Almost before Sheik knew it, two months passed. Things around the castle were starting to kick up into higher gear in terms of preparing for the Calamity's inevitable return. As a side effect of that, desperation became a tangible thing in the air, growing more prominent with each day that passed. Zelda was taking it hardest of all, based on the increasing frequency that she needed some form of outside assistance to fall asleep at night or how she was gradually being forced to stop her research to pray more. King Rhoam's decisions were questionable at best and downright terrible at worst when it came to his daughter, but neither Sheik nor Link could do anything substantial about it.

Speaking of the other knight, the last few months had only served to further confuse Sheik. Whenever he spared a moment to actually stop and think about his feelings, that was. Despite all his efforts to maintain an uncaring stance toward him, he actually found himself growing fond of Link. But each time it came up, Sheik kind of freaked out and buried those feelings deeper within his consciousness. Never mind the fact that seeing his smile gave him an odd feeling almost like butterflies were trapped in his chest.

Oh yeah, and then there was the little fact that just looking at him could help him take a step back and relax.

But all of that was nothing. It had to be nothing. Especially considering what today was.

Hylia, his hands were shaking so badly he could hardly adjust the clasp of his sword belt.

"Get it together." Sheik hissed under his breath, closing his eyes and tilting his head back as he did so. "All you're doing is carrying out a routine mission. Just because you have to see her for the ceremony doesn't mean anything."

He never had been good at lying to himself.

After much more struggling than was necessary, Sheik had the clasp adjusted properly and he was ready to leave his room. Last night, Zelda had told him and Link that she would meet the two of them at the front gate of the castle, because she wanted a moment alone this morning. Also, they were leaving extremely early, even for the three of them. It was mostly because she wanted to avoid her father's nagging (he thought it was an exceedingly odd decision to walk all the way to Kakariko when the trio could just take the horses and carry out the troop check-in that they'd been asked to do in half the time, and Sheik was inclined to agree- to an extent, of course).

Maybe he could just blame his probable tardiness on accidentally sleeping a bit too long, but Zelda would see right through that lie. He hadn't slept well last night and it was plain to see on his face, but he would rather die than admit that he was nervous about the ceremony upon his arrival back home.

What wonderful things would his aunt have to say to him this year? The anticipation was going to drive him insane. Or it felt like it, anyway.

Sheik slipped out of his room once he had (somewhat) collected himself and ghosted through the castle. This early in the morning, he wanted to be considerate of all the people who were still sleeping, so it wouldn't do to make a lot of noise. Which, of course, he didn't. His armor paired with years of training made his footsteps silent.

Somewhat surprisingly, he wasn't all that late. Zelda and Link were both waiting for him, but they didn't look irritated or anything.

"Good morning!" Zelda exclaimed as he stopped in front of the two. Her enthusiasm died a little as she took in the visible parts of his expression and his body language, though she didn't comment on it. She already knew what today was for him and why he was so on edge. "It's supposed to rain later, so we'll have to really push the pace if we want to make it to Kakariko before then."

"That should be fun." Sheik looked up at the sky and sighed quietly. Sure enough, Zelda's assessment seemed correct, if the dark clouds gathering on the pre-dawn horizon were enough to go by.

"I think it gives us. At least half the day before then." Link chipped in, not even bothering to turn around to look at it. He must've already made this estimate, or maybe he was literally just guessing. It could be either one, and Sheik was already too tired to try and read into his body language like he usually did. Anxiety's a bitch like that.

"Yes, so we should get going." Zelda said. Without further ado, she turned on her heel and started walking through the gates, leaving Sheik and Link to follow her.

Since he was so out of it today, it took him an embarrassing amount of time to realize that Link was trailing father behind than he usually did, so he slowed his pace to match his. Sheik didn't even need to verbally ask what was wrong. All he had to do was turn his head to face the other knight, Link clearly picking up on the curiosity in his gaze.

"Is everything okay?" Link asked, keeping his voice low to avoid Zelda overhearing.

"Yes, I... I'm fine."

Lie.

Link obviously didn't buy it, but he didn't pry. He never did. It was one of the things that Sheik liked the most about him, if he was being honest. That, and the fact that he was a very good listener when he chose to open up more.

But that didn't mean anything, right?

"Alright." Link hesitated, then reached over and briefly rested his hand on Sheik's shoulder. "It'll work out. Whatever it is."

Sheik ignored the way his heart felt like it legitimately stopped and skipped at least 3 beats after hearing those words. He was probably blushing like mad under his mask and he didn't know why, but Link couldn't see it, so it was fine. "I hope so."

His little half smile was going to be the death of him one of these days, if he allowed himself to be entirely honest.

Having said what he needed to say, Link dropped his hand from Sheik's shoulder (he half wished that he didn't, but those thoughts were banished as soon as he had them) and started walking to catch up with Zelda. Sheik had to take a second and just breathe before he followed suit, mentally cursing himself for acting so weird. Hylia, what was wrong with him today?

