I know I was wrong but he won't forgive me
Even if he do, he won't forget it
Gotta live with tho for the rest of our lives
No matter how much I try to make it right
Got to the point where it's invading my mind
Can't get it out, I can't get it out
I didn't want to lose you
And now that's it's over, can't seem to get over it
And the radio ain't making it better
____________________

April sat on the bench, at the park, next to her daughter. She listened as Lydia told one of her many stories about her imaginary Unicorn.

It was a Sunday afternoon and it was her day off from work. Since she didn't get much time to spend with Lydia outside of the house, or hospital, she decided to take her out to the park.

She listened to her daughter attentively, laughing at her impression of her unicorn. As Lydia talked, her eyes wandered away from her and to the random people walking or running by. She somewhat froze when she spotted Jackson running along the path. He was wearing a blue wife beater and black shorts, with headphones in his ear.

It was the first she had really seen him since the day before. Their conversations were getting more awkward and it seemed like he was avoiding her at the hospital. She didn't know why but she suspected it had something to do with whatever Mama Avery had sent her to talk to Jackson about.

She continued to stare, it seemed like he was running in slow motion. His glistening skin looked sooooooo......

"Get yourself together April" she whispered to herself unaware that her daughter heard her every word

Lydia stopped talking when she heard her mother spoke.

"Mummy?" she said but didn't get a response

She followed her mother's gaze and slightly turned.  A wide smile grew on her face as she spotted Jackson running.

"Dr. Jackson!" she called out jumping off the bench

April snapped out of her daze and eyes widened when she saw her daughter running up to Jackson.

"Lydia!" April called out, but Lydia kept running

"Dr. Jackson, Dr. Jackson!" Lydia called out again trying to get his attention

Jackson slowed down after hearing his name through his music and looked around. He spotted Lydia running up to him and stopped in his tracks. He turned to face her and smiled as she approached.

"Hi Lydia" he smiled

"Hi" she smiled back rocking from side to side "What are you doing in the park?"

"Uh, I came for a run," he said kneeling down to her level "What are you doing in the park?"

Lydia began her ramble about how she was telling her mother a story. At the mention of April, he looked up and spotted her sitting on the bench not too far away from them. He simply smiled at her and she smiled back.

April sat from afar and watched the interaction. Lydia had grown pretty fond of Jackson and always talk about him when she got a chance, which wasn't always so comfortable for April.

If only they knew..........

"Lydia!" April called out, indicating it was time for them to leave.

Lydia frowned at her mother, she didn't want to leave.

"Looks like it's time for you to go," Jackson said

"Yeah" Lydia sighed shrugging her shoulders "Bye," she said holding her arms out for a hug.

"I can't hug you, I'm all sweaty," Jackson said pointing the sweat spots on his shirt.

Lydia frowned.

"But, we can hi-5" he grinned as he lifted up his palms

Lydia smiled widely as she slapped her hands against his and giggled.

"Bye," she said once more as she ran back towards her mother on the bench

Jackson lifted himself off the ground and looked as she ran back. Once she was in April's arms, he nodded towards them and continued his run down the path.
____________________

Jackson walked up to the door. He took a deep breath, lifted his hands and knocked.

Tonight was the night. Tonight was the night he found out the truth. After running into April and Lydia in the park that day, he couldn't just ignore the situation anymore. He had to find out. So once he got to his apartment, he called Alex and told him he would be over that night.

Seconds later the door opened.

"Dr. Jackson!" Lydia screamed in excitement, "What are you doing here?" she asked running up to him hugging unto his leg

"Alex invited me for dinner" he smiled ruffling her curls

He had to admit since after that day his mother told him her assumption, everything he saw Lydia did remind him of himself. She may look a lot like her mother but she had the Avery attitude down.

Lydia let go of his leg then stepped aside, allowing Jackson in. She closed the door, grabbed his hand and lead him to the kitchen, where Alex, Jo, and April were preparing dinner.

