky to him are you?" he asked still a bit hesitant, and Jungkook averted his gaze for a second before looking back at Namjoon innocently.

"What do you mean?"

"Like you're not stalking him are you?" he chuckled dryly, and Jungkook copied him but when their chuckles subsided Jungkook remained silent.

Namjoon gawked at him. "You're not, right?"

He looked to the side. "I'm not stalking him, no," he answered, then quickly added, "But I am very much looking forward to meeting him."

Jungkook smiled then. It was big and toothy and caught Namjoon off guard. The guy had a nice smile. A smile that evoked the imagery of baby bunnies foraging in strawberry fields; of virtuous intentions and pure motives.

Seems trustworthy enough.

Namjoon's hand shot out. "Deal," he announced, clasping Jungkook's and shaking it. "If he's not at work he'll be at our grandmothers house."

Jungkook gazed down at their hands with a small chuckle then relinquished his hold. "Great. Does your grandmother like flowers?" he asked and Namjoon scoffed.

Taehyung didn't seem to mind spending time with their grandmother, but the old bat was too judgey and stuck up for Namjoon's liking.

"She likes money," Namjoon replied. "That's the only thing that impresses her."

He turned around and grabbed a notepad and pen from the coffee table, then jotted down the address.

"This is where she lives," he affirmed, before tearing out the leaf and handing it to Jungkook. "By the alley. Four doors down from the house with purple hearts on the mailbox. You can't miss it."

Jungkook studied the paper then pocketed it with a grin. "A pleasure doing business with you," he said, then turned around but before he could leave Namjoon stopped him.

"One more thing." He opened his hand and watched the bean bounce around merrily. "Once I eat this, how long before it starts to work?"

Jungkook glanced over his shoulder at him and smirked. "Don't worry, the first three hours are the worst."

Namjoon watched Jungkook's retreating figure as it walked out the door- pondering the cryptic statement.

The first three hours are the worst? What did that mean?

Casting his concerns aside, Namjoon pinched the bean between his thumb and forefinger. "Here goes nothing," he muttered to himself, then popped it into his mouth and swallowed it.

It took a couple of tries to gulp down because of the way it danced around so much but once it was settled in his stomach, Namjoon was disappointed when nothing happened.

No fireworks. No surge of power. No spidey senses. No weirdass glittery skin...

Nothing but a bizarre encounter and another dud investment.

"I knew it..." he grumbled. "Too good to be true."

Feeling rather let down about the whole thing, Namjoon ranted under his breath as he wandered over to the kitchen to grab a beer, but on the way his stomach started to cramp up.

He closed his eyes and fell to his knees as the pain lanced through his abdomen and up to his throat, cursing as Jungkook's parting words resounded in his brain.

If he ever saw that kid again he was gonna kill him.

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Quiz - Did you catch the song reference?

Moon Taeil (NCT) - The mail order suspect

I'm having to Google some of these cameos so hopefully they actually fit in with the characters I've added them to!

Any questions feel free!

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Summary for the title fairytale as follows...

The Good Bargain ~ The Brothers Grimm

A farmer tosses money into a pond so frogs can count it and gives his slaughtered cow to dogs so they can sniff it. He's not the brightest crayon in the box. The farmer goes to the king to complain about the behaviour of the frogs and dogs, which makes the king's daughter laugh. Apparently the king has promised her hand to whoever makes her laugh. The farmer doesn't want another wife, though, and manages to say so in the most insulting way possible. The king says he'll give the farmer "five hundred" if he comes back. Thinking it's money, the farmer promises some to a guard and the rest to a Jew. Turns out the king meant lashes, so now the Jew's whining about the pain, but the king thinks it's funny so he gives the farmer some actual money. Wanting revenge, the Jew slanders the farmer in front of the king, but due to some trickery, the Jew is beaten again and the farmer feels like he's finally made a good bargain.

| Named for Jungkook and Namjoon's bargain |