It had to be his nerves. Yeah, that was it. He always acted weird whenever he was nervous, and he damn was now.

The first few hours were relatively uneventful as they made their way across Hyrule Field. All the monsters were in hiding from either the impending rain or the regular patrols the King sent out. Well, that, or they were just straight up dead. Whichever one was the case, the closer they got to his home, the more Sheik felt like there was a physical weight on his shoulders pressing him down. Not even Link's presence could help offset the pressure at this point.

As they were crossing Proxim Bridge, the first few droplets fell from the dark grey clouds above them. Zelda cursed under her breath and turned her head to look at the two of them. "I guess now is as good a time as any to stop and rest for a little while."

Link looked over at Sheik like he was expecting him to say something, seeing as he was usually the one to step up and make decisions in this situation. But he didn't, so Link nodded in agreement and said "There's a tree right there. That could work."

"Yes, that looks good." Zelda responded, noticing it a second after Link pointed it out. She turned to the right and stepped off the road, a crack of thunder accompanying the action. This spurred her and the two knights into a quick jog, seeing as the stray droplets were bound to turn into a full on rainstorm at any moment.

And, sure enough, it did. By the time they reached the tree, it was absolutely pouring. If he hadn't needed to preserve his magic reserves for the ceremony later, Sheik probably would've made a magic umbrella of sorts that would keep the rain off of them. However, that wasn't the case, so they all got basically drenched. There was a rock ledge housing two guardian statues, and the grass beneath it seemed to be mostly dry, so Zelda sat down there with a quiet sigh of relief. Link made no move to sit down beside her. Instead, he slipped the Master Sword- scabbard and all- off his back. He unsheathed the sword and gently laid the scabbard down next to Zelda before walking a safe distance away from her and starting a well-rehearsed sequence of slashes.

"You never take a break, do you?" Zelda asked, her voice light and teasing.

Link shook his head, barely even pausing his sequence. Sheik hadn't realized that he was staring until a droplet of water fell off a leaf above him and onto his head, startling him back to reality. Ugh, he needed to do something more athletic than just walking to get his mind off of everything.

"Want to go a few rounds? This probably isn't going to let up too soon, and I don't know what time my aunt will let me go tonight." Sheik asked. It almost felt like his mouth moved before his brain could catch up, but whatever. At least he hadn't made a fool of himself or something.

"Sure thing." Link responded, halting his drills and taking a second to properly catch his breath before assuming his ready stance.

Sheik unsheathed his sword- he was going to have to be more careful than usual, since he hardly ever used the real thing when sparring, unless it was against another Sheikah- and took up his own stance. He didn't bother unclasping his scabbard, because what good would that do for him? He would have to fight with it on his back in a real battle anyway, so it was better to get the practice. 

As usual, Link moved first. It looked like he was going to be using his left hand today, but after his initial strike missed, he switched his sword to his right hand and immediately went into another attack. Sheik only managed to stop it by using the notch at the base of his blade, which was what it was for anyway. He tried to twist his sword to disarm him, but instead, Link jumped back before it could happen. They circled around each other for a bit, assessing the other's movements and trying to gauge who would move next.

In a rare move this early on in a bout, Sheik went on the offensive next. He feinted to Link's right, ducking under his retaliatory slash, and shifted his grip on his sword so that he could hit the back of Link's knee with the pommel of his sword. The other knight grunted in surprise and tried to kick Sheik with his left foot, but he jumped out of the way in the nick of time. A momentary hesitation very nearly cost him the match, because Link took advantage of Sheik's temporary blind spot while he dodged to hit him on the shoulder with the Master Sword's pommel. That distracted him more, so he almost didn't catch Link's fist as he swung at his face.

They stood like that for a few seconds, just watching each other and waiting for the next attack. Sheik's initial reaction was to try a roundhouse kick to get the other knight off of him, but he didn't exactly have enough room for it to be effective. Also, Link would likely be expecting it, because it was kind of a habit of his. So, instead, he shifted his grip on Link's hand, moving it down to his wrist. His eyes widened slightly- he knew what he was trying to do now- but it was too late. Sheik dropped his sword, grabbed Link's forearm with his other hand as well, and brought his knee up as he pulled him forward. This had the effect of driving Link's stomach directly into his knee, knocking the breath out of him.

From there, all Sheik had to do was disarm him, which was easily accomplished by squeezing Link's wrist lightly. If this was a real battle, he wouldn't have been gentle about it, but they had worked out a series of signals that conveyed what one wanted the other to do so they didn't hurt each other too badly. Then Sheik shifted so that his left hand was gripping Link's collar while his right drew a kunai and pressed it to his throat.

"Do you yield?" Sheik asked quietly.

"I yield."