"Dr. Jackson is here!" she announced

"Hey" he greeted the three

"Hey" April and Jo replied, April being a little less enthusiastic than Jo was

"It's about damn you got here," Alex said wiping his hands on the closest kitchen towel "Come on, I need your help with some stuff," he said leading Jackson away from the kitchen to the living room, leaving the women to finish the cooking.

"Since when do you cook?" Jackson asked with a smirk

Alex rolled his eyes "Look, when your wife is hormonal and craving weird crap and she's too tired to cook it, you cook it" Alex explained

Jackson chuckled to himself. The sight of Alex cooking was pretty funny.

"Shut up!" Alex spat "At least you didn't have to deal with this crap with April"

"Dude shhhh" he said trying quiet Alex down "We don't know that for sure yet" he whispered

"Dude, she's yours, I can tell" Alex plainly said

"How could YOU even notice that and I couldn't?" Jackson asked

Jackson wondered why he never noticed these similarities while both his mother and Alex could.

"I'm around her every day, so I notice things," Alex said

"And my mom? She only met her for like, I don't know, 30 minutes, and she knew something was up."

"You may have forgotten but your mom is very nosey and likes to meddle, and in order to be those things you have to be very observant" Alex explained

"So my mother's need to always be in my business lead to her figuring it out?"

"Yep, pretty much" Alex replied

Jackson rolled his eyes.

"Ooooor you're just stupid" Alex added

Jackson gave him a stare as Alex shrugged. He shook his head and plopped himself down on the couch. How was he supposed to ask April if Lydia was his? He couldn't just come out and say it, right?
______________

Dinner was finally over and it was time for Lydia to go to bed. The four adults were in the living room talking. Lydia stood at the entrance of the living room, holding tightly unto Mr. Avery Bear as she begged her mother to stay up.

"Pleeeeeeease?" Lydia pleaded with her mother

"No, you can't stay up tonight," April said

"Awe man" Lydia whined with a pout on her face

"Now say goodnight" April instructed

"Goodnight" Lydia frowned as she walked away towards the stairs, headed to her bedroom.

The four sat there silent for a moment. Alex looked at Jo and she looked back at him. She gave him a slight nod then stood up.

"Well I better go clean up the kitchen," Jo said walked towards the kitchen

"I'll help," Alex said before April could offer

Alex got up and followed his wife to the kitchen, leaving Jackson and April to finally talk.

The two sat there silently, both wondering what they should say. As Jackson wondered how to start this conversation, she wondered why he was acting the way he was.

"Are you ok?" April asked

"Huh?" Jackson asked, he was too occupied in trying to figure how this conversation would work.

"You act all awkward and it seems like you're avoiding me. Are you Ok?" she said

"Actually, I'm not," he said

"What's wrong?" she asked sincerely concerned

He stood up, feeling a bit uncomfortable sitting. He started pacing back and forth in front of April.

"So, my mom.....and Alex, have this...assumption about something. They both think it's true, but I kind of doubt it. I mean.....there is this slight possibility that it could be true......but I don't believe it's true, I don't want to believe it's true...I mean they're wrong, right? Tell me they're wrong April! You need to tell me if it's true"

"Is what true?" she hesitantly asked, not really wanting to hear the answer

He swallowed hard "Is Lydia my daughter?"

Just what she feared. She slowly stood up and walked towards him.

"Jackson........"

"Is she?" he asked again

FLASHBACK

April sat there, staring at her doctor, with a blank expression on her face, while Matthew sat beside her with a huge smile on his.

"Congratulations" Dr. Paris smiled at the two

"Thank you" Matthew replied

They both looked at April, staring at her blank expression.

"April?" Matthew said

"Huh?" she said coming out of her thoughts

"Are you ok?" he asked

"Uh...I'm fine, I'm just...shocked," she said putting on a fake smile

"Yes, I know. Having a baby might be a big surprise, especially when you aren't planning for one" Her Gynecologist said

"It is," Matthew said

"Uh, do you know how far along I am?" April asked

"No, I'm not, but we can schedule an ultrasound appointment to find out" her doctor answered

"I would like that" April said

"Good. You can call later so we can set it up"

April and Matthew nodded in approval.