He stepped back, a little smile already creeping onto his face, and returned his kunai to the box. Thankfully, his head already felt much clearer. Sparring did wonders for making his brain shut up and focus on more important things. That wasn't to say that the ceremony wasn't important- he wouldn't be this worked up about it if that was the case- but if he was distracted, what would happen if a monster snuck up on him? He'd be completely useless and people would die. Well, not just people. Link or Zelda, or maybe both of them at the same time. And then he'd really be a pathetic excuse for a Sheikah.

Those scenarios faded as Sheik gripped the hilt of his sword once more, lifting it from the damp grass where he'd dropped it earlier. Once he straightened up, he looked at Link and was about to suggest another round when Zelda's voice caught his attention.

"You know, I don't believe I've actually seen the two of you in combat against the other. That was quite impressive. Well done!" Zelda sounded genuinely impressed, even though she had literally seen them in battle several times over the last five months or so. Was that really how long it had been since all this had started? It almost seemed like it had been longer.  

"That was nothing." Link responded sheepishly. "He usually gets more flashy."

Zelda hummed thoughtfully. "Yes, that makes sense."

"Link is exaggerating." Sheik said with a mildly embarrassed laugh. "Not my fault he makes it so easy to get fancy with it."

"Oh, really? I make it easy?" Link asked, clearly joking based on the amused look in his eyes. "Wanna back that up?"

"Of course I do."

Their next bout actually ended up taking longer and was very nearly called as a draw, but Link managed to come out on top. Quite literally, because he tripped Sheik and had him pinned to the ground, forcing him to yield once he remembered how to breathe. (It was a combination of having the wind knocked out of him and also Link being so close, but he dismissed the second one as soon as it even popped into his head.)

"Was that flashy enough for you?" Link asked before he released Sheik.

"I'd ask you to prove it again, but we're probably running short on time judging by how the rain is slowing down now." Sheik whispered, unable- or maybe, just maybe, unwilling- to look away from him.

Link laughed once, then moved to the side and stood up so Sheik could do the same. He cast a glance over at where Zelda was sitting, an unreadable expression on her face, then rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "Unfortunate."

Now that the other knight wasn't so close to him, Sheik remembered that he was, in fact, lying on wet grass. And that wet grass was slowly soaking through his bodysuit. So, he got to his feet, looking anywhere but at either of his two companions. Damn it, Zelda was so going to tease the hell out of him for this later.

Thankfully, though, she didn't comment on any of... that. She just smiled slightly and said "Both of you make your families proud. Link, you follow your father's path, and Sheik, your entire family's path thus far. I'm not surprised that my father thinks so highly of you two."

Sheik bowed his head in acknowledgement, taking a deep breath to steady his nerves. If only Impa thought the same. The words caught in his throat, no matter how much he wanted to say them. He just... couldn't. Not even when he replaced her name with "my aunt." Was it fear or something else that kept a chokehold on him? Did he even want those answers now, as he walked directly to what would likely be one of the worst birthday ceremonies of his life?

"Though... I have one question." Zelda's voice dropped until it was barely above a whisper. "What would you do if you ever realized that maybe you weren't meant to become a knight, or a warrior, even though that's the only thing you had ever been told? And if everybody around you constantly laughed it off and told you that your birthright mattered more than your own feelings on the matter... would that change anything?"

"I've already experienced this. To some degree with the. Master Sword." Link answered. "I didn't want to be. The Hero. But, well, fate doesn't wait. For you to be okay with things. It sucks. No other way about it."

"Appearances are rarely reflective of the person's true nature." Sheik added. "Someone could seem completely okay with their destiny, but inside they're begging the Goddesses to take this burden off their shoulders so that they might finally breathe easy. Birthrights are a lot like leaden weights eager to drag you into the depths of despair, but just like with those weights, there's usually someone there to pull you up before you drown. Had I been placed in this specific scenario, I likely would turn to the people I care about for support in trying to remain true to what I know I want."

He hadn't meant for that to get so poetic, but it had just... happened. Though if Zelda wanted to be vague and use metaphors to ask for advice on her own situation, he'd retaliate with some of his own. Two could play at that game. And, well, they did usually help.

"Friends- true friends, anyway- will always. Have your back." Link nodded in agreement with what Sheik had said.

Zelda didn't respond for several minutes, an unreadable emotion or two flickering across her face. But, when she finally managed to recompose herself, she smiled weakly and stood as well. "I'm sorry, I let my doubts get the best of me. I just... I wonder-" Zelda stopped and shook her head, evidently trying to move past this moment of weakness and get their walk back underway. "Nevermind. Thank you both. I believe the rain is letting up now, so shall we continue on our way?"

Both knights nodded, and they set off again. 

Oddly enough, it was comforting to know that he wasn't the only one having a terrible day caught in their own head. Sheik felt a bit disgusted at himself for even having these thoughts in the first place, but that was neither here nor there.

Sparring had brought him a little bit of clarity and mental peace, but everything hit him all over again as soon as they walked under the Dueling Peaks and came within view of the stable. The sun was going down as they emerged from under the twin mountains, giving them an impressive view that Sheik found himself unable to really appreciate.