"Alright," she said getting up from behind her desk "Congratulations again"

After saying their goodbyes to the doctor, April and Matthew left her office and were on their way to the parking lot.

Once they were in the car, Matthew let out a sigh of relief.

"I can't believe this, we're having a baby" he smiled "I can't wait to tell my mom......"

"No!" April said cutting him off

"What? Why?" he asked turning to her

"It's too early to start telling people about it. Things can happen you know" she said "I don't want to start telling people and then have a miscarriage"

"Ok fine, We won't tell anyone" he smiled at her, knowing she had a point

He took her hand in his and smiled at her, she smiled back. He started up the car and then slowly drove off.

A miscarriage wasn't the reason why April didn't want him to tell anyone.
__________________

It was the next day. April stepped into the Cleveland Clinic, where she was now the new Trauma Attending.  Once she changed into her dark green scrubs, she headed down to the pit.

Working in this hospital wasn't quite as comfortable at first as working at Grey Sloan, but it was a great hospital, they had a great trauma program and had the highest rank in the state. She liked it there, it was the one place she could do what she wanted without Jackson or Matthew being on the brain. But the thing she didn't like so much was the other doctors and the green scrubs. The other doctors treated her worse than the doctors back at Seattle did when she first came in from Mercy West. And the green scrubs, coupled with her red hair, made her look like Christmas.

She finally got to the nurse's station and asked for her charts.

"Good Morning Dr. Kepner" she heard

She turned around to see who it was. A smile appeared on her face.

"Good Morning Dr. Harris" she smiled

Natalie Harris, the Orthopedic surgeon, was April's closest friend at the hospital. Although the other doctors annoyed her, Natalie was the only one she warmed up to. She was dark-skinned, had long brown curled hair and an over the top personality, much like Mama Avery's.

"What's on the agenda today?" Natalie asked

"Just a lot of post-op notes and maybe a surprise incoming trauma" she answered

"Same here" she smiled going through her charts "Oh, and I heard the good news, Congratulations"

April looked at her confused "What good news?"

"About the baby! I thought you would have called me first though when you found out" she answered

"How'd you know about that?"

"Matthew told me"

"Ugh" April groaned, she should have known he wouldn't be able to keep his mouth shut.

"Wait, why are you ughing? You should be happy about this" Natalie said patting her friend's back

"I am happy that I'm having a baby, but..........." she began but stopped

"But what?" she asked confused

April grabbed Natalie's hand and lead her to a supply closet close by. She closed the door behind her.

"Ok, why are we in a supply closet?" Natalie asked confused

April passed back and forth in the room, ignoring her friend's question. Seeing that her question was ignored, Natalie went back to her original question.

"You were saying?" she said

"I'm a little unsure about this pregnancy" April answered

"How could you be unsure about it? You want a baby, Matthew wants a baby, it's all good"

"But what if it doesn't add up?"

"If what doesn't add up?" Natalie asked

"The dates!" April said, almost yelling

Natalie's nose cringed, giving a confused look. Her face then softened when she finally knew what she meant.

"You mean the whole Jackson thing?" she whispered

Yes, Natalie knew about Jackson. April needed someone to talk to, and she was the closest thing she had.

"Yes I mean the Jackson thing," she said

"So you mean that Jackson could be the......"

"Yes Nat, Jackson could be the father" April confirmed

"Oh snap!" Natalie said covering her mouth, thinking about how messed up the situation could be

"I know" April whined

"Well, how would you know for sure? Do you know how far along you are?"