Link started walking a little closer to him when the trio crossed Kakariko Bridge, seeing as it was significantly higher than the small bridge over by the stable and it likely set off his aversion to heights. But he didn't go back to his original spot afterward, which was weird. Either way, it was very helpful in keeping his nerves to manageable levels, as much as Sheik hated to admit it (even to himself.)

They weren't far from his home now. It had to have been around eight or nine in the evening, after a long day of traveling, but Sheik felt more exhausted internally than externally. Worrying non-stop all day wasn't fun at all.

As they walked closer, Zelda seemed to brighten up and Sheik only sank further into himself. Technically, tomorrow was his seventeenth birthday, but Impa would chew him out for nearly being late anyway.

He very nearly snapped entirely as he walked under the first gate, watching the moonlight wink off the bronze eye that stared back at him, reproach in its lifeless gaze. The sight pinned Sheik to the spot, all his limbs freezing up as a rare terror overtook him.

Link's hand on his shoulder snapped him back to reality.

"You alright?"

"Ye-yes, I'm fine. Sorry. I just... I don't know what came over me." Sheik mumbled.

Zelda turned and looked back at the two, a concerned frown on her face. "Sheik, if it's that bad, please don't force yourself to do this."

"No. I have to. It'll only be worse if I don't."

Thankfully, his companions both dropped it after hearing his tone of voice. Link had questions; that much was obvious. But he didn't pry.

Maybe Sheik would explain a few things, if he managed to survive his aunt.

The noisemakers were usually relaxing, but today they set him on edge. Most people were asleep by now (it was damned late- almost midnight, if he had to make a guess) so that helped a little. Even the air, which carried a scent Sheik couldn't quite explain aside from the fact that it smelled like home, seemed like it was about to choke him and leave him for dead in the street.

Impa was waiting for the three of them in front of the Elder's House, her arms crossed and an unreadable expression on her face. Sheik suddenly felt like he was going to throw up, all of the nerves from the entire day showing up all at once and nearly overwhelming him.

It didn't help at all that just seeing the house was normally enough to make him panicky.

His scar burned like he'd been cut all over again.

Please, I'm sorry-

Get a fucking grip. It's not that bad. She could have outright tried to kill you, like he'd heard about other relatives who'd been forced to care for an orphan doing. She might not have been great, but she could have been worse.

"You're late." Impa said, her voice carefully neutral. "I was expecting you three to arrive two hours ago."

Zelda stepped forward and bowed deeply at the waist, as was appropriate in this situation. Impa was to be the next chief and was in her place of power; showing any disrespect would only make things worse for everybody. "We got a little held up. My apologies, Impa."

She was silent for a moment, and Sheik had never wanted to run away more in his entire life. "This is why a day's travel was set into your plans, I suppose. Very well. I will meet with you tomorrow morning to collect my nephew for his ceremony. In addition, because I will be... otherwise occupied, Kentaro will take you through the preparations completed so far. In the meantime, I suggest you get some rest in the inn. Sheik, you already know what you must do."

Try as he might, his mouth wouldn't form the words that he wanted to say. Needed to say, more like. So, instead, he bowed to her, waiting for the subtle shift that told him she had nodded, then straightened up and walked to the inn to go arrange sleeping quarters for his companions.

"On behalf of my father and the Kingdom of Hyrule, I thank you." Zelda bowed again, though this time with only her head, then moved to go follow Sheik. Link followed suit, as always. Except this time he actually sped up so that he overtook Zelda once he judged that Impa had turned around, easily catching up to Sheik as he did so.

"If you're comfortable with it. I thought we could. Ah. Share a room?" Link asked quietly. "Of-of course, I'm not. Forcing you to or anything! I know you have an. Important thing tomorrow. I just thought that. It might help? Um, that is to say. I think it would be a good. Idea. Just in case Zelda. Is attacked. So we're both. In the same place."

Sheik found himself at a total loss for words yet again, not entirely certain that he'd heard Link correctly. His mind was still racing from just being in his aunt's presence on the eve of such an important day, so it was entirely possible that he had hallucinated the entire offer.

It seemed that Link mistook his silence for complete loathing of the idea, based on the way he turned bright red and wouldn't meet Sheik's gaze. "Er, nevermind. Forget I said anything."

"No, Link." Sheik put a hand on his shoulder. "I'd like that. Tha- uh," he paused as the words almost choked him, "thank you."

Now, was that really so difficult? Apparently it was. Fucking hell, he was so confused. Why was everything so... so stupid? Yeah, stupid seemed to be the best word. There were really no good ways to describe exactly how Sheik felt about this situation, but that seemed to work well enough.

It was completely worth it for the tentative little smile Link gave him afterward.

But despite the memory of that smile and the whispered "good night" from the other knight before he fell asleep, Sheik still didn't sleep well that night.

-/-/-/-

Everybody always seems to make birthdays into a much bigger deal than they really end up being. Especially ones as important as your seventeenth or eighteenth. They make it seem like you would wake up on those mornings completely changed, gifted with some sort of divine revelation that makes everything seem new and wonderful again.

Sheik's morning was nothing like that. He woke up from a nightmare stupid early in the morning and couldn't get back to sleep, waiting until the sun had begun to peek through the heavy clouds of the rain that had fallen while he had been awake before sneaking off to his usual mountaintop to meditate. There, he found himself unable to focus for longer than fifteen minutes before anxiety overwhelmed him once again. When he climbed down, he felt significantly worse than before. Which was never a good sign.

His aunt met him and his companions in front of the Elder's House, just like last night. She had a tall, broad-shouldered Sheikah warrior who seemed to be in his early forties with her. He was probably an archer based on those shoulders, so Sheik wasn't too familiar with him. They exchanged respectful nods, as warriors did, before he bowed to Zelda and Link.

"My name is Kentaro Ishugiro. Lady Impa has tasked me with showing you our forces, Princess. Please, follow me." Kentaro said, speaking in a voice that was rough from years of shouting, yet still melodic as most Sheikah's voices were. He gestured for the two to follow him, already beginning to walk off in the direction of Sahasra Slope, where the demonstration was supposed to take place.

Zelda and Link exchanged a glance with each other, then they both looked at Sheik with twin concern in their eyes. It was well hidden, thanks to who they were currently in the company of, but it was present all the same. Any other time, he would have gotten frustrated by this. Now, Sheik was just grateful. He nodded slightly to them as if saying "I'll be fine," hoping it wouldn't turn out to be a lie even if he already knew it was in his heart, then turned to face his aunt.

They allowed themselves to be led away by the Sheikah archer, and Sheik was left alone with his idol and his worst nightmare.

He kept his head down as Impa led him into the house, which was already perfectly set up. A circle of candles enclosed two dark purple cushions with blood red embroidery on the edges, and the scent of her favorite incense already hung in the air, giving the room the scent of a forest just after it rained mixed with a little bit of spice.

Impa knelt on the pillow facing the door, so Sheik took the one facing her.

"Sheik, heir to the Ishida clan, warrior of the Second Rank, and wielder of the blade Raiu. Today, you turn seventeen years old. In accordance with the ancient laws laid down by our forefathers, I, Impa, head of the Ishida clan and heir to the leadership of Kakariko, administer this ceremony so that you may continue to serve your bloodline until your dying breaths." Impa finally began, the Sheikah words seeming to echo around the room. "Thus far, you have been tasked with guarding the Princess and the Chosen Hero on their quest to defeat Calamity Ganon, once it reappears. Have you been successful in this regard?"

"I have."

"Then I bestow upon you this blessing of courage: may your blade never waver as long as your hand remains just. May you stand your ground and be prepared to give your life for those of your charges, for that is the most courageous act of all." As Impa spoke, she raised her hand. Sheik mirrored the action, and then a soft green aura enveloped their hands. A quiet sense of determination filled him, giving him the courage he had found himself lacking as this day approached. "Because you have no other ongoing tasks, the blessings of wisdom and power shall be performed for this assignment."

"I understand." 

"And so I bestow upon you this blessing of wisdom: may your eyes see the truth which your heart cannot. May you carry the sense to make decisions that others could not in the face of insurmountable tragedy, for that may be the mark of the truly wise." The green glow was replaced by blue, and a feeling that Sheik could only describe as similar to the experience of discovering a new and particularly impactful book or quote, or perhaps mastering an advanced technique. "I also bestow upon you this blessing of power: may your strength be that of your ancestors. May you use this strength for the good of others instead of for evil, as that would be a fatal dishonor upon yourself and your clan."

Their hands glowed red, and strength rushed through him. Which was good, because he was certainly going to need it for the next part. It wasn't actually part of the ceremony, but he knew it was coming anyway. The demonstration of his magic and the subsequent lecture was why he had been so nervous, not the actual blessings themselves. Impa probably didn't mean anything that she said- if anything, she likely wanted him to fail so she'd have a reason to publicly denounce him- but it was actually a fairly painless process every year. Less so was the way she would rip into him with her words afterward, telling him he needed to be better no matter how well he was already doing. 

Because it was never enough. Not for her, and likely not for anybody else if what she said about their opinions of him was true. He'd never really be enough.

She lowered her hand. He did the same and waited, trying not to drop her gaze now because that would make it worse. 

"To conclude this ceremony, I ask that you summon your magic and demonstrate that you are capable of using these blessings properly." Impa said. The words were spoken quietly, but she didn't need to yell in order to command respect. It was one of her best- and most dangerous- characteristics.