"No, I have to make an appointment to find out" April answered

Natalie walked up to her and grabbed her shoulders. "You, my friend, are in a lot of trouble with Jesus" she stated

"I know" April answered

Natalie stepped out of the supply closet, leaving April to ponder her next move. What was she going to do if it turned out that her baby was Jackson's and not Matthew's?
_________________

April was laid back on the table. Her shirt was up, exposing her abdomen. Her doctor had the wand in her hand, as she smoothly moved it around on the blue gelled stomach. Five weeks and under, was what she hoped her doctor would say. Five weeks and under would mean that she wouldn't have to go through the drama and hurt of telling Matthew the baby wasn't his. Five weeks and under meant that she could stay here in Ohio and try to make her marriage, which was slowly starting to fall apart, work.

Although she knew choosing to be with Matthew was the right decision, she didn't feel like it was. She tried to feel happy about the situation, but it was simply impossible to feel one way when you can't help but feel the other. They had many arguments, Jackson being the center of most of them. Her mother told her that the rough patch would pass and they'll get through it, but it didn't feel that way.

"Everything looks wonderful," Dr. Paris said removing the wand from April's stomach

"Good" April smiled "And......do you know how far along I am?"

"By the looks of everything....." Dr. Paris said scanning the still picture on the screen of the fetus "......I'd say seven to eight weeks"

Crap!

End of Flashback

"Yes" April finally answered

Jackson stood there, staring at her. The anger in him grew and grew. He doubted it, he doubted that she would ever do something like that. How could she not tell him?

"Jackson listen........"

"We have a daughter and you didn't tell me?" he asked

"Jackson..........." she began, her eyes were now beginning to fill with tears

"How could you not tell me about her?" he yelled leaving the living room, going into the hallway

"I didn't know how to" she quickly said following him, before she could get interrupted by him

"Well you had, what, five years to figure it out and you couldn't come up with anything?" Jackson said stopping in his tracks and turning around, with a now obvious angry look on his face

"This is harder than you think Jackson!" April said as her eyes couldn't hold the tears anymore, and it started flowing down her face

"What's so hard about picking the damn phone, calling me and telling me I have a kid?!" he yelled

April stood there silent, he had a point.

"If I didn't say anything, would you have even told me that Lydia was mine?!" he asked

"I was planning too!" she yelled back

He shook his head, not believing a thing she said.

"Does Lydia know?" he asked

She simply shook her head no, as the tears came pouring out.

"Does Matthew even know? Does he know he's been raising my daughter this whole time?" he asked

"He............" April spoke but was cut off by her daughter

"Mommy?" Lydia said as she stood on the stairs, looking at them both through the wooden railing bars

"Lydia sweetie, what are you doing up?" April asked, frantically wiping the tears from her eyes

"I heard yelling," she said as she walked down the remainder of stairs and went to her mother "Are you Ok?"

"I'm fine" April looked down at her smiling

Lydia looked up at Jackson and noticed the angry look on his face.

"Are you Ok Dr. Jackson?" Lydia asked him

He stood there staring for a few seconds. There his daughter stood, clueless as to who he really was.

"I have to go" he quickly said walking away, going to the door to get his jacket.

"Jackson...." April began but stopped once he turned and gave her that "not now" look

He put his jacket on and opened the door.

"Bye Dr. Jackson" Lydia smiled waving towards the door

Without turning back to say goodbye, Jackson walked out and slammed the door behind.

The smile slowly faded from Lydia's face.....why didn't he say goodbye?

April stood there, holding back the tears that threatened to show itself. How was she going to fix this?

Lydia stood next to her confused. Why was her mother and Dr. Jackson arguing? And why where they arguing about her?
________

AN: Thanks for the comments and votes, they mean alot!!
And what do you guys think of the first 3 episodes? I know I was a mess watching the premiere! How could April just go back to Matthew like that? Jackson was kind of harsh about what he said, but he had to say it. And YAY to April passing her boards and Jackson being the first to know about it! Him not hugging her hit a spot though!  But can't wait for the 200th episode this week! I'm not expecting any Japril scenes but I still can't wait!