Sheik took a deep breath and closed his eyes, delving deep inside himself to draw out enough magic to do as he was asked. Once he felt that he had enough, he released the breath he had been holding and raised both of his hands, keeping his eyes closed. He didn't need to see to know that his hands were glowing with shadow magic. Next came the spell itself, which would generate the three symbols of the goddesses Din, Nayru, and Farore as spectral apparitions. It wasn't hard to cast, but it was hard to maintain. Each year the expected length got longer, and now he was up to a full minute. It required the caster to have a good deal of control over their magic, which made it a perfect yearly test outside of the rank exams, since those didn't happen at a regular interval in a warrior's life.

He recited the spell, minding the easily messed up sections, and soon enough, the three symbols appeared. Not that he could see them, considering that his eyes were closed. What came next was the most stressful minute of his life, as he fought to maintain the spell and not run out of magic before Impa told him to stop. Thankfully, right as he felt himself nearing burnout, his aunt finally spoke up.

"You may end the spell, for you have proven yourself adequately talented with the use of magic to apply the blessings now conferred upon you."

Relieved, Sheik dropped the spell- though he knew better than to let any outward signs of exhaustion show, it would be easy for Impa to tell how much it had taken out of him- and opened his eyes. As sad as it was, he felt the tiniest bit proud that he'd managed to get something close to approval out of her. Even if it was just memorized words she likely didn't mean, at least it was something... 

"Now that the official part is out of the way, I would like to speak with you about how... close you seem to be with both the Princess and the Hero." 

It almost felt like his spirit left his body as she spoke. Of course she was going to lecture him about the thing that would hurt the most. Sheik robotically dipped his head in a nod of acceptance, because he really didn't trust himself to speak now. Thankfully, she didn't comment on it. Maybe she was going to go easy on him today?

But, of course, it was foolish to even hope so, as proven by her next words.

"You are a damned fool."

"I have done what you asked of me, Aunt. I do not see what this is about." Sheik responded weakly.

"Do not lie to me!" Impa snapped, a slight scowl appearing on her face. He was in trouble. Hylia have mercy on his soul for once in his life. "I see right through you, Sheik. You cannot hide your feelings from me. The mere fact that you, after all this time, still have not let go of feeling in the first place is disgraceful, but this. You are supposed to be their protector, not their friend. Why do you not understand such a basic concept?"

"You think I have not tried?" Sheik said, raising his head to look at her. He fought to keep his anger and fear at bay, trying to keep them from bleeding over into his voice or expressions, but it was likely going to be a losing battle. "How am I supposed to keep Zelda at a distance, Aunt?"

His voice nearly broke out of desperation and no small amount of fear, but he recovered well. At least, he did in his opinion. It probably wasn't the case, but he had to focus on that. Otherwise he'd lose it and everything would overwhelm him right here.

"Simple. Remove yourself from your emotions, as is expected of you. Any other warrior would have no issue with this, yet you continue to prove that you are a weak-willed disappointment. If you simply just applied yourself more, we would not be having this conversation right now." Impa had also managed to get her tone of voice under control, though anger still simmered beneath the surface of her words. That was more scary than any amount of shouting, honestly.

It was no use trying to protest. She was right. He was a disappointment as long as he allowed his emotions to get the better of him. Sheikah warriors were tools to the Royal Family and nothing more. Unfeeling, uncaring, ever watchful. His whole life had been spent working towards this ideal, and yet he fell short every single time.

Sheik would never really be good enough anyway, so why was he still trying? Why was he still reaching for the praise he so desperately wanted, despite knowing deep down that he would never hear Impa tell him that she was proud of him?

"I have nothing more to say to you, disgraceful heir. You are unworthy of that title. Get out of my sight." Impa said coldly, folding her hands over her lap and pinning him with that disapproving stare of hers.

He tasted blood in his mouth as he rose to his feet and walked out, the pain from biting his tongue so hard barely even registering in his mind. Perhaps that was part of the reason behind the tears he felt spring to his eyes, but he knew better.

Zelda and Link weren't going to be back for a while, and he didn't particularly feel like going to spend time with other people in such a state. He felt a lot like any harsh word or judgmental stare sent in his direction could cause him to snap and... well, he didn't quite know what he'd do. Yell? Cry? A bit of both? It was hard to tell what he wanted to do more at the moment. Exhaustion, hurt, and anger all warred for attention in his mind. Everything was just too much. He couldn't possibly do this. 

He needed to get away from this hateful place. 

Unconsciously, his feet carried him onto the path that led left of the Elder's House, which terminated at the Telta Lake overlook.

But the lake wasn't the reason he'd come back here. The Tree of Fallen Spirits stood there, leaf-covered limbs gently swaying in the breeze as it stood guard over the clustered headstones scattered across the tranquil clearing.

This was his true destination, the path to the cemetery so engraved in his subconscious for moments like this that he found himself in front of his parents' grave within moments.

They were buried right next to the fence, in a spot that his father had jokingly called "the tomb with the greatest view in Hyrule" once when he took Sheik to visit the graves and tell him about the importance of remembering the dead. The day they were buried here, Sheik had sat by the freshly-dug earth for hours and whispered those same words back to them. Purah had eventually dragged him back inside as night fell, telling him that his parents wouldn't want him to freeze to death over their graves so soon after their own deaths.

"You have so much to live for, Sheik. Please, come back inside."

What a lie. He was nothing but a useless orphan. A warrior who ended up fighting with his heart more than his head, dishonoring the legacies of his parents and all those who walked before him.

"Mom, Dad... I'm so sorry." Sheik whispered, his voice breaking as he spoke. His words were probably almost impossible to understand, but that was fine. This wasn't for anybody else to hear anyway. "I turned seventeen today and all I can think of is how much you must be disappointed in me. I mean, I'm a Second Rank warrior and I still can't let go of my emotions. Everything hurts so bad. I just... I can't do this. I was going to be Zelda's sole protector and I ended up having to play second fiddle to the Chosen Hero. Aunt Impa thinks I'm a failure and she's right. Maybe it's a good thing you're not here to see how pathetic your son turned out to be."

He abruptly cut himself off with a choked sob, which only ended up making things worse. Soon, he was sitting with his right arm wrapped around his knee and his left hand covering his face. Sheik pulled his mask down and just cried, hating himself for every moment but completely unable to stop it. His whole body felt like it was shaking as all of the fear and worry and self-loathing that had been building up for the last day and a half hit him all at once.

In all honesty, Sheik had no idea how long he sat there for. It must have been a significant amount of time, though, because he heard footsteps on the grass behind him. He would have recognized the gait anywhere. Link had come to find him. Hurriedly, Sheik pulled up his mask and wiped his eyes, trying not to seem like he'd just been crying. It probably didn't work, but he was too exhausted to care much about the fact that he wasn't putting up the stone facade he tried so hard to maintain around Link, even after all this time.

"Mind if I sit here?" Link asked quietly.

"Go ahead."

Link settled into place beside him, keeping enough distance for Sheik to be comfortable and yet still within arm's reach, just in case.

They were silent for a while. Only the noise of the wind and the leaves of the Tree of Fallen Spirits rustling behind them kept it from being dead silent, though even those sounds seemed muted here. Anytime he came out here, it felt like the world was holding its breath out of respect for the fallen warriors who rested beneath the ground. It was very calming yet saddening at the same time.

"Why are you here?" Sheik finally asked without turning his head to look at Link.

"After Im- er, your aunt- came out of the house. And to the demonstration without you. Zelda figured something was wrong. She sent me to go take a look, saying something about how. She had the utmost confidence in the Sheikah warriors to protect. Her while I was gone. Also, she thought it would be better if I came. To talk to you." Link responded. "Are- are you alright?"

Sheik ducked the question by sighing and adjusting his position a little. "That does sound like something Zelda would do."

Silence fell over them again, stretching on long enough to be slightly uncomfortable. Which was a little surprising, given that silence between the two was rarely like that these days. In the beginning, sure, but now? Ugh, it was more confusing than anything else. Almost as confusing as the dull ache in the back of his mind that just wanted Link to hug him.

Where the hell had that even come from? He didn't need physical contact. Least of all with him.

"I honestly don't know." Sheik found himself saying, catching him completely off guard. He hadn't meant to respond to Link's question at all, let alone so suddenly. Gah, why couldn't he think straight when he was around this boy?

"That's okay." Link said simply. "It's okay to... not be okay. Or not be sure. I, um. I know how it feels. Even if I don't know everything about. Your relationship with your aunt. I do know that she hurt you and I want to. Help you. Hurt less?"

Goddesses, now he wanted to cry all over again. Why was Link so nice to him? Why didn't he hate him? Sheik certainly hadn't been the most pleasant person to Link, so... why?

"Link, I-" Sheik's voice broke, to his horror. He had never let Link see him this vulnerable, not even when he'd given him bits and pieces about the things he'd had to deal with over the years. But his will to keep resisting the feelings that certainly weren't hate, as much as he tried to pretend otherwise, was weakening. Link had proven, and kept proving, that he was so much better than Sheik had initially thought.

Link inched his hand over to Sheik's, which had come to rest on the ground without him noticing, and covered it with his own. Sheik's breath caught in his throat and he tensed up involuntarily, like he usually did when someone touched him unexpectedly. He couldn't even look at him now, but he was sure that Link was giving him that little smile that he... well, however he felt about it, because he doubted that he'd ever have the words to describe it.

Maybe it was less of him lacking the words themselves, but rather the courage to actually admit it to himself.

"It's okay."

"It doesn't feel like it." Sheik's voice was barely audible, and he hated saying this but it was true. It was true and he needed to say it. Admitting it is the first step toward overcoming it, or so Zelda told him. But instead of stopping there, he kept speaking. Hylia only knows why. "My parents are buried here. They died on the same day, almost eleven years ago now. I've lived with my aunt since, and you knew that already, but... I don't just come here on the anniversary of their death or my birthday. When she- when it hurts, I come back here and ask for my parents' forgiveness."

"You shouldn't have to." Link said. "I might not know what. Your parents were like. But I'm sure that they're both so proud of you. I mean, you've done so much. You're far from a disappointment."

"Tell that to my aunt." Sheik choked out, his fingers digging into the dirt. Link gently squeezed his hand, even going as far as to slowly brush his thumb across the back of his hand. He didn't really feel it, because of his glove, but even then a shiver raced down Sheik's spine as he did so. He ignored it (for the most part,) but it was there all the same.

"Oh, I will." Link sounded completely serious about it. He could hardly even fathom standing up to Impa like that, even when she wasn't in earshot to hear it. Sure, it was different for Link, not having had the same experience with her and all, but still. She was a very intimidating woman no matter who you were. "She shouldn't be doing that to you."

Maybe I deserve it.

The words were right at the tip of his tongue, but he couldn't make himself actually say them. Was it because he feared the response, or admitting to his doubts in the first place? Instead, Sheik bit down on his tongue and tried not to start crying again. Thankfully, he didn't bite the spot that was already sore from earlier.

"Listen, I... I know we're not. Exactly friends. But I-" Link started saying, only for Sheik to cut him off.

"No. By this point I'd say we're friends."

A soft noise of surprise almost like a little gasp fell from Link's lips. Sheik didn't need to look at him to know that he was staring at him, a shocked expression on his face that was probably the most emotion he'd ever shown all at once. "So all I've needed to do. All this time. Is get you in front of your parents' grave. To actually have a conversation about this kind of thing?" Link joked, his tone gently teasing yet much more cautious than usual, waiting to see if he would react negatively to a joke like this.

To his surprise, it actually made him feel a bit better. Sheik laughed, though it sounded almost like a sob, and turned his head to look at Link. "It certainly helped your case."

"Jokes aside. I'm honored that I've finally earned. A substantial bit of your trust."

"You actually have for a while now. I'm just not great at showing it. Or admitting it to myself in the first place."

Oh Hylia, he needed to shut up now. Otherwise he was going to say too much and regret it, because this boy was still his rival, damn it! They may be friends, but that doesn't change anything! Sure, this meant that his hatred (which hadn't been hatred for a long time, if he was being totally honest) had to turn into something more like affectionate dislike, or whatever you called the way friends could argue with each other but still support and care for the other at the same time.

"It's alright. I understand how that feels." Link laughed quietly. And if he wasn't mistaken, he spotted the hint of a blush on his face. That drew Sheik's attention to the fact he himself was also blushing, and judging by how hot his face felt, it was a miracle he hadn't noticed sooner. But why was he blushing? Ugh, this was damn confusing. "Needing time to sort out feelings and stuff. Is normal. Especially if you've been told that emotions aren't good all your life."

"Because they aren't." Sheik whispered. "All they do is cause problems. Emotions make everything hurt all the time and I don't want it to hurt anymore. I'm so... tired of it."

"Emotions make us who we are, Sheik. They hurt, yeah. But it doesn't hurt all. The time. Sometimes it's actually kinda nice." Link was smiling at him again, a sad little smile of sorts that seemed to say more than any words ever could, if only Sheik was brave enough to try and figure them out. "It won't always hurt so bad. With enough time and space to heal. Even the worst emotions can become beautiful. Loss becomes love. Despair becomes joy. I think you get the idea, yeah?"

"You sound like a proverb textbook, if all of the proverbs were less about removing emotion and more about trying to heal from the bad ones." Sheik murmured. It was mostly to distract himself from thinking too deeply about what Link had just said, or his smile, or how his hand was still covering Sheik's. Later. He'd deal with it later. Once he wasn't so emotionally exhausted.

Link shrugged. "Just remember that, okay? Emotions are sucky, but they're human." With that, he drew his hand back to his body and prepared to stand up. "I'll, uh, leave you alone now. Wouldn't want to overstay my welcome. Also, I should get back to Zelda. You're welcome to. Join us. If you feel up to it."

He wanted to reach out and tell him to stay. But the feeling scared him, and after having to deal with so many other emotions that he hated today, Sheik really didn't have the capacity to either ignore the fear and do it anyway, or even just push it away and act cold like his aunt wanted him to. After what had just happened, how could he even think about giving Link the cold shoulder? It seemed almost unfathomable. Repaying his kindness with solid ice was one thing he absolutely could not do, rival or not. Maybe things would change and his view would shift once he got out of this weird state of mind he found himself caught in, but he honestly doubted that.

So, instead, Sheik stayed where he was, nodding his acknowledgement of Link's words while already having silently made up his mind. He couldn't face his aunt again. Not so soon, and certainly not in this state. She would see right through everything that had just happened and practically flay him alive for it, which would likely prompt another... whatever this was, because he would not use the word breakdown to describe it, and it went without saying how terrible that would be. No, he would stay here and get a grip on himself.

As Link walked away, Sheik couldn't help but feel like things between them had shifted drastically just from one conversation.